What Happens At Charlie's Wedding
by velvetbutterfly
Summary: Charlie's best man has Bella Swan moaning and melting everywhere, but no string attached sex suddenly becomes complicated. And what will happen when Bella meets someone else? Someone who just happens to be the best man's son. -COMPLETE-
1. Coming Home

Bella Swan sighed as she drove past the sign welcoming them to Forks, Washington. Her best friend, Alice Brandon, looked at her, but made no comment, there was no need to. After being friends for 10 years they both knew what each other were thinking and Alice knew exactly what Bella thought of Forks.

Bella had grown up in the small, rainy town most of her life. Her parents, Charlie and Renee, had moved from Seattle shortly before she was born, neither wanting to raise a family in the city. Charlie became the Chief of Police and Renee played the part of stay-at-home mom until Bella was school aged and then went on to teach first grade.

Bella had a normal childhood complete with birthday parties, backyard BBQ's, trips to the zoo, and family dinner on Sunday. She actually thought she had the perfect family. Until the fighting started and those family dinners she always thought were lame disappeared. Bella was thirteen when her mother told her they were moving to Phoenix. Charlie was staying in Forks. Her parents were getting a divorce. She felt like her entire world was falling apart. She remembered crying for days unable to do anything else. She knew begging them to get back together wouldn't work. She had no choice but to move to Phoenix with Renee.

Phoenix was the complete opposite of Forks. It was sunny and hot and rarely rained. And it was huge! Bella was sure she'd need a map to get around for the first, oh, of couple years. But she slowly settled into her new home, her new school and made new friends. Despite being unsure about her new life, she grew to love Phoenix. She only saw Charlie during the summer and soon Forks didn't seem like home anymore to Bella. She was happy in Phoenix with the sun, the sand, and the heat, but as much as she wanted to cut Forks out of her life forever, she couldn't. Charlie only had her, even if it was only for 8 weeks out of the year.

The summer before she graduated high school, Bella had been visiting Charlie when he announced he had met someone. Her name was Esme Cullen and she'd just moved to Forks. They'd met in line at the Thriftway, and after a bit of chit-chat, Charlie invited her out for coffee.

"You'll like her, Bells," Charlie said the first time they met. "She's really funny and smart too! She owns her own decorating business."

And Bella had liked her. She brought out the fun side of Charlie, a side Bella hadn't seen in years. Bella knew right from the start they were perfect for each other.

Now that Charlie had someone in his life besides her, Bella felt a little less guilty about "quitting" Forks after graduation. Since that summer five years ago, she had only been to visit Charlie, and Esme now, a handful of times.

She had no intention of coming back this summer either, but then Charlie called.

"I'm getting married, kid!" he announced.

"That's great, Dad!" And it really was.

Then Esme had gotten on the phone and asked her to be a bridesmaid.

_Ugh._

"Sure, Esme I'd love to." _Not_.

It wasn't that she was against weddings in general; she was just against weddings that involved her in any way. But here she was, about to spend two glorious weeks in Forks. Of course, Alice had to be dragged along for the ride.

"C'mon, Bella," Alice said breaking into her thoughts, "it won't be that bad."

"How do you figure?"

"Weddings always have single men," she said grinning.

"Single men my dad's age."

Alice shrugged. "With age comes experience."

Bella rolled her eyes.

"So, what am I supposed to do while you're off doing bridesmaid stuff?"

"Um, come with me?" Bella quickly glanced at her friend. "Esme promised all I had to do was show up for rehearsal, the actual act, and that's it."

"Isn't there more to it than that?"

"Not for me," Bella said with a grin.

Alice didn't look convinced.

Bella turned onto Charlie's street and then into his driveway a few seconds later. His cruiser was there, along with Esme's lime green VW Beetle, and another car that Bella did not recognize.

Charlie was at the front door before they'd even gotten out of the car.

"Bells!"

"Hey, Dad!"

Bella met him half way, giving him a quick hug before turning back to Alice. "Dad, this is Alice Brandon. Esme said I could bring a date," Bella explained with a wink.

"She wishes." Alice smiled, walking towards them. "I'm a lot cooler than anyone she dates."

Charlie chuckled and held out his hand. "It's nice to meet you, Alice."

"You, too, Mr. Swan," Alice said shaking his hand.

"Please, call me Charlie."

"Okay, Charlie."

Charlie slung an arm around Bella's shoulders and steered them towards the house. Bella nodded towards the strange vehicle.

"Wedding guests staying with you?" she asked.

"Oh, that's Esme's brother's car." He opened the door for them. "Didn't I tell you she had a brother?"

"No, I think you skipped that detail."

"Oh. Well, he's my best man," Charlie said as if that explained everything.

"Skipped that one, too," Bella muttered entering the house.

She noticed the changes to the décor immediately. The old square oak table was no longer in the kitchen. In its place was a round dark table with a glass top, and of course matching dining room chairs. Dark paneled walls still surrounded them, but a tan color had replaced the bright yellow cabinets, and the white linoleum had been traded in for hardwood floors. New furniture was in the living room as well and the old pictures that once cluttered the top of the fire place had vanished. There were still a couple of her, but fine art took up most of the space. Bella also noticed new carpet.

"Wow, Dad you've really spiffed up the place."

Charlie's cheeks turned a faint pink. "Yeah, well, that's Esme's touch. She really knows what she's doing," he added as if he was defending her work.

"No, I like it. It looks good," Bella assured him.

"Thanks, Bella."

Everyone turned towards the stairs where the voice had come from. Esme smiled, her caramel-colored hair, which she'd added blond streaks too, hung around her heart-shaped face. Bella had never seen her hair so long before. Usually she kept the cut chin length.

"Hey, Esme." Bella smiled.

"Hello, dear." Esme hugged her and then turned to Alice.

"Hi, I'm Alice," she said not waiting for Bella to introduce them.

Esme nodded. "Welcome to our home, Alice."

"Thanks." Alice smiled.

Charlie excused himself to get the bags out of the car when Esme looked at Bella.

"I hope you don't mind, but your father and I purchased a new bed so we put my old double in your room. It'll give you and Alice more room than a twin anyway."

"Oh." Bella looked at Alice, who shrugged, and then back at Esme. "No, that's fine."

"Unless, you'd prefer not to share a bed," Esme added quickly. "The couch is a pull out, so one of you could sleep on that. I just thought you'd want the privacy of the bedroom."

"Really, Esme, sharing a bed is no problem," Bella said, looking at Alice to confirm this.

"Yeah, no problem," Alice repeated. "We've bunked together before and survived."

Esme beamed. "Wonderful! Now, Bella we have a dress fitting tomorrow at noon and after that-"

Esme was cut off by a soft, but strong masculine voice.

"-no idea why women have to bring _so_ much stuff!" His grin was teasing as he entered the house, Alice's huge suitcase dragging behind him.

Bella's mouth went dry at the sight of the blond god that had just walked into her father's kitchen. Rain clung to his hair, making it almost glisten in the light, and his work out shirt slightly hugged his chiselled body. His biceps flexed as he set Alice's luggage to the side and then helped Charlie with the other pieces.

Bella tried to swallow, but couldn't. And then he turned around and flashed her and Alice a dazzling smile and Bella felt faint.

"Bella, Alice," Esme's voice sounded far away, "this is my brother Carlisle."


	2. Oh, Dr Cullen

_**SM owns all things Twilight. I just like to make them do naughty things ;)**_

Carlisle Cullen was the sexiest man Bella had ever laid eyes on. His eyes weren't just green, they were a bright emerald color, and they sparkled with amusement. Dimples deeply indented his cheeks and his smile revealed perfect straight teeth. He didn't have the body of an athlete, but one of someone who definitely exercised regularly. His skin had more color than it should, so he either visited tanning salons, or didn't live around Forks.

Alice nudged her, murmuring something that sounded like, "Wake up, Bella."

"What?" Bella blushed and looked at Alice. _Oh my God, how mortifying. _"Sorry, I must have zoned out."

"Right." Alice dragged out the word, grinning. "That long drive here must have taken a lot out of you."

Bella glared while fighting the urge to do bodily harm to her pixie-like friend.

"You didn't drive the entire way, did you?" Esme asked motherly concern in her voice.

Charlie frowned.

"No," Bella assured them quickly. "We stopped in Redding for the night."

Bella had been careful to avoid any eye contact with Carlisle this entire time - he'd probably noticed her drooling earlier - but she could feel his eyes on her. She risked a quick glance from under her lashes and saw that he was smiling at her.

"Hi," he said his smile widening.

Bella's cheeks flared at being caught like a school girl sneaking peeks at her crush.

"Um, hi." She took a deep breath and tried to act like she had a truck load of confidence. Not an easy thing to do when your face could be mistaken for a tomato. "I'm Bella."

"Yeah, I thought so." His eyes twinkled. "You look more like Charlie than your friend does." He winked, teasing her.

"Yeah, she looks like Dad. I look like Mom," Alice joked coming to stand beside Bella. "No one ever guesses we're sisters."

Carlisle chuckled.

Esme's voice reached them from the kitchen. "Charlie, could you and Carlisle take the girls' things upstairs, please."

"Oh, we can do that." Bella reached for her bag at the same time Carlisle did.

Their fingers brushed and their eyes locked. Bella's breathing quickened, Carlisle's eyes danced with excitement. She smelled the sweet scent of his breath. What seemed like minutes, but were really seconds, passed with the two of them like that.

"Don't be silly," Carlisle whispered. His lips were inches from hers. Bella shivered. "Your dad and I can handle this." He ran his thumb over the back of her hand, whether accidentally or not Bella wasn't sure, and then was gone upstairs with Charlie.

Bella's head was spinning. What was wrong with her? Carlisle Cullen was just a man after all, like any other guy she'd met. Only…she'd never felt anything like this just from a simple touch from anyone else.

"Wow, Bella, do you need Charlie to turn the air on?" Alice asked. "You're looking a little flushed." She giggled.

"Shut up, Alice," Bella muttered as Esme walked in holding a tray of refreshments.

"Did I miss the joke?" she asked confused as to why Alice was laughing.

"Don't worry about it, Esme," Bella said helping her. "Alice isn't funny, anyway."

Bella set the tray down on the coffee table, helped herself to a glass, and then sat on the couch folding her legs under her.

"So, how are the wedding plans coming along?" she asked taking a sip of iced tea.

Esme's face lit up. "Everything is in perfect order. Like I was saying before, we have a dress fitting tomorrow, I have to talk to the caterers about a few last minute details, and I'd love it if you could come with me to the bakery."

"The bakery?"

"I've narrowed it down to two cakes, but can't choose between them. Charlie doesn't care either way; you know how he doesn't have much of a sweet tooth, so I wanted your opinion."

"Oh. Sure." Bella smiled.

"When are the other bridesmaids arriving?" Alice asked sitting in the recliner.

"Bella is the one and only." Esme slightly blushed. "I didn't want you to feel pressured into helping, so I didn't tell you. Charlie and I wanted something small anyway." She shrugged.

Bella instantly felt guilty. "Esme, you should have told me. I'm sure there was so much to do and you needed the help-"

"Its fine, Bella," she insisted. "The wedding is small and there really wasn't much to take care of."

"No one works better under pressure than Esme," Carlisle said descending the stairs behind Charlie.

Bella watched him sit opposite of Alice in the other recliner, leaving Charlie to sit by Esme. She frowned at his statement. "That still doesn't make me feel better," she muttered.

"So, Bella, Esme and your father tell me you're an English major," Carlisle said.

Bella looked at him and for a minute was lost in his eyes again. They were just so beautiful. She felt like the room was spinning every time she looked at him. And his mouth. Wow. His lips were perfect, so perfect that Bella couldn't help but stare at them whenever he said something. The way they moved was like an art. Oh, what she wouldn't give to have those lips on her.

Would they feel as soft as they looked? Was he a good kisser? Was he a gentle? Did he take his time and savour every second, or was he more forceful, taking what he wanted, any way he wanted it? And his tongue…what would _that_ feel like on her? Sliding against her lips, mating with her tongue, slowly exploring her mouth. His teeth taking her bottom lip prisoner.

Oh my God his teeth! Nipping at her lips, her earlobes, biting her neck, and then moving down to graze her nip-

Alice cleared her throat bringing Bella back to the present where everyone was staring at her…while she still stared at _him_.

_Oh, no._ Her face was burning. Again.

Here she was, maybe two feet away from her father, having fantasies of his best man. Who also happened to be her future step-mother's brother, which made him her-

_Oh, shit!_ No, she did not just go there!

Step-uncle?

_Oh. My. God._

Wasn't that against the law?

"Um, Bella?" Charlie sounded worried. "Are you okay? You look a little flushed."

"She always looks flushed," Alice teased.

"No, Charlie's right," Esme agreed handing Bella her glass. "Maybe Carlisle should look you over."

Bella could feel her air way being cut off as she choked on the iced tea. Her eyes watered as she gasped for air.

"What?" she croaked.

"Carlisle's a doctor," Esme explained clearly trying to hide her amusement. "Well, a surgeon, but if you're not feeling well-"

"I'm fine," she said quickly. Her voice sounded hoarse.

"Bella, I'd be more then happy to help if you're not feeling well," Carlisle said leaning forward.

"Really, I'm fine." Great, now she sounded frantic. But he was about to get up! She forced a smile and briefly met his concerned gaze. "This happens all the time."

Alice snickered. Bella threw her a warning glare.

"Okay." Carlisle sat back still watching her.

"I'm sorry," Bella said, "what were you saying before?"

Carlisle smiled. "I was asking about your schooling."

"Oh. Well, it's really not that exciting. Alice," she said, turning to her, "has the interesting career plan. She's a fashion student."

"Really?" Esme immediately liked this. "You want to be a designer?"

Alice nodded. "I've always wanted to design. I love creating new styles. It's my dream."

"And she's amazing at it," Bella added. "You wait and see, in a few years Mary Alice is going to be hotter than Marc Jacobs." She beamed at Alice, who rolled her eyes, but was smiling.

"Mary Alice?" Esme asked.

"She's already named my line." Another eye roll. "Mary Alice is my actual name," she explained. "I just prefer Alice."

Bella's intention to get the focus off of herself worked. Esme and Alice were now in an in depth conversation about clothes, Charlie had excused himself and Carlisle…. Bella looked up and saw that Carlisle was still watching her. She quickly dropped her gaze pretending to listen to Esme and Alice.

"Esme," Charlie said returning to the room hands stuffed in his pockets, "since the girls are bunking together I offered our couch to Carlisle. There's no point in him staying at a hotel when we have an extra bed."

_What_?

Bella jerked her head up so fast she was surprised it didn't snap off. Carlisle was going to stay here? Under the same roof as her? At night?

"Of course Carlisle should stay with us," Esme agreed.

"Are you sure?" Carlisle looked at Esme, but sent a fleeting glance Bella's way. "It won't be too crowded?"

"Nonsense." Esme waved her hand dismissing the thought.

"It won't be awkward?" he asked this time looking at both Alice and Bella.

"Not for me!" Alice said a little too quickly.

Everyone seemed to look at Bella now waiting for her to agree.

"No awkwardness here," she finally said feeling exactly opposite.

Carlisle smiled. "Great!" He stood. "I'll just stop by the hotel to pick up my things and check out then."

"Maybe we can all go to dinner tonight," Esme suggested.

"Good idea, honey." Charlie said smiling warmly at her. The love that flowed between the two of them was almost suffocating.

"Okay, so I'll just meet you at the restaurant then." Carlisle finally said clearly feeling uncomfortable caught in a moment between his sister and soon-to-be brother-in-law. "Which one?"

"The Lodge?" Esme asked naming Charlie's favorite place.

Everyone agreed.

"Bella, should we freshen up?" Alice asked clearing wanting a minute alone to grill her.

"Right."

Bella and Alice retreated to Bella's old room to get ready. As she walked in, Bella noticed, aside from the new bed, this room was the only one not to have gotten a complete makeover. Everything was exactly the same and for some reason that comforted Bella. Being in her old room she finally felt like she was home and not just a visitor.

"There's only one bathroom, so if you want in there you better go now," Bella warned Alice.

"Forget the bathroom for a minute," Alice said flopping herself on the bed, "and let's talk about _Dr_. Cullen."

Bella rolled her eyes even though her heart raced at the mere mention of his name.

"He's movie star hot, don't you think?" Alice was practically panting.

Bella shrugged rummaging through her suitcase to avoid Alice's eyes. "He's just a man."

"Oh, please!" She paused, and then said the thing she knew would get a reaction from Bella. "The way he was watching you…"

Bella froze. "What?"

"Oh, c'mon, it was so obvious."

_Obvious to everyone?_

"Watching me how?"

"Like he wanted to rip your clothes off right there," Alice stated.

Bella felt the blush start to creep back into her cheeks. Why did she have to embarrass so easily?

"I think you read too many romance novels, Alice." It came out a whisper, her voice thick.

Alice snorted. "Whatever. I know what I saw."

Bella turned to face her friend.

"What?" Alice arched one perfectly shaped eyebrow.

"It's just…. Well, I had a thought."

"A naughty thought?" Alice grinned.

"No, it's kind of twisted." She sat next to Alice. "With Esme marrying my dad, and Carlisle being her brother, it makes him my step-uncle." Bella grimaced. "It's so twisted and sick."

"It's so hot!"

"Okay, you're twisted and sick."

"No, seriously, he's like, the forbidden fruit." Bella was afraid she might have to get a bib so Alice wouldn't drool all over her shirt.

"You're not supposed to be encouraging this, Alice."

Alice looked shocked. "Why the hell not?"

"Because it's wrong!" Bella exclaimed.

"What is so wrong about it? If it was reversed and Dr. Hotness was interested in me I'd want you to encourage it."

"Not that I would have to," Bella teased. "You'd probably have had him naked at the front door."

"Probably." Alice laughed and then she looked serious. "You deserve some fun, Bella. You've been shut down ever since James."

Bella shuddered at the thought. It had been over a year, but the image of James's betrayal was still fresh in her mind. She'd wasted five years with someone she thought she'd be with forever.

They'd met on spring break when she'd been with friends in California. Everyone had persuaded her to try surfing, and stupidly she's agreed. She'd wanted to impress Mike, a guy she had a major crush on at the time. She knew surfing would be her death even before the huge wave had dragged her under. And as the water filled her lungs, and she briefly wondered if her body would reach the shore, he was suddenly there, hauling her to the surface.

Fit, tan and tattooed. Hair the color of the sandy beach and an ego just as big. Mike was quickly forgotten as he carried her back to safety. The love Gods must have been smiling down on her that day because even though she looked like a drowned rat, he still found her irresistible.

His name was James; he was twenty-two, and just finishing up four years at Berkeley. He planned to move back to Phoenix after the summer. Bella took that as a sign they belonged together. Renee loved him, Charlie thought he sounded like a very nice boy, and all her friends were envious. At seventeen, Bella was sure she had found her soul mate. Her everything.

Until, five years later, she found her everything in bed with her college roommate. She'd been devastated, more than just heartbroken. She felt like her soul had been ripped in half. Alice was right, she had shut down. She'd stopped feeling anything.

Until now.

Until Carlisle Cullen looked at her.

"So, is that why you had that panic attack earlier?" Alice asked snapping her out of the past. "Because you realized you'd be technically related?"

"It wasn't a panic attack," Bella muttered, "but, yes. That and he's at least twenty years older than me."

"Who cares?" Alice groaned. "Really Bella, who gives a shit. It's not like you're marrying the guy. He's hot, he's available, he's a doctor, and he wants you."

Bella bit her lip bottom lip and watched Alice get up and go over to her suitcase. She plucked out the only skirt Bella had brought, red with a black trim that was an inch above the knee, and a matching halter top and tossed them at Bella.

"Let loose and have fun, Isabella."

Instead of thinking of more reasons why it wasn't a good idea to bang Charlie's best man, Bella got dressed and drove to the Lodge.

Carlisle was already there waiting for them. He'd gotten a corner booth, so they sat in a circle; Charlie and Esme on one side, Alice beside them, Bella was beside her and Carlisle was to Bella's left. They were so close their thighs almost touched. Bella found it hard to concentrate on the conversations going on around her being this close to him.

"So, who's older?" Alice suddenly asked. "I mean, neither you nor Carlisle looks a day over thirty."

Everyone laughed except Bella, who pinched Alice's side, to which Alice elbowed her in the ribs.

"I'm older," Carlisle answered smiling. "I'm forty-one." He looked at Bella as he said this.

Her heart rate picked up. Any faster and it would soon burst out of her chest. This couldn't be good for her blood pressure. If he could do that to her with just a simple look what would happen if he touched her?

She'd probably die of cardiac arrest. Good thing he was a doctor, he could at least try and revive her with mouth to mouth-

_Mmm, mouth to mouth with Dr. Cullen._

Those perfect lips pressed to hers. His hand on her chest…. Maybe she should pretend to pass out right now. She could do that. She could hold her breath until he kissed her, er, revived her, and if her tongue just happened to accidentally invade his mouth….

_Ugh._

She had to stop this. Thinking of kissing him should not be turning her on this much. She shifted in her seat, bumping his leg in the process. That innocent touch went straight to her core. Bella ground her teeth together against a moan. She crossed her legs trying to relieve some of the ache between them.

"You're awfully fidgety tonight, Bella," Charlie said.

_Why did he have to be observant now_?

"Uh, yeah, must be all that coffee kicking in."

"You mean those two whole cups you had all day?" Alice asked fighting a smile.

Bella glared. "You know my low tolerance for caffeine, Alice," she growled warning her to shut up with her eyes.

Alice ignored her. "So, being a doctor, Carlisle you must not get a lot of free time," she questioned.

Carlisle shrugged. "No, not a lot, but it's worth it. I love what I do. The only down fall is not being able to spend that much time with my family. Especially my son," he added like an after thought.

"You have a son?" Bella asked and then regretted it. The question sounded like she was disappointed.

Carlisle slowly nodded, studying her reaction. "He's twenty and is attending Juilliard."

"He's a very gifted musician," Esme added, pride filling her voice.

"Yes, he is." Carlisle's smile was almost sad.

So he was a father. Did that mean…. Bella's eyes flickered to his left hand, but his ring finger was bare. Not even a slight tan line. Even though she knew that didn't really mean anything, Bella felt relieved.

She reached for her water glass and was just about to take a sip when she suddenly felt a hand on her bare knee.

And she was pretty sure it wasn't Alice.


	3. Alone in Charlie's Kitchen

_**SM owns all thing Twilight**_

_**I own dirty thoughts of Carlisle. **_

_Holy, shit! _Carlisle's hand was on her knee!

No, not just _on_ her knee. He was rubbing his thumb in slow, teasing circles.

_He was caressing her!_

Bella forgot how to breathe. Her head was spinning, her lungs burned from lack of oxygen and her heart was beating a mile a second. She felt flushed, and not just on her face this time, but all over her body. She wouldn't be surprised if she soon broke out in a sweat.

All of this just from him rubbing her knee. Her knee! It was such a simple, innocent gesture. Although, she knew there was nothing simple, or innocent, about it.

The air _whooshed _out of her so fast she felt light-headed. She realized this might actually kill her. There was no way she'd be able to survive being with Carlisle Cullen, actually _being _with him naked, hot, and sweaty, if this made her almost lose consciousness.

She tired to concentrate on her breathing - _in, out, in, out _- hoping to slow down her pounding heart.

Could he hear it? Did he know the effect he was having on her?

As if he could read her thoughts and was answering her question he squeezed her knee.

_Oh, he knew!_

She swallowed, afraid to look at him, but also afraid not to. She had to look, to know what he was doing. She quickly darted her eyes to his face only to discover he wasn't paying any attention to her. He was talking to Charlie, - of all people! - having a completely normal conversation with him while he felt his daughter up under the table.

Bella giggled finding the thought slightly funny.

Alice looked at her, curiosity raising her eyebrows.

"I know it's not very traditional," Charlie said smiling at Bella clearing thinking her outburst was about something he said.

_Ah, crap._ Had she just insulted her father?

"Actually, from what Bella has told me about you," Alice said looking at Bella catching onto her panicked expression, "going fishing for your bachelor party sounds perfect." She smiled at Charlie.

"I agree, Dad." _Thank you, Alice!_ "You're definitely not the strip club type."

Carlisle chucked beside her and moved his hand a little higher. It was under her skirt now.

"Is there even a strip club in Forks?" he asked.

"No." Charlie laughed along with him "I think you'd have to go to Seattle for that." He looked at Esme. "Or have a very creative partner."

Esme's face turned red.

_Oh, sweet Jesus. _That was more information than Bella ever wanted to know about her father's sex life. She looked over at Alice who'd pressed her lips together to keep from laughing. Bella sipped her water hoping to keep the disturbing images out of her head.

Carlisle moved his hand to her thigh. She was sure if he tried he'd be able to stroke her burning center with the tip of his finger. The thought almost sent her into convulsions.

_Need to focus, need to focus,_ Bella chanted.

"So," Bella squeaked. She cleared her throat and tried again. "Esme, do you have any bachelorette plans?"

She had to keep her attention on the conversation before she did something appalling. Like, throwing herself on the floor, spreading her legs and begging Carlisle to take her. After all, it was going to be embarrassing enough to explain why there was a huge wet spot on her seat when she stood to leave.

"I really hadn't thought about it," Esme answered her.

"Well, we have to do something!" Alice stated.

Esme hesitated, before answering. "I'm not really the party type."

"We don't have to party, Esme. Dinner and a few drinks after, or we could see a movie," Alice suggested. "Keep it simple."

"We'd have to go to Port Angeles for a movie," Esme mused.

Alice shrugged. "So, we drive to Port Angeles." She paused. "Where's Port Angeles?"

Esme laughed and started explaining to Alice about the neighboring city.

"Are you not hungry, Bella?" Carlisle asked his voice low and intimate, while his hand still massaged her thigh.

Bella shivered and noticed for the first time that their food had been brought. She watched Carlisle spear one of his roasted potatoes and slowly bring it to his mouth. When his lips wrapped around the fork she immediately understood what was so appealing about mixing food with sex.

She picked up her own fork and absent-mindedly started eating. She didn't taste anything, she didn't smell anything and she was unaware of everything, but the man sitting beside her.

"Are you uncomfortable, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

Bella looked at the others who were chatting amongst themselves.

"Uncomfortable isn't the word I'd use." Her answer was barely above a whisper.

"Is it strange for you?"

"A little, but not in a bad way," she added quickly. She blushed at her admission.

"I expected it would be."

"Why?" Bella asked, puzzled.

"It's just been so long I thought it might be a little odd."

_Wait. What? How did he know how long it had been?_

"I don't understand." She looked at him feeling unsettled.

He simply shrugged. "You just seem so tense every time the wedding is mentioned I just thought it might feel a little bizarre for you seeing Charlie with someone after being alone for so long."

Bella was speechless. The wedding? Charlie? That's what he was talking about! She ground her teeth together, aggravated.

"No, I'm glad my dad has found someone he wants to be with," Bella huffed turning her attention back to her food.

Carlisle smiled knowingly. His fingers twitched on her leg. "And what about you?" he asked.

"What about me?" she sniffed.

"Are you involved with anyone?"

The question caught her off guard. "Does it matter?"

His smile faltered. "Yes."

"Are you?" she asked instead of answering, keeping her eyes on her plate.

"Does it matter?" he asked playing her game.

She looked up and finally shrugged, but didn't answer. She turned to Charlie instead. "So, Dad, when's the fishing trip? We'll have to make Esme's plans for the same day."

Carlisle squeezed her leg, not enough to hurt her, but enough to get her attention. Apparently, he didn't like to be left hanging.

"Saturday," Charlie said. "The wedding's next weekend." Everyone knew this, so it sounded like he was reminding himself.

"Is there a honeymoon?" Alice asked unable to hide her excitement. "And the dress? What does it look like? No, wait!" she exclaimed stopping Esme from answering. "Don't tell me. The groom can not know one detail about the dress."

Charlie wrapped an arm around Esme, who smiled up at him.

"We're going to Mexico for a week. Charlie's never been on a real vacation I wasn't sure if I could drag him away from the station for much longer than that," Esme teased.

Alice launched into one of her spring break stories in Cancun, thankfully leaving the parts that involved Bella out. That was something she didn't need her father knowing about.

Carlisle eventually removed his hand from Bella's leg. The loss of contact left Bella feeling like she had been sucker punched. He excused himself ten minutes later, not sparing her a glance.

Alice leaned in picking up on the sudden tension between them and asked what was going on. Bella shook her head, side glancing at Esme and Charlie, indicating she'd fill her in later.

Finally, Charlie declared it was past his bedtime and everyone started getting ready to leave. Bella slid from the booth, discreetly looking to make sure she hadn't ruined it. Her stomach dropped at the thought that even though the booth was left as good as new, her chance with Carlisle may not be so lucky.

She turned around to reach for her jacket and found the man in question holding it, waiting to help her put it on. Taking a deep breath, she jammed her arms into the sleeves, maybe a little too roughly considering it snapped the jacket out of his hands. Carlisle took the opportunity to lift her hair out from under the jacket, dragging his fingers along the back of her neck as he did. He inhaled the scent of her shampoo and sighed.

"Isabella," he whispered.

Before she could react, he had stepped away and was telling Charlie the check was already taken care of. She stood there frozen, watching her father pat him on the back, evidently thanking him. She probably would have stood there all night if Alice hadn't grabbed her arm and demanded to know everything.

"I'll tell you at the house," Bella hissed.

Charlie and Esme had come with her and Alice, so the drive home was quiet. Bella could practically hear the wheels in Alice's head turning. As it was she was almost bouncing up and down in her seat dying for details.

The silence finally got to her and she demanded, "Are you driving extra slow, Bella?"

"No, why?"

"It just didn't seem to take this long to get to the restaurant, that's all." She shrugged remembering they weren't alone.

When they did arrive at Charlie's place, Bella barely had time to say goodnight, before Alice was dragging her upstairs.

"That was subtle, Alice." Bella threw her purse on the floor along with her jacket and shoes.

"Please, don't treat clothing that way." Alice cringed. "So?"

"So?" Bella stretched out on the bed.

"Don't make me hurt you," Alice threatened sitting beside her.

Bella laughed. "As if you could." She sighed. "There's nothing to tell."

"Sure there isn't. Why were you almost hyperventilating at dinner then?"

Straight to the point. Yep, that was Alice. Bella frowned. "It was all over a stupid touch."

"Excuse me?"

"He touched me."

Alice's eyes widened. "Where?"

"My leg."

Alice's expression went from excited, to confused, to disappointed in two seconds flat. She scowled. "That's it?"

"That's my point!" Bella sat up. "Alice, all he did was touch my leg, and-"

"You were dripping more than a leaky faucet?" She grinned.

"Exactly." Bella exhaled noisily

"Bella, that's a good thing," Alice declared excited once again. "Just imagine what it's going to be like when he jumps you!"

Bella rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I think I might die." Alice snickered. "Seriously, I was this close," she said holding her finger and thumb together, "to having a stroke tonight."

Alice was thoughtful. "Really? You felt all that just from a seventh grade touch?"

"I don't know what you were doing in seventh grade, but having boys feel me up in front of my father wasn't something I did."

Alice rolled her eyes this time. "You know what I mean." She was quiet for a minute. "That does present a problem, though."

"Why?"

"Well, if it feels that good just to have his hand on your leg, when you two do actually get it on everyone in a ten mile radius is going to have to evacuate, or risk hearing you come."

Bella groaned and tossed a pillow at her friend. "Will you, please, be serious?"

"Oh, I am." Alice laughed throwing the pillow back.

"I'm going to get ready for bed." Bella scooted off the bed and grabbed the old t-shirt and sweats she slept in.

"Umm…." Alice looked like she was in pain.

Bella sighed. "What?"

"Are you really going to walk around in that? What if you run into Carlisle?"

"I didn't bring anything else."

"As usual, Alice to the rescue." She grabbed a pink spaghetti strap tank top and matching pajama bottoms, with white hearts on no less, and handed them to Bella.

"Uh, Alice-"

"One night of pink is not going to kill you, Bella," Alice snapped. "We'll go shopping tomorrow and pick up a few new things for you."

Bella swallowed back any remark and stomped out of the bedroom, crossing the hallway to the bathroom. She quickly changed, combed the tangles out of her hair and brushed her teeth. Finished, she cracked the door opened and listened.

She could hear Charlie snoring already and vaguely wondered how Esme could sleep through that, but she could also hear the T.V. on downstairs. She paused outside her bedroom door. Looking down at herself she had to admit Alice's clothes did look better than her own worn out shirt and sweats.

On impulse, Bella dropped her clothes outside the bedroom door and went downstairs.

Carlisle was at the far end of the couch watching what Bella presumed was TSN, or some other sports channel like it. The creak in the stairs gave her away and he looked up. Bella suddenly felt self-conscious in her borrowed outfit.

It wasn't like she was walking around half naked. What she was wearing was really very modest. It was more like something a twelve year old would wear rather than a twenty-three year old. Especially a twenty-three year old that wanted to get laid. But it was more revealing than what she was used to. Her old t-shirt covered her completely. This spaghetti strap thing left her arms bare and from the top of her breasts up uncovered. It wasn't like she was a prude, but she was out of her comfort zone.

"Hi," she said shyly not sure how to act around him after what happened at dinner.

"Hi." He looked her up and down and grinned. "Cute."

Bella rolled her eyes. "It's Alice's."

"Did you forget your clothes?"

"Not exactly," she muttered crossing her arms over her breasts.

His eyebrows lifted. "Okay." He turned back to the T.V.

Bella waited for him to say something more. He didn't. Annoyed, she stalked off to the kitchen.

What was wrong with him? One minute he was into her, the next…nothing. Did he have a multiple personality disorder or something? She grabbed a bottled water out of the fridge and slammed the door closed a little too hard in frustration.

"Isabella?"

She jumped, startled at the sound of his voice.

"I'm sorry," he said.

She turned around. "For?"

"If I offended you."

"Why would you think you offended me?" she asked taken back.

"You left."

"I was thirsty." She lifted her bottle. "That was the reason I came down here."

_Liar. _

"Okay."

_Argh! _

He reached for the fridge handle and she moved out of his way. Instead of opening it though, he leaned against it. She faked interest in the bottle label as he watched her.

Why did he have to look so good? His jeans weren't tight fitting, but they hugged his hips and showed off his butt quite nicely Bella had noticed earlier. The shirt fit him the same way, the buttons on it disappearing into the waist band of his jeans.

_Lucky buttons._

She wondered what she would find in those jeans. Would _that_ part of him be just as impressive as the rest of him? Bella couldn't imagine anything about him being less than perfect. It would be a cruel joke if it was.

But what would it be like? Would he fill her hand, making it impossible for her to wrap it around him entirely? Would the length be just as remarkable as the width? What about when he was inside her? How far would she have to stretch to fit him?

_Advert your eyes, Swan, before he catches you. _

She looked up and saw him smiling.

Too late.

_Oh, dear God._

"You never answered my question earlier," he finally said breaking the silence.

"Which question?" She didn't look at him, but continued to play with her bottle.

"If you are involved with anyone."

"Oh." So, he was still thinking about that. Good. "You said it mattered."

"It does."

"Why?"

"I don't sleep with attached women," he said simply.

She wasn't sure how to respond to that. Mentally she did a happy dance that that's where his thoughts were at.

"But no one's sleeping with anyone," she finally said.

"Not yet."

_What are you waiting for, then?_

"Well, in that case, no I'm single." She looked at him.

He looked like he was trying to decide whether to believe her or not.

"Are you?" she asked in return.

"No."

"Not married?" She sneered, annoyed he didn't believe her.

"Never." He smiled.

That surprised her. He did have a son after all. She'd assumed there had been a wife at some point. She wanted to ask, but wasn't sure if that question was allowed yet. Was it too personal to ask someone why they hadn't married their son's mother? Considering they'd only met a few hours ago, she figured it was.

_Oh, but it's okay to have wild animal sex with him?_

"Isabella?" A thrill shot through her at the way he said her name. Normally, she didn't like to be called Isabella, but when Carlisle said it, it didn't bother her at all. Actually, she liked it. A lot. "Does it bother you that I'm eighteen years older than you?"

"No." She was lost every time she looked at him.

He took a step closer to her, his eyes burning into hers. She hadn't noticed until now just how tall he was compared to her. But then everyone was almost taller than her, except Alice. He wasn't smiling, just staring at her intently.

He took her hands in his and slowly dragged his fingertips up her arms. Goosebumps rose on her skin and her nipples tightened at the slight touch. Her breathing became shallow. Her heart pounded.

He traced his fingers along her shoulders, slipping them beneath the thin straps of her shirt. She thought he'd pull them down, but instead he held them between his fingers.

The blush she felt taking over her skin this time wasn't from embarrassment, it was from pure excitement. She hadn't moved an inch, but the ache between her legs told her she had to do something soon. She felt like she was about to explode and he'd barely touched her.

Maybe she had to make it clear what she wanted.

Inhaling deeply, she hooked her fingers into the belt loops of his jeans and gave a little tug. His nostrils flared, but he didn't move his hands, or anything else for that matter.

Instead, he said, "Tell me what you want, Isabella." His voice was thick.

She blushed and looked down. She wasn't so good with words. "What do you think I want?"

"I know what you want, but I want to hear you say it," he demanded.

_Oh, God._ She closed her eyes.

"Look at me, Isabella."

_Holy fuck, that was hot!_

She looked at him. His eyes were smouldering, they burned with desire. Knowing he wanted her just as much as she wanted him gave her the confidence she needed.

"You've been driving me crazy from the second you walked in here." She spoke slowly. "If it were possible to spontaneously combust I would have burst into flames at dinner tonight." She watched his Adam's apple move as he swallowed. "I want you, Dr. Cullen."

And that's all it took. He crushed his mouth to hers, moulding their lips together. His tongue darted out, begging entrance to her mouth. He ran the tip against her bottom lip, playing with it, until she opened up and let him in. She moaned as their tongues collided and he pulled her tighter against him.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her lips harder to his, her body closer to his body. It wasn't enough, she needed more.

He wound his arms around her waist, his hands pressed against the small of her back. She felt his cock against her stomach and even clothed she could tell she had been right. This man was very well endowed. She wiggled against him and he groaned, dropping his hands to her ass and squeezing.

She bit his lip, encouraging him to be a little rougher. He lifted her up by her bottom and she wrapped her legs around him. The position put his cock right against the place she needed him most.

Her clit throbbed as if it had a mind of its own, and she had a fleeting thought of Alice, hoping she didn't want her pants back. Bella had a feeling they'd be ruined before they were finished.

All thoughts of Alice, and the pants, vanished when Carlisle started rocking her up and down his hard length. If he felt this amazing with is clothes on, what was he going to feel like with them off? Bella shuddered at the thought and pressed harder against him.

She gasped as he set her on top of the counter and thrust against her. He moved his mouth away from hers, kissing down her neck. Bella threw her head back, granting him better access. As he nipped and sucked, his hands went under her tank top. His thumbs circled her belly button and then inched up towards her breasts. He cupped them, flicking her pebbled nipples and Bella moaned, even though the touch was almost painful.

"Oh, my God please, Carlisle," she panted.

Hearing his name on her lips, pleading like that, went straight to his dick. He dropped his mouth to her chest and sucked on her nipple through the thin material of her shirt. She bucked beneath him, grabbing fistfuls of his hair and pulled him closer.

"Isabella," he moaned her name between her breasts. "I need…. I want you…"

"Me, too," she whispered placing her hands gently on his face, looking into his eyes.

He leaned into kiss her, but when she reached for his shirt he stopped her.

"We can't," he said faintly. Bella was sure she'd heard him wrong. He laid his forehead on hers. "Your father and Esme are right upstairs. They could come down at any moment."

"Charlie sleeps through the night," Bella assured him reaching for him again.

He groaned. "Don't make this any harder than it already is, Isabella."

She grinned wickedly. "Can it get any harder?" She stroked the bulge beneath his fly.

Carlisle half groaned, half laughed and grabbed her hands. He brought them to his lips and kissed her fingers. "There is nothing I want more than to strip you naked and have my way with you."

"Then do it!"

He sighed. "Not tonight. We can't risk it."

"But it was okay to feel me up right across from my father this evening?" she snapped pulling her hands away.

He said nothing, just continued to look at her. He helped her down from the counter and she avoided looking at him, afraid the tears she held back might break free.

"Look at me, Isabella," he said quietly. When she didn't, he put a finger under her chin and lifted her face to his. "This will happen," he promised brushing a stray hair from her eyes.

She sucked in a breath and smirked. "Yeah, maybe next time you won't get performance anxiety. Good night, Carlisle."


	4. Bliss

_**As always, SM is the godess of Twilight and owns everything. **_

Bella had a restless night.

Alice had been waiting up for her when she'd returned to the room. She must have had a million questions ready to bomb her with, but one look at Bella's face told her now was not the time.

Bella had crawled into bed, pulled the covers over her head, and wished the whole night away.

She felt so rejected. She knew he wanted her. She'd _felt_ how much he wanted her. So, why had he stopped? She didn't believe for one minute he was actually afraid of being caught.

Why did he have second thoughts?

Was she too enthusiastic? Not enthusiastic enough? Did her nipples look funny? No, he hadn't seen her nipples. Well, then did they feel funny? She always thought she had pretty normal nipples. They weren't huge, or a funny color, or turned inwards. They may not be attached to very large breasts, but at least they were real.

_Argh, this had nothing to do with nipples._

She fell asleep thinking about it and when she woke up she was still thinking about it. How was she going to face him this morning?

Maybe she could fake being sick and stay in bed all day. Alice could go with Esme to do the wedding errands. She'd be better than Bella at it, anyway. Alice was so perky, so excited and welcoming to the idea of marriage. She was perfect bridesmaid material.

She'd fake some serious illness, stay in bed for the rest of the trip and avoid him.

Stupid sexy doctor making her miss her father's wedding.

_Doctor. _

Right. He was a doctor, which meant she couldn't fake anything because he'd be up here checking on her.

_Stupid sexy doctor._

"Are we going to talk about it?" Alice asked.

Bella peeked at her from under her pillow and shook her head. "No."

"Was it that horrible?"

"Yes."

"What happened?"

"We were in the kitchen and…." She glared at Alice. "I said we weren't going to talk about it."

"You know we are." Alice took the pillow away from her. "So, stop being stubborn and spill."

Bella remained silent.

"Fine." Alice stood and walked to the door. "If you prefer to go downstairs and face him without a game plan be my guest."

"We almost had sex in the kitchen," Bella blurted.

Alice was back on the bed faster than she could blink. "And?" she asked impatiently.

"And…. Oh, Alice," she moaned covering her face. "I have never been as turned on as I was last night." She dropped her hands and looked at Alice. "We were so hot, or at least I thought we were. One minute we were kissing, the next I had my legs around him-"

"Oh!"

"-he had me on the counter, his hands under my shirt and then he stopped."

"What do you mean he stopped?"

"He stopped. Nada. Nothing. No more."

"Yeah, yeah." Alice waved her hands around. "Why did he stop?"

"He said he didn't want to risk being caught," Bella muttered bitterly.

"Oh. Well, you can't really blame him." Bella glared. "Think about it. Would you want your dad walking in on that?"

"Well, no." She picked at her blanket hating to admit Alice was right. "Why start something if you have no intention of finishing."

"Uh, because he's a guy and listens to the head below the waist."

Bella snickered.

"Speaking of which, how is that head?" Alice wiggled her eyes mischievously.

Bella blushed. "Huge. Of course he was still in his clothes, so I could be wrong. He might be enormous."

Alice snorted and asked, "How did you leave things last night?"

Bella stopped smiling. "Oh. Um…."

"What?" Alice looked like she was holding her breath.

"Well, I, um, may have…insulted him," Bella mumbled.

"Bella? What did you do to the hot doctor?" she asked slowly.

Bella inhaled. "." She spoke quickly, jumbling the words together.

Alice's eyes were wide. "You what?"

"I was upset!" Bella defended herself. "I didn't think about what I was saying, I just said it and walked away. I felt proud of myself after, but now I feel a little guilty."

"You told him he had performance anxiety…and then left?"

Bella nodded.

"Oh!" Alice threw her arms around her. "Bella Swan I never thought you had the balls to say something like that! I'm so proud of you!"

Bella was shocked. "You are?"

"Yes!" Alice pulled back to look at her. "It was definitely a blow to his ego, but you finally said what was on your mind." Alice beamed and then added seriously, "I sometimes felt like you let James walk all over you. You had him on this high pedestal and he didn't deserve that kind of devotion."

Bella agreed. She had let James make all the decisions for them, control too many things, all because she felt lucky that someone like him wanted someone like her. He took advantage of that and she let him.

"Do you think that's why he did it?" Bella asked softly. "I let him get away with everything, maybe he thought cheating would be another thing I'd just forgive." Tears stung he eyes.

"But you didn't," Alice reminded her squeezing her hand.

"Yeah."

They were both silent for a while and then Alice spoke. "Okay, enough of this!" she declared. "It's called a past for a reason." She smiled.

"Right." Bella brightened a little. "So, what do I do about my present problem?"

"You act totally normal," Alice said as if it were obvious. "Act like it never happened."

"What if he brings it up?"

"Charlie and Esme are down there, right? I don't think it'll be breakfast conversation."

Bella felt relieved. She should have known talking to Alice would help.

Alice patted her leg. "Let's get some breakfast." She stood and looked at Bella. "And you can keep those pajamas," she added smirking.

Bella slowly followed Alice downstairs. She paused on the last step and Alice reached for her hand giving it a squeeze.

This was stupid. After all this was her home. She wasn't going to feel uncomfortable in her father's house. If anyone should feel awkward it should be him.

Feeling slightly encouraged from her pep talk, she walked into the kitchen with her head held high and-

Tripped over her feet.

She closed her eyes not wanting to witness when the floor met her face and prepared for a broken nose. Or, at the very least a split lip or chipped tooth.

Before any damage could be done, two strong hands reached out and caught her. She didn't have to open her eyes to know whose arms she was in.

"Are you okay?" Carlisle asked helping her to her feet.

She nodded, her face flaming. Bella was positive the Gods must have put her on this earth for their own amusement. Why else did things like this keep happening to her?

"I'm fine." She allowed herself on quick glance at him. "Thank you."

"Do you always make such a grand entrance, Bella?" he teased stepping away from her.

_Bella? What happened to Isabella?_

She bristled at his question. "No, sometimes I fall down the stairs just to announce myself," she snapped.

Alice and Esme laughed.

Charlie sighed. "Its really not funny. She's probably been to the hospital more times than everyone in Forks combined."

_Thanks, Dad._

"Renee and I were sure we'd have to put her in a bubble when she was a kid."

Carlisle laughed softly. Bella glared at both of them.

"Okay, enough. It's only seven-thirty; I don't think my ego can take much more bruising."

"Sorry, kid," Charlie apologized sheepishly.

Esme handed her a plate of French toast, she thanked her and sat by Alice, directly across from Carlisle. Even though she tried to ignore him, she could feel his eyes on her.

"Will you be back in time for dinner, Carlisle?" Esme asked sitting next to Charlie obviously caring on a conversation from earlier.

"I'm not sure. Better not count on me being here just in case."

"Where are you going?" The words were out of Bella's mouth before she could stop them.

_So much for ignoring him._

She stuffed her mouth with toast to keep any more questions from popping out.

"I'm looking at a house in Seattle," he said. "I was offered a position there, so I'm relocating."

"Wha yer ew ow?"

_Oh. Dear. God._

She had not just done that. Even a full mouth couldn't stop her from talking.

Alice coughed, chocking on her juice. Bella caught the "shut up" look she threw her way.

"Sorry, I missed that. I think your food got in the way," Carlisle told her.

Bella threw daggers in his direction and swallowed. "Where are you now?"

"L.A." Their eyes locked. Bella was the first to look away.

"Well, I'm off," Charlie declared. He kissed Esme and grabbed his jacket. "You girls have fun today."

"I should go, too." Carlisle took one last sip of coffee and stood.

"Bella, why don't you go get ready," Alice suggested. "I'll help Esme with the dishes."

The idea of a hot shower to help clear her mind sounded good. She grabbed her toiletry bag and some clothes and made her way to the bathroom.

She was just about to close the door when something blocked it. She saw his foot first. Her eyes traveled up his leg, over his stomach and chest and finally landed on his face. His eyes were brooding, which should have concerned her, but she instantly felt turned on.

Was there anything about this man that didn't make her horny?

_No._

"What do you want?" she demanded.

"Performance anxiety?" he growled.

Bella bit her lip to keep from smiling and shrugged. "It's the only reason I can think of."

"What about the one I gave you?"

"Please. If you were so worried about being caught you wouldn't be up here right now."

Carlisle looked over his shoulder and then pushed his way into the bathroom.

"Hey!" Bella protested as he closed the door. "I didn't invite you in here."

"Fine, you win. Charlie and Esme were not the only reason."

Bella crossed her arms, raised an eyebrow and waited. She thought she detected a faint pink in his cheeks.

He ran his hand through his hair and sighed. "I didn't have any protection."

The answer took her by such surprise, she burst out laughing. She covered her mouth to keep quiet, but the look on his face sent her into another round of giggles.

"What's so funny?"

"It's just…you… protection." She laughed through the sentence. "I'm sorry." She took a deep breath to stop the giggles. "That's really why?"

"Yes."

"Well, you could have thought about that before you kissed me."

"I should have, but you're a problem, Isabella. Whenever I'm around you I can't think straight. All I can think about is you naked." He smiled.

Her heart soared.

_No, stay strong! Don't give in._

"Still, you weren't the one left frustrated and unable to sleep."

"I wasn't?" He leaned in and put his hands on the sink behind her, trapping her between his arms. "You have no idea of the fantasies I had about you last night. The way you moaned my name stayed with me all night," he whispered.

Bella's breathing hitched.

"If I had been able to pick my jaw up off the floor last night after your little remark, I would have showed you just how wrong you were, Isabella."

_Please, show me now._

He moved his body closer and Bella felt his growing erection against her leg.

"Can you feel what you do to me?" he asked his lips on her ear.

She shivered.

"If only you knew what I was thinking right now." He kissed her just below her lobe, his tongue snaking along her ear.

She gasped. "Tell me."

"I want to turn you around so you're facing the mirror and take you from behind so you can watch."

_Ohmygod! _

"Or in the shower against the wall, with water streaming down your body."

"Carlisle," she whimpered.

He chuckled and pulled away. "Think about that all day, Isabella and you'll feel half the frustration I did last night."

"Like I needed anymore," she grumbled. "Why do you do that?"

He grinned. "Because it's hot when you're turned on."

She rolled her eyes. "Not that. Why do you call me Bella when we're around other people, but Isabella when we're alone?"

He laid his hand on her cheek and softly smiled at her. "When we're with other people you're Charlie's daughter, but when we're alone you're my Isabella."

_Aaaaand swoon. _

"I'll see you later." He kissed her and left.

Bella had to force herself to move. She showered in record time, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt and bounded downstairs.

"What took you so long?" Alice demanded. Bella noticed Esme wasn't there. "She left to talk to the caterers. She said she'd meet us at the fitting." Alice looked at her, waiting for an explanation to her tardiness.

"Just lost track of time I guess. Sorry."

"Well, let's go." Alice threw her jacket at her. "I can't wait to see the dresses Esme has picked out. She has such great taste for decorating, I'm sure she's has something fabulous."

"Yeah, fabulous," Bella agreed wondering how Carlisle had managed to sneak out without being seen.

"Hello? Bella?"

"Sorry, what?"

"I asked if you knew were the store is. Esme mentioned its new." Alice snapped her belt in place as Bella backed out of the driveway.

"No, but I'm sure it won't be hard to find," she said turning onto the street towards town.

"_Think about that all day, Isabella and you'll feel half the frustration I did last night."_

"Bella?"

"_When we're alone you're my Isabella."_

"Bella!" Alice screamed.

"What?" She jumped.

"You just ran the red light!"

"I did?" Bella turned around to look.

"Don't look behind you!" Alice screeched. "Jesus, are you trying to kill us? What is with you?"

"Nothing. Look, there's the shop," she said hoping to distract Alice.

It worked. Bella had barely stopped the car, before Alice was jumping out. Esme was waiting for them

"Sorry we're late," Bella apologized. "It's my fault."

Esme smiled. "I just got here, too."

The sales lady recognized Esme as soon as they walked in. They were ushered to the back, while the woman gushed about the dresses. Bella prayed there were no ruffles, or bows, or pink.

_Please, don't let it be pink._

When it was brought out, Bella was pleasantly surprised. No ruffles, no bows, or lace. Just a simple strapless satin dress. Bella would have said the color was beige, but Alice corrected her and told her it was champagne.

"I hope you don't mind the color," Esme said.

"No, it's a great color," Bella assured her.

"So, you like it?"

"Yes."

Esme let out a huge sigh and laughed. "Good. I was a little worried."

"Can we see your dress now, Esme?" Alice asked bursting with excitement.

When Esme came out wearing her dress, Bella thought she might have to pick Alice up off the floor.

"Esme, it's gorgeous! You're gorgeous!" Alice gushed.

"Really?" Esme looked down at herself. "I'm not too old for it?"

"No!" Alice was startled at the thought.

"You do look beautiful, Esme," Bella said, but she didn't understand all hype about the dress.

She saw a plain white dress. Alice, on the other hand, saw a floor-length, white strapless dress, with a beaded metallic lace bodice, an empire waist and a sweep train. Bella was almost positive they'd have to pry her away from it when it was time to go.

The seamstress had her put on the bridesmaid dress and after a few changes, told her the waist would need to be taken in a bit and the length was a little long. It should have been above her knees, but that was easily fixed.

The next task was the cake. Esme couldn't decide between a simple butter cream and a chocolate and white butter cream. Sounded pretty simple to Bella, until she tasted them.

"This is why brides starve themselves," she muttered around a mouthful of cake. "I like the chocolate and white one."

"It's not just chocolate and white," Alice said. "The first tier and third tier are made of chocolate mocha sour cream cake, iced with chocolate mocha butter cream. The second tier is butter cake iced with white butter cream."

Bella blinked at Alice and then looked at Esme. "I like the chocolate and white one."

In the end that's the one Esme chose.

"Thank you for helping me today," Esme said over lunch. "I know it's not your favorite thing to do, Bella."

She shrugged. "It wasn't so bad. I'm glad we could help."

"Me, too!" Alice agreed. "Now, we just have to plan our night out." She grinned.

"Really, we don't have to do anything. I think I'm past the age for bachelorette parties, anyway. You two should go out, though. Have some fun."

"Are you sure?" Alice asked.

"Positive."

"Well, Bella and I were going to do some shopping," Alice said. "Want to make a night of it, Bella? Do some shopping, grab some dinner and drinks?" Alice winked.

_Ugh. _Bella knew that wink. Drinks meant a club. A club meant men. Alice was on the prowl.

"If you want." The response lacked enthusiasm.

"Great!"

They soon said good-bye to Esme and left for Port Angeles. Alice was giddy with excitement the entire way there and wouldn't stop chattering.

"Are you even listening to me, Bella?" she finally asked.

"Not really, but that's never stopped you before from talking." She grinned.

"Okay, you've been more than a little distracted since this morning. What's up?" She turned in her seat to face her.

"I'm just tired. I didn't sleep very well last night," Bella reminded her.

Alice watched her. "No, there's something more."

Bella sighed. "Really Alice, isn't it enough to torture me with shopping and dancing for one night."

Alice huffed and sat back in her seat. "Fine."

She immediately perked up when they got to the mall. She instantly dragged Bella to the lingerie section.

"Seriously? Lingerie? I'm not parading myself around in sexy clothes in my father's house, Alice," Bella cried.

Alice pouted.

"Don't look at me like that. I'll get some of those pajama pants and shirts, but that's all."

"What about sexy panties?" Alice teased holding up a pair that Bella was sure could be used as an eye patch.

"I'm capable of picking out my own underwear, thank you."

Alice sighed heavily. "Bella, you really are no fun at this."

Bella glared and marched over to the sleepwear. She plucked a few pairs off the rack - black, blue and green, no pastels for her, thank you very much - and turned back to Alice.

"I'm done."

Alice clicked her tongue clearly aggravated.

"Bella."

"Alice."

"Fine, don't listen to me and get what you want," she snapped and then she smiled that mischievous pixie smile. "I'm picking out your outfit for tonight, though."

Bella groaned. She should just accept that no one wins against Alice.

As payback for not getting the lingerie, Alice had her try on at least a dozen skirts and dresses. Bella was tempted to throw the pajamas back and let her choose just to get it over with.

After the sixteenth change, Bella put her foot down.

"That's enough, Alice. I refuse to put on one more skirt. Do you even remember anything you've seen?"

"Of course I do," Alice said picking up one of the outfits. "I've had this one picked out from the start. I just wanted to see if there was anything better." She smiled.

_The irritating little fairy. _

Bella said nothing as she yanked the clothes out of Alice's hand. It was a black halter dress with what looked like Native American beading under the bust. The same design was printed below the waist.

"Put it on right away so we don't have to change at the restaurant," Alice instructed.

Bella slowly changed into the dress surprised that she actually like it. It was a little shorter than she would have worn, at least two inches above the knee, but as long as she didn't bend over she'd be fine.

Alice knocked on the door. "I got you some shoes, too." She pushed a pair of strappy black sandals under the door.

Bella jammed her foot into them, grumbling about the height of the heel and opened the door.

Alice whistled. "Wow, you're hot, Bella!"

"Really?" She looked down too fast and teetered on the shoes.

"Just be sure not to trip or spill anything and it'll remain hot," Alice said.

Bella stuck her tongue out at her.

They paid for their purchases and then had dinner at a small Italian restaurant. Alice asked the waitress if there were any good clubs around.

"Bliss just opened!" she told them. "It's awesome!"

Bliss was located just on the outskirts of the city. Bella could hear the music pounding through the walls from the car. Inside, disco lights lit up the dance floor and every few minutes fog filled the room. There was also a live DJ.

Bella was in her own personal hell.

"This is where you want to be?" She had to yell over the music.

"Let's get a drink and give it a chance," Alice yelled back.

Meaning, if she didn't find any eye candy they'd leave.

Bella repressed a sigh and followed Alice to the bar.

"Two shots of tequila and two beers," she told the bartender.

No, she must have heard her wrong. Alice wouldn't give her tequila. Not after the last time.

"Here." She thrust the shot at her and clinked glasses.

Bella threw it back and coughed.

Yep, definitely tequila.

"Alice," Bella said warning her when another glass of the clear liquid was placed in her hand.

"It's just to relax you, Bella. You need it."

Bella took the shot and swallowed. Three more, along with her beer, followed. By the time they left the bar to find a seat, Bella was more than relaxed.

"I don't want to sit," she told Alice. "Let's dance."

"Bella Swan wants to dance?" Alice laughed.

"Yes, Bella Swan does."

"I'll dance with you, sweetheart if you want."

She hadn't noticed the guys Alice was talking to. The one that had spoken was looking Bella up and down, almost drooling. She looked at Alice, who shrugged, and then back at Caption Drools. He looked harmless enough.

"I feel it's only fair to warn you I'm not very good," she told him almost hoping he'd decline his offer.

He stood and smiled. "Maybe I can teach you a few things, then."

He took her hand and led her to the dance floor. He immediately started grinding to the music, holding her too close. His arms were locked around her waist, his pelvis thrusting against hers to the beat.

This wasn't what she wanted.

She pushed against his chest needing some space.

"I thought you wanted to dance," he said pulling her closer.

"I changed my mind." She pushed harder this time. "I have to find my friend."

He laughed. "Your friend is busy. Finish the dance, honey."

"I said let me go." Bella stomped the heel of her shoe onto his foot.

He yelped and jumped back. He held his foot and glared at her. "You're one crazy bitch, you know that."

Bella spun around to find Alice and slammed into someone.

"Sorry," she muttered not looking up.

"Here I thought I'd have to rescue you." Bella snapped her head up at the voice. Carlisle grinned down at her. "You ruined my knight in shining armour moment."

She smiled, happier than she should be to see him.

"I'm a constant damsel in distress. I'm sure you'll get another chance," she said. "What are you doing here?"

"Esme said you and Alice went clubbing. I heard this was new and figured it would be your first stop."

"That doesn't answer what you're doing here."

"This." He pulled her into his arms and kissed her.

Somewhere in the back of her mind it registered that they were in the middle of a crowded dance floor. Everyone could see them. They shouldn't be doing this here.

And then his tongue was on hers and she didn't care. She put her hands on the back of his neck and pulled him closer. He moaned and started moving their bodies. It took Bella a minute to realize they were dancing. Akon's _I Wanna Make Love _played in the background.

He put his hands on her hips and swayed to the music, never breaking their kiss. His hips bumped hers, nudging her legs apart until he was grinding against her. Not in the creepy, disgusting way of her previous partner. Carlisle was slow, sexy and seductive.

She didn't care that her dress was bunching around the top of her thighs as long as he didn't stop what he was doing. Right then, Carlisle rotated his hips and made direct contact with her clit.

She gasped against his mouth and she felt him smile. He twisted his hips in the opposite direction and did it again.

Bella was digging her fingers into his shoulders, needing something to hang onto to keep from melting into a puddle at his feet. He grabbed her just under her ass, lifting her slightly off the ground and thrust up.

And that's all it took…

Color that had nothing to do with the lights surrounding them burst behind her eyelids. She cried into his mouth, her body convulsed, her hips jerking against his. She was panting and as he pulled her even closer to himself, she heard his laboured breathing.

"Let's get out of here," he whispered into her ear.

She nodded and he carefully set her back on her trembling legs. He grabbed her hand and led her towards the exit.

Outside the music still rang in her ears. Carlisle suddenly pulled her around a dark corner, pinning her against the building and claimed her mouth once again.

"I can't wait." His hands were under her skirt, kneading her flesh. She mentally thanked Alice for convincing her at the last minute to trade her bikini panties for a thong. The feel of his hands on her bare skin was incredible.

"Isabella, if you want me to stop you have to tell me now," he moaned.

His fingers were inches away from her drenched center.

"Isabella?"

She reached for the button on his fly and said, "Don't stop."

At the same time she unzipped him, he plunged his fingers inside her.

"Oh! Yes!" she moaned.

"Fuck," he groaned. "You're so wet."

He slipped another finger in and Bella bucked beneath him.

"Please," she begged. "Carlisle, please…"

He worked his thumb against her clit, rubbing it back and forth until she came again, crying out his name.

She heard him fumble with his pants and the ripping of a foil packet. She smiled, remembering their conversation that morning.

His hands where back under her skirt and the ripping of her thong seemed to echo in the night.

_Holy, shit! _He just ripped her clothes off her!

Before she had time to react to that, he lifted her into his arms. She needed something, something she hadn't gotten a chance to do last night.

She reached between them and wrapped her hand around his cock.

He _was_ huge!

Her hand barely wrapped around him. He throbbed in her grip as she stroked him and he groaned.

"Isabella," he gasped.

She smiled and stroked him harder, wishing the condom wasn't on so she could feel his naked skin.

"Enough," he demanded roughly.

He supported her against the wall and positioned his cock against her opening. He paused long enough to look into her eyes, before thrusting inside her.

"Ahh! Carlisle," Bella sobbed.

He stretched her, filling her more than she thought possible. She wrapped her legs around him, causing him to slip deeper inside.

"Christ, Isabella," he groaned. He held her like that, giving her a chance to adjust to his size.

He pulled out and thrust back in slowly. Bella moaned. He did it again, a little harder.

"Yes, like that," she sighed. "Just like that!" She braced her hands on his shoulders.

"Uh, shit," Carlisle grunted. He started moving faster, harder, pushing Bella into the wall with each thrust.

And then he wasn't just thrusting anymore, he was moving his hips in that circler motion again.

"Holy, shit! Carlisle!" She felt ready to explode again.

"Isabella, the next time you come it's going to be around my cock."

_Oh, my fucking, God!_

Dirty talking Carlisle was hot!

He leaned forward and flicked his tongue over her nipple through her dress. She tensed and he whispered, "Come for me, my Isabella."

And she did. Harder than she had the first two times. She felt herself spasm around his cock, clenching around him.

"Carlisle!" she screamed not caring if they were heard.

"Yes," he grunted no longer just thrusting, but pounding into her.

He groaned as his climax took over him. He kissed her with more passion than before. His tongue assaulted hers, his teeth pulled at her lips, until his moment of ecstasy was over. He kissed her softly then, but kept her close.

She felt her heart give a tug at the thought of this ending.


	5. Busted

_**Guess what? Yeah, SM still owns it all. **_

"Are you okay?" Carlisle asked adjusting his pants back into place.

Bella laughed. "More than okay."

When she moved away from the wall however, she grimaced.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Bella said quickly.

"Your back," Carlisle observed. "Jesus, Bella, I didn't even think about it."

"I'm fine," she assured him. She picked up what was left of her thong. "Can't say the same for these, though." She dangled them off her finger.

Carlisle softly chuckled. "I'm sorry. I'll replace them."

Bella laughed. "Don't bother. They're uncomfortable, anyway."

"I like the thought of you naked under that dress," he murmured nuzzling her neck.

"Mmm, I wonder why that is," she teased.

"It's a guy thing." He nibbled along her jaw.

"Carlisle?"

"Hmm?"

"You really shouldn't do that unless you plan to go for round two right here."

He laughed. "That's probably not a good idea. Your back wouldn't be able to take another round against that wall, anyway."

"There are other positions," Bella said running her hands down his back to his ass.

Carlisle groaned. "Don't start, Isabella. Besides, I'm sure Alice is wondering where you went."

"Alice!" Bella had completely forgotten about her. "I need to find her."

She pulled out of his embrace, but he grabbed her hand to stop her from walking away.

"Is she okay to drive home?" Carlisle asked.

Bella was puzzled. "Why?"

"I just thought you might want to ride back with me."

Her heart pitter-pattered at the idea.

_It was just a ride home for crying out loud. _

"Let me find her. I'll meet you out front."

Bella didn't have to look far. Just as she was about to enter the club Alice walked out.

"There you are!" Alice cried looking relieved. "I thought that creep made off with your body. Where've you been?"

Carlisle walked up behind her just then. Alice looked from Bella to him and then back at Bella.

She smiled. "Oh, I see."

"Are you okay to dive home?" Bella asked, before Alice could say anything to embarrass her.

Her eyes lit up with understanding. "Oh, yeah. I'm great to get back."

"Are you sure?"

Alice held out her hands for the keys. "I only had two shots and a beer and that was awhile ago. I'm fine."

"Well, I wouldn't want anything to happen to my car," Bella joked handing over the keys.

"Ha ha. Will you even make it back to Charlie's tonight?" Alice asked grinning.

"Where else are we going to end up in Forks?"

Alice laughed. "You never know." She turned towards the parking lot.

"I'll see you later," Bella called.

Alice waved once and was gone.

Carlisle wrapped an arm around her waist and steered her to his car.

"Are you sure she's okay?" he asked again.

"She's fine. I wouldn't have let her go if I thought otherwise."

They stopped beside the black Mercedes and Carlisle unlocked the passenger door. He turned to her before opening the door and kissed her.

"I wish I could spend the night with you," he said.

The comment caught Bella off guard. The butterflies started dancing in her stomach again.

"In my room or on the couch?" she asked trying to keeps things light.

Carlisle snickered. "Yes, being in Charlie's house does have disadvantages." He opened the door for her and Bella slipped in.

Except for the soft jazz that played, the car was filled with silence. Carlisle reached over and took her hand, but made no attempt at conversation.

Bella stared at their joined hands. His fingers were longer than hers, she was sure if they were palm to palm the tips of hers would just meet his second knuckle. His hands were smooth, but not delicate. She tried to picture him in surgery. These hands that had moments ago touch her and brought her to such sweet release also saved lives.

The thought gave her chills.

"Are you cold?" Carlisle asked turning the heat on low.

"No, I'm fine."

They lapsed back into their comfortable silence.

She wondered how many other women had had the privilege of experiencing Dr. Cullen's magic touch. After all he was good looking - more than anybody had the right to be - he was single, a doctor, probably rich, too. He was fun and interesting, funny and had to be smart to be a surgeon. Women must be throwing themselves at him all the time.

She felt a pang of jealousy.

_Whoa, where'd that come from?_

She had no claim to him. They weren't a couple. They hardly even knew each other. She should not be feeling jealous over women who may, or may not exist in his life.

She looked down at their hands again. This felt nice, though. Comfortable. It almost felt…right.

"Isabella?"

"Hmm?"

"What are you thinking?"

_Oh, just that holding your hand makes me feel whole._

God, what was wrong with her?

"Hey." He squeezed her hand. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." She pulled her hand away and turned the heat off. "I'm warm now. Thanks." She smiled.

He looked surprised when she didn't return her hand to his, but made no comment.

"How as Seattle?" she asked after a few minutes.

"Good. I made an offer on the house, so hopefully I'll hear something soon."

"What about your place in L.A.?"

"It's an apartment." He smiled. "I figured it was time to grow up and stop renting."

"Yeah, that Peter Pan mentality wears off after awhile."

He was silent and then asked, "Isabella, what's really on your mind?" He glanced at her.

"I'm just trying to make conversation."

"Okay, can I ask you something then?"

"Sure."

"How do you think Charlie would react to us?"

_Us?_

She liked the sound of that more than she should, too.

But why was he asking that? He wouldn't actually tell Charlie, would he? What would the point of that be?

Unless he liked the idea of being target practise.

"I don't know. He's never had to deal with me dating. Not that we're dating," she added quickly.

_Smooth._

"I just meant that my love life has never included my father."

_Wait, that didn't sound right at all!_

"I mean…."

Carlisle chuckled.

She took a deep breath and tried again. "Charlie never met the guy I dated, so having to deal with me and men is uncharted territory."

_There that was better._

"_The _guy?"

_Or not._

"As in one?" Carlisle's voice was full of disbelief.

"Well, there was the typical three week high school romances, but for the most part, yeah one guy."

"How long did this one guy last?" he asked cautiously.

"Five years," Bella muttered. This was not a conversation she wanted to have with him. Not tonight. Not after what they'd just shared.

He was silent.

_Oh, this can't be good._

She waited giving him a chance to speak first.

_One, two, three…._

When she reached fifty and he still hadn't said anything she began to panic. But when he was still silent at a hundred she felt like she was going to throw up.

_Breathe, Bella._

"What's wrong?" Her voiced cracked.

He looked straight ahead at the road while answering, "I'm just trying to imagine what that must be like."

"What do you mean?"

"You're not very old, Isabella," he said softly. "To commit yourself to someone at such a young age for so long…. Well, I can only imagine what that's like." He sounded wistful.

It was her turn to be silent. She had no idea how to respond to that. She was also a little confused and very curious.

It sounded like he had never been in a long term relationship, at least not one at her age. But he had a son who was twenty, making him twenty-one when he was born. Bella wondered what the circumstances were that brought that baby into his life. Obviously it couldn't have been planned if he'd never been with anyone seriously.

Was his son the result of a one night stand? An accident with a casual girlfriend?

"You're very quiet," Carlisle said interrupting her thoughts.

She shrugged. "I was just thinking about what you said."

"What about it?"

"It's just…." _You have a kid and you make it sound like you've never been committed. What's that about? _"You make it sound like a bad thing," she said instead chickening out.

"Not at all," he disagreed. "As long as it was good for you that's all that matters." He paused. "Was it good for you?"

"I thought it was."

"So, what happened? Who ended it?"

She snorted. "That depends on how you look at it."

"How do _you_ look at it?" he questioned.

She'd never been asked that before. She had to think about it before answering.

"I guess he ended it," she finally said. "But I'm the one who walked away."

"How does that work?" He sounded confused.

_Oh, why not. _

"The minute he decided to cheat it was over, but I decided to walk away after finding them together. He probably would have stayed if I forgave him," she added sourly.

"I'm sorry."

Her laugh was bitter. "For what?"

"For bringing this up. I'm sure it's not something you like to think about, much less talk about."

He took her hand and she resisted the urge to pull it away.

Now was her chance to ask something just as personal. She looked at the clock and saw they only had twenty minutes before reaching Forks.

_Do it._

"I think we got side tracked," Carlisle said before she could say anything. "We were talking about Charlie's reaction."

Bella's sigh was out of frustration because she really didn't know what Charlie would do and annoyance at herself for not speaking up.

"If I had a daughter and she told me she was with someone my age I think I'd have a problem with it," he said thoughtfully.

The admission made Bella's heart sink.

"What if he was a good guy who made her happy and feel alive?" she asked softly looking down at her hands.

He was quiet, before finally saying, "I guess I'd have to take that into consideration."

"If you're that worried about Charlie do you want to stop this?" She forced herself to ask.

"No." He grinned at her. "I just think we should keep it to ourselves."

_Phew!_ She could breathe normally again.

Bella nodded. "Agreed. How do you think Esme would take it, though? You know her better than I do obviously. Do you think she'd be upset?"

He hesitated.

"Esme is the most understanding and generous person I know. She's helped me out a lot in the past and never made any judgements."

_What did that mean?_

"But would she condone this?" he thought out loud and shook his head. "I'm not so sure."

Neither one of them said anything for the rest of the ride and all too soon they were pulling into Charlie's driveway.

Carlisle shut the car off and laughed.

"What?" Bella asked, amused.

"I feel like a teenager again bringing you home from a date."

"Oh." She smiled.

He leaned over the center console towards her. "You know how those dates end, right?"

"No, maybe you should show me."

He cupped her face and kissed her slowly.

"I can't seem to get enough of you, Isabella," he murmured against her lips. "I want to spend the entire night with you exploring your body." He kissed her once more and then pulled back.

Bella sighed as she opened the door. The interior light came on as she turned to get out and she heard Carlisle's sharp inhale.

"What?" she asked concerned.

"Your back." He reached out and gently ran a finger over it.

She twisted her head, trying to see what he did. "What's wrong with it?"

"You're covered in scratches." He sounded angry.

"Really?" She frowned. "I don't feel anything."

"I hurt you," he said, appalled.

She turned to face him. "Do you hear me complaining? Trust me, a few marks was worth it." She smiled. "And in the words of Lady Gaga 'if it's not rough it isn't fun'."

He shook his head, but a smile pulled at the corner of his mouth.

"You're something else, Isabella Swan."

She swallowed over the lump in her throat and got out of the car.

No one thought to leave the lights on and she ended up dropping her key while trying to unlock the door. Without thinking, she bent down to pick it up and heard Carlisle groan behind her.

"Isabella, you shouldn't have done that," he growled.

_Done wh-_

_Oh. _

She'd bent over in her skirt. With no panties on.

_Oh!_

She stood up and unlocked the door, before turning back to look at him.

"See something you like, Dr. Cullen?" she asked.

He walked up to her. "Do you have any idea how hot it is when you call me that?" He pulled her to him. "It instantly makes me hard."

Bella felt the truth of the statement on her thigh. She reached down and cupped him.

"I guess I better watch what I say then. We wouldn't want to create this problem," she rubbed her palm over the bulge, "in public."

"You're asking for trouble," he moaned.

She grinned. "I like trouble."

His eyes darkened as he pressed his mouth to hers kissing her hungrily. He reached behind her to open the door and they stumbled inside. Carlisle kicked the door closed as Bella fumbled with the buttons on his shirt. It was harder to do than she thought with her mouth busy at the same time.

He walked her backwards and the back of her knees hit the arm of the couch. Carlisle put one hand on the back of it to support them and slowly lowered Bella down. Only when her back hit the cushions did she break the kiss to scoot farther down to make room for him.

He leaned over her. His shirt was halfway unbuttoned and what she could see of his chest made her mouth dry.

She reached for him, needing to know if his skin was as smooth as it looked. She ran her hands over his hairless chest feeling his pecks and down his stomach where her fingers brushed a narrow trail of hair.

She almost died. She loved treasure trails.

He fit himself between her legs, pressing his restricted cock against her swollen flesh. She moaned and arched her back. She tried twisting her body to feel him better, but the move knocked her leg against his arm making him lose his balance. His other hand slipped off the side of the couch and before she could stop it Carlisle had tumbled to the floor bringing her along with him.

He landed on his back and she landed on top of him.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" she asked mortified scrambling to sit up.

His body shook with laughter. Unable to speak, he just nodded while she sat there utterly embarrassed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to knock you off. I-"

The lights turned on just then.

Bella whipped her head around.

"Bella? Carlisle!"

_Oh, no! This was not happening. _


	6. Damaged Man

_**Still don't own it. **_

"What's going on?" Charlie asked in his cop voice. "We heard the door slam and then there was a thump," he said looking around as if he expected someone to pop out from behind the furniture. He looked down at Bella and Carlisle. "Why are you on the floor?"

"Um…we…I…" Bella stammered waving her arms between herself and Carlisle who sat up.

She looked at him for help and even though he wasn't smiling, he still looked amused. Bella noticed Esme standing behind Charlie, accusation burning in her eyes as she stared at Carlisle.

"Well?" Charlie asked impatiently.

"I lost my contact and Carlisle was helping me look for it," Bella said.

_Oh, yeah, that__'__s believable. _

"You don't wear glasses," Charlie pointed out.

"Color contacts," Bella added quickly. "Alice thought they'd be fun to try and if I don't find it she's going to kill me." Her voice almost had a high, piercing ring to it by now.

"What was the thump?" Charlie asked thoughtfully.

_Think!_

"I'm afraid that was me," Carlisle said finally speaking. "I tripped over Bella when I came in."

"Oh." Charlie looked satisfied with the explanation. After all, wherever Bella was accidents were bound to happen. "Okay, well, if everything's fine I'm going back to bed." He turned to go back upstairs, muttering about the things women do to their bodies.

Esme continued to examine them, finally saying, "Funny, both your eyes are brown, Bella. You must have lost both contacts."

"Oh, I…."

"You might have had better luck finding it if the lights had been on," she commented, before going back upstairs.

_Oh, yeah they were totally busted._

Bella waited until she heard the bedroom door close to throw her face in her hands and moan. "I can't believe this," she muttered.

"Well, you did say you liked trouble," Carlisle reminded her laughing.

She glared at his smiling face. "Esme doesn't believe us."

"Not a chance. I'm surprised Charlie swallowed that terrible lie so well. Where's that cop intuition he's supposed to have?" Carlisle teased.

Bella shook her head. "You should feel lucky he bought it, or else Esme and I would be covering up a murder right now."

Carlisle laughed.

"I suppose I should go upstairs," Bella sighed.

Carlisle nodded, making no attempt to get off the floor.

"Well…night."

_I guess._

She walked to the stairs, confused about his behaviour.

"Isabella?" he called when she was a few steps up. She turned. "Good night." He smiled the smile that makes her insides melt.

The next morning, Bella quietly got out of bed while Alice was asleep. She grabbed some clothes and escaped to the bathroom so that she wouldn't have to face a firing squad of questions if she woke Alice up.

As she pulled her shirt over her head, she felt the effects of last night. She was sore and when she turned her back to the mirror, she saw it was still fairly red. The skin had even been scrapped off in a couple of places.

Still, she couldn't feel too bad. Her heart fluttered at the memory of Carlisle taking her against the wall.

She, Bella Swan, had had sex in public. No, not just sex. Hot, mind blowing sex. Plus, an orgasm right in the middle of a crowded dance floor.

This wasn't her at all. The Bella Swan she knew didn't _think _of outdoor nooky, much less participate in it. Up until last night, all her sexual encounters had taken place in the bedroom. James may have been hot, but he wasn't very imaginative. At least not with her.

The bedroom was private, practical, and… _boring._

Yes, very boring compared to last night. The way he'd taken her, the way she'd wanted him to take her, was something she'd never experienced before. She had never wanted a man with that kind of urgency.

He made her different, he made her feel alive. And she liked it. A lot.

Coming into the house like that, almost frantic to get his clothes off, Bella had forgotten where they were. If Charlie and Esme hadn't walked in-

_Esme._

What was it going to be like - facing her this morning? What if she was angry? It wasn't like she had walked in on anything, but it didn't take that much to put two and two together. Bella's lame contact story just made it that much more obvious. Thank God, Charlie hadn't caught on.

She finished showering and took her time getting dressed, not in any rush to find out what Esme's reaction was going to be like. Once she was finished, she took a deep breath and went downstairs.

Esme was at the kitchen table with papers strewn out in front of her. She looked up when Bella walked in.

"Morning, Esme," Bella said cautiously.

"Good morning, Bella." Esme smiled, but it wasn't as heartfelt as usual.

"What do you have there?" Bella asked as she poured her coffee.

"Oh, my check list, or lists I should say, for the wedding." She sounded tired.

Bella sat across from her. "Do you need help with anything?"

"No, I was just finishing up."

A long awkward silence followed. Bella sipped her coffee while Esme gathered the papers, neither one looking at the other.

Finally, Esme said, "I know I'm not your mother and there's no reason for you to take my advice or listen to me, but I'd like to talk to you about last night."

Bella fiddled with the mug's handle hoping she wouldn't break out in a sweat. "What about it?"

"You and Carlisle." Bella opened her mouth to protest, but Esme stopped her. "I'm aware that you're an adult and capable of making your own choices, but I do have concerns."

Bella forced a smile. "There's really nothing to be concerned about, Esme."

"I wasn't born yesterday, Bella. Besides, you're a pretty horrible liar." She smiled kindly to take the sting out of her words. "I just want you to be aware of what you're getting yourself into."

"I'm not getting myself into anything," she insisted. "We're just…"

"Having fun?"

Bella started at Esme and then nodded. There was no point in lying to her.

"Yes," Esme said, "Carlisle is all about having fun."

Bella's heart dropped to her stomach. She swallowed over the lump in her throat and asked, "What do you mean?"

Esme watched her closely as she said, "Carlisle was forced to grow up fairly quickly when he found out he was going to be a father. Not that he was all that irresponsible or reckless to begin with," she added quickly, "but he was your typical young adult wanting to have a good time."

Bella waited for Esme to continue, practically holding her breath. This was what Bella had been wondering about last night during the drive home. This was what she needed to know.

"His youth disappeared when fate intervened and made him a parent," Esme continued. "Did you know it almost took him twice as long to finish medical school as a normal student?" Bella shook her head. "Having to care for a child, not just emotionally and physically, but financially as well. Having to pay for school was hard for him, too. He worked countless jobs to be able to do it, but he never gave up. "

"What about the boy's mother?" Bella asked softly.

Esme smirked. "She wasn't part of the picture, which made it even harder for Carlisle."

Esme suddenly looked lost in some memory. "He never went out socially. He devoted every single waking moment to school, work and his son."

"Carlisle doesn't say much about him. Why is that?" Bella asked.

Finally, Esme looked at her. "They don't see eye to eye. Really, they don't understand each other."

Bella thought about what Esme had said, but failed to see what it had to do with her. She told Esme this.

"He basically lost his youth around your age, Bella," she said again. "If that happened to you, what would you do later on in life?"

Bella felt cold as the realization suddenly washed over her.

"Try to get it back," she whispered. Esme was silent. "Are you saying this is normal behavior for him? That he does this all the time to try and feel young again?" Bella felt nauseous.

"No," Esme assured her quickly, "but he doesn't limit himself. He won't stick with one person for too long."

"He's commitment phobic," Bella said feeling slightly relieved. Commitment phobic she could handle.

"Something like that. Listen," Esme leaned forward. "Carlisle is incredibly sweet and caring. There's not a mean bone in his body. That's part of what makes him a great doctor, because he genuinely cares about his patients; it's not just a job to him. But he's damaged inside, Bella"

"What do you mean 'damaged?'"

"This is why I'm concerned." She reached for Bella's hand. "After what you've been through the last year, I don't want to see you get hurt like that again."

"This is a completely different situation," Bella insisted. "James and I were in a relationship. Feelings were involved."

"And there's no feelings involved now?" Esme sounded skeptical.

"Not those kinds of feelings, no. I hardly know the guy!"

"Don't be so quick to dismiss them if there is, Bella," Esme said softly.

_What?_

Bella opened her mouth and then closed it. She shook her head, trying to wrap her mind around the conversation.

"Okay, Esme, I'm confused." She rubbed her temples. "You warn me about Carlisle in one breath and then tell me not to dismiss my feelings for him in the next. Which is it? Are you okay with this, or not?

Esme was silent so long, Bella wasn't sure she was going to answer.

"I think you'd be good for him," she finally said, "if he can get passed his hang ups long enough to let you."

Bella had so many questions she wanted to ask, but just then Alice skipped in.

"Morning all!" She looked from Bella to Esme. "Did I interrupt something?"

"No." Esme smiled. "Just girl talk."

"Ohhh, I love girl talk!"

Bella's thoughts drowned the two of them out.

What did Esme mean Carlisle was 'damaged?' What had happened to him? Did it have something to do with his son? Why had he raised him alone? Why didn't they get along?

Bella wondered when the appropriate time was to bring it up. They'd only met two days ago after all. And how would she do it? It's not like she could just go up to him and say, "Hey, Esme tells me you're an emotional retard. Wanna share what that's about?"

Did she even have a right to ask? After all, they were still strangers.

_Strangers that had amazing sex._

Yes, but did that warrant a Q&A? Would he see it as her trying to dig into his past to fit into his future? Would that bother him? Would he be upset enough to end things?

Bella was frustrated. Whoever said no strings attached sex wasn't complicated obviously never had it. Someone needed to write a book on what the proper etiquette was to hooking up.

Tired of thinking about it, she spent the rest of the afternoon watching movies and eating junk food with Alice and Esme. After the third movie, Alice suggested they give each other facials. Ignoring Bella's grumbling she poked around the house until she found the things she said she needed.

While Alice mixed it all together, Bella looked at it in disgust. "Why is it green?" she asked.

"It's supposed to be green. Honestly, Bella, have you never had a facial?" she snipped.

"Do I look like the type of person who enjoys having something that resembles vomit smeared on my face?" she snapped back.

Esme laughed.

"It doesn't look like vomit," Alice muttered. "Besides, it'll give your skin a nice glow so you'll look rejuvenated for Car-whoever comes around," Alice corrected quickly catching her mistake. Pink filled her cheeks.

Bella sighed. "Its okay, Alice. Esme knows."

Alice's eyes widened. "You know about them almost getting it on in the kitchen?"

"Alice!" Bella cried mortified.

"Er, no," Esme said looking just as uncomfortable. "I'm trying to be okay and open-minded about this, but the image of my brother bare assed trying to score with my step-daughter isn't something I need."

_Oh my God._ Was it too much to wish that the floor would open up and swallow her?

Alice laughed so hard she spilled some of her mixture.

"If I'm going to allow that goop to be on my face," Bella said, "I'm going to need some liquid courage."

Esme jumped up and disappeared into the kitchen. She returned a few minutes later with a bottle of wine. Not bothering with a glass, Bella grabbed it from her and took a swig.

"Okay, Alice," she said handing the bottle back to Esme, who surprisingly copied her, "do your worst."

Alice started smearing her face, while Esme put a CD on. The wine and music made the experience a little easier for Bella and soon all three of them were dancing around and sharing the bottle with their faces covered in green paste.

They didn't even hear the door open when Charlie and Carlisle entered. It wasn't until one of them cleared his throat and the other started laughing that they realized they weren't alone. Both men looked highly amused, Carlisle especially, as he took in Bella's deer-caught-in-the-headlights look.

Esme and Alice burst into fits of giggles, while Bella stood rooted to the spot. Even though she was beyond embarrassed to be caught like this, looking at him now she realized she didn't care if he was damaged.

She knew at the end of all this Carlisle Cullen would be walking away with a piece of her heart.


	7. Revelations

_**Thanks to everyone who takes the time to review. I've been in a middle of a huge move so it's taken longer than expected to get it all up.**_

_**SM owns all things Twilight (of course!)**_

Bella found Carlisle reading later that night. He had been distant since returning home, which she hoped was for Charlie's benefit so he wouldn't suspect anything about last night.

Charlie had taken Esme to a movie in Port Angeles, and since it was a later feature, Bella didn't expect them home too early. Alice had gone upstairs twenty minutes after they left, claiming to be tired already. Bella knew it was to give them some privacy, but she also suspected Alice was feeling a little cooped up. She wasn't used to spending her weekends in and didn't know what to do with herself.

Bella slowly approached him, waiting for him to acknowledge her presence. He looked up, but didn't smile. However, he did pat the cushion next to him indicating she should sit. She did, still not sure how to say what needed to be said.

"So, I presume Esme had a talk with you today," Carlisle said softly.

Bella sighed, grateful he started the conversation. "Yeah."

"And she knows about this?" Bella nodded. "How did she take it?"

"Surprisingly well," she muttered, looking down at her hands.

"You don't sound too happy about that." He frowned. "That can only mean one thing. What did she tell you about me?"

She hesitated.

"I'm not going to be upset, Isabella," he promised. He lifted her chin so she had to look at him. "Tell me."

"She didn't tell me very much. She said it was hard for you after your son was born. That you raised him alone and sacrificed a lot." Bella paused. "She also said you had… commitment problems. That was her main concern, she doesn't want to see me get hurt," she mumbled.

"Do you think I'm going to hurt you?" he asked.

"No, it's not like I'm asking you to promise me forever, or even tomorrow."

His expression was unreadable. Silence surrounded them, until he said, "I didn't raise him alone. Esme doesn't give herself enough credit. Who do you think had him all those hours while I was in class, or at work?"

Bella was afraid she'd scare him off the subject if she asked the wrong question too soon. So she asked the simplest one of all, "What's his name?"

Carlisle looked surprised at the question. He was obviously expecting something else.

"Edward," he finally said. "Esme named him after our father," he added.

"Esme?" Now it was Bella's turn to be surprised. He didn't even name his own son?

His smile was sad. "Like I said, she doesn't give herself enough credit."

"Why wasn't his mother involved?"

Carlisle's expression hardened. "She didn't want children." He looked at Bella, saw the confusion on her face and sighed. "Kate was married; she was actually a professor at the college I attended. She was beautiful and of course smart, and like every other male in that class, possibly in the entire school, I wanted her."

The jealousy Bella felt made it hard for her to breathe. She instantly hated Kate.

"I thought you said you didn't sleep with attached women." The question was out of her mouth before she could stop it.

Stupid, Bella.

He smiled sheepishly. "Not anymore." He glanced at her before continuing, "The affair started a few months into the semester. It was fairly brief, maybe six months at the most, and we didn't see each other very often."

"Often enough to create a child," she murmured. Her cheeks grew hot when she realized she said that out loud. "I mean…. I'm sorry."

"No, you're right." he scoffed. "I remember the day she told me like it was yesterday. She asked me to stay behind after class to discuss a paper I had received a low grade on. We hadn't seen each other for weeks, so idiotic me thought that was her way of being alone with me.

"As soon as the door closed she told me she was pregnant. She said if I wanted it she would continue with the pregnancy and sign over all parental rights after the birth. She didn't even look at me when she told me," he remembered, "which was probably a good thing because when she finally did her eyes were so cold and unrecognizable I had trouble concentrating on anything else."

Bella remained quiet, unsure of what to say.

"So, that's what happened. She had the baby and did what she said she would. Last I heard she had resigned and left the city sans husband." He finally looked at Bella then. "That's why I said Esme doesn't give herself enough credit. She practically raised Edward, if it weren't for her who knows what would have happened."

"Why did she practically raise him?"

He hesitated this time. "I had a hard time accepting him at first. I didn't know anything about babies, and Esme just seemed so natural at it. It was stupid and selfish, but I kind of just let her take over the role as a parent for the first little while."

"She doesn't see it that way, though," Bella said softly.

"I know," Carlisle sighed. "She doesn't think I did anything wrong. She thinks I did the best I could considering the situation."

"And you don't believe that?" Carlisle remained silent. Bella debated whether or not to give her opinion. Finally she said, "I think you and Kate both did the best thing possible."

Carlisle looked at her like she was crazy.

"Don't get me wrong," Bella added quickly, "cheating on her husband, with a student no less, was horrible. But she didn't want children, and because of that she knew she couldn't give the baby the life it deserved and needed. So, she gave him to someone who could, and you gave him something she wasn't capable of: love."

Carlisle's expression softened as he thought over what she said. "I never thought about it like that before."

Something clicked in Bella's head. Is that what Esme meant when she said he was 'damaged'? Was he still so traumatized over something that happened twenty years ago that he couldn't give any other woman a fair chance?

"Esme said you and Edward don't understand each other."

Carlisle nodded. "He thinks I abandoned him in favor of a glamorous career. When all I really wanted to do was give him a great life."

"What do you think?"

"I think I did both. I did miss out on too much of his life in order to give him what I wanted him to have."

"I think you did a wonderful thing," Bella said softly. "You stepped up and took responsibility and put your personal life on hold for a long time for the sake of your son. No one can fault you for that, or for how you live your life now that you have the time."

Carlisle stared at her for so long, Bella started to feel slightly uncomfortable under his scrutinizing gaze.

"Are you sure you're only twenty-three, Isabella?"

"What?"

"You just sound very wise beyond your years at times."

"Oh." She smiled. "Would you like to see my driver's license?" she teased.

Carlisle laughed.

"I do have one question, though." she said.

"Just one?" His eyebrows rose in disbelief.

"Well, I do have more than one, but I've been wondering about this one since last night."

"Okay," he said drawing out the word.

"When you said you could only imagine what it must be like to be in a relationship as long as I was, is this why?" She looked at him. "Because you never had the chance to?"

He smiled. "It was a little hard to fit a relationship in with everything else. I had dates, but nothing serious. I couldn't give them the attention they deserved," he explained.

"And now?" she asked, looking down at her hands.

Carlisle picked up on what she was getting at. "I'm not a commitment phobic, Isabella," he said softly. "I just haven't found someone worth the fight."

"Have you looked?" she asked.

His smile was slightly embarrassed again. "Well, no. I figure if it's supposed to happen it will."

"What about children?" She continued to play with her hands, unable to look at him.

No, take that back. Do not go there, Bella.

"I have a child." His voice sounded serious now.

"Do you want more?"

Why the hell are you asking that?

He was quiet for a minute before answering, "I think I'm past that part of my life now."

Bella looked up then. He sounded so broken that she wasn't sure what to say. So she didn't say anything.

Instead, she straddled his lap and kissed him. Her hair created a curtain around their faces, making the moment feel that much more intimate. Carlisle rested his hands on her hips and she immediately felt his arousal.

"It's not too late to take Esme's advice and run as fast as you can from me," he said once the kiss broke.

"That wasn't the advice she gave me," Bella said. "Besides," she continued before he could question what she meant, "I think it is too late." She rocked against him. "What would you think of me if I left you now in the state that you're in?"

He nuzzled her neck, murmuring, "Horrible. Unforgivable."

She closed her eyes, dropped her head back and softly moaned. His teeth grazed her ear and she shuddered. He cupped her face as he kissed her again, tracing his tongue along her lips, into her mouth and against her tongue.

He groaned when she gently captured his tongue between her teeth and sucked. He dropped his hands to her shoulders, slowly rubbing them and then down her sides. His thumbs brushed her breasts, making her nipples strain against the material of her bra begging for his touch.

He kissed down her neck and along her collarbone, rolling her nipples between his fingers. She moaned, pressing herself harder against his straining cock needing to relieve the ache between her legs. She snapped the button on his jeans and unzipped them. The grating of the metal teeth sent a shiver down her spine.

"Wait-"

"No." She slid her hand inside his pants and stroked him through his boxers.

He groaned. "Alice-"

"Won't come down. Trust me."

"Charlie and Esme-"

"Won't be home for hours," she said cutting him off again.

Their eyes locked, and he brushed her hair away from her face. "You make it hard to say no," he said.

"Then don't."

She leaned in to kiss him at the same time he reached for her pants. Needing him naked now, she wiggled out of his arms and dropped to her knees between his legs.

Grasping his jeans, she gave a tug. "Lift up," she demanded.

He grabbed something out of his pocket before thrusting his hips off the couch so she could pull off his jeans and boxers. His cock sprang free, and Bella swallowed hard seeing for the first time exactly what had been inside her last night.

Of course she knew he was huge. She'd felt just how big he was last night, but to actually see him full and throbbing in front of her, the tip of his cock almost brushing his belly button, made her inside's clench. She grew so wet so fast, she was sure she'd soon start dripping all over the new carpet.

The overwhelming need she felt to have him in her mouth, to taste him, shocked her. She'd never enjoyed doing that before.

She had to do it now though.

Wrapping her hand around the base of his shaft, she licked her lips and sucked the head of his cock into her mouth. His groan and sharp intake of breath as her wet mouth met his hot flesh encouraged her to continue. She swirled her tongue around him, sucking more of him into her mouth.

"Fuck Isabella," he panted, trying to resist the urge to thrust his hips.

She gently grazed her teeth along his skin. Her hand stroked the part of his cock that wasn't surrounded by her mouth.

"Jesus! Oh, fuck!" Carlisle groaned.

He grabbed her under her arms and hauled her to her feet. He ripped her pants down, threw them to the side, and pulled her back down so she was straddling him once again.

His cock throbbed against her burning center. She rocked her hips so he slid back and forth between her drenched folds. She cried out as his dick made contact with her clit.

"Uhh, Isabella," he grunted holding her hips still. "You can't… we need…" She moved her hips again. "Fuck! Stop…. Don't…. Stop!"

Bella laughed. "Which is it?"

He pushed her away just long enough to put a condom on. "Don't stop," he growled, pulling her down and thrusting up at the same time.

She screamed as he filled her completely. He dug his fingers into her hips holding her still for a minute, before slowly sliding her up and down.

"Ahh, yes!" Bella moaned. "Mmmm yeah. That feels so good."

"Tell me," Carlisle demanded. "Tell me how it feels. Talk to me, Isabella."

"You're so- Oh! Yes!" Bella needed to move, but he still held her hips. "Please, Carlisle, I need more," she begged.

"More?" He lifted her so his cock was almost all the way out, and then slammed her hips back down. "Like that?"

"Yes, like that, only more!"

"Show me. Show me how you want me to fuck you, Isabella," Carlisle whispered.

She grabbed the back of the couch for leverage, and began thrusting her hips faster.

"Fuck!" Carlisle cupped her breasts through her shirt and squeezed.

Bella moaned as he replaced his mouth with his hands. He bit her nipples through the material that separated their skin, and dropped his hands back to her hips, helping her move harder and faster.

"Yes!" Bella cried. "Mmmm oh, yes!" He was now rubbing her clit as he thrust his hips up.

"Carlisle!" she gasped.

He moaned at the sound of her panting his name. Gently pinching her clit he murmured, "Come for me," before capturing her mouth his.

Shudders ripped through her body as she contracted around his cock. She cried out into his mouth as she felt him come seconds after her.

She collapsed against his chest. She heard his heart pounding, his breathing uneven, and a slight sheen of sweat made his shirt stick to his chest.

Carlisle grabbed a blanket from the end of the couch and draped it around them. He wrapped his arms around her, hugging her closer and kissed the top of her head.

The action was so sweet, so loving it brought tears to her eyes. She quickly blinked them away before he had a chance to notice.

What the hell was wrong with her?

She wasn't supposed to be feeling this way. There was no relationship between the two of them. Getting all teary eyed over a simple peck was ridiculous.

This was sex. Only sex.

Although…

No, there was no although.

Neither one had actually said this was only about sex. He'd never put this thing that was happening between them into a category. He'd never come right out and said this was only a distraction during Charlie and Esme's wedding.

Maybe-

Ugh!

Clearly she had attachment issues.

Why couldn't this be simple for her? Did it get easier with practice? Carlisle was the first guy Bella had slept with since breaking up with James. Actually, other than James, he was the only guy.

Obviously, making the second guy you've ever had sex with your no-strings-attached buddy was a mistake. At least for her. Maybe she should have started at bars with men she'd never see again like Alice had suggested a year ago.

But no. Here she was in the arms of a man she barely knew, having great sex, seeing him every day, trying to talk herself out of rationalizing crying over a kiss on the head.

Pathetic.

Thank God, he couldn't read her mind. He'd probably run for the door so fast he'd forget his pants.

"I hate to do this," Carlisle said breaking into her thoughts, "but we're going to have to move."

Bella sighed, "I know."

"Hey." He grabbed her hand when she made a move to get up.

Bella noticed he looked liked he was in conflict with himself. His lips were pressed together and his eyes slightly closed as if he were debating over something. She watched him without saying a word, waiting for him to continue.

Finally, his face relaxed and he smiled. "I was wondering if you'd like to come with me to Seattle on Monday."

Huh?

"Seattle?"

"Yeah. My realtor gave me a little heads up that they've accepted my offer, so if she can get it set up for Monday I'm going to sign the papers."

"Oh, that was fast. Doesn't it usually take a little longer?"

He shrugged. "The owners moved out months ago so the house is empty. Possession won't be for a couple of weeks still."

"Why do you want me to go with you to sign papers?"

"I'd like to show you the house."

Oh. Wait! Was this a big deal? What did it mean that he wanted to show her his future home? Was he looking for her opinion? Her approval? Her decorating input for the master bed-

Stop it!

"If you don't want to go-"

"No, I do!" She smiled. "I want to see your house."

"I sense a 'but' in there," he said not sounding convinced.

"No. Well, I do feel bad for leaving Alice."

"Alice doesn't seem like the type that needs to be babysat."

"True." Bella chewed on her bottom lip.

"So, you'll come?"

She thought about it for a split second, and then nodded.

"Great!" He kissed her before moving her off of him. He picked up his jeans and leaned down to kiss her once more. "I can't wait to see how my place looks with you in it," he murmured before disappearing upstairs.

What the hell did that mean?

CPOV

What the fuck had be been thinking saying that to Isabella?

I can't wait to see how my place looks with you in it?

Seriously? What. The. Fuck.

Who the hell knew what that crazy statement was now making her think? How did she interpret it? Did she blow it off as nothing? Or was she now picking out what color the curtains should be and china patterns in her head?

No, Isabella wasn't like that. She wasn't crazy enough to blow what he said out of proportion. Was she?

He was the crazy one. Hiding upstairs in the bathroom so he wouldn't have to face her. So he wouldn't have to deal with whatever emotion his words had left.

He gripped the sink until his knuckles turned white and forced himself to look at his reflection in the mirror. He didn't like what he saw.

"Shit!"

He pushed himself roughly off the sink. He hadn't seen that look since he met Kate. It was the same overly excited happy face of someone that had just met the most captivating person.

That look had been dormant for a long time.

That look hadn't ended well the first time.

Kate had been the alluring older woman. The entire horny male population at the school wanted to nail her. She had been the star of many X-rated fantasies of many men. He was sure half the guys in her class would have come in their pants if she had simply let her hair fall from the tight bun she wore while teaching. The black rimmed glasses, tight pencil skirt and white blouse just added to the naughty teacher façade.

He would have given his left nut to find out what she wore under that prissy outfit. And he had found out, without the cost of a body part even. Unless you counted his heart that had been stomped on and crushed to dust later on.

He'd never fully recovered from Kate. He loved his son, but Edward was a constant reminder of her. From the unique color of his hair, to the shape of his nose, to that lopsided smile he had. He even had her musical talent. The only thing Carlisle had contributed it seemed was the color of his eyes.

If you didn't know they were father and son, you'd never guess they were related. If he hadn't secretly gotten that DNA test done when Edward was a baby, he'd probably still be wondering if he was actually his father. Kate told him her husband was unable to have children, which was one of the reasons she was with him. Carlisle never really thought how cold that made her sound until now. Still, he had to be sure this baby he had brought into his life was actually his. He couldn't bond with his new son until he new the truth, so it had been easier to let Esme take over his care. To this day, he still wasn't sure what he would have done if the results had been different.

Esme had opened her heart to the tiny infant and loved him as much as anyone could. He'd even started to break through some of the walls Carlisle had put up around himself. He wasn't sure he would have been able to turn his back on the child if it hadn't been his. Besides, there was no way he could have torn Esme away from her new nephew, blood or no blood. Thankfully, it hadn't come down to making that decision.

The results came back that he was indeed the father and slowly after that moment he began to bond with his new son. He didn't find excuses not to do things for the baby anymore. He spent as much time with him as he could while he wasn't in class or at work. He truly began to love the boy.

It wasn't just because of Edward that he'd never recovered from Hurricane Kate. Being young and naïve he'd actually begun to think he was falling in love with her. When she told him she was pregnant he was stupid enough to see a life with her. She'd leave her husband; they'd get a place of their own and raise their child together.

All thoughts of a happily ever after vanished after thirty seconds when she told him she didn't want the baby, that they couldn't continue what they were doing, that she wasn't willing to give up her career over a mistake. That's all he'd been to her; a mistake. A mistake followed by the worst possible accident in her book.

That had been the last time they'd spoken. Everything had been communicated through lawyers after that. He had tried to stay in her class, but seeing her grow with his child, knowing he would soon be alone to raise it was too much and he dropped out.

He never even saw her after the birth. The hospital had contacted him letting him know his son had been born and that he could come in anytime. The lawyers had met him at the hospital - at her request - handed over papers to sign, and then left with a mumbled, "Good luck and congratulations."

If he'd had any feelings left for her they vanished instantly at the moment.

No, that had not ended well at all.

He didn't want that to happen with Isabella. Not that it would happen exactly like that, he'd never be that stupid again. But when this ended he wanted it to be on good terms. When this ended they'd still be family, they'd still see each other once in awhile. When this ended…

He'd be back to feeling empty.

He swore again and turned the shower on as high and as hot as it would go. Steam filled his lungs as he yanked down his jeans and boxers. He kicked them out of the way in frustration.

He stepped under the stream and hoped that the hot water would burn away his thoughts.

No such luck.

He knew in his head this couldn't be anything long term. He was too old for her for one thing. She deserved to be with someone who could give her a life full of all the experiences youth provided. Forty-one wasn't old by any means, but it was too old for twenty-three.

She needed someone her own age. Someone who could give her the things he couldn't, like children. He'd seen her face fall when he'd said he was past the time for more kids. Whether she realized it or not, she wanted a family. And what about marriage? She seemed distant and uncomfortable helping Esme plan the wedding, but was it something she might want in the future?

He didn't know how he felt about matrimony himself. Would it be fair to drag her along for years without knowing what he wanted, especially if it was something she did.

He grabbed the soap and started washing himself with quick hard jerks.

Why was he even thinking about all of this? It wouldn't work. Period. He was going to be in Seattle, and she had a life in Phoenix. Even if he wanted to he couldn't relocate for at least two years because of his fixed-term contract. Who knew how she'd feel moving for him.

Fuck, there he went again. Here he feared she was downstairs picking out china patterns, and yet he was thinking of her moving to Seattle. How did he go from having awesome sex one minute, to asking her to move in the next?

Oh, right. I can't wait to see how my place looks with you in it. Bloody hell.

Okay, if he was to be totally honest with himself he knew what made him say it. He just didn't want to face that truth anymore than he wanted to go back downstairs and face Isabella.

Insane as it was, especially after only knowing her two short days, he wanted her in is life. In his house. In his bed. He'd wanted her from the second he saw her when he walked through Charlie's door. He'd had his fair share of women over the years, but none compared to her. The first time their hands touched it was charged with something he'd never experienced before. It felt almost unnatural to be drawn to someone the way he felt drawn to her.

There was something about Isabella Swan that got to him. It was something that hadn't gotten under his skin for a long time.

And yet, he knew it couldn't work. There were too many things working against them. Esme may be okay with it, but what about Charlie? How would he feel if he found out his best man, and soon to be brother-in-law, was screwing his daughter's brains out.

Carlisle actually liked having both his balls. The image of them being shot off was not all that appealing to him.

What about Edward? How would he feel about his father dating someone around his age? Not that they had too much to do with each other lately anyway. Ever since Edward had moved to the east coast to attend school they rarely spoke anymore. Most of their communication had been by email. Just a few lines here and there every once in awhile. He never took an interest in Carlisle's dating history before, would he care now? Would something like this drive an even deeper wedge between their already strained relationship?

Then again, maybe he was making too big a deal out of all this. He wasn't even sure how Isabella felt. He was assuming so much over something stupid he let slip. There was only one thing he was sure of. No matter what, someone was going to end up hurt.

"Way to go, Cullen. You're such a fucking moron."

"Guess that explains why you didn't come back downstairs."

He jumped, startled by Isabella's voice. He pulled the curtain back and saw her standing by the sink, hip cocked to the side, arms crossed. She didn't look angry, or even annoyed, which surprised him. If anything she looked apprehensive.

Maybe he did have it all wrong. He was worried she'd take what he said to mean something more than he intended. But what if she was worried that he meant something more by it than he actually did. Maybe she was freaked out he was getting too attached.

Or maybe he was just being an over obsessive dick.

She said it herself: she wasn't asking him to promise her forever, or even tomorrow. Did that mean she only wanted a sexual relationship? Did she think he wanted something more?

And why didn't that make him feel any better? If anything, the thought she might only want sex made him uneasy.

Goddamn it! What the fuck was wrong with him!?

He had a young, beautiful, funny, intelligent, slightly erratic woman ready to jump his bones - or bone - anytime he wanted, and yet he was unhappy because she may not want a relationship?

Christ, he was turning into a girl.

"Carlisle?" She took a step closer looking worried.

The way she said his name tied his stomach in knots. He couldn't imagine someone else saying it the way she did and he didn't want to. And he sure as hell didn't want to imagine her saying some other guys name that way.

Jealousy rose in his chest at that thought. His Isabella moaning some stranger's name. His Isabella responding to that guy's touch the way she responded to his. His Isabella being filled by-

It was too much!

He grabbed her arm and pulled her into the shower.

"Carlisle!"

Her laugh was music to his ears. He crushed her to his chest, pulling her under the water and soaking them both.

Her blue t-shirt clung to her wet skin. Carlisle traced the outline of her bra that was visible beneath the soaked material. Her nipples pebbled under his touch and she shuddered. He loved how responsive she was to him.

It dawned on him then, that this would be the first time he'd see her entirely naked. And he couldn't wait. He grabbed her shirt and lifted it over her head. It dropped to the floor with a loud thunk.

He turned her so the shower rained over her chest. Water droplets trailed down her breasts, disappearing between her cleavage. He dipped his head and dragged his tongue over her skin. She moaned as he plunged his tongue between the valley of her breasts. He slid his hands up her back and unhooked her bra clasp.

She shivered as the cups fell away from her. He stripped the bra off her, dropping it on top of her shirt. Kissing his way over her chest his lips found her nipple. He flicked it with his tongue, while he massaged her other breast.

"Ohhh, Carlisle," she moaned.

He swirled his tongue around her right nipple, then tugged on it with his teeth until he heard the groan that made his dick as hard as granite. He dropped to his knees while kissing down her stomach, dipping his tongue into her navel. He unbuttoned her pants and wrestled them down her hips. The soaked denim clung to her body making the material that much harder to get off her.

Isabella giggled at his struggle, and he grinned up at her when she was finally free. Watching her face, he ran his hands slowly up her legs.

She was so damn beautiful, and not just in looks. The way she seemed to see the good in everything, like when he told her about Kate. Instead of bashing what she had done, she saw only the positive about Kate's decision. Not too many people could do that. She was almost like Esme in that way.

Carlisle wondered how someone could have someone as special as Isabella and be able to let her go. He had a fleeting thought of the guy who cheated on her. What a royal fuck up he'd been. Although his loss, was Carlisle's gain.

For now at least.

He pushed the thought out of his mind, and focused his attention back on the woman in front of him.

He stood up, pulling her body to his as he kissed her. She kissed him back with just as much passion and wrapped her arms around his neck.

He groaned, pressing her against the wall and his cock twitched against her mound. She sighed, and hooked her leg around his hip, giving him better access to her hidden treasures.

His erection pulsed against her swollen flesh, aching to be inside her. Slowly, he rocked his hips back and forth. He knew the wetness he felt had nothing to do with the water.

"Fuck." He grabbed her ass and squeezed her naked flesh.

"Oh my God!"

"You have no idea what you do to me, Isabella." His voice was raspy.

"I think I have a pretty good idea," she teased, her hand suddenly between her legs grasping his cock.

His breath hissed out of him. Feeling her wet, swollen lips on the head of his dick, and her hand stroking the rest of him made it hard for him to think. Before he could stop himself, he pushed her hand away and thrust deep inside her.

"Jesus Christ," he swore and groaned.

She was so wet, so warm, so god dammed tight. She gripped his cock in a way he'd never felt before. He knew this was wrong. He knew they shouldn't be together like this. The risks were too high for both of them.

But she felt so fucking amazing! It had been so long since he'd allowed himself to be intimate with no barriers.

And why do you think that is?

The reasonable side of him snapped him out of his stupidity. He pulled out of her.

"Isabella we can't. Not like this," he whispered.

"It's okay, I'm on-"

"No, it's not-"

"- the pill."

His mind went blank. He forgot the reasons why he shouldn't be doing this. All he could think of was he could be with her, flesh to flesh, if he wanted to. She watched him, waiting for some kind of reaction.

"Turn around," he said thickly.

Isabella swallowed, slowly turning her back to him.

"Put your hands on the wall," he ordered.

She did as he said.

He moved closer to her, his cock bumping her ass. He covered the back of her hands with his, and slowly started moving them down her arms, over her shoulders and breasts, along her stomach to her hips.

"Spread your legs."

She did. He fit himself between them, held her hips and thrust inside her. Both of them moaned in unison. He pulled out and thrust back in, harder this time.

"Yes," she whimpered. "Please."

He did it again.

"Isabella," he growled, slamming into her over and over again.

She panted beneath him, encouraging him to fuck her harder and faster, until he was pounding her.

"I'm so close, Carlisle. So close to coming."

Fuck-thrust-fuck-thrust-fuck-thrust. Hearing those words from her was so hot.

"Carlisle!" she screamed, muffling the sound with her arm.

"Yes, it's so fucking hot when you scream my name," he told her.

And then she said something that made him lose his last shred of control. "Come inside me, Carlisle."

He slammed into her so hard, he lifted her off the floor. She cried out, whether in pain or pleasure he wasn't sure at that moment. He locked his mouth to the back of her neck to keep from bellowing his release.

It was only after he'd calmed down, and was breathing somewhat normally again, that he noticed the mark on her neck.

He had marked her.

For the first time in his life, he'd marked someone as his.

He wasn't sure how he felt about that. The only thing he was sure of was when it came to Isabella Swan, he was in deeper than he ever thought possible.

_**Hope you enjoyed! **_


	8. Anticipation

_**To everyone who reviews, thank you! This chapter took forever. I had the worst case of writers block. **_

_**As always SM owns everything!**_

_**And a big thanks to Leslie who betas for me! **_

"Nice shower?" Alice asked gleefully as soon as Bella walked into the bedroom.

Bella's cheeks warmed. "You heard us?"

Alice rolled her eyes. "At times it felt like I was in the same room as you, only blindfolded and unable to enjoy the full benefits of free porn. Now I know how blind people must feel," she mused.

Bella was horrified. _Had they really been that loud_? Alice saw her expression and grinned.

"Yeah, the walls really are that thin in this place," she said.

"I wouldn't know." Bella shrugged, trying to act like it was no big deal. "It's not like I was having a whole lot sex when I lived here."

"At least you're making up for lost time."

"You're unbelievable," Bella muttered, digging through her suitcase.

"No, he sounded like he was unbelievable." Alice winked. "By the way," she said, picking up Bella's cell, "this has been going off non-stop." She held out it out for Bella. "I think it's your mom- What is that?!" she gasped.

"What?" Bella looked around the room.

"You have a hickey!" Alice cried.

"I have a what?"

"A hickey! You know, a reddish mark on the skin caused by excessive sucking."

"I know what a hickey is," Bella snapped. "Where?"

Alice lifted her hair away from the back of her neck. "Right there! Oh my God, you let him brand you!"

"No, I didn't." Bella reached to feel the spot Alice had indicated.

"I can't believe you broke one of the top five rules," Alice muttered.

"What the hell are you talking about," Bella asked, annoyed.

"You never let a hook up brand you. It makes you look taken to any other potential available men."

"Can I find the rest of these rules in Alice's Official Guide to Emotionless Sex?"

Alice laughed. "Why buy the book when I can give you a run down for free?"

Bella stood in front of her old dresser trying to see the evidence of her and Carlisle's tryst. And there it was, about the size of a quarter. The color stood out against her fair skin, making it that much more obvious. Bella remembered Carlisle burning his face in her neck when he came, but she must have been so caught up in the moment she hadn't noticed his extra nibbling.

Guess she wouldn't be putting her hair up for awhile. The last thing she needed was Charlie questioning her about it.

"So, did you guys at least untangle your tongues long enough to talk tonight?"

"Yes."

"And?"

Sharing what Carlisle had told her seemed wrong. It was too personal to tell anyone, even Alice.

"He asked me to go with him to Seattle on Monday."

Alice's eyebrows rose. "Why?"

Bella shrugged. "To look at his house."

Alice's silence was deafening. Alice was never quiet. This couldn't be good. Bella peeked at her from the corner of her eye, trying to gauge her reaction.

"Bella," she finally said softly, "do you know what you're doing?"

"What?"

"I know you, Bella. You've never had sex just for the sake of having it. You're not that type of person. You waited months to sleep with James."

"I was seventeen!"

"Okay, but even after you broke up you never attempted to be with another guy."

"I was heartbroken if you don't remember!" _What the hell was Alice getting at?_

"My point exactly. You put your heart into everything, Bella."

Bella spun around to face her. "You were the one who encouraged this," she accused.

Alice didn't even flinch. "Yeah, I encouraged you to have sex with him, not talk yourself into having feelings for him."

"I'm not… I don't…" Bella sputtered.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Who do you think you're talking to? Bella, you over think everything. You analyze every little thing. It's impossible for you to just go with the flow and not wonder where it's headed."

Bella opened and closed her mouth.

"It's not a bad thing," Alice assured her. "Unless it's going to get you hurt."

"Why does everyone assume I'm going to end up hurt?"

"We're not assuming you will be, we just don't want to see it happen," Alice said gently.

"There's no reason to worry."

"Oh, really?" Alice crossed her arms. "So you haven't wondered what this trip to Seattle means? You haven't tried to define this thing going on between the two of you? You haven't thought about what's going to happen once this is over?"

"No." _At least not the last part._

What would happen when it was time for her to go back to Phoenix? They'd probably still see each other occasionally because of Charlie and Esme, but would they keep in touch on their own? Would they make plans to see each other again, and not just with family? Would he want to? Or would he rather just-

_Ugh! _Alice knew her too well.

"Fine. I've had a couple fleeting thoughts about all this," Bella admitted, "but it's nothing to worry about. I'm not in love with him or anything."

Alice didn't look convinced.

"C'mon Alice, you do things like this all the time."

"Not all the time," Alice mumbled.

"Why is it okay for you, but not for me?"

"I'm not saying it's not okay for you to do it. I'm only saying not to read too much into it."

Bella nodded, hoping she'd let the subject go. "Do you mind if I leave you here alone?"

"Esme said she'd show me some of her work. I'll be fine, don't worry."

"Okay."

"You might want to cover that mark up. We already share a bed, if you appear with a hickey your parents might get the wrong idea," Alice teased, crawling into bed.

"Charlie might actually prefer it came from you rather than Carlisle," Bella muttered.

Sunday seemed to drag on. Carlisle had already left with Charlie to do some more fishing by the time Bella woke up. She spent the day experimenting with Esme and Alice in the kitchen. Esme wasn't sure what she wanted to serve at the reception for hor'dourves and wanted to toy with a few different recipes.

Bella's attention kept drifting to the clock. The hands moved at a snail's pace and she wondered if the batteries were dying. There had to be some reason why time seemed to be standing still.

"You know the saying, 'a watched pot never boils', Bella?" Esme suddenly asked.

Bella blushed, knowing she'd been caught. She busied herself with the food, trying to avoid the clock.

The men didn't return until hours later. Bella was watching a movie with Alice when she heard the car pull into the driveway. Her stomach gave an unexpected leap.

Alice looked at her and muttered, "Down girl," just as the door opened.

Charlie came in first, laughing at something Carlisle had said.

"Hey girls," Charlie said. "Esme in bed already?"

"Yeah. There are leftovers in the fridge if you're hungry," Bella said, quickly glancing at Carlisle.

"Nah." Charlie patted his stomach. "We grabbed something on the way home."

"Yeah, I'm stuffed," Carlisle added.

Charlie chuckled. "That waitress was mighty disappointed you didn't stay for dessert."

The green eyed monster inside Bella raised her head.

"I'm sure she would have taken you home and baked it herself if you had agreed."

Bella looked at Alice who shrugged.

"But then I'm sure you're used to that kind of attention from all those good lookin' nurses at the hospital," Charlie continued.

_Ouch._

Bella kept her eyes locked on the TV to avoid looking at Carlisle. The monster inside her was anything but quiet though.

Some waitress had flirted with him? Had made advances at her man? Bella ground her teeth together at the jealousy she felt.

_This wasn't good at all._

She waited for Carlisle to deny what her father had said about the nurses, but when all he did was laugh along with him she had to ball her hands into fists to keep from wrapping them around his neck until he spilled his guts and gave up the names of the women so she could hunt them down. Talk about overreacting.

Alice saw her frustration and jumped up. "Well, I think it's time for bed," she declared. "Bella has a big day tomorrow."

_Thanks, Alice. Nothing's sexier than being referred to like a 5 year old._

"Oh?" Charlie turned to her. "Whatcha up to, Bells?"

Bella glared at Alice, who realized her mistake. "I'm going to Seattle," Bella finally said. She risked a glance at Carlisle who looked surprised, and a little worried, by her confession. "Alice has never been there, so I told her I'd take her."

"Yeah, and playing tour guide to me is, like, a really big job, so she'll need lots of rest," Alice added, pulling Bella to her feet.

Bella rolled her eyes.

"Well, you girls have fun," Charlie told them, heading for the stairs. "I'm off to bed."

Alice winked and followed Charlie upstairs. Bella waited until she heard both bedroom doors close before turning to Carlisle.

"I'm sorry," he said immediately.

Bella frowned. "For what?"

"Last night." He looked uncomfortable. "It was irresponsible and wrong to be with you unprotected like that."

_Oh._

"And for… for marking you," he mumbled.

"You're sorry for giving me a hickey?" Bella didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

"Yes. I mean I'm not a teenager and it's kind of an immature thing for a forty-one year old man to do," he explained quickly. "It's kind of a possessive and territorial display and… I'm sorry."

"It's really not a big deal."

Okay, him regretting it was a big deal, but the act itself… It was just a mark after all. It would fade soon enough. Was it really something to get upset over?

"Okay." He looked like he wanted to say something else. Bella waited, but he remained silent.

"Look, if you've changed your mind about Seattle tomorrow-"

"No!"

"Okay."

_Why does he look so damn uncomfortable? And why does this feel so freaking awkward._

Something had changed. Bella wasn't sure what it was, but she had a sinking feeling something was wrong.

"Okay," she repeated again. "I guess I'll see you in the morning then."

"Wait," he sighed when she turned to leave.

She stopped, but didn't turn around. He reached for her hand.

"I'm sorry," he said again.

Bella's sigh was out of frustration. "What for now?"

"This tension. It's not intentional," he promised. "I just have a lot on my mind and it's a little confusing."

Bella nodded, looking at him. He smiled and leaned down to softly kiss her.

"Sleep well," he whispered.

"You, too."

"I'd sleep better if you were in my arms."

Bella's heart raced at the line. "If you're feeling risky…" She wiggled her eyebrows.

Carlisle chucked. "Risky, yes. Suicidal? Not so much."

Bella laughed. "Sleep as well as you can, then."

Carlisle nodded, kissed her once more and watched her go upstairs.

Bella was awake long before she needed to be the next morning. She lay in bed for what seemed like hours, waiting to hear other sounds of life in the house. Finally she heard the shower turn on and someone, Esme she presumed, go downstairs.

She jumped out of bed with more enthusiasm than necessary, waking Alice up in the process.

"Whaa- Bella?" Alice grumbled, rolling over.

"Sorry. Go back to sleep," Bella whispered.

"Are you sneaking out?" Alice whispered back.

"No"

She frowned, confused. "Then what are you doing?"

"Going downstairs."

"With who?"

Bella shrugged and yanked her shirt over her head. "Whoever's up."

Alice blinked a couple of times at the clock and groaned into her pillow. "Why are you up so early?"

"I couldn't sleep."

"Anxious are we?"

Bella rolled her eyes. "Go back to sleep, Alice."

Bella opened the door and Alice lifted her head, sniffing the air.

"Is that coffee?"

"Smells like it."

"Hold on. Wait! I'm coming." Alice scurried out of bed, passing Bella with, "Gee, now I sound like you the other night." She danced out of the way of Bella's attempted slap and bounced down the stairs.

"You sound much sexier than that," Carlisle breathed into her ear as he walked by. He grinned back at her and she quickly followed him downstairs feeling as giddy as a teenager.

"Morning, Dad, Esme," she said, practically skipping to the coffee machine.

"Morning, Bells."

Bella poured her coffee and took her usual seat beside Alice.

"You girls are up early," Charlie observed.

Bella shrugged. "Couldn't sleep."

"I, on the other hand, was woken up," Alice muttered into her coffee.

"Bella," Esme said, "when it comes to your hair for the wedding, would you rather wear it up or leave it down?"

"Down!" Bella, Alice and Carlisle all cried together.

Bella quickly looked at Alice, who smirked, then at Carlisle, who was avoiding looking at her and Charlie.

Charlie was looking at Carlisle clearly confused. "I didn't realize you knew anything about hairstyles, Carlisle," he said.

Carlisle cleared his throat. "I don't, but Esme showed me some photo albums and Bella looks more flattering with her hair down. Not that you look bad with it up," Carlisle added quickly, darting his eyes to Bella. Panic was written all over his face. "Esme, you said you were going to wear your hair up, right? So, you don't want to match." He looked at her. "Unless you do… I just…" He looked back at Charlie. "I have no real opinion."

His eyes darted to Bella once more before dropping to his food.

Charlie eyed him thoughtfully before looking at Bella.

"Is there something you two want to share-"

"No!" Bella and Esme cried this time.

Charlie looked back and forth between the two. "If there's something going on…" he started to say and then changed his mind. "You know what? I don't want to know."

He stood, kissed Esme, shot one more glance at Bella and Carlisle and left with a shake of his head.

"Esme, I'm sorry-" Esme held up her hand cutting Bella off.

"I don't want to know either." She pushed away from the table. "Just make sure you two are back before he gets home, unless you want him to know."

"I think it's a little late for that," Alice commented under her breath.

Carlisle drank the rest of his coffee and stood. "Ready?" he asked Bella.

"You still want to go?" she asked, a little surprised.

"Why not?"

"I just thought with my dad already suspicious you might want to play it safe."

Carlisle shrugged. "The damage is already done, but if you want to stay I understand."

"No." Bella jumped up. "I've just got to grab my purse."

He nodded. "I'll be in the car."

Bella sprinted upstairs, grabbed her purse, said a quick goodbye to Alice and Esme and rushed out the door.

Besides idle chitchat, the ride to Seattle was filled with awkward silences. Everything had been so easy and smooth between them, Bella was surprised to sit and listen to his music collection rather than his voice.

Every time she glanced at him, he was either clenching the steering wheel so hard his knuckles where turning white, or looking at her out of the corner of his eye.

What was he thinking? What had she done for him to be acting like this? He was the one who had still wanted to go today. If he was going to be like this, why hadn't he just told her he changed his mind? Was he upset about Charlie? Should she ask? Or should she stay quiet and wait for him to relax?

"I'm surprised it hasn't rained the last couple of days." Bella cringed hearing herself.

_Had she really just commented on the weather?_

"Uh…yeah it's been reasonably warm lately," Carlisle said.

Bella sighed. Staying quiet was probably the right choice.

"So are you looking forward to going back to Phoenix?"

She swallowed over the lump that had suddenly formed in her throat over the thought of going home.

"I told my dad and Esme that I'd stay at their place while they're in Mexico." She looked at Carlisle. "I'm here for a little while longer."

"You don't have work or anything to get back to?"

"Not really. Alice and I are getting a place together when we get back and I'll start work then."

Carlisle said no more.

"So, is Edward going to be at the wedding?"

_Great. First the weather and now the angry son. You must really be desperate for conversation, Swan._

"Not that I'm aware of," Carlisle said carefully. "Neither him or Esme has mentioned it."

"Isn't that a little weird?"

"Weird?"

"Considering what you told me, it sounded like he's close to Esme. I just thought he'd be there for her wedding."

Carlisle mulled this over before muttering, "Edward doesn't feel obligated to do anything."

He drove them to North Seattle and pulled up in front of a house in the Wedgewood neighbourhood.

"This is it," he declared, unsnapping his seatbelt.

Bella looked out the window at the grey two story house. It looked almost brand new.

She slowly got out of the car and walked around the front where Carlisle was waiting for her.

At the front door, he reached into the mailbox and took out a house key.

"Does your realtor always leave keys laying around?"

"Only on special occasions." He winked at her and unlocked the door.

They walked into what Bella presumed was the dinning room area. Carlisle directed her to the right into the spacious kitchen. Maple cabinets lined the walls and a breakfast bar and pantry also housed the space. Bella wasn't much of a cook, but she was sure anyone who did work magic in the kitchen would feel right at home here.

The only magic Bella could think of making was with Carlisle on the large center island. Naked. Or maybe on the granite counters. Or even the hardwood floors.

"Do you like it?" he asked.

"Definitely," she practically moaned. The blush must have given her away because Carlisle chucked and placed his hand on the small of her back, turning her.

"This is the living room."

_Mmm, a fireplace._

"The laundry room is back there," he said, pointing towards the back of the house, "along with the half bath and small bedroom. I think that one will be my office."

"How many bedrooms are there?"

"Four," He shrugged. "I probably don't need that many, but…"

"They came with the house," she joked.

He grinned and led her upstairs.

"These are the spare rooms," he explained, pointing to two closed doors. "And the guest bathroom."

He stopped in front of the last door and swung it open. The master bedroom was huge, with a walk in closet and its own bathroom. Bella peeked into the bathroom and saw "his" and "her" sinks; a Jacuzzi tub and a glass shower stall large enough for a small house party.

_Oh, the things they could do in there._

Jesus, she was turning into a nympho.

Bella walked around the bedroom, stopping at the window to enjoy the mountain view. It also overlooked the fenced backyard that had a deck surrounding the entire back of the house.

"Well?" Carlisle asked, walking up behind her. He put his arms around her waist and softly kissed the back of her neck. "What do you think?"

"I like it," she said. "Only, I expected something older, something you could fix up." His lips stilled on her neck. "I don't know why, though."

"I would love to build my own place one day," he said. "I just don't have the time right now."

"That's a shame."

"Why?"

"Because the thought of you building something, using your hands that way, is extremely hot."

He laughed and turned her to face him. "I'm sorry for this morning," he said.

"You mean with Charlie?"

He nodded. "And for basically ignoring you in the car."

Bella frowned. "What was that about?"

"This thing, you and me, it's very confusing sometimes," he confessed. "I feel like I'm taking advantage of you at times."

"What?" Bella laughed, only to realize he was serious. "Is it the age thing?"

"Not as much as you'd think. Most of the time I forget your only twenty-three."

"That's a good thing, right?" Bella asked, playing with his collar.

"Like I said, it's confusing."

"You're confusing," Bella muttered.

"I know." He smiled.

"And that's not a good thing, just so you know."

"I know," he sighed.

"Do you…" Bella bit her lip, not sure how to ask what she needed to ask. "Do you feel like you're taking advantage of me because of Kate?"

Carlisle pulled a little bit away from her. She held onto his waist so he couldn't go too far. When she looked up at him, his eyes were squinted with confusion.

"What would Kate have to do with this?"

"How old was she when you were with her?"

"Early thirties, I think. She never really told me." He frowned. "Why?"

"I don't know. I mean, do you feel like you're taking advantage of me like she did you?"

Carlisle opened his mouth, but no sound came out.

"Because you're not," she assured him quickly.

"Why would you even think that?" He sounded angry.

"Because of the age difference," she answered softly.

"It never even crossed my mind."

_Until now. Way to go, Bella. Give him another reason to pull away._

"Okay. Good."

The silence between them seemed to last forever. Bella avoided looking at him and he felt tense and uncomfortable beneath her hands.

"Isabella," he finally whispered, "I'm confused because being with you feels too damn good. You make me feel like I'm twenty-three again and have my entire life ahead of me to be with you. And no matter how many times I tell myself that it makes absolutely no sense to feel this way about someone I've only known a handful of days, it just gets more intense whenever I'm with you.

Bella's heart throbbed. The lump that had once again risen in her throat made it hard to breathe. Her eyes burned with tears that wanted to spill over her lids.

_Breathe and keep it together. Turning into a sobbing mess and passing out is sure to ruin the moment._

"Carlisle, I…"

_No, keep your mouth shut! That's sure to ruin the moment, too._

"Carlisle, I think… I feel-"

"Don't. It's hard enough."

And then he was kissing her. It wasn't like their other kisses. Oh, the passion was still there. The need and the want still boiling beneath their lips, but the fevered eagerness had disappeared. He kissed her softly, taking his time exploring her mouth. He told her with his tongue that this was not going to be rushed. That they had the time to take it slow, and that he planned to do exactly that.

He lowered her to the floor. The carpet felt so soft against Bella's back it was as if she was laying on a pile of silk.

Carlisle pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it aside. He leaned over her, placing a trail of kisses from her neck, over her collarbone and down to her breasts. His tongue dipped under the cup of her bra, nudging it aside to expose her painfully erect nipple.

She moaned when he sucked it into his mouth, his tongue playing with the hard bud. He stripped the bra off her, cupping his hands over her mounds, gently squeezing as he kissed down her stomach.

She gasped as his tongue invaded her bellybutton. Who knew such a small cavity could hold so much pleasure?

As he dragged his hands down her ribcage, she squirmed beneath him. Between his feather like touch and his teasing mouth, Bella felt like she was on fire. Her core ached, needing to be touched, to feel some kind of release.

As if reading her mind, Carlisle placed his hand between her legs and pressed the seam of her jeans against her clit.

"Oh my God," she groaned, bucking under his touch to push herself harder against his hand.

"I can feel how hot you are through your pants, Isabella," he murmured. "How hot you are for me."

"Take them off," she begged.

"My pleasure."

The snapping of the button and zipper echoed in the room. Bella arched her bottom so he could pull her jeans down. He groaned when he discovered she wore no panties underneath.

He placed his hands on the inside of her thighs and spread her legs open. Bella swallowed hard as she watched him stare at her.

"Isabella?" he finally said, his voice raspy.

"Yes?" The word barely came out a whisper. To say her mouth was dry would be an understatement.

"I'm going to taste every inch of you."

Carlisle dropped his head and Bella cried out as his tongue dove into her drenched center.

"Carlisle! Ohmygod! Yes!"

Bella panted, thrashing her hips as his mouth worked magic on her. He held her hips down as his tongue playing with her clit.

"Jesus Christ!" she gasped, her fingers working their way into his hair as her body tensed. "Carlisle, I'm…" she panted. "I'm…"

He flicked her clit once more and her body exploded. She grasped his hair harder as her eyes rolled back in her head and she shuddered beneath him. Bella laid there, eyes closed, trying to catch her breath. She heard Carlisle unbuckling his pants and when she opened her eyes he was leaning over her looking concerned.

"Are you okay?"

She smiled, reaching for him. "Definitely. But I know a way you can make me feel even better."

Carlisle smiled and buried his face in her neck at the same time he entered her.

"God Isabella," he moaned, "you feel so fucking amazing."

"So do you."

Bella ran her hands down his back to his ass and pulled him closer. She needed to feel every inch of him inside her.

"Wrap your legs around me," he whispered.

She did and they both moaned as he sank even deeper into her. Carlisle slowly pulled out of her, until just the tip of his cock was touching her flesh, and then just as slowly pushed back in. In. Out. In. Out. In.

"Fuck. Yes! More!" Bella groaned.

Carlisle sat up on his knees, grabbed her by her hips and started pumping in and out of her a little faster.

"Touch yourself for me, Isabella," he instructed.

_Um, what?_

Did he just ask her to touch herself?

No, he didn't _ask. _He _told _her to.

She couldn't do that. Could she?

She was no stranger to getting herself off - it had been a long dry spell after all - but to do it in front of him?

No, she couldn't

"Isabella?"

_No._

He stopped moving and pulled his cock out of her all together.

_No!_

"Carlisle-"

"Not until you touch yourself for me. To be able to see your hands on your own skin while I'm fucking you-"

_Holy shit! _She was sure she'd do just about anything as long as he kept saying "fuck".

"-is the sexiest thing I can think of." He grinned. "Plus, I'm not touching you again until you do."

_Bastard!_

"Carlisle-"

"Do it."

_No._

Her hands moved to her breasts.

_No! _Why wasn't her brain listening?

"Yes." Carlisle slid back inside her as her fingers brushed her nipples.

She closed her eyes.

"Open your eyes."

_No, can't do that!_

They snapped open.

"Watch me watching you," he demanded.

_Oh dear Lord_. Why couldn't demanding Carlisle come out to play more often?

Bella felt the heat burning her cheeks, and desperately hoped Carlisle thought she was flushed from being turned on. How juvenile was it to blush over this?

She tweaked her nipples and Carlisle groaned, "Don't stop."

As she rolled them between her fingers, he braced himself above her on his hands and started thrusting faster.

Bella kneaded her breasts, locking her eyes with his.

"Fuck yes," he grunted.

Knowing it was turning him on gave Bella the courage she needed to move her hand down her stomach. His eyes followed her hands as it disappeared between them and found her clit.

Carlisle thrust harder once and then stopped.

"Again," Bella moaned.

"No."

_No? _What the hell was wrong with this man? He was a doctor after all. Didn't he realize that stopping in the middle of fantastic sex was bad for his health?

He sat up again, but pulled away from her completely this time.

"Show me," he said simply.

Bella swallowed. "Show you what?"

"Show me how you touch yourself when you're alone."

His eyes burned into hers until she slid her fingers lower and dipped two of them inside her wetness.

A breath hissed out of Carlisle while he watched her play with herself. Bella's embarrassment soon turned to something else. Having Carlisle watch her get herself off was the most erotic thing she had ever done. She kept her eyes on his face and was in awe of how much this was turning him on. She was surprised to discover it turned _her_ on as well.

She watched as he reached down with his right hand and began stroking his shaft and head as his cock grew impossibly harder.

While one hand continued to fill her, she squeezed her clit with the other, moaning.

"Mmm, Carlisle, it feels sooo good." _Did she really just say that? _"I love how wet you get me. How your cock glides into me, filling me like no one has ever done before."

"Isabella…"

She spread her legs wider, offering him an even better view. She plunged a third finger in while saying, "I think of how it feels when you're fucking me all the time. Whenever I'm around you, the only thing I want to do is rip your clothes off and ride your cock."

_Ring. Hello? Oh, its Bella's inner porn star calling. Yeah, I didn't know she had one either!_

"Look at me, Carlisle."

And then she did something she never thought in a million years to do. She brought her soaked fingers to her mouth and slowly, one by one, sucked them clean.

Carlisle's growl irrupted around them and made her jump. Before she had a chance to react, he'd positioned himself between her legs again and plunged deep inside her.

"You're a fucking tease, Isabella Swan," he grunted, thrusting harder with each word.

"That… will teach you… to stop….fucking me," she panted in broken breaths with his thrusts.

Carlisle pounded her with inhuman speed. Bella screamed, coming around his cock harder than ever before. He cried his own release a few seconds later, capturing her mouth in a heated kiss as he did.

"That was something else," he said, once his breathing had returned to normal.

"Mmm hmm."

He rolled over and nuzzled her ear. "You're full of surprises."

"I think you bring it out in me," she said softly.

"I like it."

"Me, too. You know what would make this even better, though?"

"What?"

"Food," Bella laughed. "I'm starving!"

Carlisle instantly looked apologetic.

"I'm sorry, Isabella. I should have had something put in the fridge."

"It's probably better to just grab something, anyway. You know, so we can beat Charlie home."

"Right." His eyes lost some of the excitement they had.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Bella propped herself up on her elbow to be eye level with him. He looked at her and then quickly shifted his eyes away.

"That right there tells me you're lying. What is it?"

He sighed. "I hate sneaking around. It doesn't seem normal at my age."

Bella laughed. "I didn't realize I was sleeping with an eighty year old."

"What?"

"You make yourself sound so old sometimes, Carlisle."

"I feel old sometimes." He looked at her. "Except when I'm with you." He stroked her face and smiled.

"_You make me feel like I'm twenty-three again and have my entire life to be with you."_

_My entire life to be with you…_

Wow. That sounded… huge.

He couldn't have possibly meant it the way it sounded. Could he?

When she took the words apart like that, it sounded like he wanted to be with her. Like he wanted to be with her forever.

_Impossible._

She had to have it wrong. Carlisle couldn't possibly want a relationship with her.

But what if he did?

Bella's stomach did summersaults at the thought.

"Isabella?"

She snapped out of her daze and stared at the beautiful man in front of her.

Could this amazing doctor want to be with plain old her?

"Isabella?"

"Hmm?"

"I asked if the deli a couple of streets over was alright."

"Sure."

He watched her get up and start dressing, before starting to dress himself. Outside, he dropped the key back in the mailbox and walked Bella to the passenger door.

"Thank you for coming today," he said.

"I do every time, remember?" Bella winked and opened the door.

He laughed and playfully swatted her behind.

"Little minx."

They both ordered ham and cheese sandwiches and sat at a corner table away from everyone else.

Carlisle wordlessly caressed her hand with his finger, making small circles on the inside of her palm. Her foot nudged his, playing a high school game of footsie.

The ride home was quiet again, but comfortable this time. Neither had to say a word to know each was thinking of their afternoon together.

Bella held her breath as they turned onto Charlie's street hoping not to see his car. Much to her relief, his parking spot remained empty.

"Isabella, I meant what I said earlier. Thank you for coming with me today," he said, shutting the car off.

"No, thank you for showing me a part of your new life," she said softly.

He smiled at her, looking as if he wanted to say so much more. Bella wasn't sure if she could handle hearing what he might say. Especially when their time together was almost over. Not giving him a chance, she got out of the car and heard his heavy sigh before closing the door.

Charlie didn't mention the breakfast incident when he returned home, but all throughout the night his attention was on Bella and Carlisle. Every once in awhile he'd look at Esme, only to quickly shift his eyes back to the pair, as if he'd miss something if he looked away too long.

He stayed up longer than usual that night also. Bella was slightly annoyed when he said he wanted to catch the game, knowing it was just an excuse to continue his babysitting. And even more frustrated with him when he decided to stay up after the game to chitchat.

"Do you hunt, Carlisle?" he suddenly asked.

"No, I've never had the chance."

"We should go hunting sometime. I'm an excellent shot, you know."

Alice looked at Bella, eyes wide. Bella shot daggers at her father.

Carlisle swallowed loudly. "I don't think I'd be much good at hunting."

"That's enough, Charlie," Esme finally said. "It's time for bed."

"But-" The glare she gave him cut off any excuse he had. "Fine," he grumbled, shooting one last look at Carlisle. "Night."

Esme and Charlie had barely made it upstairs before Alice and Bella burst into fits of giggles over Carlisle's panicked expression.

The next few days were packed with wedding details, Bella barely had time to say hello to Carlisle, much less anything else.

With guests arriving and all the last minute errands she had to run with Esme, Bella was sure she'd never have time alone with Carlisle again.

Charlie and Esme had decided to have the wedding and the reception at the Forks Banquet Hall. The night before the wedding, the bridal party and Alice, gathered at the hall for rehearsal.

Bella stood along side Esme as she practised her vows, half listening to the justice of the peace, Mr. Harper, giving his instructions. She was distracted by Carlisle.

_What was he doing?_

Every time she looked at him, he'd shift his eyes to the back of the hall and then back to her. The third time he did it, Bella blurted, "What?" before she could stop herself.

Everyone stopped talking and looked at her. Alice giggled.

"Is that a problem, Bella?" Mr. Harper asked.

_Oh God, what now?_

"Sorry, is what a problem?"

"Walking down the aisle with Carlisle."

_Walking down the aisle with-_

"What?" she cried.

"When I pronounce Charlie and Esme man and wife, they will leave and you and Carlisle will follow behind them." Mr. Harper spoke slowly, probably hoping he wouldn't have to repeat himself a third time.

"Oh, no. That's not a problem," Bella muttered.

"Excellent."

While the soon to be bride and groom spoke with the JP, Carlisle motioned for Bella to follow him. They carefully snuck away and Carlisle pulled her into the coat room. He pressed her back against the door, kissing her.

"Do you know how hard it's been to keep my hands off you these past few days?" he murmured against her lips.

"Yes."

His hands moved up her bare legs and under her skirt. He looped his fingers around the band of her thong and pulled it down. The panties slowly dropped down her legs and landed around her feet.

Bella quickly undid his slacks, pushing them and his boxers out of the way. His cock throbbed in front of her, begging for attention.

She wrapped her hand around him and he groaned. He kicked off his pants and underwear and turned her.

"Bend over and hold onto the seat of that chair," he told her.

If Bella hadn't already been soaking wet, hearing him say that would have been all she needed. She braced her hands on the chair and spread her legs. Carlisle slid into her and groaned.

"Four days is too long to go without you, Isabella," he whispered.

He held her hips and she had to bite her lip to stifle her moans as he rocked into her. He quickened the pace and began thrusting harder into her. Much too soon for her liking she felt herself clamping around him with her orgasm which pushed him to come as well.

He leaned down and kissed the spot between her shoulder blades, before getting dressed again.

"Mind if I keep these?" he asked, picking up her thong.

She laughed. "As long as you promise not to wear them."

He chucked and tucked them into his pocket.

The knock on the door stilled them both.

"Bella," Alice whispered. "Esme is looking for you two."

"You better go," Carlisle said. "I'll follow right after."

Bella nodded and cracked the door open. Alice motioned the coast was clear, and she quickly slipped out.

"What does Esme want?"

"No idea."

They had just entered the main part of the hall when Esme caught up to them.

"Bella, there you are! I have someone I want you to meet," she cried excitedly. "Where's Carlisle?"

"He's coming."

Alice tried to keep a straight face, but failed.

"Who do you want me to meet, Esme?" Bella asked, shooting Alice a death stare.

Esme acted as if she didn't hear her. "Don't move. I'm going to look for Carlisle."

Alice looked at Bella and raised an eyebrow.

"What's all that about?"

Bella shook her head just as she caught sight of two young men talking to her father.

"Who's that?" Alice asked, also noticing the new comers.

"Oh my God!" Bella gasped, grabbing Alice's arm. "That has to be Carlisle's son!"

"Really? How do you know that?"

"I don't, but whom else would Esme want me to meet and then hurry off to get Carlisle?"

"Hmm. Which one do you think is him?" Alice craned her neck to get a better look.

"I don't know…. The blond one?"

Alice tucked the corner of her mouth in thoughtfully. "He looks nothing like Carlisle."

"Neither does the other one. The blond one has more of his hair color."

Alice rolled her eyes. "Like that means anything. They both look like they've been dipped in a bucket full of yummy, though."

"Really, Alice, where do you come up with this?"

"It's a gift." Alice grinned.

"They're coming over here!" Bella squealed.

"Ow! That's human flesh you're grabbing!" Alice yanked her arm away.

"What if that is his son? What are we suppose to say?"

"Well, I realize being Carlisle's son might mean that he's part god, but I think 'hello' is still okay."

"Shut up!"

Bella watched as the pair walked towards them. Neither one looked anything like Carlisle. The blond was tall, not really lanky, but not all that muscular either. His eyes were a pale blue and his nose had a slight bend to it, as if it had been broken once.

The other one had hair almost the color of bronze. He was just as tall as his friend, maybe just under six feet, but not as built. Bella figured he didn't hit the gym very often. Unlike his partner, his nose was straight, but it was his smile that had a sexy crookedness to it. And his eyes-

Bella gasped when she saw his eyes. They were the exact pair of emerald green eyes she had been staring into all week.

There was no mistaken who this was.

She was about to meet-

"Hello," he said, before she could finish her thought. "I'm Edward Cullen."

_**Please, review away. I love reading them! **_


	9. Secrets and Lies

_I know it's been awhile. This month has been totally crazy so I haven't had that much time to write. The next chapter is almost done though, so the wait won't be too long._

_**As always, SM owns all things Twilight.**_

He was soft spoken. His voice was as smooth as velvet. It was almost hypnotizing. His mouth turned up into a crooked grin as Bella stared at him.

A warm rush ran through her at that grin. Bella's reaction to Carlisle suddenly came rushing back to her. Father and son shared more than just the same color of eyes it seemed.

Somewhere deep inside her she felt panicked.

It was almost as if someone had poured ice water through her veins and the warm rush vanished. She had no reason to feel this way, but somehow, Bella knew none of this would end well.

All because of that grin.

She forced herself to smile and acknowledge his introduction.

"I'm Bella."

"I know. Esme's told me a lot about you."

"That hardly seems fair," she said, surprised by the news, "considering I've been told very little about you."

Edward's lips twitched as if his smile was going to disappear any second. "Maybe we can change that."

The overly excited fairy next to Bella cleared her throat.

"Oh, sorry. This is Alice Brandon," Bella introduced.

"Alice." Edward smiled and titled his head toward his friend. "Jasper Whitelock."

"Do you attend Juilliard with Edward?" Alice asked leaning closer to Jasper.

Jasper smiled down at her in a shy kind of way and shook his head.

_Oh, this poor boy stood no chance against Alice. She would devour him._

"Edward and I were neighbours as kids. We pretty much grew up together."

"In L.A.?" Bella asked.

"No." Edward looked at her puzzled. "In New York."

_Edward grew up in New York?_

"Oh. Carlisle mentioned he was moving to Seattle from L.A. so I just presumed…" Bella let her sentence trail off because of the look Edward had given her. It was like he was disgusted with what she'd just said.

"He moved us out there when I was fourteen," Edward explained, his voice full of bitterness. "L.A. is full of fakes, so it suits my father just fine."

Bella and Alice looked at each other both clearly shocked. Had he really just said that to two people he didn't know? What kind of person did that?

Bella thought Carlisle might have been exaggerating the anger Edward felt towards him. Even now that she saw it for herself she couldn't really believe it. How could he hate his father so much just because he wasn't around all the time?

There had to be something more to it.

"Edward," Carlisle said coming up behind Bella. "I wasn't aware you were coming. It's good to see you, son."

Edward's smile slid into a smirk. "I bet."

Carlisle glanced at Bella before turning to Jasper. "Jasper, it's been awhile. How've you been?"

"No complaints. Mom and dad say hi."

"Next time I'm visiting Edward I'll have to stop by and see them."

"Guess there's no reason for them to clear their calendar anytime soon," Edward muttered.

_Wow._

Bella had an overwhelming feeling to reach back and squeeze Carlisle's hand to comfort him.

"It's good to see you Jasper, but why didn't you bring Tanya, Edward?"

Edward shrugged. "Things didn't work out."

"Oh, that's too bad. I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well, shit happens."

The tension between father and son was so thick, Bella was sure even the sharpest knife wouldn't cut through it. She was beginning to feel more and more uncomfortable with each passing second and wanted nothing more than to escape.

"So, Edward," Alice said, "Carlisle told us you're a pretty awesome musician."

Edward smiled. "My father used the worse 'awesome'?"

"Maybe not that exact word," Alice laughed, "but the meaning was still the same."

"Accomplished, I think is the word Esme used," Bella piped up. "Either way, it's clear they're both extremely proud of you."

Edward looked at her and then at Carlisle.

"I've never doubted how proud my aunt and father are of me when it comes to my music," he said. "It's really the only thing we've ever felt the same about."

Bella peeked at Carlisle and saw the same sad smile she'd witnessed many times in the past week.

"Obviously Edward's talented with his fingers," Alice said. "What are your talents, Jasper?"

_Leave it to Alice. _

Jasper's cheeks turned a light shade of pink.

"Uh, I've trained in martial arts for a few years. I've won a couple of competitions, too."

Alice grinned. "Impressive. Maybe you can show me some of your moves." She winked.

Despite the darkening color of his face, Jasper smiled at Alice and his eyes suddenly had a mischievous gleam.

Maybe Alice was in for a surprise of her own.

Bella turned to the sound of clicking heels and saw a beaming Esme making her way towards them. Her smile faltered some when she saw Edward and Carlisle's faces.

"What's wrong?" she asked immediately.

"Nothing," Carlisle quickly said. His smile seemed forced and was gone as quick as it had come.

"Well, we're finished here," she said, "so we can go to dinner now." She looked at Edward. "Have you and Jasper made arrangements to stay somewhere yet?"

"Yeah, we're at the hotel. We figured your place would be pretty crowded," he said looking at Bella.

"Edward, we always have room for you."

"Thanks, but we're good." He smiled warmly at his aunt.

"Okay, so everything's set," Charlie said, joining the group. "The decorators will be in tonight to do their thing and all we have to do is show up tomorrow."

He put his arm around Esme and smiled at everyone, including Carlisle, which amazed Bella.

The last few days had been strained to say the least. Charlie had been eyeing Carlisle like a bulls eye he desperately wanted to hit. Aware of this, Carlisle had taken extra care to keep at least five feet between him and Bella at all times Charlie was in the room.

"Isabella, the man threatened to shoot me!" Carlisle had cried when she'd asked him about it.

"He asked if you hunted," she corrected him trying not to laugh.

"Exactly. What do you think happens to all these men who go missing during hunting trips? It's not wild animals, or vampires, werewolves, or any other mythical creature. It's angry fathers getting revenge on the men who are dating their daughters."

"Then you have nothing to worry about," she told him, even though her heart soared at him saying they were dating.

"How do you figure?"

"Because we're not dating. We're just having amazing sex."

She'd giggled to herself as she walked away, listening to him cry after her, "I'm sure that would go over so much better!"

This was the closest they'd been together around Charlie in days, and the fact that he didn't reach out and strangle Carlisle made Bella breathe a little easier.

"Edward," Charlie said, "I know it means a lot to Esme to have you here. We're both glad you could make it."

"Esme's done more for me than anyone else," Edward said shooting Carlisle a look. "I wouldn't have missed this for anything."

Bella felt Carlisle stiffen beside her. She was sure if she looked at him she'd see the face of a man who'd just been punched in the gut.

Why did he feel the need to hurt his father so much?

Bella opened her mouth to say something to the ignorant man standing in front of her, but was interrupted before she could even make a sound.

"We better get to the restaurant if we're going to make the reservation," Carlisle declared.

Bella looked at him and the slight shake of his head told her it was no accident he'd cut her off.

"Carlisle's right," Esme said. "Let's go eat and catch up."

Edward said something to Jasper and Bella took the opportunity to talk to Carlisle.

"What he's doing-" she whispered.

"It's okay. Just forget it. Please."

She wanted to protest, but his face stopped her. He wasn't just trying to reassure her, he really did mean it when he said it was okay.

_What was with him?_

"Carlisle…"

"Please," he begged, "just leave it alone."

"Fine. Whatever," she mumbled before turning to Alice. "Ready?"

"You're going too, right?" she asked Jasper, batting her eye lashes.

Bella rolled her eyes. _Give it a rest._

Jasper smiled. "Right behind you."

"She'll like that," Bella blurted.

Edward laughed. Alice smacked her. Jasper looked amused. Bella flushed and grabbed Alice's arm.

"We'll see you at the restaurant," Bella said having to practically drag Alice away from them and to the car.

"Isn't that Jasper a fine piece of meat?" she asked buckling her seatbelt. "It's too bad you're doing daddy. Edward's pretty yummy, too. Bet he's good in the sack."

"I don't even want to know how you've come to that conclusion."

"Hello? He's a piano player. All musicians are good in bed."

"Sweetie, just because they have groupies doesn't mean they're good in bed."

Alice shrugged. "Bet _he_ is though."

Bella sighed. "Why is everything about sex with you?"

"This coming from the woman getting some non-stop this week?" Alice accused.

"Maybe you want to look past what's in his pants."

Alice's eyes got wide as she faked astonishment. "You mean there's more to guys than their penises?"

Bella shook her head. "Grow up, Alice."

"What's got your panties in a twist?"

"Did you not notice how Edward treats Carlisle?"

Alice snorted. "Its kind hard to miss."

"It just irritates me that he lets him treat him like that. It's like Carlisle think he deserves it."

"Why do you care? It's really none of your business anyway," Alice mumbled while applying lipstick.

"Because I care about Carlisle," Bella admitted softly.

There. She'd said it out loud. To Alice of all people. Bella prepared herself for the lecture she was about to get.

"That's obvious, Bella," Alice simply said. "But it's still none of your business."

"It could be."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Bella waited a minute before answering. "We connected on a deeper level at his house."

"Yeah, he shook you out of your comfort zone."

"No, it was more than that. He said stuff."

"What kind of stuff?" Alice asked eagerly.

"He said that he felt confused because being with me felt too good. That I made him feel my age again with his entire life to be with me." Bella glanced at Alice and saw her lips form a perfect "O" shape. "And that the more we're together the more intense it gets."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

"You two must be having greater sex than you let on."

"Alice!" Bella groaned.

She laughed. "I'm sorry, but c'mon, Bella it's me. Of course that screams fantastic sex."

"You're impossible," Bella grumbled, parking the car.

"Maybe, but don't start looking for 'until death do us part' vows that aren't really there," Alice cautioned.

"I'm not."

_How many times did they have to have this conversation? _

"If you say so, but if you ask me-"

"Which I didn't."

"I think you should move onto fresh meat." Alice nodded at the car that had just pulled up beside them. "You've had your fun with Dr. Hotty; now try Junior on for size."

"Ugh! Oh my god, Alice! I'm not going to sleep with his son. That's sick."

"It's not sick."

"You're sick for thinking it's not sick," Bella cried.

Alice shrugged. "Your loss."

Bella watched as she got out of the car and sauntered over to Jasper. She looped her arm through his, said something in his ear and laughed when the words made him blush.

Bella resisted the urge to roll her eyes for the hundredth time that night. She reached into the backseat for her purse and jumped when someone tapped on her window.

She turned to find Edward leaning against the passenger door of his car, hands in his pockets, his lips turned up in that crooked smile.

Was there any part of Carlisle in him besides his eyes? Edward seemed so hard, so judgemental. Where was the compassionate side to him? Was this all his mother?

Why did she even care?

Bella yanked her keys from the ignition and got out of the car.

"Seems like our friends have already paired off," Edward said.

Bella looked behind him and caught Alice and Jasper mid-tongue tangle. She scowled.

"You don't agree with them hooking up?"

"I'm not a fan of PDA."

_Liar._

Okay, there may have been a few public encounters between her and Carlisle, but it had never been in front of anyone.

"What are you a fan of?" Edward asked.

Bella looked back at him. "Chocolate."

"Ah, the key to every girl's heart," he mocked, batting his eyelashes.

"Yeah, I'm pretty easy."

Edward raised his eyebrows and grinned wider. Bella dropped her gaze and blushed.

_She did not just say that._

"I think there's some chocolate in the car," Edward teased. "And if not it can't be that far of a walk to get some."

Bella smirked. "Don't bother. Even the richest chocolate wouldn't work for you."

"Ouch." Edward placed his hand over his heart acting wounded. "And here I thought I was just imagining the hostility you felt towards me."

Bella stared at the grounded, not saying anything.

"Which is kind of funny considering we just met and you really don't know me."

"First impressions count for a lot." She looked at him then. "The way you disrespect your father is rude."

"Sure, but that doesn't explain why _you _feel so hostile towards me." He leaned forward and dropped his voice. "I have a theory."

"Gee, I can't wait to hear it," Bella said dryly.

"You find me attractive."

Bella laughed.

"No, you're very much attracted to me, but you feel guilty because you have a boyfriend or something, so you have to be angry at me so you won't jump me."

"You're very delusional."

"You can admit you find me sexy. I promise it will be our little secret." He grinned.

Bella crossed her arms.

"See, a defensive move," he pointed out. "Okay, I'll go first. I think you're hot and the more off limits you seem to be the hotter it makes you." He winked. "Your turn."

"Fine. You're good looking, but I'm not attracted to you. In fact," she paused to look him up and down, "Donald Trump has a better chance of turning me on than you do."

"How do I know you don't find The Donald sexy?"

"Oh yeah, baby, his comb over sends shivers up my spine."

He chuckled. "It seems to work for the ladies."

"Gross." She looked at him and couldn't help but smile. "What do you know about me?" she asked curious. "You said Esme told you about me."

He stared at her for a few seconds before answering. "I know your parents split when you were young. You moved to Phoenix with your mother and you still live there and attend university. You very rarely visit Forks and are only back now because of the wedding. You're single, as far as Esme knows, and you recently got out of a bad relationship and are too burned to try out another one."

"That's fairly predictable," she said, annoyed that he knew about James. "It's the same thing everyone knows."

"So how do I get to know the things others don't?" he asked seductively.

"You don't. Sorry, you're just not that important."

"I see. Saved for the boyfriend, huh?" He didn't even sound offended.

"I thought you said I was single."

"I said as far as Esme knows," he corrected her. "Boyfriend?"

She hesitated. "No."

"Girlfriend?" He grinned.

"No!"

"Well, that answer was a lot quicker which means there is someone, yes?"

"It's complicated," Bella sighed.

He half rolled his eyes, almost as if he was bored. "What a typical lazy answer. I hate 'it's complicated'."

"Why?" Bella asked, taken aback.

"'It's complicated' is just an easy way out of actually having to define your relationship. It usually means both people involved don't have the balls to stand up and say this is what I want, or don't want, and if you can't give it to me I'm out. It's the people in the relationship that make it complicated, not the relationship itself."

Bella stared at him, unsure of what to say. She couldn't disagree because he did make sense, but she couldn't agree because she and Carlisle _were_ complicated.

Weren't they?

They had to stay quiet and secretive. They couldn't come out and openly date.

Could they?

_Why not?_

Charlie for one. The distance involved. The fact that he had a son just a couple of years younger than her for another.

Even to herself, they sounded like lame excuses. Was Edward right? Was it her and Carlisle making things complicated and not the situation?

"Makes you think, doesn't it?" Edward suddenly said.

_You're right, Edward. It is us that make it complicated. By the way, when I say us I mean your father and I. Yep, that's right I've been fucking the stuffing out of your father for the past week, and he actually has a pair of my panties inside his pocket at this very moment. What do you think about that? Is it complicated for you? Would you have rather I kept that to myself, or are you glad I had the balls to stand up and tell you what's really happening? _

Bella opened her mouth to answer when she saw Carlisle get out of his car. He started walking towards the restaurant, but stopped when he spotted the two of them. Bella watched him watch them until he finally caught her eye, gave a small smile and continued inside.

"Why do you hate your father?" she asked watching him walk away. When he'd disappeared inside she looked back at Edward.

His eyes darkened and he pushed away from the car, smirking. "Sorry, but you're just not important enough to know that."

"I know more than you think," she called to him as he walked away.

He opened the restaurant door and lingered long enough to tell her, "You obviously don't know as much as you think if you have to ask me that."

Bella grasped her purse harder to keep from throwing it at the already closed door.

_What a smug son of a bitch_, she thought, stomping into the restaurant. Her irritation only increased when she found their table and saw the only chair left was besides Edward.

No, not just beside him. _Between _him and Carlisle.

Bella silently groaned. It was literally the last place she wanted to be.

"Bella?" Esme asked. "Are you alright?"

Bella momentary looked at Carlisle and Edward. "Fine." She slid into her seat and grabbed the menu to help avoid both pairs of green eyes staring her down.

"How's school, Edward?" Esme inquired.

"Great. There's a music program my professor wants me to think about attending over the summer in L.A."

"You never told me about that," Carlisle said.

Edward shrugged. "You never asked."

"I ask all the time how your schooling is going," Carlisle argued. "You never volunteer information."

"I guess I just figure you're not really interested," Edward answered coolly.

"How can you think that?"

"Oh, I dunno-"

"Is it kiwi or pineapple that makes me sick, Bella?" Alice suddenly asked. Everyone looked from Bella to her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your argument, but we were out one night and I had one of the fruit and got incredibly sick."

"I think it had more to do with the alcohol you consumed rather than the fruit," Bella contradicted. "It was kiwi, though."

"Awesome." Alice closed her menu and beamed at everyone. "I'm having the teriyaki chicken then."

"Not very subtle, is she?" Edward chuckled beside Bella reviewing his menu.

Bella ignored him, focusing on her menu instead.

"So, are you going to L.A.?" Carlisle asked after a few minutes.

Bella sighed, ready for round two.

"I haven't decided yet."

"You'd be close to family for the summer," Esme jumped in. "And your dad just bought the house."

"Seattle is still a little far from L.A.," Edward said.

"Not as far as New York," Bella muttered.

Edward looked at her, but didn't comment.

"The house has plenty of room if you wanted to stay with me, son," Carlisle said hopefully.

"That kind of defeats the purpose of going to the program."

Bella saw Esme shake her head and look at Carlisle in an almost chastening way. Like she didn't agree with something Carlisle had done.

What was that about? It was Edward that was acting like an ass.

Bella took a quick peek at Carlisle. He was talking to Jasper, but he looked tired and… conflicted. She shifted in her seat until her leg bumped his. They were only knee to knee but that small bit of contact made her feel like she was comforting him. He gently bumped her back.

Bella inhaled deeply, immediately feeling better.

"Will the complicated non boyfriend be joining you at the wedding tomorrow, Bella?" Edward asked after their order had been taken.

_So much for feeling better._

The question was low enough that only Carlisle heard. Bella noticed he stopped talking, and even though he didn't look at them directing, was listening to the answer to the question.

"I brought Alice as my date," Bella told Edward.

"Hmm." Edward looked at Alice, who was leaning all over Jasper. "I think you've been dumped."

"I wouldn't worry about it. When it comes to men, Alice has the attention span of a toddler with toys. Just one won't satisfy her for long and she will soon lose interest."

Edward laughed, drawing eyes his way. Esme in particular looked interested in what they were talking about.

"Still, you may need another date."

"Thanks, but I think I'll go solo and keep my options open."

Edward shrugged. "Have it your way. Either way still leaves me as an option."

"Trust me, you're not an option," Bella muttered looking away.

"Are you boys sure you won't stay with us?" Esme asked once more as dinner was ending." It's not ideal, but you can always crash on the floor. I'm sure we have an air mattress somewhere."

"We're fine at the hotel," Edward assured her, smiling. "Really Esme, its fine."

"Okay, I'll stop nagging." She turned to Charlie. "I'll be right back." She kissed his cheek and hurried away from the table.

Bella looked at the empty seat on her left and wondered where Carlisle had gone to. He'd excused himself awhile ago and hadn't returned.

"Where are you going, Bells" Charlie asked when she stood.

"I forgot my cell in the car. I'll be right back."

Carlisle was nowhere in the restaurant. She went outside thinking maybe he'd gone out for some air. The front of the lot was empty, but Bella heard voices coming from the side of the building, right were she'd parked her car.

"-he's old enough to know now, Carlisle."

_Was that Esme?_

"I can't tell him. It's been too long and it would hurt him more now than ever," Carlisle argued.

"He's an adult; he can handle it. Carlisle, I know why you did it when he was a child, but it makes no sense anymore," Esme said sympathetically. "This anger he has towards you is misplaced."

"Its better he's angry at me than hate himself," Carlisle insisted.

Bella stopped a few feet away from the end of the building.

_What had Carlisle done?_

"This nonsense is going to end," Esme snapped, suddenly angry.

Bella jumped, not expecting to hear her raise her voice. She'd never seen Esme angry before.

"I'm tired of seeing you hurt. I'm sick of this tension between the two of you. Either you tell him, or I will," she threatened.

Maybe she shouldn't be eavesdropping. Esme sounded pretty upset as it was. What would she do if she found Bella listening?

She started to back away, but ended up tripping over the heels she was wearing. She cried out, catching herself just before she hit the sidewalk. Unfortunately, she did not go unnoticed.

"Bella?" Carlisle rushed forward, helping her to her feet. "Are you okay?"

"Fine." She dusted her hands off, avoiding his eyes. "Stupid heels."

Carlisle stepped away from her. "What are you doing out here?"

"I, uh, forgot my cell in the car." She pointed to the vehicle. "I came to get it."

"I should get back in," Esme said. She looked at Carlisle. "I meant what I said."

"Leave it alone, Esme," he ordered.

She looked like she wanted to argue, but quickly glanced at Bella and sighed. She shook her head and walked away.

"Let me see your hands," Carlisle said tenderly reaching for her.

"It's nothing. Just a couple of scratches."

But she let him take her hands anyway. He gently ran his finger over her palm, dislodging the few tiny pebbles that remained.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

He smiled. "Why wouldn't I be? I'm not the one who fell."

"Carlisle… I heard you and Esme," she admitted.

"I know." He continued to rub her hand, not looking at her.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He sighed heavily. "There's nothing to talk about."

"Sounded like there was to me."

"It's nothing you have to concern yourself with, Isabella," he said, dropping her hands.

Bella felt like a scolded child.

"Well, excuse me for being concerned," she snapped. "I'm sorry for trying to help."

"You can't help."

"You don't know that unless you tell me what's wrong."

"No one can help," he said turning away form her. "I did this. I made the mess and only I can fix it, but I can't because it would mean hurting Edward."

"What did you do?"

"It doesn't matter," he said sadly.

"Fine, shut me out," Bella said, hurt. "But you know what? I think you underestimate your son. I know I've only known him all of five minutes, but he doesn't seem like the fragile type."

"You can't possibly understand," Carlisle muttered.

"Then help me understand." _Great, she was practically begging. _"What did you do that is so wrong? Why do you let him treat you like crap and just accept it like you deserve it?"

"Because I turned him into the person he is," Carlisle cried, spinning around to face her. "I've lied to him his entire life."

_Okay, not expecting that._

"What do you mean?"

"Everything he believes, everything he thinks he knows is a lie. A lie I created to protect him."

"You're going to have to stop talking in circles. What lie?" Bella asked.

"When Edward was a child and started asking about his mother I had to tell him something, but I couldn't tell him the truth. How could I look at my son and tell him his mother didn't want him? So I lied and told him I drove her away. That she left because of me and that I wouldn't let her take him."

Bella's mouth hung open in surprise. Here she was expecting something horrible, and yet it was…

What was it?

Carlisle had lied out of love. Edward had believed him all these years and now because of that lie blamed him for not having his mother around. Slowly, Bella caught on. The lie caused Edward to hate his father.

It _was_ horrible. Horrible, but fixable.

All Carlisle had to do was tell him what really happened and they could begin to fix what had broken so long ago.

"You have to tell him," Bella said. "Esme's right. He's not a child anymore, he can handle it."

"I can't do that," Carlisle said.

"Why not? It will help. You can have a real relationship with him. He'll know you're not to blame and-"

"How would you feel if Charlie suddenly told you that your mother hadn't wanted you?" Carlisle asked interrupting her. "That you were an inconvenience before you were even born because you didn't fit into her perfectly planned life? That she compared having a child to the same as having a crippling disease because she felt they both took over your life and changed you so much you no longer knew who you were.

"How would that make you feel, Isabella?"

Tears stung Bella's eyes. She couldn't imagine being told that, but that wasn't the reason she was crying. The pain she saw in Carlisle's face as he tried to explain it to her hurt her more than anything.

"Don't you see?" he asked, begging for understanding. "I can't do that to him. I can't hurt him like that. He'll feel like there's something wrong with him."

"But he's hurting you," Bella whispered, tears spilling down her cheeks.

"It's better than hurting him," Carlisle repeated. He held her face and wiped the tears away. "You can't say anything."

"Esme said-"

"She won't say anything either," he said. "She's been threatening for years to tell him."

"Carlisle, he'd get over it. In time he'd understand why you did it," Bella said, trying to persuade him.

"Please, Isabella." He lifted her head to make her look at him. "This is my choice. You can't say anything."

Looking into his eyes and seeing all the pain there made it hard for her to agree, especially when it seemed so simple for him to fix it. But she bit her lip and nodded.

"Thank you." He kissed her forehead, the tip of her nose and finally her lips. Bella wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his chest. "I'll see you inside," he said and pulled away.

She nodded again, wiping the rest of her tears away. As she watched him walk away, she realized she had it wrong before. This is what Esme meant when she had told her he was damaged.

It wasn't because of some woman who'd trampled his heart twenty years ago. That woman had given him something he loved more than his own happiness.

But he'd ruined the love between his only child and himself with a lie. He broke his own heart.

He'd damaged himself.

_**Reviews make this all worth it so please, review away. And thanks for sticking with it!**_


	10. Babysitting Edward Cullen

_**Thanks to everyone who continues to review! This chapter was so long I had to cut it into two. So the next chapter is already complete!**_

_**Of course SM owns all things Twilight.**_

"Are you okay?"

Bella turned, surprised to find the concern came from Edward.

"I'm fine." She turned away, wiping her cheeks.

"Non boyfriend troubles?"

"Why would you think that?"

"You come out here for your phone and now you're crying."

"I'm not crying," Bella sniffed.

"Sorry, my mistake. The tears confused me."

She didn't have to turn around to know he was smiling when he said it. She could hear it in his voice.

"What are you doing out here?" she asked.

"I needed some air. It's a little suffocating in there," he said standing beside her.

"Yeah, you're surrounded by people who love and care about you. That must be horrible for you," she said sarcastically looking at him.

"Does that include you?" He grinned.

Bella shook her head and looked away with a sigh. She could feel his eyes on her.

"How well have you gotten to know my father?" he suddenly asked.

Bella's stomach dropped. The simple question sent her heart pounding and her legs felt like they had turned to rubber. She tried to swallow over the lump in her throat.

"What?" she asked.

"You're very curious of our relationship and why I feel the way I do about him."

Bella shrugged. "Anyone would be."

"Maybe." He stared at her. "But not everyone would defend him like you do."

"I… I don't defend him," Bella disagreed weakly.

"Yes, you do. It's as if you're positive I'm the wrong one and my feelings are unjustified."

_They are._

"And then there was that the little comment about you knowing more than I think," he said.

Bella closed her eyes, cursing herself. Everything she knew Edward wouldn't know. She did not want to have this conversation.

"I'm curious about what you know," Edward continued.

Bella looked at him.

"What makes you think I know anything?"

Edward look confused, saying, "You said-"

"Did it ever occur to you that I just said that to see what you'd tell me?"

"Why would you do that?"

"Um, to see what you'd tell me," she repeated slowly. "C'mon, everyone can feel the tension between you and Carlisle. I just wanted to know why it was there."

"Wanted to know? So, you don't anymore?" he asked sounding unconvinced.

Bella shrugged like it was no big deal.

"Not really. I have my own problems to deal with."

Edward examined her closely. He didn't look like he believed her at all.

"So, my dad hasn't told you anything about me?" he asked.

Bella bit her lip, debating how to answer that. If she said no, it made it seem like Edward didn't matter enough to Carlisle to mention. If she said yes, she'd have to answer his questions and possibly make up lies on the spot that could get her into trouble later.

"Just the basic stuff. He talked about your music, you don't see each other very often because you go to school on the east coast, and that you don't get along entirely well. Listen," she said turning to him before he could ask her anything else, "we don't talk a whole lot when we're together."

_At least that wasn't a lie._

"He just seems like a very private person and I didn't want to pry," she explained further. "But like anyone I was curious and just wanted to see if you'd tell me."

"No other reason?"

"What other reason would there be?" she asked acting confused.

Instead of answering he asked, "Why were you crying?"

Bella cocked her hip to the side and tried to look annoyed.

"If you want to know about me it's only fair I know about you," Edward said grinning.

"You just don't have respect for personal boundaries," she accused.

Edward's grin turned into a smirk. "Perhaps, but then you want to invade my personal boundaries, too" He winked.

"Not the way you want."

"We'll see." He raised an eyebrow waiting for her answer.

Bella inhaled deeply trying to think of a way to stick as close to the truth as possible.

"I found out something that upset me," she said simply.

"Obviously. What was it?"

"Someone I care about is taking the blame for something that's not their fault."

"What is it?" He took a step closer to her, waiting for her answer.

Bella shook her head. "That's not my secret to tell."

"Oh, so it's a secret?" he said.

_Crap._

"Why did it upset you?"

"Why are you the only one asking questions?" she fired back.

That crooked grin almost glowed when he smiled. "No one's stopping you. Besides, you just asked one."

Bella rolled her eyes.

"There you are!" Alice cried. Bella turned around. "I thought you got lost."

"Lost in Forks?" Bella laughed.

Alice shrugged. "I guess it depends on your distractions, but it might be possible," she said looking Edward up and down.

Bella glared at her.

"Actually, we were just talking," Edward said, amused.

"About?"

"How did you put it?" Edward looked at Bella. "Invading personal boundaries?"

"You want to invade Edward's personal boundaries?" Alice asked.

"No!"

"She does." Edward nodded.

"I do not!" Bella cried giving him the same glare as she had Alice. "I said _you _have a problem respecting people's personal boundaries."

"Edward has problems respecting people?" Jasper faked surprise. "I never would have guessed."

Edward rolled his eyes.

"Real funny, dude."

"Edward and Jasper asked if we wanted to hang out with them back at the hotel," Alice told Bella, rocking back and forth on her heels.

"Oh." Bella looked from Jasper to Edward. "Tomorrow is a big day and I feel pretty tired."

"Bella, it's eight o'clock. Is your pacemaker acting up?" Alice snipped.

"You can go, but I'm tired. Besides, there are probably a million pre-wedding details Esme needs help with."

Alice clicked her tongue.

"Can I talk to you?" she asked grabbing Bella's arm not waiting for an answer. "What is your problem?" Alice asked as soon as they were alone.

"Nothing. I told you."

"Look Bella, I'm glad you've let loose this week and got down and dirty with Carlisle, but I have needs, too."

Bella made a face.

"I really don't want to hear about your needs, Alice."

"I've had to listen to a lot more from you, Bella," Alice shot back. Bella blushed remembering the shower. "I haven't gotten laid in over a week. A week! That's seven days, Bella. No, more than seven days! You know me; I need sex like I need oxygen."

"So, basically you're suffocating," Bella said, amused.

"Exactly!" Alice cried so loud the guys looked at them.

"By not going I'm really doing you a favour then, Alice. You can't…_breathe _with me there. I won't allow it," she added because she knew Alice would if she let her.

Alice thought about that.

"You're right." Her eyes lit up. "You're right! Don't come."

"Great-"

"But take Edward with you," Alice added.

"What?" Bella cried.

_The lack of oxygen must really be messing with her mind. _

"It doesn't help to have him there either. So, take him with you."

"And what am I supposed to do with him?" Bella hissed darting a glance at Edward.

"I know what I would do with him if I were you," Alice giggled. Bella glared. "I don't care what you do to him, or with him, or whatever," Alice said, impatiently, "just get him away from us for a few hours."

"Hours?" Bella whined.

"Bella, just do it!"

"How do _you_ suggest _I_ suggest he comes with me?" Bella asked. "I haven't exactly been nice to him and now all of a sudden I want to spend more time with him?

"I don't know," Alice moaned. "Please Bella, I really need-"

"Fine." Bella held up her hands. "I'll think of something," she grumbled. "But if he tries something-"

"You'll enjoy it despite the fuss you'll make." Alice beamed, pulled Bella in for a quick hug and then danced back to Jasper leaving Bella stammering.

_Now what?_

Bella sighed, racking her brain for an excuse she could use to get Edward to come with her. The last thing she wanted was to show up at home alone with Edward in tow. What would Carlisle think?

Alice owed her big time for this.

"Um, Bella?"

_Crap._

She turned to Edward.

"Did you just get the same awkward leave us alone plea I did?" he asked.

Bella sighed, grateful she wouldn't have to bring it up. "Yeah, kinda. Only mine was more of a demand than a plea."

"And you agreed?" He sounded surprised.

"Like I had a choice," Bella mumbled.

"Everyone has a choice. We could still leave them alone, but you can go back to Charlie's and I'll go hang out wherever people hang out around here." He grinned. "It won't be the same without your pleasant company of course and we won't be able to continue our conversation."

"It was more like a game of twenty questions than a conversation."

"Fine." He shrugged. "It just means you won't get your turn. I know you're dying to have a turn." His eyes roamed over her body and he smiled wickedly.

_He so did not mean a turn at twenty questions.__Alice was going to pay for this dearly. _

"Let's go," she finally said turning to her car.

He reached for her arm, stopping her.

"Maybe we should take my car." he suggested.

"Why?"

"So you don't have to drive me back to the hotel and Alice has your car to leave whenever she wants, too."

Bella dropped her car keys in his open palm with no comment. Oh, she wanted to complain. The whole thing seemed like a trap, but it was a very logical trap. One she couldn't think of a way out of.

"My car is unlocked," he told her. "I'll give these to Alice."

Bella felt like stomping off like a sulking child. Why couldn't Alice just get a room of her own instead of asking her to baby-sit Edward.

Did she not realize the awkward position she put her in by doing this?

Or didn't she care as long as she got laid?

"Penny for your thoughts?" Carlisle asked suddenly beside her.

"I'm not sure you want to know," Bella muttered.

"If I didn't I wouldn't have asked," he said softly.

"Alice asked me to hang out with Edward so she can have…_alone _time with Jasper," she said dryly.

Bella looked up at him. She wanted to see something. Jealousy. Confusion. Uncertainty. Anything to show her he cared and didn't like the idea.

But she saw nothing.

Just the same calm expression that he always wore.

_What the hell did that mean?!_

"It wasn't my idea," she started to explain. "Alice…"

Wait. Why was she explaining something that he clearly didn't care about?

If he couldn't even voice his objections about this, why should she feel guilty over spending time with his son?

She wouldn't.

Or she'd try not to at least.

"Well," he finally said, "if you come back to the house I'll see you there. Remember what I asked you though," he added quietly.

"Right." Tears stung her eyes as she yanked open the car door making him step back.

If he had told her he was going to be with someone - platonic or not - she would have been jealous. And all he cared about was her keeping his ridiculous secret. And it really was ridiculous. All this could be resolved if he'd just tell Edward the truth.

She slammed the door and looked down at her hands so he wouldn't see her cry. Out of the corner of her eye she saw what looked like him reach for the door and then drop his hands.

She looked up in time to see him walking away just as Edward opened his door and slid in beside her.

"They promised they wouldn't be too long," he told her smiling.

"Knowing Alice she'll probably start before they even reach the hotel," Bella grumbled. "They better not stain my car."

Edward laughed so hard he startled her. She stared at him as he laid his head against the headrest, eyes closed, catching his breath.

It had been the first real emotion, besides his anger, that she'd seen from him. He opened his eyes and looked at her. They were brighter, more alive. They had lost the hardness that had been there since she met him. His smile was relaxed making his entire face change.

His guard was down. For a second he had forgotten to keep his defences up and it was in this moment she saw the part of himself he tried to hide.

She saw the gentle side. The side that was most vulnerable. The part of him that needed and wanted to be loved and cared for by the people around him.

It was the part of him he never let show.

She saw Carlisle.

"What?" he asked as she continued to stare at him.

"For a minute there…" _You looked like your father._

She was pretty sure he wouldn't take that as compliment.

"For a minute there what?" he asked again his face slowly turning back into its hard shell.

"You looked human," she finished.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Compared to all the other times I'm not human?" he asked, confused.

"Maybe that was the wrong comparison. You looked like a nice guy."

"Because I laughed?"

"Because it was something real. You've acted like an ass the entire evening."

"Please, don't spare my feelings," he said not at all offended.

"You don't spare Carlisle's."

"See, there you go again," he said sitting up and twisting his body towards her. "Always defending my dad and bringing him into conversations."

_Yeah, Bella. Shut. Up._

She shrugged. "He's the only one you are mean with."

"Why do you care? Why does it bother you so much how I treat my father?"

He stared at her so intensely she became nervous. She couldn't tear her eyes away from his. No matter how much she wanted to look away he held her there.

"_Your father and I have become close. Very close. Intimately close. We've been sneaking off every chance we get to be with each other. It was only supposed to be about sex, but something changed. It wasn't supposed to happen, but it did. That's why I care and why it bothers me. I hate to see the man I've grown incredibly fond of treated like shit."_

Edward leaned back against the door as if he'd heard her thoughts and was shocked.

Wait. They were just thoughts, right? She hadn't really said that out loud had she?

_Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit._

Bella's brain felt scrambled. She couldn't remember speaking, but she couldn't remember _not_ speaking.

Panic set in. What if she had said it? The way he'd been looking at her made it feel like she had been under some spell. And now that he'd relaxed and the spell had broken she couldn't remember a damn thing!

_What the fuck had she just done?!_

Bella looked at Edward and saw that he was watching her closely. Maybe his expression wasn't shock. No, if anything he looked puzzled.

Did that mean she hadn't said it and he was still waiting for a response?

_And how big of an idiot did she look like right now just gaping at him?_

"Bella, you're kind of freaking me out right now," Edward said.

_Right. That big of one. How embarrassing. _

"Sorry, I guess I zoned out." The words rushed out with the breath Bella released.

"Okay," he said drawing out the word.

"Are we going to sit out here all night?" Bella asked changing the subject. "I thought we were going back to the house."

He watched her for a few more seconds before starting the car.

"You never answered my question," he said once they were on the road.

"Which one?"

He looked at her, annoyed.

"You know which one."

_Oh right, that one. _

"Actually, I did. I told you before I think it's disrespectful."

"That still doesn't explain why you care."

"Who's Tanya?" Bella asked suddenly remembering the name. She desperately needed to get him off this topic.

He quickly glanced at her. "What?"

"Who's Tanya?" she repeated. "You're not the only one who gets to ask questions, you know," she added when he didn't answer.

"Tanya is a friend," he said shifting in his seat uncomfortably.

_Oh, Tanya was definitely more than a friend. _

"You said things didn't work out," Bella recalled.

"So?"

"So, that implies she's more than a friend."

"She is always an ex." He shrugged. "That doesn't mean she's not a friend."

"What happened?" Bella asked genially interested.

"Like I said things didn't work out."

"Is this really going to be like pulling teeth?" she snapped, irritated.

He laughed. "That depends. Do I get the pain meds?"

Bella shook her head and looked out the window. She refused to say another word until he gave her something.

Finally, she heard him groan, "What do you want to know?"

She smiled looking back at him. "Everything."

He was quiet a long time before answering.

"I met Tanya at a club two years ago," he finally said. "I was eighteen and she was twenty-four."

"Twenty-four!" Bella cried.

Edward looked at her like she was overreacting.

"Sorry, I just assumed she was your age," she muttered.

"I like older women." He winked at her. "We started talking and I told her I was twenty-two. Fake i.d's come in handy for more than just sneaking into clubs," he laughed.

"She didn't believe you?"

"Not until I showed her. Even then I think she had her suspicions. Anyway," he continued, "we started dating a few weeks later. I didn't think it would be a long term thing so I never bothered telling her the truth. One morning I woke up and it had been six months and I thought it might be time to say something."

"Bet she wasn't happy," Bella guessed.

"That's sort of an understatement. She refused to take my calls for weeks. She even had her friends answer and tell me off just so she wouldn't have to talk to me," he remembered, smiling.

"Why didn't you give up?" Bella asked.

"I did eventually. A week after I stopped calling we ran into each other and finally talked about it. She forgave me and we moved on, although she did keep my age from her friends," he added.

"Why did it end?"

"We have no time for each other right now. She's a ballet dancer for ABC," he explained.

_Okay, officially impressed._

"So, this break up might not be forever," Bella said. "Once things settle down you could work things out."

"Only time will tell."

He looked at her so long Bella was worried they'd crash. She looked out the window and was surprised to see they were in Charlie's driveway.

_When had that happened?_

Bella noticed Esme's car was there, but Charlie's cruiser and Carlisle's Mercedes were missing.

"Looks like Esme's the only one home," Edward said.

"Have you ever been here?"

"Nope."

"You can come in if you want," Bella invited getting out of the car. "I'm sure Alice won't be done with Jasper yet, anyway."

"Are you sure Esme's the only one here?" he asked following her.

"No." Bella turned. "Are you worried you might see your dad?"

"No." He walked closer to her, smiling when he was only a few inches from her. "Just wondering how alone we'll be."

Bella took a step back. "Why would we need to be alone?"

"I can't do the things I want to do to you with an audience. Well, I could," he added, "but I'm not sure how comfortable you'd be with that."

"I'm not comfortable with you doing things to me audience or not," Bella replied. "I'm involved, remember?"

"Involved with someone you're not even sure you're involved with." He looked down at her with amused eyes. "That sounds so complicated."

Bella rolled her eyes.

"You're not even slightly curious about what I want to do to you?" he asked trying to be seductive.

Bella swallowed. "Not in the least."

He grabbed her jacket and gave a gentle tug, making her stumble forward. Instinctively, she reached out to keep from falling and her palms landed on his chest. She inhaled sharply at the contact.

She realized her first impression of him may have been all wrong. He might not look like he worked out, but he definitely felt like he did.

Hard muscle lay beneath her fingers. She could feel the warmth of his skin through his shirt. Her fingers curled, grasping the material with a mind of their own. His heart beat quickened beneath her touch.

She stared at his chest, unsure of what she was waiting for.

"Bella," Edward whispered dropping his face closer to hers.

His mouth was right there. His lips were almost against hers. She felt his breath on her skin and he smelled like cinnamon and spice. It was intoxicating.

Her head felt like it was spinning. The closer he got, the dizzier she felt. His hands were on her face, gently cupping it and lifting it up to meet his.

"Bella" he whispered again.

The fog she was in broke with the sound of his voice. His lips brushed hers just as she pushed him away. He had to grab the railing to keep from falling backwards.

"What the- Bella?" he cried, surprised.

"You have to go," Bella mumbled covering her mouth with her fingers.

"What? Bella, c'mon," he said half rolling his eyes, "I didn't do anything you didn't want me to do." He looked at her and sighed. "Fine. I'm sorry, okay?"

"No, not okay. I want you to leave," she demanded. "Now."

"Bella, you're over reacting."

"I don't care."

_Why was he still here?_

"Think about Alice." He grinned. "Do you really want to ruin her night?"

_Screw Alice!_

"I want you to go, Edward."

He was about to protest when headlights washed over them. Bella's stomach flipped when she saw the sleek black car.

"Edward, Bella," Carlisle said stopping a few feet away from them. "Everything okay?"

"Fine," Bella said quickly. "Edward was just leaving."

"I thought you were going to be here longer," Carlisle said. "I hope you're not leaving because of me, Edward."

"Not this time." Edward looked at Bella. "Apparently, I've overstepped some boundaries and Bella has asked me to leave."

_Oh God, please no! _The last person she needed to explain this to was Carlisle.

Carlisle looked up at Bella, concerned.

"I'm fine," she answered his unspoken question. "I'm just tired. I have no problem with Edward being here if you want him to stay," she added.

"No, I should go," Edward said before Carlisle could extend the invitation. "Big day tomorrow, right?"

"You're welcome to stay," Carlisle said anyway.

"No. Jasper probably needs rescuing by now."

Bella couldn't help it and giggled. Edward smiled at her.

"I'm sorry again, Bella," he said. He spared Carlisle a quick glance and a nod before taking off.

As soon as he was gone Carlisle turned to Bella.

"What happened?" he asked. "Why are you upset?"

Bella shook her head. "It's nothing. I just couldn't take anymore of his attitude," she lied.

"His attitude?"

"You mean you haven't noticed?"

Carlisle chuckled. Bella smiled, relieved he didn't seem to suspect anything more.

She turned to go inside the house and heard him follow close behind. Silence greeted them as Bella felt along the wall for the light switch. Before she could locate it, Carlisle's hands gripped her hips, pulling her against him.

Her bottom pressed against his arousal. He nuzzled the back of her neck, sweeping her hair to the side to expose more of her skin. Her body responded immediately to his touch. Her nipples were painfully erect. Her skin had broken out in goose bumps and with each touch of his lips her body ached for more of his touch.

"I want to make love to you in your bed, Isabella," he murmured into her ear.

She shivered, not just from the feel of his breath on his ear, but from his words. His hands dropped to her thighs and he dragged his palms up. Thanks to his earlier disposal of her panties his fingers brushed her wet flesh.

She spread her legs granting him better access. He pulled his hands away and she groaned.

"Upstairs," he ordered.

"I thought you were worried about being shot," she teased.

Carlisle chuckled. "Charlie's camping out at the Black's tonight. No seeing the bride tradition, you know."

Bella turned around and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Convenient." She smiled.

"Very," Carlisle agreed.

"But what about Esme?"

"She's with relatives right now."

He crushed his mouth to hers before she could say another word and lifted her up at the same time. Bella wrapped her legs around his waist. His cock pulsed behind his pants, pressing into her center.

Bella wiggled against him and moaned.

"I want you in a bed, Isabella. Your bed." He squeezed her ass and thrust against her.

"You should put me down then. I wouldn't want you falling on those stairs and breaking anything important." She gave another little wiggle.

Carlisle laughed and slowly lowered her down his body. Bella grabbed his hand and led the way to the stairs. They'd barely made it to the top landing when Carlisle's hands were back on her.

He turned her to face him, kissing her as he backed her into her room, unzipping her dress as he did.

"I don't know what it is about you, Isabella," he spoke into her neck, kissing his way down to her collarbone, "but you make me feel like a sex crazed teenager. I could spend all day in bed with you and never get tired."

"To hell with the wedding tomorrow let's do that!" Bella laughed.

She felt his cheek curve into a smile against her skin.

"Very tempting," he murmured.

Bella stripped him of his shirt as his mouth found her breasts. Her dress slipped off her arms, falling to her waist.

Carlisle moaned and sucked a nipple into his mouth. His teeth pulled and nipped at the hard bud while he rolled her left one between his fingers.

Bella moaned. She squeezed her thighs together, trying to create some pressure to relieve the empty feeling.

He gently pushed her backwards until the back of her knees hit the bed. He took his mouth away from her skin just long enough to tug her dress down so it pooled at her feet.

He captured her bottom lip between his teeth, softly biting her flesh. Bella moaned again as she fumbled with his zipper, needing him naked as fast as possible.

"Troubles?" Carlisle teased running his hands over her back to her ass.

"That doesn't help," she said.

"What about this?" He cupped his hands over her mound, his middle finger sliding between her drenched folds. "Does this help?"

Bella whimpered and rocked her hips, riding his finger.

"What would help," she panted, "is if your pants were off."

"How is that my fault?" he asked as he plunged his finger into her. "You're the one taking forever to get them off."

"Shut up," she ordered finally yanking the zipper down. "Off. Now."

Carlisle dropped his pants and kicked them off to the side.

Impatient to have him, Bella turned him around and pushed him back on the bed. She straddled his hips, his cock throbbed against her. She grasped the base of his shaft and twisted her hand as she stroked him. A small bead of moisture appeared and Bella spread it around the head of his cock with her thumb.

Carlisle moaned and Bella locked eyes with him.

"Ride me, Isabella," he said his voice thick.

He quickly grabbed the condom he'd tossed on the dresser and put it on faster than she could blink. He grabbed her hips, positioning her over his cock. She held his straining length in her hand as he slowly lowered her onto him.

Bella pulled his hands away as soon as she felt him inside her. She placed them on her breasts, pressing into his palms.

Carlisle groaned as Bella rocked her hips back and forth in slow agonizing movements.

"Faster Isabella," Carlisle moaned.

Bella ignored him. He dropped his hands to her hips trying to increase her pace.

"None of that, Dr. Cullen," she scolded and stopped moving.

"Isa-"

"Don't doctors recommend kegal exercises?"

"What?" He looked at her like she had lost her mind. "I can't think of what- Jesus Christ!" he gasped.

Bella smiled and squeezed her muscles around his shaft again, this time sliding up as she did it.

"Holy…fuck…." Carlisle panted thrusting his hips.

Bella cried out and had to brace her hands on his chest from the force of his thrust.

"I said," Carlisle growled grabbing her hips, "ride me, Isabella!"

Bella stomach flipped with excitement at the demand. With his hands firmly on her body this time, Bella rode just the head of his cock. She rotated her hips, never fucking more than just the first couple of inches of his hard length.

"Isabella," he hissed.

"I'm…ahhh…doing as you…told me…. Oh! Yes!"

Bella leaned forward and rocked her hips again. The part of his cock that wasn't inside her rubbed against her clit. Her muscles clamped around him on their own this time. Bella slid back slowly once more, hitting her clit exactly the way she needed. Her body shuddered as she came, calling out Carlisle's name.

"Enough!" he cried before her orgasm ended and slammed her quivery body onto his.

The feel of his cock ramming all the way inside her caused Bella to come again.

"Oh fuck!"

"Yes!" Carlisle grunted, lifting her and thrusting into her again.

Bella straightened up and rode his cock, harder and faster. Carlisle reached up and pulled her nipples.

"Yes! Mmmm, oh yes!"

"Now, Isabella," Carlisle said. "Come again for me now."

"Carlisle… I…."

He moved his hand between their bodies and flicked her clit.

"Ohmygod!"

"Come. Now!" he groaned.

When she felt his cock shudder with his own release, it was enough for Bella's over sensitive body to come again.

"Oh!" She collapsed on top of him, out of breath.

Carlisle wrapped his arm around her, turning both their bodies so they lay side by side. Bella snuggled up next to him, pressing her nose into the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent. She'd never really paid attention to his smell before, but it was so familiar.

What was it?

She inhaled again, only to stop abruptly half way through the breath.

Cinnamon and… spice.

She immediately pulled away.

"What's wrong?" Carlisle asked surprised.

"What are you wearing?"

He looked down at himself and grinned. "Is that a trick question?"

"No." Bella shook her head impatiently. "I mean what cologne do you wear?"

"Oh. I don't wear any." He smiled at her confused expression. "Most hospitals don't like their staff to wear anything that has a scent to it. I just got used to not wearing anything."

"But you smell like…" _Edward._

Bella was pretty sure this was the wrong time to tell him she'd been sniffing his son.

"Like?" Carlisle prompted.

"Like cinnamon and spice. You smell good."

He smiled. "It's my soap."

"I've never noticed it before." _On you, anyway. _

"It's not that easy to smell with clothes on." He shrugged.

_Uh, wrong!_

"Oh."

She curled back up against him, laying her head on his chest this time. But it didn't help. The smell was all around her and all she could focus on. It wasn't a bad smell, in fact he smelled amazing, but he smelled like Edward. And Edward was the last person she wanted to be thinking about right now.

"So, what did you and Edward talk about?" Carlisle asked cautiously.

_Oh God, really?_

"Tanya mostly," she said.

"Tanya?" Surprise raised his voice.

"Yeah. I was curious who she was so I asked." She listened to his breathing for a minute before asking, "Have you met her?"

"Yes, a few times. Nice girl," he added stroking her hair.

"Do you think they'll work things out?"

Bella felt him shrug. "I'm not sure."

_Okay, now change the subject._

"What happens after tomorrow?" Bella asked.

_Well, don't change it to that subject!_

She bit her lip, wishing she could take back the question. What was she thinking? More importantly what was he thinking?

"After tomorrow," he paused continuing to stroke her hair, "its back to reality for me. I start work the day after. I'll probably be fairly busy for awhile."

Was that his way of preparing her for the brush off?

She swallowed, not trusting her voice to say anything.

"What do you want to happen after tomorrow?" he asked softly.

"I want…." Her voice trailed off.

What did she want? Did she want to see him again? Or was it better, smarter to just leave things once they left Forks? Would she be able to treat him like a vacation fling? What about if they saw each other again at a family get together? Would it be less awkward if they didn't continue this?

"Isabella?" he asked.

"Hmm?"

"Do you want to know what I want?"

_Oh God, yes!_

"Sure."

"I want-"

The door flew open and Alice barged in. She stopped dead as soon as she saw them, her mouth hanging open.

"Alice!" Bella screamed grabbing for the covers.

"Oh my God!" Alice cried still gaping at them. "Ew."

"Alice!"

"I don't mean 'ew' as in you two," she explained quickly. "You're both hot. I mean 'ew' I'm not sleeping in those sheets."

"Alice!" Bella cried again. "Can you give us a minute?"

"Oh, right." She looked away.

"Outside!"

"Oh! Right." She smiled and closed the door.

Bella buried her face in her hands, mortified. That's when she felt the bed vibrating. She looked down at Carlisle.

"Are you laughing?"

"It's kind of funny," he laughed. "Alice is funny. It's never a dull moment with her around, is it?"

"Yeah, she's a real comedian," Bella said dryly.

"You're lucky to have her," Carlisle said looking at her. "You know that saying 'family is forever, friends are fading'?" Bella nodded. "That's not always true. If they're true friends they'll never fade. I think Alice is one of those friends."

"I think you're right," Bella said.

"C'mon, you two!" Alice banged on the door. "You better not be going for round two or three or whatever it is!"

"Even if I do want to kill her most days." Bella glared at the door.

Carlisle laughed and sat up reaching for his clothes. Bella snagged a pair of yoga pants and a tank top out of her suitcase and threw them on. She watched Carlisle finish dressing before speaking.

"What were you going to say before Alice came in?"

Carlisle bent down and kissed her, whispering, "later" against her lips.

Bella watched him leave and Alice enter.

"I'm sorry, Bella," Alice said as soon as the door closed. "Okay, not totally since I got a sneak peek at his doctor's equipment and wow, you were not exaggerating!"

"Alice-"

"But I am sorry I just barged in and interrupted."

"It's okay," Bella sighed.

"I am serious though. I'm not sleeping on those sheets."

"There are probably other ones in the linen closet." Bella stood. "I'll go look."

"No, I'll go." Alice said casting a quick look at the bed. "You get rid of those."

Bella rolled her eyes. While Alice was searching for new sheets, Bella stripped the bed. As she threw the old ones in the hamper she caught the scent of cinnamon again. She closed her eyes, inhaling deeply.

"What the hell are you doing?" Alice asked.

"Nothing." She dropped the sheet back into the basket.

"Oookay. Here." Alice threw the new sheets at her.

"So, how was your night?" Bella asked.

Alice's eyes lit up.

"It was great! Did you know Jasper comes from a huge military family?"

"How would I know that?" Bella muttered snapping the sheet in place.

"He's still undecided if that's what he wants to do. I think he's feeling a lot of pressure from his family to follow in everyone's footsteps."

Bella's hands stilled and she cocked her head to the side looking at Alice.

"What?" She couldn't believe what she'd just heard.

"What?" Alice looked up confused.

"You just told me something about a guy that didn't involve the size of his penis or mattress skills. You know something real about this guy."

"So?"

"Alice Brandon you rarely know a guy's last name, sometimes not even his first."

"He likes to talk." Alice shrugged.

"Since when do you listen?"

"Since when do you listen?" Alice mimicked.

"So how's the sex?" Bella asked.

Alice shifted her eyes and suddenly looked uncomfortable.

"That bad?"

"No. We didn't have sexy," Alice confessed.

Bella was sure she could have been knocked over with a feather. Alice looked at her and rolled her eyes.

"Please don't make a big deal out of this."

"Wasn't that the entire reason you begged me to spend time with Edward? And why did he beg Edward to get lost if he didn't plan to do anything?"

"Hang on," Alice stopped her. "Jasper never asked Edward to take off. It was Edward who wanted him to ask me to hang out alone so Edward could spend time alone with you."

"What?" Alice must have been smoking something earlier and gotten her information wrong.

"Mmm hmm," Alice hummed smugly.

"Why would he do that?"

"Why do you think? That boy wants something while being at this wedding and it ain't to make up with daddy."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Bella muttered trying to deny what Alice said, but the feeling of Edwards lips against hers came rushing back to her.

"So he didn't try and make a move tonight?" Alice asked.

"That doesn't mean anything! He's a cocky SOB who thinks everyone wants him."

"Do _you _want him?"

"No! How can you even ask that?"

"Bella, you're not married to Carlisle, hell you're not even dating the guy. It isn't wrong if you want another man."

"What I feel for Carlisle makes it wrong," Bella said.

Alice narrowed her eyes at her. "How do you really feel about him, Bella?"

"We're not talking about me. I was talking about you and Jasper."

"There is no me and Jasper." Alice turned her back to her. "I'm not foolish enough to confuse lust with anything else."

"You know about his family," Bella fired back at Alice to get her back on track about Jasper. "You think he feels pressured by them, and it was a great night even though you didn't have sex."

"So what?" Alice avoided her eyes as she finished making the bed.

"When was the last time you spent time with a guy and didn't have sex?"

"Does it matter?"

"Maybe. Do you think it matters?" Bella asked.

"No."

_Liar!_

"Do you think it matters junior wants to jump your bones when you're jumping his father's bone?" Alice shot back.

Bella grabbed her toiletry bag and headed for the door. "I'm going for a shower."

"That's what I thought!" Alice cried after her taking Bella's avoidance of the question as an answer.

Bella made sure to putter around in the bathroom longer than necessary to give Alice some time to think. By the time she got back to the bedroom Alice was in bed. She crawled in beside her and turned off the lamp.

"How is it possible that you're the one having the amazing sex and I'm the one _talking_?" Alice asked struggling with the last word.

Bella knew Alice well enough to know this was her attempt at an apology without actually having to say the words.

"Is it that bad?" Bella asked.

"No," Alice admitted. "Jasper is interesting."

"Oh, Alice!" Bella giggled.

"Don't 'oh, Alice' me. We didn't just talk."

"Of course not." Bella smiled.

"Shut up."

She laughed again but kept quiet.

"So Edward made a move, huh? How was it?"

"I thought you told me to shut up?" Bella said avoiding the question.

"That good?"

"Nothing happened with Edward."

"You're a horrible liar, Bella. Did you kiss him?" she pressed.

"No." Bella gritted her teeth, knowing the next question before Alice even asked it.

"Did _he _kiss you?"

"Almost," she admitted quietly.

Bella was almost asleep when Alice whispered her name.

"Hmm?"

"What the hell are we going to do?"

Bella sighed, "I have no idea."

**Reviews are welcome and always appreciated! **


	11. The Wedding

**_Wow, we finally hit over a 100 reviews! Thanks to everyone who keeps reading and reviewing! _**

**_Thank you to my wonderful beta, Leslie. And a big thanks to Holly for sending more readers my way. You rock!_**

**_As always SM owns everything Twilight. _**

"Esme, you're beautiful," Bella said smoothing down the back of her dress.

"Stunning," Alice agreed.

Esme looked at her reflection in the mirror inhaling a shaky breath. Her hair was pulled back in a funky kind of bun that also had a little bit of a ponytail through it. Bella had no idea how Alice had done it, but it looked amazing.

"Are you okay?" Bella asked.

"I think so."

"You're not going to pass out are you?" Alice cast a worried look at the dress.

"No," Esme laughed. She looked at Bella. "I like what Alice did to your hair."

Alice had gotten Bella up at the crack of dawn. She'd fussed with her hair and makeup for hours before finally deciding what to do to best match what she had planned for Esme.

Bella felt like her roots were on fire from being brushed and pulled on so much. In the end, half of her hair had stayed down and the top half Alice had swept back in a loose bun. A few wisps of hair had already escaped and lay around her face.

"I'm glad you like it." Bella smiled.

"We should fix the loose strands though," Alice said eyeing Bella.

"Don't even think about it," Bella warned backing up. "I've been tortured enough."

Esme laughed. Alice pouted.

"What time is it?" Esme asked suddenly looking frantic.

"Almost time to go," Alice answered still looking at Bella's hair.

"Don't forget my veil!"

Bella went to grab it off the dresser.

"Looks like the weather might hold up," she commented looking out the window.

"I hope so."

Bella stepped closer to the window looking down at the yard.

"Esme?"

"Yes?"

"Did you rent a limo?"

Esme looked at her through the mirror.

"A limo? No."

"There's one in the driveway."

Alice peeked over her shoulder.

"Maybe it's a surprise from Charlie," she suggested.

There was a knock on the door and Esme called for them to come in.

"No!" Alice cried rushing for the door. "What if it's Charlie?"

"It's only me," Carlisle's muffled voice came from the other side.

"Oh, well, in that case come in."

Carlisle opened the door and his eyes immediately fell on Esme.

"Es, wow."

"I know, right?" Alice beamed.

"You look amazing," he told her.

"Thanks." Esme smiled.

"Can I give the bride to be a hug?"

"Yes." Esme stepped closer to him.

"No!" Alice cried again.

Everyone looked at her.

"Fine. Just don't wrinkle the dress," she mumbled.

Carlisle shook his head, but smiled as he embraced his sister. His attention shifted to Bella and his eyes roamed over her. His smile widened and he winked at her before pulling away from Esme.

"I have to take Charlie to the hall. He just dropped off his cruiser," he said looking at Esme again. "It's going to be okay."

Esme nodded.

He glanced at Bella once more, sent a quick smile Alice's way and turned to leave.

"Oh," he said turning back to them, "enjoy the limo."

"You did that?" Esme asked.

"Just my small contribution." He smiled and left.

"Okay!" Alice said as soon as the door closed. "Let's go enjoy that limo!"

Esme sucked in another deep breath.

"It _will_ be okay, Esme," Bella assured her coming to stand beside her.

"I know," she said softly. "I'm just nervous."

"Okay, let's go!" Alice bounced with excitement.

She reminded Bella of a yappy little Chihuahua.

"Don't make me spray you," Bella muttered.

Alice stuck her tongue out at her, grabbed Esme's bouquet and opened the door.

"Ready?" Bella asked.

Esme nodded. "Ready."

They just reached the front door when the rain started.

"Shit," Alice spoke for all of them.

"Grab the umbrellas," Bella told her.

"Here." She thrust one at Bella. "You hold your dress up, Esme," she instructed. "I don't care if you flash that driver, don't let your dress touch the ground."

"Yes, ma'am," Esme laughed hiking up her dress.

"We're going to have to make a mad dash for the car."

That didn't sound good.

"Um, Alice? I'm in heels," Bella reminded her.

"We're all in heels." Alice rolled her eyes.

"No, _I'm_ in heels," Bella repeated.

"Oh. Right." Alice bit her lip looking from her to Esme. "Okay, no mad dash. Just take it easy, but go as quickly as you can without falling." She looked directly at Bella.

Bella swallowed back the comment that wanted to burst out of her. She needed to focus on getting to the car without slipping.

And let's face it. Those chances weren't so great.

Bella looked at Esme with her dress practically around her waist and tried not to giggle.

"Okay, let's go." Alice said giving her a worried look.

They hurried out the door and got to the car with only a few rain drops landing on them. The hard part was getting Esme in the car without getting her or themselves wet.

"Get in, Bella," Alice instructed as soon as Esme was safely inside. "Let's not test our luck and keep you out any longer."

"Shut up, Alice," Bella told her getting into the limo.

Alice got in right behind her and slammed the door. The car started to back out of the driveway as soon as Alice was in.

The ride over was quiet. Bella thought she should say something, but wasn't sure what it should be. Before she could think of it they were at the hall.

"It's still a light drizzle," Alice said. "Just be careful going inside and you'll be fine."

"Right."

Alice opened the door and was about to get out when she stopped and said something about heroes.

Bella looked out the tinted window and saw Edward and Jasper coming down the front stairs with the two largest umbrellas she had ever seen.

"Did they steal them from someone's patio set?" Bella wondered out loud.

"Come on, Esme," Alice said stepping out of the limo. "You can lower the dress a little, Jasper has you covered."

Esme laughed and carefully got out of the car.

Bella followed right after, not noticing until she was out of the car that she had been left alone with Edward.

"I have an umbrella, thank you," Bella said before he could offer.

"Yeah, but mines bigger." He grinned.

"It's too big."

"I've never had any complaints."

_Oh my God._

Bella ignored him and quickly tried to climb the stairs only to loose her footing.

"Whoa!" Edward caught her and helped her steady herself. "Careful. You don't want to ruin your pretty dress."

_Another save by another Cullen._

"Thank you," Bella huffed trying to pull away. Only he held on and escorted her the rest of the way up the stairs and into the hall.

"Thank you," Bella said again this time pulling out of his grasp.

"Bella, I'm sorry."

"For helping me up the stairs?" She didn't look at him; instead she pretended to fuss with the hem of her dress.

"For kissing you last night."

Her head snapped up.

"There was no kiss," she whispered.

"Okay, for almost kissing you last night." He smiled.

"You're not sorry at all."

"No, but I thought it was what you would want to hear."

"Let's get one thing straight-"

"I am sorry I made you uncomfortable though." Bella closed her mouth and blinked at him. "We were getting along and I ruined it and for that, I'm sorry."

"Okay."

"If you want to talk about it-"

"I don't," Bella said quickly.

"What if I want to?" he asked moving closer to her.

"Stop. You're doing it again."

"What?"

"Making me uncomfortable."

"Oh." He didn't move away. "Maybe I can't help it."

"Try." She glared.

"Or maybe it's not me at all." He looked her up and down. "Maybe it's you."

"Me?" _Was he serious?_

"Do you have a problem dealing with your sexual desires?"

Her jaw could have hit the floor.

"You arrogant-"

"Bella!" Alice came around the corner. She raised her eyebrows at the two of them. "You need to be with Esme now."

"I'm coming," Bella called looking back at Edward. "Don't mention last night to me, or anyone, again," she said before walking away.

She hurried past Alice mumbling "don't ask" as she walked by her in search of Esme.

"Last door on the right," Alice told her.

Bella waved her thanks and entered the room.

"There you are!" Esme sighed with relief.

"I'm sorry. Do you need anything?"

"I want to thank you, Bella."

"Esme, I told you I'm honored you asked me to be your bridesmaid. You don't have to thank me."

"No, not for that. Well, for that too, but…." She looked at Bella and smiled, unshed tears making her eyes shine. "I want to thank you for making my brother happy."

_Um, what?_

"When I found out about the two of you I had my doubts and I was worried. But this past week…. Bella, I've never seen him so happy," Esme said grabbing Bella's hands. "Not even when he was with Kate. You've made him feel alive again. He hasn't been living for so long. You did that," Esme insisted with tears rolling down her cheeks.

"For the longest time I feared he'd never let himself open up and care for someone again," she continued. "I've never been so happy to be wrong," she laughed. "So, thank you for giving him that. Thank you for giving him a second chance at love."

"Esme, I didn't-What?" Bella's eyes widened at that last part.

_Love? Had she just said love?_

"No." Bella shook her head. "He doesn't…we're not…I don't…." Bella stammered.

Esme smiled and nodded her head knowingly.

"Whatever it is, and as confusing as it all makes this family," she laughed again, "I'm so proud to have you as my stepdaughter."

Bella's throat closed and tears burned her eyes as Esme pulled her into a hug.

_Now would be the time to say something._

The door opened and Edward entered.

Esme wiped her tears away and beamed at her nephew. "You've decided to give me away?"

"I'd be happy to." He returned her smile, looking from her to Bella.

Bella heard the piano start playing and looked at Esme. Wasn't she supposed to be doing something right now?

_Love? Did Carlisle love her? Had he told Esme that?_

"Bella?" Esme said. "I think it's time."

"What?"

"It's time." She tilted her head towards the door.

"Oh." She looked at Edward just noticing he was here. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm walking Esme down the aisle," he said slowly looking at her like she'd lost her mind.

"Oh."

"Bella, are you alright?" he asked.

"She's fine," Esme assured him. "Just a little nervous."

"I'm fine." Bella nodded. She picked her flowers up from the small table. "I'm fine. It's fine. He's fine. Everything is fine," she chanted.

"You don't sound fine. Did she forget her meds or something?" Edward asked.

"Never mind, Edward," Esme said taking his arm. "Go, Bella!"

Bella nodded and walked out of the room. She slowly marched down the aisle to the music, continuing with her chant. She looked at her dad and smiled. He was so handsome in his tux. He looked so nervous all she wanted to do was give him a big hug. Instead, all she could do was smile at him and avoid looking at the man standing next to him.

Bella stood in her spot facing the entrance waiting for Esme. When she entered the room on Edward's arm, Bella had to hold back tears. She really was breathtaking and when she took her place next to Charlie she saw the love between them like never before.

_Love._

"_Thank you for giving him a second chance at love."_

Bella's chest tightened and she felt faint. She peeked at Carlisle and saw him softly smiling at her.

_Don't look at him, don't look at him, don't look at him._

She quickly scanned the crowed, her eyes falling on Edward.

_Don't look at him either! Stare straight ahead and smile._

Bella concentrated on looking only at the couple as she listened to Charlie and Esme exchange vows.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride."

The attendance wasn't very large, but the cheers and clapping that erupted around them made it seem like the hall was packed wall to wall.

Bella handed Esme back her bouquet so she could walk back down the aisle with Charlie as her husband.

The brush of Carlisle's hand against her arm made her jump. She had forgotten she was supposed to walk back down with him. He held out his arm waiting for her to take it.

She looked at it like it might bite.

This was stupid. It was Esme's wedding day. Of course she saw love everywhere she looked. She was looking at the world through rose co loured glasses right now.

That was the expression, right?

She was misinterpreting their entire situation because she was in love.

That had to be it.

Taking a deep breath, Bella looped her arm through Carlisle's.

Why didn't that make her feel any better to believe though? Why did this feel so right?

Okay, being this close to Carlisle in public was a little weird considering they'd tried not to be seen together in public all week. But being able to have him hold her like this and not cause any suspicion was nice. More than nice. And they were just walking together!

Maybe weddings weren't so bad after all.

"Are you giving a toast?" Carlisle whispered to her when they were almost to the end of the aisle.

Bella stumbled. Carlisle held her up.

"I have to give a speech?" Bella almost screeched, her cheeks burning.

"I guess you don't have to." Carlisle smiled down at her. "It's just customary for the maid of honour and best man to say a few words."

"No one told me that," Bella muttered.

Carlisle chuckled. "Then maybe they don't expect you to."

"Are you?"

"Yes."

Great. Now she pretty much had to, too.

Weddings _were_ horrible.

"I like being able to be with you like this," Carlisle whispered into her ear. "No hiding. No lying. Just us being normal."

Bella's heart fluttered.

Okay, maybe not too horrible.

"I like it, too," Bella told him.

"Isabella, I need-"

"You two!" A man in a suit called to them. "We need you for pictures."

What the hell was with people and their rotten timing lately?

"Now," He demanded.

"We're coming!" Bella snapped back.

The photographer looked shocked, but didn't say anything else. Carlisle laughed as he led her outside for pictures.

"Remind me not to piss you off."

The rain had stopped for the moment. Hopefully long enough for the photos to be taken.

Charlie and Esme had decided to have the pictures taken at the little park that was located behind the hall. After nearly an hour of photos, Bella was all smiled out and she wanted to strangle the evil photographer when he stopped them from heading back to the hall.

"What about the bridesmaid and best man?" he asked eyeing Bella carefully. "We didn't get any pictures of them."

"You need pictures of them!" Alice gushed.

"I agree," Esme said.

"Well, come on you two," Charlie said pushing Bella towards Carlisle. "We have a reception to get to."

_What. The. Hell._

_Charlie was encouraging them together? Was he sick?_

"Closer, please," the photographer said looking at them through his camera.

"Put your arm around her waist," Charlie suggested.

Bella stared at him, shocked and speechless. Carlisle looked like he was trying not to laugh.

Maybe _she _was sick. Maybe she was dreaming. That was the only explanation.

"Bella, you looked scared," Edward snickered.

"Yes, smile please."

Bella smiled as the camera flashed a few times. She looked up at Carlisle quickly and saw another flash go off.

"Okay, I think that's it."

Carlisle's arm dropped from her waist.

"Pinch me," Bella whispered to him.

"Excuse me?" he asked, surprised.

"Pinch me!"

"I'm not going to pinch you!" Now he looked appalled.

"Alice!" _Alice would do it!_ "Pinch me."

Alice reached over and pinched her upper arm.

"Ow!" Bella cried.

"You told me to!" Alice said.

"What the hell are you doing?" Carlisle asked bewildered.

"Nothing," Bella said as they walked back to the hall. "Is it my imagination or is my dad acting a little different."

"Yeah, that was weird," Alice said.

"You drove over with him this morning, Carlisle," Bella said to him. "What was he like then?'

"Oh, same as usual I suppose. Must be the wedding atmosphere." Carlisle shifted his eyes away.

"There seems to be a lot of that going around today," Bella muttered taking her seat at the head table.

"What do you mean?" Carlisle asked, pausing to look at her with a concerned expression.

"Nothing." She smiled at him. "Forget it." He looked like he wanted to ask her more about her comment, but thankfully he let it drop.

Originally, the head table was only supposed to have Esme, Charlie, Carlisle and herself. But Esme had insisted they make room for Edward, Alice and Jasper. Bella was seated next to Esme with Alice and Jasper to her right. Carlisle was next to Charlie with Edward to his left. Both looked a little uncomfortable.

Everyone sat for dinner and after Esme and Charlie cut the cake and dessert was being served, Carlisle tapped his champagne glass and stood.

"I'd like to make a toast," he announced waiting for everyone to stop talking. "The first time I heard the name Charlie Swan was about three months after Esme moved to Forks. There was something about the way she said his name that I just knew they'd end up here some day. Or," he paused grinning at the couple, "he'd end up arresting her for stalking."

Bella laughed along with everyone else.

"I'm really glad it didn't come down to the later because Esme really wouldn't do too well caged up. I mean, being her brother I've seen her in the morning and it's not pretty." He smiled at Esme while the guests chuckled. Charlie whispered in Esme's ear and kissed her on her temple while she blushed. "But in all seriousness, I'm glad that Charlie came into her life. Not only because he makes her happy, but also, because of their union, I've had the opportunity to meet some pretty amazing people." With a fleeting look at Bella he raised his glass. "To Esme and Charlie."

Bella felt like she was going to throw up as she raised her glass along with everyone else. What was she supposed to say? She hated public speaking. She wasn't even sure her legs would hold her up when she stood.

Before she had a chance to tap her glass someone was doing it for her. She looked down the table and saw Edward grinning up at her.

"Thanks." _Asshole_. Her voice sounded hoarse. She cleared her throat and started, "I have nothing prepared. I didn't even know I was going to give a toast until I was asked about it two hours ago, but how do you say no when it's your father's wedding." She took a deep breath. "My dad had never introduced me to anyone he'd dated, so when he told me he wanted me to meet someone, I knew it had to be serious. He said she was funny and smart and an amazing person, and I have to agree with him. Meeting Esme and seeing how happy she has made my father has been amazing.

"I'm not very good with this kind of thing," Bella said looking at her parents, "but…. Earlier today Esme thanked me for being here this week, however, I think I should be the one thanking her. My father deserves only the best and you, Esme, are absolutely the best." Bella looked only at Esme. "Thank you for giving him a second chance at love." Bella raised her glass and faced the crowd. "To love!"

Bella sat down and was immediately embraced by Esme.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." Esme let go of her when she heard another tinkling of glass.

"There's one more thing before this party gets into full swing," Edward suddenly announced standing. "I have a gift for my aunt and her new husband."

Esme looked at Edward then Carlisle, who shook his head. He was obviously out of the loop.

"If it's alright, I would like to be the one to introduce the first dance with a piece I wrote just for them."

"Oh my gosh, Edward!" Esme gasped. "I would love that."

Charlie stood, took Esme's hand and led her out to the middle of the dance floor. He looked very nervous, which Bella could understand as she shared her fathers dislike for being the center of attention. But he wrapped his arms around Esme and kissed her sweetly keeping his eyes only on her. Edward took a seat at the piano and started to play.

Bella sat there captivated from the very first note. She'd expected him to be great. He was in Julliard after all, but the music, his music, was astonishing. It was soft and slow and yet it pounded through her body.

It spoke volumes about everything he felt and thought. She realized he must release his inner most secrets and feelings to produce music like this. Music that made you want to laugh and cry at the same time. Music that touched your heart. Music that made you forget the sorrow you felt and only concentrate on the moment that was happening around you.

Like the moment right in front of her now.

As Bella watched her father spin his new bride around the dance floor, she saw for the first time what real happiness looked like. The look on their faces, the feelings they must have right now, was something everyone should have a chance to experience.

She looked over at Carlisle and caught him watching her. Her chest swelled and she wanted to cry. He was leaving tomorrow. This was their last night together and she had been avoiding him because of some crazy thing Esme said.

It was crazy after all. No one could fall in love with someone in a week. Especially when they didn't even know a single thing about each other.

What was his favorite food? Color? What did he do to unwind after a hard day at work? Why did he decide to become a doctor?

Those were important things to know, weren't they?

The music ended and the room exploded in applause. Everyone went to praise him and congratulate Esme and Charlie. The DJ started other music and people paired off on the dance floor.

Edward escaped the group of people that had gathered around him and came to sit next to her.

"That was beautiful," she told him when he sat down.

"You really think so?" he asked.

"Would I say something nice to you if I didn't mean it?"

"True." He smiled at her. "How about a dance?"

"Oh, um…" She looked around the room at the other couples on the dance floor. She noticed Carlisle was chatting with an elderly couple. "I'm really not a very good dancer."

"That's okay." He stood and held out his hand to her. "I'm great at it so all you have to do is follow my lead and you'll be fine. I won't bite. Unless you want me to," he added with a wink.

"Don't count on it," she replied dryly as she rolled her eyes.

"Just the dance for now then."

Bella hesitated for a moment more before shrugging.

"Don't say I didn't warn you," she cautioned.

He laughed and tugged her along with him. She cast one more glance behind her at Carlisle. He was still talking to the couple, but his eyes were on her.

"Now, just do as I do," Edward said.

"That could be dangerous," Bella muttered looking down at their feet.

Edward laughed and tipped her chin up so her eyes met his.

"Don't look down."

"Then how do I-"

"You'll know."

Bella sighed and gave up.

_Just one dance._

Edward danced almost as well as he played piano. She had to admit she was impressed.

"I guess dating a ballet dancer has its perks," she commented on his dancing skills.

"Actually, my dad taught me."

Bella's eyes widened in surprise.

"I don't remember why or when," he said before she could ask, "but I do remember him teaching me." He flashed his crooked grin again. "It does impress ballet dancers though."

Bella rolled her eyes again at his arrogant comment.

"So, because we're technically family now how much does that lower my chances of sleeping with you?" he asked.

Bella tripped over her feet.

"What?!" she exclaimed shocked that he'd just come out and say that. He asked the question as casually as he'd ask about the weather.

"I just want to know the odds I'm up against."

"When Hell freezes over. How are those odds?" Bella growled.

"Not bad considering the effects global warming seems to be having."

Bella opened and closed her mouth, but no sounds came out. Edward laughed at her.

Why did she put up with this? First the kiss and now this? Why had she even agreed to dance with him when she knew he couldn't be trusted?

"You're impossible," she spat.

"I think you like it," he said softly. "Why else would you continue to be with me?"

"Maybe to be nice?"

"If that's what you need to tell yourself."

Bella stopped moving and pulled her arms away.

"Do you really think you're that irresistible?" she asked, annoyed.

"Prove to me I'm not," he challenged.

"That won't be very hard."

"I bet," he said as his eyes traveled over her body with a cocky smirk, "that I will be in your pants or up your skirt before I leave Forks."

Bella's jaw dropped. She had a sudden urge to take her shoe off and stab him with the heel.

"Can I cut in?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes." Bella glared at Edward. "This dance is so over."

"Enjoy your evening, Bella," Edward said pleasantly before walking away.

Bella practically fell into Carlisle's arms.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"How do you put up with him?" she cried.

"It's not always easy." Carlisle smiled. "What did you say?"

Bella shook her head. "Doesn't matter."

"Okay," he said letting it go. "Will you dance with me?"

"Do I have to remind you I'm not very good?"

"You were pretty good that last time we danced together."

Bella blushed at the memory of them at the club.

"I promise to behave this time," he swore.

"Don't promise that," Bella said pressing her body into his.

Carlisle groaned and took a small step back.

"Be good."

Bella stuck out her bottom lip and pouted.

"All I want to do is kiss you when you do that," Carlisle murmured.

Bella suck out her lip further.

Carlisle laughed and pulled her into his arms as the music started again.

"Why did you become a doctor?" Bella asked after a few minutes.

Carlisle looked surprised at the question.

"My father died of cancer when I was a teenager," he said looking thoughtful. "I guess in some way I wanted a chance to end the disease that took him away."

"I'm sorry," Bella said.

"It was a long time ago."

"But you're a surgeon, not a researcher."

"Yes. I do surgeries all the time on people who are fighting to stay alive. If I do my job right, if I do it well, they get another chance at life."

"You're a pretty amazing person, Carlisle Cullen," Bella whispered.

"I'm a doctor." He smiled down at her. "That's every doctor's goal."

"What's your favorite color?" she asked needing to lighten the mood.

"Orange," he laughed.

"Seriously?" Bella smiled.

"It's a bright happy color." He shrugged. "Plus it reminds me of the fruit."

"Hmmm. Favorite food?"

"Anything Mexican."

"Sexual position?" She grinned.

He laughed. "What's with the questions?"

"I don't feel like we really know anything about each other," she said. "I just wanted to know."

"Isabella, you know more about me than people I've known for years."

"I don't know the minor things. I want to know the things that make you who you are."

Carlisle remained silent. Maybe she was pushing too far. Bella was about to change the subject when he spoke.

"I read the newspaper every morning, starting with the comics. I like to start my day off with something light and I never read the obits because I deal with enough death.

"I dislike peanut butter, love ketchup on my eggs and I have to stir coffee exactly four times counter clockwise or else I feel off."

Bella giggled.

"I think horror movies are a total waste of time," he continued smiling at her. "I love dogs and want to rescue one, but feel bad for all the time it would be left alone. Because I have to be careful with my hands, I don't play sports anymore and I miss it."

"Is that why you jog?" she asked.

"Yes. I've never ridden a horse, but have owned a motorcycle and one of these days I really should learn to cook." He brushed her hair away from her face. "And I don't care what position it is as long as it makes you moan."

Bella's laugh drew stares from the people around them.

"Thank you." She beamed at him.

"Anything to make you smile."

"Well, in that case," she smiled wickedly, "how soon can we sneak out of here?" She brushed against his front suggestively.

"Isabella," he warned.

"Do you think we'd be missed if we disappeared for a few minutes?"

Carlisle looked around the room.

"Disappeared to where?" he asked.

"I dunno…" Bella grinned as a thought came to her. "How do you feel about your car?"

"I like my car?" The answer came out as a question.

Bella laughed at his confusion.

"I mean have you ever explored the possibilities of the backseat?"

Realization brightened his eyes.

"No."

"Do you want to?" she asked playing with his collar.

"More than anything," he breathed. "Meet me at the side door."

Bella practically ran to the side exit. She was just about to sneak out when someone grabbed her arm. She spun around and glared.

"What do you want?"

"Leaving already?" Edward asked.

"I need some air. Alone," she added firmly.

"Alone?" He smirked. "Are you sure?"

"Do you want something?" she asked not in the mood for his games.

"Have you seen my father?" he asked looking at her closely.

"Not since we finished our dance." It wasn't a lie; she hadn't seen him since he told her to meet him here.

"You two looked pretty cozy out there," he commented.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked narrowing her eyes at him.

"He doesn't seem to make you uncomfortable." Edward studied her for a few minutes and then smiled.

"He doesn't force his advances on me."

"So you willing except them?" He smirked. "Sure you don't want some company?"

"Positive," she answered barely above a whisper.

"If you see my father tell him I'm looking for him. Actually," he said, "on second thought, just tell him Jasper and I are crashing at the house tonight and Esme said he's supposed to take their room since they won't be there."

"Fine."

Edward nodded and walked away, looking back once. Bella waited, making sure he was really gone before slipping outside.

"Carlisle?" she whispered into the night. "Carlisle?"

She looked up and down the row of vehicles, finally spotting his black Mercedes off to the side. She slowly walked towards it, checking behind her every few feet.

"Carlisle?"

_Where the hell was he?_

Bella was about to go back to the door when she was grabbed from behind. Her scream was cut off from the hand clamped over her mouth.

"It's just me," Carlisle laughed quietly.

Bella spun around, pulling away from him with her hand clasping her chest.

"You scared me to death!"

"I'm sorry," he apologized. "You weren't at the door."

"No, _you _weren't at the door."

He reached for her, crushing her to his chest.

"Have I told you tonight how beautiful you look?" he asked. Bella wrapped her arms around his neck and shook her head. "Well, you are."

"You look pretty amazing yourself," she said running her hands down his chest. "But I really want to see you out of the tux."

Carlisle walked her backwards until her back was against the car. The coolness chilled her skin through the thin material of her dress. She shivered beneath him.

He wedged his leg between hers making her widen her stance. She parted her lips as he softly kissed her, inviting his tongue to explore her mouth. He did so with an agonizing slowness, teasing her tongue with gentle strokes with his own tongue.

Bella moaned and tried to kiss him harder. He pulled away, moving his mouth over her neck as he nipped her soft flesh.

"Carlisle," Bella moaned.

She cupped him through his pants, his cock hardening even more from her touch. He groaned and thrust into her hand. She stroked him, moulding her hand over the bulge.

"Isabella," he breathed.

"What?"

Instead of his answer she heard the click of doors unlocking. He reached behind her and opened the door.

"Get in," he commanded.

Not needing to be told twice, Bella got into the backseat scooting as far over as possible. Carlisle crawled in behind her, shutting and locking the doors.

Bella straddled his lap as soon as he was seated. Her dress rode up as she did, exposing her thighs to his wandering hands. Carlisle caressed her legs, sliding his hands up and over her ass. He squeezed her cheeks, making her grind into his lap.

As her mouth assaulted his, Bella unbuckled, unsnapped and unzipped his pants. She spread the front open, pulling out his throbbing erection through the front part of his boxer briefs.

Carlisle grunted as Bella wrapped her hand around his length, stroking him.

"Isabella," he groaned.

"Tell me how this feels," she whispered.

She licked her hand, coating it with saliva and then wrapped it back around his cock.

"So fucking good," Carlisle grunted thrusting his hips. "More."

Bella manoeuvred herself between his spread legs. There wasn't very much room on the floor, but it would have to do.

Grasping the base of his shaft she lowered her mouth to his cock. He inhaled sharply as her cool, wet mouth met his hot, soft skin.

"Jesus, Isabella."

She sucked harder, taking more of him in her mouth as she swirled her tongue around him.

"Fuck…ohh….Isabella! Stop. Now."

He pulled her head away and helped her up from the floor, positioning her back over his cock.

"I need you now," he said his voice heavy with arousal.

He pushed her lacy bikini panties out of the way and rammed himself inside her.

"Yes!" Bella hissed as he filled her.

"Move, baby," he whispered. "Milk my cock. Make us come."

"Put your hands on me," she demanded rocking her hips. "Touch me!"

Carlisle unzipped her dress and pulled it down so her breasts were exposed. He wrapped his lips around one nipple, plucking at it with his teeth.

"Ahhh, yes! Ohmygod!" Bella moved her hips faster.

Carlisle pinched her other nipple, tweaking it between his fingers.

"Harder," Bella moaned. "Yes, like that! Just like that!" she panted fucking him faster, harder.

"Isabella, you're going to have to mo-"

"No." Bella shook her head. She kissed him, pulling away only to whisper, "Come inside me."

"Is-"

"Now!" Bella rode him harder. "Oh my God Carlisle come in me now!"

When he grabbed her hips she expected him to lift her off him. Instead he pulled her closer and swore into her neck as he came.

She leaned against him, waiting for their breathing to slow and their heart rates to go back to normal. She loved hearing his heart pound, knowing he was out of breath because of her.

"I want to see you again, Isabella," he breathed into her ear.

Forget going back to normal, Bella's heart stopped.

"I don't want this to be the end of our time together," he told her looking into her eyes.

"I'm only here for another week and you have to go back to work. You said yourself you're going to be pretty busy," she said softly.

"I know." He traced his fingers over her face, outlining her lips. "I can't just walk away tomorrow though."

"Neither can I," she confessed.

Later that night Bella snuck into Charlie and Esme's room where Carlisle was spending his last night.

Alice was fast asleep in their room, while Edward and Jasper crashed in the living room.

She crept to his bed, pulled back the covers and crawled in next to him. He kissed her temple, her bare shoulder and the middle of her back before wrapping his arm around her, snuggling her closer.

He fell asleep with his face buried in her hair.

She laid awake listening to the soft breathing of the man she feared she'd fallen in love with.

**_Weddings make me nauseous, which is why I kinda skimmed over it lol. Leslie definitely helped me out revising the toasts. _**

**_Now go leave me some belated birthday love! _**


	12. Drunk Confessions

**Props out to my amazing beta, Leslie. This story was scratched together in 2 days and her input and changes are greatly appreciate.**

**Thank you to everyone who keeps reading and reviewing. You guys are awesome.**

****SM owns all things Twilight****

The image on the T.V. suddenly disappeared. Bella dragged her eyes up the body in front of her, briefly pausing on the coffee cup being offered to her, before meeting his gaze.

"A piece offering." Edward smiled sheepishly.

"You don't know what that means," Bella said. "And it won't be very peaceful if your ass keeps blocking Gerard Butler."

"Gerard Butler, huh?" He sat a little closer than necessary next to her. "I didn't figure him to be your type. Is it the accent?" he asked sipping the coffee.

"I don't have a type," she muttered watching him. "Now you're drinking my coffee?"

"You didn't want it."

"I didn't say that." She snatched the cup away and took a sip. "Ugh!" She pushed the coffee back at him making a face. "Have you ever heard of sugar?"

"Too strong?"

"Peace offering denied."

"You could always stick your finger in it and sweeten it up a little, sugar." He grinned.

"That's so lame," Bella said rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, it was bad," Edward laughed. "So why are you moping?"

"I'm not moping," Bella grumbled.

"You look like you've lost your best friend."

"No, I'm pretty sure my best friend is around here somewhere doing your best friend."

"If you feel left out we can fix that." He wiggled his eyebrows at her.

"I'd rather drink that awful coffee."

"You're not a morning person, are you?"

Bella ignored him and stared at the T.V.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked softly.

"Talk about what?"

"This burning desire you have for me, but refuse to admit." Bella threw a pillow at him and he laughed. "Okay, we'll talk about that later. We can talk about what's bothering you."

"Nothing is bothering me," Bella snapped.

"Has anyone ever told you you're a terrible liar?"

"Has anyone ever told you you're obnoxious?"

"A few people." He flashed his crooked grin.

"You know that's not a good thing."

"That depends," he said with a shrug.

"On?"

"Whether or not it gets me what I want."

"You're unbelievable," she muttered.

"So I've been told." He nudged her arm with his and laughed. "C'mon, tell me what's wrong."

She missed Carlisle, that's what was wrong. He'd been gone no more than five hours and it felt like forever.

They'd said their goodbyes early that morning before she snuck back to her room. He promised he'd call as soon as he could and he'd do whatever he could for them to see each other again before she left Forks.

She couldn't help but feel it was an empty promise considering how busy he'd be. Even if he really did want to see her again she had to be realistic that it might not be possible because of his schedule.

Neither one of them had said that out loud though. She had quietly watched him pack his things, her chest tightening with each item he threw into his suitcase. When he had finished packing he pulled her off the bed and wrapped his arms around her.

"You have no idea how grateful I am to have met you this week," he'd told her.

_Grateful? _The word had left her feeling confused. He was grateful? What did that mean?

He'd kissed her and said, "I had fun."

_Fun? _He'd had fun and she was pretty sure she was in love with him. Nice. Not exactly what a girl wanted to hear.

"I had fun, too," she told him avoiding his eyes.

"I'll call," he promised again before leaving.

And now here she sat, watching romantic comedies waiting for his call.

_Pathetic much?_

"Hey?" Edward nudged her again. "Tell me."

"It's nothing," Bella said trying to think of something so he'd leave her alone. "Just waiting around for my dad and Esme to get back so I can go home is a little boring."

"You're moping because of Phoenix?"

"I have no reason to be here now. I kind of want to go home." She peeked at him from the corner of her eye to see if he was buying it.

"Yeah, I get that," he said, nodding.

"You do?" she asked, surprised.

"Yeah. I have no reason to stick around and yet here I am."

"Yeah, why are you still here?" she questioned just realizing what he said was true.

"Jasper seems to be having fun." He smirked. "And I have that bet with you, remember?" Bella's mind was blank and she looked at him confused. "You know, that I could get into your pants-"

"You've already lost that bet," she snapped, remembering.

"I haven't left Forks yet."

Bella threw the blanket she had wrapped around her off and stood.

"Is that the real reason you're sticking around?" she asked with her hands on her hips glaring at him. "To see if you can get me into bed?"

"It certainly is a nice thought." He smiled.

"I hope you enjoy it because it's the only thing that will be keeping you company while you're here."

He chuckled as she stalked into the kitchen. "I'm sure I could find someone who's willing." He grinned at her from the couch.

"Then why don't you go bug one of them?"

"Because it's so much more fun to persuade you to like me."

"Good luck with that," she said pouring coffee.

"You know it's almost as if you made up your mind you weren't going to like me before we even met."

Bella stopped scooping sugar.

"Why do you say that?"

"It just seems like there are times when you do like me, but you catch yourself and have to pretend like you don't." He stood and walked towards her. "It's almost like you're afraid to like me. Am I that intimidating?"

"No, you're that much of an arrogant prick."

He stared at her without speaking. After a few minutes she shook her head and look away.

"I'm sorry," she sighed. "That was rude."

"Yeah, it was, but it was honest." He was in front of her holding her face in his hands before she could blink. "Never feel like you have to lie and spare my feelings, Bella. I prefer honesty."

_And yet everyone that loved him was lying to him. How ironic was that?_

"What would you do…how would you feel if you found out someone had been lying to you for a long time?" she asked barley above a whisper. The words were out before she could stop them and she regretted it instantly.

He looked into her eyes, searching for answers to unspoken questions.

"I guess that would depend on what the lie was and why they felt like they had to lie in the first place," he said just as softly.

"If it was meant to be for your own good, to protect your feelings, would you forgive them?"

_Shut up, Bella!_

"Why do you ask?" His eyes narrowed in suspicion.

There was something about his eyes that made her want to tell him everything. This was his life she was helping to hide from him. He had a right to know, didn't he?

"Edward, I…"

His eyes.

Carlisle's eyes.

_Carlisle._

She promised Carlisle.

"You're uncomfortable." He dropped his hands from her face and took a small step away from her.

"No. Yes. I don't know," she groaned covering her face. "I don't know what to do."

He gently pried her hands away from her face.

"About what?"

_This is why you keep your mouth shut, Bella._

"About you." She had to think quickly. "I want to like you Edward, but I can't as long as you keep up this sexual…harassment!"

Edward burst our laughing.

"Sexual harassment?" he finally spat.

"What would you call it?" she asked amused by his outburst.

"Flirting?"

"If this is how you flirt you need a lot of help."

"You're right." He suddenly looked serious. "Help me be a better person, Bella." And then he laughed again.

Bella shook her head and turned to walk away when he grabbed her arm and spun her back to face him.

His mouth was on hers before she had time to react. His lips were hot and hungry, but the kiss was soft and gentle. He slightly parted his lips, encouraging her without words, but with the tip of his tongue to do the same. He wedged his tongue between her closed lips, gently breaking their seal to slide into her mouth.

He grasped her upper arms, holding her in place as their tongues connected. His mouth pressed against hers harder, seeking more than what she was giving.

Bella finally broke the kiss, twisting out of his grip. She stared at him, unsure of what to say or do.

"If I'm going to be accused of sexual harassment I might as well make it worth it," he said smiling.

"That was more like sexual assault," she chocked out.

"Not if you kissed me back."

"I didn't kiss you back."

"You didn't pull away right away." He shrugged. "Same as kissing me back."

"Only in your world."

"Are you mad?" Edward asked looking at her closely.

"No." The fact that she wasn't concerned her more than the kiss. "Don't do it again."

"Sure. Next time you can kiss me," he said sounding confident.

"There won't be a next time."

"If you say so, but when it does happen I reserve the right to say I told you so." He grinned.

Before Bella could comment Alice walked in, her arms loaded with grocery bags.

"We've got steaks, burgers, hotdogs, chips, dip, chocolate and most important we have beer." She dropped the bags on the table and looked from Bella to Edward. "We also seem to have a lot of tension."

"What about the fruit and veggies I asked you to get?" Bella asked ignoring her comment.

"Jasper has those. Really Bella, didn't you hear me say we have chocolate?"

"Chocolate, huh?" Edward peered into a grocery bag. "Didn't you tell me chocolate made you easy, Bella?"

Alice looked up from the grocery bag she was unpacking.

"Excuse me?"

"That's not what I said," Bella quickly defended herself.

"I remember you telling me you were easy." Edward shook his head. "But so far that has turned out to be false."

"Depends who you ask," Alice muttered.

"Alice!" Bella cried.

"What?" Edward grinned looking at Alice. "Do tell."

"It's nothing," Alice said quickly. She turned to Bella and asked, "Why did you tell him you were easy?"

"I didn't!" Bella insisted. "It was a misunderstanding."

"Hmm." Edward reached into a bag and pulled out a huge box of chocolates. "I think I'll keep these just in case."

Bella snatched the box out of his hands and threw it on the table.

"Why don't you go help Jasper with the other bags?"

"Jasper's a big boy, he can handle a few bags," Edward said unpacking the groceries.

"I'll go help him then," Bella said.

"I can go," Alice volunteered.

"No! I need some air anyway," Bella told her already out the door.

Jasper was just slamming the trunk shut when Bella came out.

"Hey, Bella. What's up?" Jasper smiled at her.

"Can I ask you something?" She wrapped her arms around herself.

"Shoot." He set the bags on the trunk and gave her his undivided attention.

"Is Edward always this…?" She paused searching for the right word.

"Egotistical?" Jasper offered.

"Yes!" Bella cried. "That's it exactly!"

Jasper nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Bella, there's a lot you don't know about Edward. He comes off as over confident and arrogant, but it's just a way for him to protect himself I think."

"From what?"

"From everyone." Jasper shrugged. "He has a lot of unresolved issues with Carlisle and until he works on those…. I don't know." He lifted his shoulders again. "I do know that the only person he's ever cut the shit with is Tanya."

"Really?" Bella was surprised.

"He wasn't exactly truthful with her when they first met-"

"I know, he told me he lied to her about his age."

"He told you about that?" Now Jasper was the one who sounded surprised.

"Yeah. He told me about her, too. Well, not really about her, but why they weren't together anymore."

"Oh." Jasper looked at her for a minute before shaking his head. "Well, after they got together he sort of changed, at least with her. He still had an ego, but she calmed him down some. I think he trusts her."

"Sounds like she's good for him then."

"I guess. Really Bella, he's not a bad guy."

"You have to say that because he's your friend." Bella smiled. "Just like I have to say that Alice isn't a tyrant."

Jasper laughed. "I think Alice could be a tyrant though. Just like Edward is capable of being a good guy. Only…" Jasper looked at her like he was concerned.

"Only what?" Bella stepped closer to him.

Jasper dragged his hand through his hair and sighed.

"Edward will sometimes have alternative motives for getting close to people. If he does it never ends well."

"Is that what he's doing now?"

"I doubt it. I mean he has no reason to, right?"

"So his actions are sincere?" Bella questioned.

"Are you interested in Edward?" Jasper asked the surprise back in his voice. "I thought you were already involved with someone."

"No. I mean yes, I am and no, I'm not interested in him. Edwards actions are kind of overwhelming sometimes and I'd like to know where his head is at."

"How long does it take to bring a few bags in, people?" Alice called from the kitchen window.

"We're coming!" Jasper hollered back.

Bella grabbed two bags off the car and followed Jasper to the house.

"Hey, Jasper?"

"Yeah?" He turned to look at her.

"Don't say anything to Edward about this, okay?"

"Sure." He smiled and opened the door.

"Took you long enough," Alice muttered taking the bags from Jasper.

"Just making sure the BBQ worked. You want to grill, right?" Jasper nuzzled her neck and she giggled.

Bella glanced at Edward sitting at the table with the box of chocolates opened in front of him and a shit eating grin on his face.

"Chocolate, Bella?" he asked.

She ignored him and set her bags on the counter.

"So, what did I walk in on?" Alice asked.

"Nothing," Bella said.

"I kissed Bella," Edward said at the same time.

Bella's cheeks burned as she heard Jasper mutter as he passed by, "I think you know where his head is at."

"Did she kiss you back?" Alice asked with her eyebrows raised.

"_She_ is in the room." Bella spun around and glared at them. "And no, I didn't."

"You didn't push me away either," Edward pointed out.

"Fine. You kissed me. I didn't kiss you back, but I didn't push you away right away either. First the inappropriate comments at the wedding, then the crappy piece offering - which you drank by the way! - and now this. Bravo! You've just made yourself look even more like an ass than before."

Alice and Jasper gaped at her like she had just grown a second head. Edward looked amused and asked, "Is that your subtle way of saying you think I'm charming?"

"I think you're a lot of things Edward, but charming definitely isn't one of them!" Bella cried and stomped out of the room muttering loud enough for them to hear. "Egotistical. Self absorbed. Arrogant jackass…."

"Dude, you gotta chill," Jasper warned.

"I'll go talk to her," Alice said giving Edward a menacing glare.

"No, let me go up there," Bella heard Edward say as she hurried upstairs and slammed the bedroom door.

Who the hell did he think he was? Prancing around like he was someone to be worshipped.

Okay, maybe he didn't prance, but he definitely strutted.

And telling everyone about that stupid kiss? Did the idiot not keep anything to himself?

Why had he kissed her in the first place? It wasn't like she was sending off come and get me vibes. She couldn't have been clearer how she felt about him.

_You didn__'__t stop him._

"There wasn't time to stop him," she muttered to herself.

_That__'__s a lame excuse._

"It's not an excuse!"

_You said you weren__'__t mad that he kissed you._

"Well, I am mad!"

"Good to know."

Bella spun around to find Edward leaning against the door frame grinning.

Oh God, had she really just been caught talking to herself? And by him of all people?

"Go away," she snapped.

"That's not very nice."

"You are the last person who should be telling anyone what's nice or not."

He pushed off the frame and sauntered into the room.

"I'm sorry."

Bella rolled her eyes.

"Does that even mean anything when you say it?" she asked.

He smirked. "Sometimes."

"You've said it to me half a dozen times already and so far it's meant shit."

Edward wandered over to her dresser and picked up an old picture of her, Charlie and Renee.

"I don't even think you're mad at me," he said looking at the picture.

"Who else would I be mad at?" she asked trying to resist the urge to rip the frame out of his hands.

"Yourself." He put the picture down and faced her.

Bella huffed. She felt like she was arguing with a tree. "You're right, I'm mad at myself. Now go." Edward dropped onto the bed. "Are you deaf?" Bella asked, annoyed.

"You're mad because you actually liked our kiss," he said ignoring her.

"I would have rather made out with a poisonous snake," Bella said.

"Don't be so over dramatic. Poisonous snake…really? Beside, that's fairly close to what you make me sound like." He grinned mischievously. "Sssssss."

"Get out, Edward," Bella sighed.

He laid back on her bed and put his hands behind his head, crossing his legs at the ankles. "We're going to be stuck with each other for the next few days, Bella. You're going to have to deal with your attraction to me at some point."

"And you're going to have to deal with your issues," she snapped.

His smile wilted a little.

"What do you mean?"

"You're so messed up with whatever daddy issues you have that you use sarcasm and rudeness as defenses to keep people at arms length. You don't deal with the real feelings you have so you put on this tough guy act when really you're still the same hurt little boy who feels abandoned and wants attention."

Edward started at her. His eyes lost their teasing glint and turned cold.

"Are you pissed I'm keeping you at arms length, Bella?" He sneered. "You're the one sending mixed signals. You want me to let you in? Stop being a cock tease."

"I'm not giving you mixed signals," Bella disagreed softly. "I'm not giving you any kind of signals. I don't want anything from you, Edward."

"Keep telling yourself that. Maybe you'll start to believe it and the sexual tension will disappear and you won't have to worry about being unfaithful to that nonexistent boyfriend of yours."

"Oh my God!" Bella cried balling her hands into fists out of frustration. "You are the most self absorbed person ever. Are you trying to make everyone hate you?"

"Don't you already hate me?"

"It would be easy to hate you." She looked at him. "You're so bitter and angry and your actions are almost always inappropriate, but I can't hate you."

"Why?" Edward narrowed his eyes.

"Because it's not your fault you're like this."

"Don't start any of that psycho babble bullshit on me, Bella." He stood and glared down at her. "You don't know anything."

"And you think you do with all your fantasies and false accusations about me wanting you?" Bella crossed her arms.

"They're only fantasies if they don't come true." He smirked.

"They'll never come true."

Jasper's words suddenly came back to her.

_"Edward will sometimes have alternative motives for getting close to people. If he does it never ends well."_

A chill ran down her spine as she asked, "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?" He looked confused.

"Trying so hard to…." She waved her hand back and forth between them.

"Fuck you?" he asked, amused.

"Yes." She glared at him. "What's in it for you?"

"Have you ever had sex, Bella? Because I'm sure that answer is fairly obvious," he said.

"I mean," she said clenching her teeth together, "why do you want it to happen so badly?"

"I'm horny and Jasper took the only other available female in the house." He grinned.

"If that's the only reason go find another female."

"What? Do you want me to declare my undying love and devotion to you or something?" Edward looked appalled.

"No!"

"Then what does 'if that's the only reason mean'?"

"Maybe there's another reason you want to hook up so bad. Do you have an agenda or something?"

Edward looked away and shook his head.

"You're over thinking this, Bella."

"Am I?" Bella stared at him until he looked at her again.

He scoffed and walked to the door. Just before leaving he turned to her and said, "You're a challenge, Bella. I like a challenge. I like winning. This is nothing but a competition and that's it. That's all you are."

The words left Bella feeling cold as she watched him leave.

_A competition?  
_  
As far as he knew she had a boyfriend, so he felt like he was competing against a guy he didn't know?

That was messed up.

_Unless he did know__…_

No, that was impossible. He couldn't know about her and Carlisle. If he knew something he would have exposed them already.  
_  
Wouldn__'__t he?_

What if he did know? Would it even matter?

Esme knew. Charlie was obviously in the loop. Edward's behavior at the wedding still puzzled her.

Who were they hiding from anymore? Edward? Would Carlisle even care if he found out? Did it even matter anymore?

The muffled ringing of her cell phone interrupted her thoughts. Bella quickly fished the phone out of her pocket and smiled at the number displayed.

"Hey!"

"Hi," Carlisle said. "Are you busy?"

"No, but I thought you would be. I didn't expect you to call so soon."

"Is that a complaint?" he teased.

"No," Bella laughed. "A pleasant surprise."

"Well, I don't officially start until tomorrow so I figured I'd get things set up for my belongings to be moved out here."

"You don't have to go back to L.A.?"

"I was renting a condo there and the landlord said he'd make sure the movers get in okay."

"Isn't packing involved when moving?" Bella asked curling up on the bed.

Carlisle laughed. "I did it all before I left."

"Hmm…so when do you get to move into the house?"

"Probably by the end of the month."

"Hey Bella, do you want to come with us- Oops," Alice said walking into the room. "Sorry, didn't realize you were on the phone. We're going to a movie."

"Okay."

"Did you want to come?"

"Think I'll pass."

"Right. Okay, have fun." Alice winked and shut the door.

"Sorry," Bella apologized to Carlisle.

"If you want to go I can call you later," he offered.

"No, I'm good here."

Awkward silence followed as Bella wondered what to talk about.

"Is it corny to say I miss you?" Carlisle asked breaking the silence.

"Really?" Bella beamed as her chest swelled.

"Yes. I can't explain it, but this…how I feel about you is so natural. It's like I've known you forever."

"It's all that fantastic sex," Bella teased.

"It's not all about the sex, although it is fantastic," he added.

"I think about the time at your house all the time," Bella admitted shyly.

"That was amazing."

Bella's skin tingled as she remembered how she felt that day with him. How he'd pushed her out of her sexual comfort zone. How excited she felt watching him touch himself. How surprised she was that touching herself for him turned her on.

She found it incredibly erotic to have him watch her. To show him how she pleased herself when she was alone. She'd never shared anything so intimately personal before.

It made her wonder about something else she'd always wanted to try.

"Why are you so quiet, Isabella?" Carlisle asked softly.

Bella instantly blushed.

"I was just thinking."

"About?"

"You and me…at the house," she answered slowly. Bella heard him shift, like he was trying to get more comfortable. "I was just thinking…." Why was this so hard for her to say?

"Tell me, Isabella," he encouraged.

She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. "I was just thinking how much it turned me on to watch you touch yourself," she breathed.

Carlisle's sharp intake of breath was the only response.

"And how much it turned me on to touch myself for you," she added.

"Isabella," he half moaned, "that is something I'll never forget."

Bella smiled, feeling a little more confident now.

"What would you say if I told you I was incredibly turned on by thinking about you touching yourself?" she asked seductively.

"I'd say you're a tease," Carlisle laughed. "And then I'd tell you that think about you has done the same to me."

Bella squirmed on the bed suddenly feeling the empty ache between her legs more than before. Her mind went back to what she had been wondering about before. Would he think it was immature of her to suggest such a thing?

"Isabella, what are you wearing?" he suddenly asked.

The butterflies in her stomach danced with excitement at the question.

"Um…" Should she be honest and boring, or lie and add a little excitement to the conversation. "Well…yoga pants and a t-shirt." She cringed hearing her answer. Maybe she wasn't going to be very good at this.

Carlisle groaned softly. "Did you know that's my favorite thing for you to wear?"

_Huh?_

"Really?"

"Definitely. I love the way those pants hug your ass."  
_  
He__'__d been watching her ass? _

Bella pressed her lips together to contain the school girl squeal that wanted to burst out of her.

"What kind of panties are you wearing, Isabella?"

"Boyshorts." She grinned at his groan.

"I want to see you in only those and a tank top," he told her.

"How fast can you get here?" she laughed.

"Not fast enough," he said. "But if you're not opposed to the idea there is something else we could do."

"And what would that be, Dr. Cullen?"

"I love when you call me that," he sighed. "Take your pants off and I'll show you," he said answering her flirtatious question.

Bella tucked her cell between her ear and shoulder so she could slide her pants off.

"Now I want you to close your eyes and think of me beside you," Carlisle instructed.

"Okay."

"And do not touch yourself unless I tell you to," he commanded. "Any where."

She was in so much trouble.

"I'm softly kissing your neck," he started. "I'm kissing your ear; gently I suck the lobe into my mouth. I tease it with my tongue, before tracing the shell of your ear. My soft breathing tickles it, making you shiver."

Bella did shiver.

"Isabella, I want you to lick the tip of your finger and slowly drag it over your ear," he whispered.

_Seriously?_

"Do it, Isabella," he said sensing her hesitation.

Bella sucked the tip of her finger into her mouth and ran her tongue over it. She brought it to her ear and slowly traced it.

"Oh!" Bella gasped surprised by the shiver than ran up her spine. It actually felt like his tongue!

"Tell me how it feels."

"It feels good," Bella answered. "Better than I thought it would."

Carlisle softly chuckled.

"I'm kissing along your jaw line now," he continued. "I brush your lips with mine, so gentle you barely feel it, but it leaves you aching for more."

"Mmmhmm. I am definitely aching for more," she moaned into the phone.

"I turn you on your side, facing away from me. I brush my hand over your bare back, dragging my fingers up and down your spine. My hand cups the curve of your ass and I hitch your leg over my hip, my cock straining between your legs."

Bella whimpered and squeezed her thighs together. This no touching thing was torture.

"Cup your breasts for me, Isabella," Carlisle whispered. "Pinch your nipples. Think of my teeth gently nipping at them."

"Mmm," Bella moaned squeezing as she was told. "Your mouth always feels amazing on my chest."

"With your hands do exactly as I say I'm doing," he instructed. "I run my hand down your stomach as I kiss your shoulders and neck. I cover your mound and dip my middle finger between your drenched folds."

Bella sharply inhaled as she spread her legs and slipped her hand beneath the waistband of her underwear and slid her finger against her wetness.

"Tell me how wet you are."

"Soaking," she said closing her eyes as she explored her body. "My finger is drenched."

Carlisle groaned and said, "Slide your finger inside, baby. First one and then two."

"Oh, yes!" Bella cried thrusting her fingers inside her wet center.

"I love how fucking tight you are around my cock," Carlisle grunted. "It feels like your fist gripping me," he added.

"Carlisle," Bella panted. _Did she really feel like that?_

He groaned and his breathing quickened.

"Isabella, you feel so good wrapped around me. So fucking good. I want you to come for me, Isabella. I want you to come around your fingers as hard as you come on my cock."

Bella flicked her clit with her thumb while she plunged her fingers in and out of herself. With her other hand she firmly massaged her breast. She felt like she was going to break out in a sweat, her body stiffened, and her heart beat faster. She curled her fingers inside herself and pinched her nipple simultaneously. Then suddenly it felt like her heart had stopped before exploding and her walls clamped down around her fingers.

"Carlisle!" she cried into the phone. "Oh, God, I'm coming!"

"Fuck, yes!" On the other end she heard him hiss out a breath and groan. They both lay there quiet afterwards trying to catch their breath. Quietly Carlisle asked, "Would you believe this was the first time I've done this?"

"Really? You mean I took your phone virginity?" Bella asked unbelieving.

Carlisle laughed. "I guess you did." And then he sighed heavily. "I hate that I don't know when I'll be able to get away to come back there."

"Maybe I could come there," Bella said. "I mean…if you want."

"Why do you doubt that I want you?"

_Um, because you__'__re a God?_

"I know you're busy, Carlisle. I wouldn't want to be a distraction or bother you," she said.

"If you don't mind being alone while I'm on shift you're more than welcome to come. I would really like to have you here."

"Really?"

"Of course. We'll have to figure something out." She heard his phone beep before he said, "The movers are calling, I really should talk to them."

"Right. Go take care of business. Have a great first day at work."

"Thank you." She heard the smile in his voice. "I'll talk to you soon."

"Bye, Carlisle."

Bella closed the phone, yanked her pants into place, covered herself with a blanket and closed her eyes. Images of Carlisle flashed behind her closed lids as she drifted off to sleep.

******

"Hey, Sleeping Beauty."

The fuzzy image of Alice slowly cleared as Bella rubbed her eyes.

"What time is it?" she asked groggy.

"Time for you to get up. You're missing all the fun."

Bella snorted. "What fun?"

"Okay, so there's no fun yet. But I'm tired of listening to Edward and Jasper debate whether Jessica Alba or Jessica Biel have the hotter bikini bod."

"Seriously?"

"I know, right? I can't believe it either. Alba wins hands down."

Bella rolled her eyes.

"C'mon," Alice pulled at her. "We've got pizza and beer."

"I'd much rather sleep," Bella said as she rolled over and pulled at her covers.

"Is this about Edward?"

"No."

"What happened when he came up here?" Alice asked.

"We sort of got into an argument."

"Again?" This time Alice rolled her eyes. "Bella, you need to get rid of this sexual tension between the two of you."

"Ugh! Not you, too!" Bella groaned.

"He said the same thing?"

"Yeah, he's a self absorbed ass."

"Who only has ass on his mind?" Alice grinned.

"Exactly."

"Whatever. Ignore him, but get up. Now." Alice grabbed the blanket and threw it off her.

Good thing she'd gotten dressed before falling asleep.

"You know you're a pain in the ass, right?" Bella grumbled getting out of bed. She grabbed a sweater off the chair and pulled it on.

"You've been telling me that for years." Alice swatted her butt as she shuffled towards the bathroom and laughed. "Hurry up," she called bouncing down the stairs.

Bella took her time in the bathroom, childishly hoping if she waited long enough Edward might not be there when she went down.

_Where would he go?_

_Oh, I dunno. Back to hell? Lucifer must be lonely without him._

She splashed some water on her face to look more awake and then went downstairs.

"Wow, Bella," Edward said as soon as she descended the stairs, "you look like you've just walked off the set of the Living Dead."

Bella flipped him off on the way to the kitchen.

"Okay kids, you have to play nice tonight," Jasper said.

"I'm always nice," Edward said.

"Yeah, as nice as a baby rattler." Jasper retorted.

"I think I'd choose the snake," Bella muttered picking the mushrooms off her pizza slice.

"Sorry, I forgot to tell them no fungus," Alice said.

Bella shrugged. "No problem."

"So, what are we doing tonight?" Jasper asked flinging his arm over Alice's shoulders.

"Not much to do in town," Bella said.

"So I've noticed. How did you live here?" Jasper teased.

Bella shrugged again. "I was young so I didn't know the difference. My teen years were spent in Phoenix."

"I guess we're stuck watching movies then," Alice said.

"Or we could get drunk." Jasper grinned and grabbed one of the six packs off the table.

"Woohoo!" Alice cried. "I vote get drunk!"

"Bella, where does your dad keep the hard stuff?" Jasper looked at her. "Don't worry, I'll replace it."

"Check the cabinet under the wine rack," Bella suggested.

She watched Jasper raid her father's liquor cabinet and pull out an unopened bottle of scotch and four shooter glasses.

"To the living room my friends," he said grabbing Alice around the waist.

Bella sighed and followed them. She sat at the far end of the couch, far away from Edward who was watching her.

"Who knows a good drinking game?" Jasper asked placing the scotch and glasses on the coffee table.

"Oh!" Alice bounced with excitement. "What about 'I've never'?"

"That's so high school," Bella said.

"So?"

"I've never played," Edward said sliding from the chair to the floor and leaning over to inspect the scotch.

"It's easy. We take turns saying things we've never done, but whoever else has done it has to take a shot."

"There's not much you haven't done, Alice," Bella teased. "You'll be drunk before any of us."

Alice stuck her tongue out at her.

"I'm game," Jasper said.

"Sure." Edward looked at Bella. "Could be interesting."

"Great!" Jasper filled everyone's glass. "Bella, you go first."

Bella rolled her eyes.

"Fine. I've never….cheated on a test."

"Predictable," Edward said before taking his shot. Alice and Jasper did the same.

_Apparently, she was the only honest one here. _

"I've never," Jasper said as he filled the glasses again and grinned at Bella, "lived in a small town."

Bella shook her head and threw back the shot, swallowing quickly. She was the only one who drank.

"I've never been in love," Alice said.

Again, Bella was the only one who drank. She looked at Edward waiting for him to drink his, but he never reached for it.

_What about Tanya?_

"I've never been camping," Edward said looking at his glass.

Bella and Jasper drank.

"I've never been arrested," Bella said.

No one reached for their glass.

"Hmm…I've never kissed a dude," Jasper said.

Bella and Alice laughed and took their shot.

"I've never had a threesome," Alice confessed.

Jasper blushed as he grabbed his drink.

"Oh my God!" Bella laughed.

"I never would have guessed!" Alice cried.

Jasper just shrugged and grinned at everyone.

"I've never been with a woman over thirty," Edward said.

"Maybe you should change that to 'partner' instead of 'woman'." Jasper winked. "So the girls can play, too. Unless there's something they're not telling us."

"Okay, I've never had a partner over thirty," Edward said revising his confession.

Bella glanced at Alice before they both drank.

"Seriously?" Edward looked at her surprised. "I would have expected Alice, but not you."

"Why not me?" she asked slightly offended.

"You just seem so…prim and proper I guess."

"I've never made out with a girl," she said ignoring Edward's comment.

Jasper whooped as Alice picked up her glass along with him and Edward.

"Okay, I've never had sex in a public place," Jasper admitted.

Edward almost chocked on his scotch when Bella drained her glass.

"I don't believe it!" Jasper exclaimed.

"Believe it," Alice said. "It was outside a night club."

"Alice!"

"Someone's full of surprises tonight," Edward said. "I didn't peg you as the exhibitionist type."

"You don't know me very well," Bella said. She was starting to feel warm. The alcohol was definitely having an effect on her.

"So much for prim and proper, huh, Edward," Jasper said.

Edward shook his head and looked at Alice.

"I've never had sex in my parent's house," Alice said.

Bella blushed as she drank with the guys. Jasper laughed at her embarrassment and patted her on the back.

"As long as it wasn't with the old guy it's all good," he told her.

Her cheeks burned now.

"Holy shit!" Jasper burst into fits of giggles. "You did grandpa in your parent's house?"

Alice spit her beer out all over the coffee table.

"That's no ones business," Bella huffed. "Besides, we're not playing twenty questions."

"Maybe we should," Edward said.

"Shut up," Bella told him. "It's your turn."

"I've never had sex in a vehicle," he said.

Bella stared at her glass for a few seconds before swallowing its contents once again. She set her glass down and closed her eyes.

"C'mon, Bella," Jasper said. "Nothing to be ashamed of."

"I've never been with a younger guy…er, partner," she said keeping her head down and eyes closed.

"Not yet," Edward muttered.

She opened her eyes just in time to see him take his shot.

"I've never had cyber sex," Jasper declared.

Finally, she didn't have to drink.

"I've never had phone sex."

_Ugh!_

She drank and Alice clapped. "That's my girl!"

Only eight shots down and the room was already starting to spin.

"I've never played with sex toys," Edward said making everyone laugh.

Not surprisingly Alice drank.

"I've never watched porn," Bella giggled.

Everyone else had.

"I've never been with a virgin," Jasper said.

No one else had either.

"I've never played an instrument," Alice said. Everyone looked at her. "What? I've run out of things I've never done sexually," she whined.

Edward rolled his eyes and drank.

"I've never been caught having sex," he said.

Bella laughed.

"What?"

"Is being heard the same as being caught?" she asked with a giggle.

"Sure." Edward smiled at her as she drained her glass.

"Okay Bella, you're turn."

"Umm…I've never cheated."

Both Edward and Alice looked slightly embarrassed as they drank.

"I've never been cheated on," Jasper said. "That I know of anyway," he added looking thoughtful.

Bella slammed her glass down a little too hard.

"Oops," she laughed and then sighed. "James was a dick."

"I'll drink to that." Alice raised her beer.

"Me, too!" Bella cried grabbing Edward's bottle.

"I think someone's a light weight," Edward said watching Bella guzzle down the rest of his beer.

"Oh! Oh!" Bella's eyes widened with excitement. "I've never lifted weights!"

"Me neither!" Alice looked thoughtful. "But that means we can't drink."

"I think they both are," Jasper laughed.

"Maybe this was a bad idea," Edward said.

"Oh, don't be such a stick lover," Bella said.

"A stick lover?" Edward cocked an eyebrow.

"Yeah, you know, pull the stick out of your ass," she whispered.

"Ew, ew, ew! Nothing goes up my ass!" Alice shouted.

"Oh! Let's drink to that!" Bella bellowed.

"Oh, boy." Edward shook his head.

"We need music!" Alice jumped up and stumbled her way over to the stereo. She immediately started grinding against Jasper who had followed her over there.

"I think you better slow down," Edward cautioned as Bella refilled her glass.

"Imma big girl," Bella slurred. "I got dressed all by myself this morning."

"Awesome. That deserves a gold star," he said.

"Why didn't you love Tanya?" Bella asked. Even drunk she could tell it caught him off guard.

"Love is a very strong word that is thrown around too much without meaning. At twenty, I'm too young to know what real love is," he answered honestly.

"Or you're just afraid," she challenged.

"Why don't you have another drink," he told her dryly.

"Why don't you grow a pair and be honest and cut the shit," she snapped back.

"Are you an angry drunk?" Edward smirked.

"I'm a smart drunk," Bella said.

"Hey guys!" Alice threw a deck of cards on the table. "Let's play strip poker."  
_  
A smart drunk knew that was a bad idea. _

"I don't think so," Bella said.

"Awe, c'mon, Bella," Alice pouted.

"Truth or dare then?" Edward grinned.

_Much safer_.

"Truth or dare?" Alice muttered looking at Jasper who winked.

"Bella, truth or dare?" Edward asked.

"Uh, truth."

"Who was the guy over thirty?"

_So much for safe!_

"I change my mind," Bella said. "I choose dare."

"I dare you to play strip poker." His crooked grin widened.

Bella opened her mouth, but no sound came out. Alice gleefully laughed.

"I hate you," she hissed at Edward.

"Truth or dare, Bella."

"Deal the damn cards," she mumbled. "I don't even know how to play poker."

"This game is sounding better and better," Edward said smiling at her comment. "Whoever wins the round gets to choose who strips."

Jasper gave her a quick run down of how the game was played, but it didn't help. She couldn't make heads or tails of it and ended up losing her sweater right away. She'd never been so glad in her life to be wearing two shirts.

Thankfully, Alice won the second hand and had Jasper take off his shirt, and Jasper won the third hand and made Alice strip as payback.

As long as those two won the rounds she'd be safe.

And then Edward won the fourth.

"Alright Bella, shirt or pants."

"Ha! In your dreams." She pulled her socks off and dangled them in his face.

He laughed and grabbed them from her.

"Next time, sweetie," he threatened. "And who wears socks in the summer?"

"My feet are cold!"

Fifth and sixth hands went to Jasper, leaving Alice in just her shirt and panties.

"Okay, someone start kicking his butt!" she cried.

"What do I have here?" Bella asked laying her cards on the table.

Alice looked at her cards and cheered, "Bella, you won!"

"I did?"

"Yes! Now make Edward strip."

Bella looked at him and swallowed over the lump that had formed in her throat.

"I guess it's only fair since you haven't lost anything yet," she told him.

"If you insist." He stood up and slowly unbuckled his jeans and winked at her as he dropped his pants.

Bella hadn't been prepared to see his pants go. She thought he'd start with his shirt like everyone else. He sat back down only wearing his boxers and shirt.

"You're next," he told her.

And she was.

"Lose something, honey."

Bella took another shot of scotch. Suddenly an idea came to her and she smiled.

"You got it." She reached under the back of her shirt, unclipped her bra and slid her arms out from the straps and pulled it out from under her shirt. "There you go," she said flinging it at him. "You won't be seeing an inch of my skin if I can help it."

"Ah, but you're all out of tricks now," Edward pointed out. "You're screwed the next round I win."

The dirty playing poker gods must have been on her side because the next two rounds went to Alice, leaving Jasper in only his boxers.

"I think this is when we take the party upstairs," Alice said eyeing him.

"Lead the way," he said grinning. "Night you two," he called over his shoulder chasing Alice upstairs.

Bella heard a giggle and the bedroom door slam.

"What do you have?" Edward asked looking at her cards.

"I have no idea."

"Hmm, not bad." He nodded. "You beat me."

"Really?" She looked at his cards, but had no idea if he was lying or not.

"Yep." He pulled off his shirt.

Bella's eyes roamed over his body. His chest looked just as great as it had felt the other night. He wasn't six pack made, but he was solid.

She quickly took another drink to wet her dry throat.

"Last hand," Edward said shuffling the cards.

"I think I'm done."

"One more hand. Please?" He stopped dealing the cards waiting for her answer, and against her better judgement she nodded.

They played in silence, only speaking when necessary until Edward laid down his cards. She put hers down and looked at him, waiting for him to tell her who won.

"I win."

_Of course he did._

"I'll give you a choice."

"A choice?" Her head felt fuzzy.

"You can take off your clothes, or kiss me."

Bella rolled her eyes. Some choice. Both led to trouble.

"What about the third choice?" She pouted. Edward looked at her. "We go to bed."

"Together?" He grinned wickedly.

"No."

"Sorry, no choice three then."

Bella bit her lip trying to decide which was the lesser of the two evils. It wasn't like she was naked underneath her pants. Her panties covered up more than a bathing suit did. Or she could kiss him and give him what she knew he really wanted.

Inhaling deeply, Bella stood, hooked her thumbs into the waist of her pants and pulled them down.

"Happy?" she asked softly.

"Not entirely," he answered. "I was hoping you'd choose the kiss."

"I know." She sat back down, drawing her legs up and wrapping her arms around them.

Edward got off the floor and sat next to her on the couch.

"Are you that afraid of what might happen if you kiss me?" he asked.

"Nothing would happen," she said. The room was getting fuzzier and she had to concentrate harder on his words.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Then prove it."

"Is this how you get action? By tricking women into sleeping with you with dares?" she looked at him skeptically.

"Not usually, but you make it fun."

"I'm going to bed," Bella said standing too quickly.

The room spun and she lost her footing and ended up landing in Edward's lap. Her bottom was pressed directly over his crotch which wasn't hidden very well from the thin cotton of his boxers. Bella tried to get up, but only ended up wiggling in his lap which did not help the situation.

"Stop wiggling your fucking ass, woman," Edward groaned grabbing her hips and holding her still. "That's not helping either of us."

Bella didn't move another muscle. She could feel his cock pressed against her bottom, getting harder with each second that past.

She looked at him and caught him watching her, his green eyes dark. Her head screamed for her to move when he bent his head closer to hers, but she couldn't. He paused right as his lips touched hers, before pressing his mouth onto hers completely. His tongue invaded her mouth; his hands slid up her ribcage and brushed the sides of her breasts with his thumbs.

With actions quicker than she could comprehend, he had her on her back. He hovered over her, pressing his arousal between her legs as his mouth continued its assault on her lips. Bella closed her eyes as the room suddenly spun out of control.

She woke pinned beneath an arm.

Why was Alice all over her?

Bella went to free herself, but stopped when her fingers brushed hair. Way more hair than Alice had on her arm.

Her head throbbed as she moved, turning to look at who was beside her.

She instantly felt as though her stomach had dropped as she looked into Edward's sleeping face.

She could hardly breathe. Her heart was pounding furiously.

_What the hell had she done?_

***gasp* Did she? Didn't she? What a mess Bella has herself in now. Please keep the reviews coming! They still make me giddy to read, every single one of them!**


	13. Sex in Seattle

**Love to all of you who keep reading and reviewing. And to fellow writers who recommend this story to their readers. That is the biggest compliment ever!**

**SM still owns everything Twilight. I just like to borrow her characters and make them do dirty things. **

_Holy fuck!_

Why was she in bed with Edward?

What the hell had she done?

_Ohmygod, what had they done?!_

Bella closed her eyes and tried to remember. Bits and pieces of the night before flashed through her mind. A drinking game. Lots of alcohol. Edward kissing her…. Her kissing him. His hands on her…

_Had they…? No! Oh, please God no!_

Bella slowly lifted the blanket and peaked underneath. Her shirt was still on, but she could tell her bra was missing. And she didn't have to see to know that her pants were MIA, but thankfully she still wore her panties.

_What the hell had happened?_

Bella shoved Edward's arm off her not caring if she woke him, just desperate to find her clothes. She sat up, hugging the sheet to her body and leaned over the arm of the couch searching for her pants.

"Looking for these?"

Bella snapped her head up and she looked at Edward who held her pants up like a prize.

"Give me those," she demanded.

"You weren't in a hurry last night to get them back," he snickered.

She swallowed back the vomit that wanted to come up.

"What happened last night?" she asked.

"What do you remember?"

She shook her head which throbbed in protest. "Playing a game with lots of scotch."

"Anything else?"

"You kissed me…" She glared at him. "Again."

"You didn't put up much of a fight. Again." He grinned.

"Why are we in bed together and why am I missing my clothes?" she demanded. "We didn't…" She looked away and then back at him. "Did we have sex?" she asked terrified of the answer.

Edward saw the panic written all over her face and shook his head. "Don't worry nothing happened."

"Then why am I half naked?" she cried.

He tossed her the pants and got off the pull out.

"Strip poker," he said simply, yanking his jeans on.

"I wouldn't play strip poker."

"Sober you wouldn't, but drunk you is pretty fun. Although," he added putting his hands on his hips and grinning at her, "sober you sounds pretty fun, too."

"What does that mean?"

"All those fun facts you shared last night about yourself were great. Some of them very surprising," he said crawling back onto the bed.

"What are you talking about?" Fear tightened her chest.

"You've had sex outside a night club, in a car, in your parents' house and with a guy over thirty. The first one is the one that shocked me the most." He watched her closely, waiting for her reaction.

"I remember some of that," she muttered to herself.

"That's how I got you to play strip poker. It was a very short game of-"

"Truth or dare," she mumbled.

He smiled. "Yep."

"So, nothing happened between us besides that kiss?"

"Sadly, no. You passed out and I don't take advantage of unconscious girls."

"What a gentleman," Bella said dryly even though she was beyond relieved.

"I try."

She pulled the blanket closer to her body and avoided looking at him.

"Disappointed?" he asked.

"More like relieved," she told him. "I'm not comfortable with cheating. Unlike you apparently." She looked at him remembering what he had confessed last night.

"How can you cheat on someone you're not even with?" Edward asked, amused.

"How can you cheat on someone you _are_ with?"

"It was high school, nothing serious."

"So that makes it okay?" she asked, disgusted.

"No, but it was high school." He shrugged. "Who takes anything serious in high school?"

"It sounds like you're just trying to make excuses for your actions," she accused.

"How is that making an excuse?" He looked irritated. "I admit I didn't take the relationship seriously. End of story."

Bella shook her head and looked away.

"Now tell me how you can cheat on someone you're _not _with."

"You wouldn't understand," Bella muttered.

"Try me."

"I don't want to." She sounded like a pouty child even to herself.

"You know, for someone that tells everyone else to grow a pair and cut the shit you don't take your own advice very well," he told her.

Bella refused to look at him. He was the last person she could be honest with about this.

"How about a truce?" Edward offered.

"Is this anything like your crappy piece offering?" she asked.

"It's better." He smiled. "You stop being a bitch-" Bella opened her mouth to argue, but he continued, "and I'll stop being a self absorbed arrogant jackass."

She closed her mouth and thought about what he said.

_Was that even possible?_

"Why?" she finally asked.

"I figure this way we'll both get some answers."

"What if I don't want to give you answers?"

"Then what's the point of you constantly telling me to get real if you can't?"

_Damn it!_

"So?" he asked after a few minutes.

"Fine, but I get to go first," she said remembering something from last night.

"Do you have control issues?"

"Do you want to do it or not?" she snapped.

"Oh, I want to do it." He grinned. "But let's do this first."

"Edward, I swear-"

"Okay, sorry." He held up his hands. "You can go first."

"Why didn't you love Tanya?" She watched his emerald eyes darken. "The truth."

"What I told you last night was the truth."

"I want to know the real reason. You were with her for two years, right?" He nodded. "Two years is a long time to be with someone you don't love."

Edward remained silent.

"What about her?" Bella asked. "No woman I know would be with a man that long who didn't love her."

He continued to stare at her, but made no attempt to explain himself. She waited, determined to make him answer. This was his idea after all.

But after almost five minutes of silence her patients wore out.

"Fine." She started to gather the blankets around herself to make a half descent exit. "If you're not going to talk then I'm going upstairs to bed." _Even though it's almost noon._

"Wait," he sighed.

She stilled and waited.

"You just answered your own question," he said. Bella narrowed her eyes in confusion. "Tanya isn't like any other woman," he told her.

"Okay," she said still confused.

"Tanya doesn't expect me to shower her with compliments, words of affection, shiny jewellery or expensive nights out. She doesn't expect anything from me," he said softly looking behind Bella rather than at her.

She didn't miss the present tense Edward used to describe his ex. Maybe things weren't as over as he thought they were.

"Tanya is focused on her career. She says in the dance world you're only there for a certain amount of time before someone greater comes along."

"Isn't that true with any career?" Bella asked.

"There's always someone better no matter what you do." He nodded. "She explained it to me like this: it takes other professionals, doctors, lawyers, you know those kinds of people, years to build up their careers. Dancers either have it or they don't, and even if they do there's always someone younger who can come along next year who does it better."

"I see. She has a fear of losing her place on the high pedestal ABC has put her on," Bella said. He nodded again. "Eventually, it's going to happen though."

"And she knows that. That's why she doesn't care about anything else right now. She's focused on one thing right now and nothing else matters."

"You mean you don't matter," Bella said softly.

Edward looked at her, his eyes darker than before.

"My actions don't matter," he corrected her. "She doesn't care if I love her of not because her head is somewhere else right now. In fact," he added thoughtfully, "I think that's one of the attractions she has to me. I wasn't pouring my heart out to her. I wasn't thinking of marriage and white picket fences with a mutt and two kids. She doesn't want it right now and I'm too young to take it seriously."

"She's twenty-six, right? Isn't that something she might start to want soon?"

He laughed, but it sounded more annoyed than amused.

"You're not getting this," he said, frustrated. "Until her career is over it's not something she's ever going to want." He looked at her. "She doesn't want the distraction."

"Then why was she even with you? Isn't having a boyfriend distracting?" Bella asked thinking of her experiences.

"She has her life, I have mine. We don't feel the need to be with each other all the time. We get together when we can and that's enough for us."

"So, if it works for both of you why did you break up with her?" she asked curiously. Edward shifted his eyes away and suddenly looked uncomfortable. "Oh!" Bella cried catching on. "She broke up with you!"

"Yes," he answered coolly.

"Why?"

"She doesn't think it's fair to me. She thinks if I'm able to meet someone new I might love them and she doesn't want to hold me back from that just because she's not ready."

"And you disagree?"

"I'm not an idiot, Bella," he said harshly. "I'm not going to jump into something with someone who wants the whole nine yards right now."

"Is it something you want though? Not right now, but in time?"

"Do you?" he asked instead of answering.

"I…" Bella started at him not sure how to answer. "I don't know. Marriage isn't high on my priority list."

"So, you never want to get married?" he asked skeptically.

"I don't know," she repeated. "I'm not looking for it, but-"

"But if the opportunity presents itself you might consider it?" He smirked.

She glared at him. "Maybe."

"Did you always feel that way or is it because of James?" he asked.

Bella looked at him, surprised. "How do you know about James?"

"You mentioned him last night."

"I did?" Her eyes grew wide.

"Nothing in detail. Just that he was a prick." His smirk slid into a genuine smile.

"Oh." She blinked back the angry tears that wanted to spill. "James was everything I thought I wanted," she confessed quietly. "I never thought he was capable of doing what he did or of hurting me like he did."

"So it is because of him?" Edward pushed.

"No, he doesn't have that kind of control over me. Did he make it hard to trust someone again?" She looked at him and nodded. "Absolutely. But I've slowly gotten past it."

"All because of this wonderful man that won't commit to you?" The question dripped with sarcasm.

"Why are you so hung up on my personal life? What's it to you if I am or I'm not with this guy? And who says _he_ won't commit? Maybe it's me who doesn't want commitment."

She turned to face him and realized for the first time she was having this conversation with him in only her underwear. Blushing, she tucked the blanket behind her to be sure no skin was exposed.

Edward caught her and laughed.

"I've seen what you're hiding under there, Bella," he said.

"That doesn't mean you have too see it again."

"Would you like me to close my eyes so you can get dressed?" he joked.

"Yes, as a matter of fact I would," she said lifting her chin.

The laughter died on his lips.

"Are you serious?"

"What do you think?"

Edward looked at her for a minute before sighing heavily and closing his eyes.

Bella scurried out from the blanket and quickly pulled her pants on. She settled back on the bed and told him he could open his eyes.

"So I assume this guy is older," Edward continued.

Bella rolled her eyes.

"This again?"

"I was honest with you about Tanya. It's your turn now."

_Maybe now would be a good time to get sick. _

"Yes, he's older," Bella answered.

"From Phoenix?"

She bit her lip. How truthful should she really be?

"No."

"How did you meet?"

"It was just coincidental. We were in the same place at the same time." She glanced at him quickly. "It's new so that's why we haven't put a label on anything yet."

"How new?" he asked squinting at her.

"Just a couple of weeks." _Almost._

"Do you think it will become serious?"

How many times was she going to be asked that?

"I don't know," she sighed.

"Do you want it to?" he asked looking at her closely.

_Yes._

"I don't know."

"Hmm." He started at her thoughtfully and then grinned. "That still makes you a free agent."

"I guess it would." She shrugged and looked down at her hands.

Would this be a good time to ask him about Carlisle? Would he be as open and honest about their relationship as he had been about Tanya?

Silence fell around them until she heard him sigh and swear under his breath.

"Ask."

She looked at him confused again.

"Ask?"

"What you've been dying to know since we met." He held her gaze, looking at her with such certainty as if he could read her mind.

_Did he mean…?_

"Will you answer if I do?" she asked barely above a whisper.

"I've been truthful so far," he stated.

She bit her lip. Did she really want to know the full details of the lies he'd been told?

"Why do you hate your father?" she asked softly.

He finally broke their eye contact and shook his head.

"I don't know my father," he mumbled. "Sure, he was around when I was growing up, but I don't know him. And I don't have a mother. If it wasn't for Esme I'd feel like an orphan."

"I'm sure your father did the best he could do being a single parent."

"Yeah, he did. He made something of himself so he cold provide for me. I get that." He looked at Bella. "I really do get that, Bella. But he forgot about me in the process. He was always so busy, everything else came first. The price of giving me everything was losing me."

"He's a sur-"

"Do you know how many concerts, school plays or events he attended when I was little?" he asked cutting her off. "All of them," he told her not waiting for an answer.

"That's a good thing, Edward."

"No." He sneered. "He never stayed until the end. I'd say my first line, play my first note, hit my first ball and he'd be gone. He never really had time for me because he made such a great success of himself."

"At least he made the effort to show up," she said defending Carlisle. "He tried to make time for you."

"But he didn't have the time. Why drive the mother of your child away and make her leave if you don't have the time to be a parent? Why not let her take him so he'd have somebody there all the time!" he cried, and then half laughed. "He ignored her, too. He put everything before her and she got sick of it and wanted something more. That's why she left," he spat, "because of him. She had no family, no friends and no way to provide for me so he made her leave me."

"Edward-"

"He took away the one person that could have loved me like he should have," he muttered bitterly.

"You were so young there's no way you could remember that. Who told you that's why she left?" Bella asked already knowing the answer.

"He did."

Bella was silent, debating whether she should say what she wanted to say or not. Would it give something away? Would it hurt him? Make him angry?

"Mothers just don't leave, Edward," Bella told him gently. "Mothers who want their children fight for them. Even if she couldn't provide for you she would have found a way to stay in your life. Women who want their children don't just walk away because they don't want to be with the father anymore."

He glared at her, his eyes shimmering with tears he wouldn't let escape in front of her.

"Are you saying my mother didn't want me?" Anger deepened his voice.

"I don't have children, but if I did there's no way anyone could make me leave them," she said speaking slowly, thoughtfully.

He stared at her. All emotion had left his eyes and they were now cold and dark. His face hardened and his lips were white from pressing them together so tightly.

A small ripple of fear ran down Bella's spine. This Edward looked vicious. Inhuman. This Edward terrified her.

"She was young and scared and felt like she didn't have a choice," Edward snarled.

Bella found it ironic that he could defend a woman he'd never known and yet find fault with a man who'd tried to give him everything.

"Everyone has a choice. Especially a parent," she whispered.

"Not her. Not her because of him."

She could tell this wasn't going to go anywhere.

"I'm sorry I asked," Bella said quickly getting out of bed. "Actually, I'm sorry I upset you. Thank you for telling me your side."

"Bella, I…" He watched her gather the rest of her clothes in silence.

"Maybe it's time you start to forgive, Edward. Before you lose your father, too." She turned her back to him and hurried upstairs to the bathroom. She turned the water on as hot as she could stand it and jumped in.

Her heart ached for Edward. Seeing the kind of turmoil he was in she had to agree with Esme. Edward needed to know the truth so he could work things out with his father. Carlisle wasn't doing Edward or himself any good by keeping this lie up anymore.

Sure, he'd be upset. Pissed. Livid even. But in time Bella was positive Edward would come around. There was more to them than he let people see. More than he wanted people to know for some reason. Maybe Jasper was right. Maybe he was trying to protect himself from everyone.

He'd apparently opened himself up to Tanya and she'd turned him away too; even if she was doing what she thought was right. And despite what Edward said, Bella was certain he felt more for her than he was letting on.

Was that why he'd been trying so hard to be with her? He was on the rebound and looking for a distraction?

She lathered her hair and frowned.

That was better than him knowing about her and Carlisle, but she didn't like the idea of being his rebound attempt either.

She rinsed the shampoo out and washed the soap off her body. She turned the shower off and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around herself.

She'd never been so freaked out as she had been that morning waking up next to Edward. She knew playing that stupid game was a bad idea. What would she have done if she had slept with him? How would she have explained that to Carlisle?

_Would you have?_

The thought caught her off guard. Wouldn't she have? Didn't she have to considering what was going on between them?

Bella stared at her reflection as if she expected it to tell her the answers. Her eyes darted over her face, searching for the truth.

Damn the voice inside her head for making her feel this confused.

_The voice inside her head?_

"Yeah, now you are crazy," she muttered.

"Hey, Crazy." Alice knocked on the door. "Open up. I have to pee."

Bella opened the door a crack and glared at her friend.

"What?" Alice asked.

"You left me alone last night with him," Bella accused.

"Holding your hand," Alice said raising her left hand, "or getting some hot action." She held out her right hand and pretended to weigh the options. "Yeah, hot action trumps you." She grinned and pushed her way into the bathroom. "Oh, I think you might want to check your phone," Alice told her as she left the bathroom.

Bella turned, but the door slammed in her face.

"Is Jasper in there?" she sighed.

"Downstairs."

Bella pulled the towel tighter around herself and hurried across the hall to grab some clothes. She spied her phone the dresser and snatched it up before going to dress in her dad and Esme's room.

Just as she pulled her sweater over her head Alice barged in.

"What happened last night that has your panties in a twist?" she demanded.

"Nothing." Bella avoided her eyes.

"Oh my God!" Alice gasped. "Did you and Edward do the dirty?"

"No!"

"Oh." She looked disappointed for a second. "Then why are you so upset?"

"I woke up this morning next to him half naked and unable to remember anything!" Bella cried.

Alice's mouth formed a perfect 'o' and then she grinned.

"Really? What did he say happened?"

"That I passed out after playing strip poker."

"Yeah, that was fun."

"Alice!"

She shrugged. "So you passed out and he put you to bed. Big deal."

"It could have been a big deal," Bella muttered.

"But it's not which is kind of a shame."

"Alice-"

"I know, I know. C'mon, I'm starving."

Bella huffed and grabbed her phone, following Alice downstairs. She paused at the bottom of the stairs, searching for the man in question. Satisfied he was no where around, she trailed Alice to the kitchen.

She grabbed a bowl of cereal, even though it was well into the lunch hour, and checked her messages as she ate. There were two missed calls from her mother. Bella felt slightly disappointed Carlisle hadn't called.

"Don't you think Jasper's great?" Alice chirped next to her.

"Amazing," Bella mumbled around a mouthful of food.

"I swear he makes my girlie parts do crazy things just by looking at me. And the things he does when he touches me-"

"Ugh! Alice, I'm eating," Bella protested.

"Don't be a prude, Bella."

"Don't over share, Alice." She looked around. "Speaking of which, where are they?"

"I'd tell you, but I wouldn't want to over share." Alice smirked.

Bella rolled her eyes.

"Like that's ever stopped you before."

Alice smiled mischievously. "We ran out of condoms. Which you better be using, too." Bella blushed and ducked her head. "Bella? Please, tell me you're not being stupid."

"I'm not being stupid."

"Okay, now tell me the truth."

"This is really none of your business." Bella pushed away from the table and put her bowl in the sink.

"Bella!"

"I'm protected, okay?" She turned to face Alice.

"You better hope you are because the last thing you need is to be knocked up by someone who didn't want his first kid."

"You don't know anything," Bella snapped.

Alice's eyes widened in surprise.

"Wow." She shook her head and looked away.

"I just mean…when it comes to Carlisle and Edward things aren't as cut and dry as they appear," Bella tried to explain.

"Sure." Alice looked back at her. "Because it appears Edward hates his father."

"Okay, so some things are how they appear, but the reasons behind them are all wrong."

"What do you know that you're not telling me, Bella?" Alice asked more concerned than nosey.

"I can't say anything."

"Why not?"

"It's not my place to say."

"So, its Carlisle's secret?" Bella hesitated and then nodded. "And you're the only one who knows?"

"No, Esme knows."

"Why did he tell you?"

"Because of what Esme said." Alice raised her eyebrows and titled her head indicating she didn't understand. "When Esme and I had that talk last week and she warned me to be careful he explained why."

"But what does that have to do with Edward?" Alice questioned.

Bella groaned. "Alice, if I could tell you I would, but I can't." Bella looked at her with pleading eyes. "Please, just don't say anything to Edward or ask him anything. Or Jasper for that matter."

"Why does it matter-Oh!" Alice's eyes lit up. "Edward doesn't know about this secret and it's about him."

"Promise me you won't say anything."

"Okay." Alice lifted her left shoulder. "But secrets have a way of coming out and I have a feeling you'll be stuck in the middle of this one."

"Thanks for the warning," Bella said dryly.

"Did you check your phone?" Alice asked gleefully changing the subject.

"Yeah." Bella looked at her puzzled.

"Obviously you didn't see what I did or else you would have said something."

"What did you do?"

Alice laughed and danced out of the kitchen to go shower just as Edward and Jasper returned.

"Afternoon, Bella." Jasper grinned at her and put his bag of goodies on the table. He pulled out a new bottle of scotch and handed it to her. "For the one we drank last night."

"Thanks, Jasper." She smiled and took the bottle. "How ironic is it that my dad, the police chief, will be drinking liquor supplied by a minor," she teased.

"Edward didn't buy that."

"I know, but…." She looked from the bottle to him. "Jasper, how old are you?"

He smiled at her question. "Twenty-two."

"Oh. I thought you were the same age as Edward."

"Nope," he said making the 'p' pop.

"Does Alice know?" Why hadn't she said anything to her?

Jasper shrugged. "She's never asked. Where is she?"

"Shower," Bella answered putting the scotch in the cabinet.

Jasper wiggled his eyebrows wickedly and took off upstairs.

Bella softly laughed to herself and unpacked the rest of the bag.

"What's so funny?" Edward asked coming up behind her.

"Jasper," she said simply.

"Where is he?"

"With Alice."

"Where's Alice?"

"In the shower." Bella looked at him just in time to see him roll his eyes. "Jealous?"

"Nah." He grinned. "Now, if he was in there with you…." He let his sentence trail off.

"Never going to happen."

"With him or me?"

"Both of you."

"You also said you'd never kiss me." His grin widened. "Told you so."

"I was drunk."

"I wonder what would have happened if you didn't have that excuse to fall back on."

"Nothing."

"Don't be so sure. You definitely kissed me back this time."

"Would you have taken advantage of the situation if I hadn't passed out?"

"You knew what you were doing, Bella. I wouldn't have had to take advantage," he said smugly.

"I thought you were going to stop being a jackass," Bella snapped.

"How is telling the truth being a jackass?" he asked.

"It's your attitude," she answered.

"That was this morning. Besides," he said his eyes growing dark again, "you got what you wanted. At least one of us was left satisfied."

"That's not my problem." She took a step back.

He reached out for her just as Jasper bounded down the stairs.

"Dude, why aren't you grilling?" Jasper asked stopping short when he saw them.

"I could ask you the same question." Edward smirked.

He grinned. "I had something to take care of first." He grabbed the burgers out of the freezer and a beer out of the fridge. He tossed a can at Edward and asked, "You coming?"

"Give me a second," he told Jasper not taking his eyes off Bella. Jasper left and Edward stepped closer to her. "Just so we're clear I wouldn't have done anything to you that you wouldn't have wanted," he murmured.

"I know," she whispered.

She did know that. She knew deep down Edward was a decent guy. It was this lie that he carried around with him everyday that made him into the ass he was most days. She was afraid that it was the decent guy she caught glimpses of every now and again that would have made her want to give into her drunken desire.

Her cell phone chimed signalling a text.

McNaughty: Good time to call?

_McNaughty? _

She looked at the number and saw it was Carlisle.

_Alice!_

Bella sent a quick 'yes' and ten seconds later her phone rang. She stepped away from Edward to answer.

"Hey," she greeted.

"Hi," Carlisle said.

"Having a good first day?" She smiled at the sound of his voice.

"So far. Are you busy tonight?"

"Is it possible to be busy in Forks?" Bella laughed.

"Do you want to be?" he asked.

"What do you have in mind?"

"I'm not off for a few more hours, but if you want I was thinking you could come here tonight."

"Okay." Bella couldn't hold back the smile that broke across her face if she tried.

"Great." He told her the name of the hotel he was at and the room and phone number. "I'll call and make arrangements for them to let you in the room in case I'm late."

"See you then."

She's barely hit the end button when Edward asked, "Going somewhere?"

She jumped, startled by his noiseless approach.

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes."

"Need help getting there?" He winked.

"I know my way to Seattle, thank you."

"Seattle?"

_Crap._

"A friend is there and wants to get together while I'm still in Forks." She shrugged it off as no big deal.

"Why don't they come here?"

"Looking for fresh meat?"

"Does that bother you?"

"Trust me when I say they're not your type," Bella said.

"Who's not his type?" Alice inquired coming into the kitchen.

Edward glanced at her. "Bella's friend in Seattle."

"Oh, Edward trust her," Alice laughed. "Unless you like them tall, blonde, athletic-"

"Doesn't sound bad at all," Edward said.

"And with a penis," Alice finished. She and Bella laughed at the face Edward pulled. "I told you to trust her," Alice sang.

"So is this the boyfriend?" Edward asked.

"He's a friend," Bella corrected.

"With a penis," he remarked.

"Uh, yeah most men have them unless Loranna Bobbit's around," Bella replied.

Edward chuckled.

"It's just kind of obvious why a guy calls to see if you can meet him later if you're just friends," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"He's implying you're a booty call," Alice explained.

Bella turned to Edward.

"So what if I am? Does that offend a sensitive man like you," she mocked.

"I could find it offensive that you'll be his and not mine."

"Don't be," Alice snorted. "She wouldn't be anyone's but his."

"Alice, do you know what shut the fuck up means?" Bella asked sweetly. "Why don't you go find Jasper? I'm sure he appreciates your mouth."

Alice stuck her tongue out, but made no attempt to leave the room.

"Ah." Edward stuck his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth on his heels. "So, it is the boyfriend."

"I'm getting really tired of this song and dance with you," Bella growled.

"If you just answered my questions we could quit dancing."

"I did this morning, remember?" Bella reminded him. "And I'm telling you the truth now. He's not my boyfriend. Alice, will you tell him, please?" she asked looking at her.

"I thought you told me to shut the fuck up," Alice said. She looked at Bella and rolled her eyes. "He's not her boyfriend."

"There!" Bella turned back to Edward.

"But he's more than just a fuck buddy," Alice added. "A lot more, even if she won't admit it."

Bella shook her head and silently cursed Alice. Edward opened his mouth to say something, but Bella cut him off before he could speak.

"I'd love to play another round of twenty questions with you, but I'm going to get ready."

She escaped upstairs and shut her bedroom door behind her. In her closet she searched for something she could use as an over night bag. The only thing she found was an old backpack she'd left behind years ago.

_Way too school girl._

Thinking Esme might have something, she dashed across the hall to her parents' room and threw open the closet door. Inside tucked away in the corner was a small leather tote bag. She pulled it out and decided it would be big enough to throw a change of clothes in.

She hurried back to her room and grabbed a clean pair of jeans and sweater to pack in the tote. She was just about to throw in a pair of pj bottoms and tank when she remembered Carlisle's desire to see her in nothing but boy shorts and a tank. Smiling, she skipped over the bottoms and grabbed the shirt and panties.

She went to the bathroom to grab her toiletry bag and ran smack into Edward coming back out. She dropped the bag, spilling its contents everywhere.

"Sorry," he apologized squatting to help pick up the mess.

"It's my fault I wasn't paying attention-" She stopped short when she saw what was scattered all over the floor.

Edward held up the small square packet and grinned.

"Must have some night planned to need all these," he remarked.

Where the hell had all the condoms come from?

"They aren't mine," Bella sputtered.

Edward laughed as he gathered up the dozen foil squares.

"Bella, we're both adults. It's not like you're a teenager being caught by her parents and have to lie."

"If they were mine I'd have no problem admitting it, smartass," she snapped. "But they're not. Maybe I grabbed Alice's bag by mistake."

_Alice!_

That sneaky little pixie had to have done this after their conversation this morning.

"If you say so." Edward chuckled handing her the bag, obviously not buying a word she said.

"Thank you." Bella snatched the bag away.

"Is it yours?" He flashed his crooked grin.

Bella huffed and stomped back to her room.

"It'll take that as a yes!" Edward called to her as she shut the door in his laughing face.

She finished packing, grabbed her jacket and bag and went downstairs. She threw her stuff on the couch and glared at Alice who sat next to Jasper stealing his fries.

"I found your gifts."

Alice smiled. "You're welcome."

"I don't think I said thank you."

"Well, that just makes you rude then. It's better to be safe than sorry, Bella."

Bella rolled her eyes and walked away.

"There's burgers if you're hungry, Bella," Jasper told her.

"Thanks, but I'm good."

"She has a different kind of meat in mind," Alice laughed.

"Alice, why don't you keep your gutter thoughts to yourself," Bella commented grabbing her things from the couch. "And while you're at it, keep your hands off my phone."

"Oh, c'mon. You don't like it?" Alice giggled. "I had to stick to the theme or else I would have put something else."

"What theme?"

"You know, McDreamy, McSteamy….all those other hot doctors."

"Other hot doctors?" Jasper asked looking at Alice to Bella.

"And you came up with McNaughty?" Bella asked ignoring Jasper.

"Girl, from what I've overheard he sounds naughty to me!"

"What other hot doctors?" Jasper asked again.

Bella rolled her eyes.

"Try not to wreck the place while I'm gone, Alice."

"You're leaving already?"

"It's a long drive."

"Uh huh."

"Excuse me?" Jasper cried waving his hand in front of Alice's face for attention. "Are you two dating doctors?"

"See you later," Bella laughed.

"Be safe!" Alice yelled after her.

Bella slid behind the wheel, tossed her bag in the back and the cell in the cup holder next to her. Her stomach rolled with excitement as she started the car at the thought of seeing Carlisle.

She sped out of Forks as fast as she could without drawing unwanted attention, eager to get where she was going as fast as she could. She had to stop for gas half way and as she waited for the tank to fill her cell chimed again.

McNaughty: Can't wait to see you.

Bella smiled and made a mental note to change his screen name.

Bella: I'm half way.

McNaughty: Do you think it would make me a bad employee to cut out early on my first day?

Bella: Yes, but I like it when you're bad.

McNaughty: I'm leaving now LOL

She laughed and sped away from the gas station. The traffic got heavier the closer she got to the city and what seemed like eons later she finally arrived. She'd only been to Seattle a handful of times so finding the hotel was a little harder than she imagined. She drove slowly through the city streets, pissing off the regular city drivers if their horns were any indication of how they were feeling.

Finally, after several wrong turns and almost an hour later, she saw the hotel and breathed a sigh of relief. She glanced at the clock and was shocked to see it was so late.

Had it really taken her five hours?

"Fuck," she muttered.

She picked up her cell and bag and got out of the car. She looked around the parking lot, but it was full of sleek expensive cars and she wouldn't have been able to pick out Carlisle's if her life had depended on it.

A woman in her early thirties greeted her at the front desk. She looked Bella up and down and Bella could have sworn she saw her cringe at her appearance. Apparently, comfy jeans and old sweaters were not approved.

"Hi. I'm Bella Swan-"

"Do you have a reservation?" The woman asked with a small tight smile.

"No. There was supposed to be arrangements made for me to have access to a guest's room."

"Which room?" she asked suspiciously.

"Carlisle Cullen's." Bella smiled.

"Dr. Cullen's?" The woman's eyes roamed over her once more in surprise.

"Yes."

"Are you a patient?"

"Do you know many doctors that meet patients at their hotel?" Bella asked, amused.

"No."

"Then I guess I'm not a patient."

"Family member?"

"No."

"Well, I'm sorry, but I don't see a note of such arrangements," she said not bothering to look.

_Bitch. _

"Can you call his room then?" Bella asked starting to get annoyed.

"Dr. Cullen hasn't arrived yet. You're more than welcome to wait in the lobby."

"I have a better idea," Bella said setting her bag on the counter and taking out her phone. "How about I call him and let him know I'm having problems with the front desk."

"I don't think that's necessary," the woman said eyeing the phone.

"No, that way you can speak to him directly and follow his requests," Bella insisted starting to dial.

"Miss.-"

"Isabella."

Bella turned and saw Carlisle hurrying towards her. He leaned down and softly kissed her cheek, smiling.

"Have you been waiting long?"

"No." She returned his smile. "I couldn't get to your room though." She glanced back at the evil counter woman. "There seems to be some kind of miscommunication."

"Oh?"

Bella turned back to him and saw he hadn't taken his eyes off her.

"Guess it's a good thing I showed up when I did." He grabbed her bag off the counter and peered at the receptionist. "Is there a problem with Miss. Swan being my guest for the evening?"

"Not at all, Dr. Cullen." The territorial wench flashed him a smile. "I'll make a note of it."

"Thank you." He placed his hand on Bella's back, his fingers brushing her bottom, and led her towards the elevators.

Bella softly chuckled as the doors closed and she saw the woman was still watching them.

"What?" Carlisle smiled at her.

"I think you have a fan," Bella said nodding at the closed doors.

"A fan?"

"The woman at the desk." Bella was surprised he hadn't noticed. As bitchy as she was, the woman was very pretty. "I think if you asked her she'd tattoo your name on her ass."

Carlisle laughed and pulled her into his arms.

"Are you jealous?" He ran his hands down her back to her ass and squeezed, pulling her closer to him so she'd feel his arousal.

Was she jealous? That always seemed like such an immature emotion to her.

Not that she could actually think with him throbbing against her like he was.

"How would you feel if you noticed someone was interested in me?" she asked instead.

"Crazy jealous," he answered not missing a beat.

He kissed her then, branding her with his mouth. He lifted her and she wrapped her legs around his waist pressing him into her center. He pushed her against the elevator wall just as the doors slid open.

He groaned and slowly lowered her down his body setting her on her feet.

"We could always push the stop button," Bella suggested winking.

Carlisle shook his head laughed. "You're a bad influence, my dear." He took her hand and tugged her behind him as she laughed.

They walked half way down the hall and he turned his back to her to open the door. She took advantage of the situation and stood behind him, slipping her hands into the front pockets of his slacks and teasing him through the material.

He cursed and thrust his hips forward, needing more than the restricted space provided her to give him.

She stood on her toes so her mouth reached his ear and whispered, "Open the door now, Carlisle. I need you inside me."

She heard the click of the door unlocking and before she had a chance to blink he pulled her into the room and pushed her back against the door.

He nuzzled her neck, nipping the sensitive skin below her ear. His hands covered her breasts, kneading them over her shirt. She moaned and arched into his touch.

"Tell me again," he whispered thickly as his hands wandered to the button on her jeans.

His mouth trailed hot kisses over her jaw line to her lips. He sucked her bottom lip into his mouth, gently biting and pulling on it. Their eyes locked and she ran her tongue over her swollen lip once he released it from his teeth.

"I need you inside me," she told him again.

He unsnapped the button and slowly pulled the zipper down.

"How bad?" he asked.

"So bad," she gasped as his fingers brushed her stomach.

"As bad as this?" He placed her hand on his raging hard-on. "As bad as I want you?"

"Find out for yourself," she challenged wigging her hips invitingly as she stroked him.

He dipped his hand into the opening of her jeans and cupped her sex through her panties. Her breath hissed out of her as he rubbed his hand back and forth.

"You're so fucking wet," he murmured.

She shivered at his words. It was so hot when he let go and said things like that.

"For you," she panted. "I'm wet for you."

He pushed his finger inside her and groaned. Her muscles clamped around him and she rocked her hips.

"More," she moaned.

He slid another finger passed her panties and into her drenched folds.

"Ooooh!" she sighed. "Please, Carlisle…."

"Tell me what you want," he breathed into her ear. "Tell me exactly what you want, Isabella."

"I want you to fuck me." The words were out of her mouth before she could rethink them and she immediately blushed for being so brass.

Carlisle groaned and thrust his fingers into her harder. Bella cried out and grabbed his shirt, balling her hands into fists. His mouth found hers again as he slipped his hand from her pants and pushed the heavy material down her thighs. Bella used her feet to tug the jeans the rest of the way off, never breaking their kiss.

He slipped his hands into her underwear to grab her ass, clutching the soft globs of flesh.

Bella released his shirt to help move her panties out of the way. They slid down her legs and she kicked them off with her pants.

Carlisle picked her up, still kissing her. His restrained cock throbbed against her core and she squirmed against him. He set her down a few feet away from the door on a waist high dresser. Bella shivered as the coolness of the dresser top met her hot heat.

She unbuttoned his shirt wanting to feel his hard chest beneath her hands. Carlisle made quick work of his slacks as she explored his stomach with her fingertips. She wrapped her hand around his shaft as soon as he'd exposed himself.

"Isabella," he sighed, thrusting into her hand. He pulled her forward until she was sitting on the edge of the dresser and the head of his cock pulsed against her opening. He looked deep into her eyes and she saw the desire burning there.

She leaned in to softly kiss him, whispering against his lips, "Do it now, Carlisle. I can't wait anymore. Fuck me now."

Carlisle roughly brushed her hands off his cock and thrust inside her.

"Fuck!" he grunted as he buried himself all the way in.

"Again!" Bella gasped. "God Carlisle, do it again!"

He pulled all the way out and slammed back into her.

"Yes! Yes!"

She wrapped her legs around him, locking them behind his back. The action caused him to sink even deeper inside her.

"Isabella," he groaned not moving, just feeling the tight warmth of her surrounding him.

He leaned his forehead against hers, their breath washing over each other, and then slowly he began to move again. His cock slid in and out of her, glistening from her juices.

Carlisle hooked his hands behind her knees and lifted them, slightly angling her. Bella rested her hands behind her on the cool surface to take some of the pressure off her tailbone. His hips pounded into her now, thrusting harder.

"I. Want. To. Hear. You," Carlisle grunted with each thrust. "Talk to me, Isabella. It's so sexy when you talk to me."

"Carlisle…I can't…think…" Bella panted between broken breathes. "You feel so good. So…. Oh, yes! Please, don't stop!"

He changed his pace from long slow thrusts to small quick jerks.

"Ohmygod! Fuck me like that! Just like that!" Bella cried throwing her head back.

His speed increased until he was slamming into her, chanting her name over and over again. Shudder after shudder wracked her body as her walls grasped Carlisle's repeatedly.

His mouth claimed her mouth as he tumbled over the edge with her, groaning his release against her lips.

Once their breathing had slowed, he wrapped his arms around her and gently lifted her off the dresser. Bella threw her arms around his neck as he carried her over to the bed and laid her down.

He peeled his own shirt off before lifting Bella's over her head. He placed soft kisses along her collar bone and over the swell of her breasts as he unhooked her bra taking it off and tossing it to the side.

He pulled the covers over them before snuggling Bella as close to him as possible. She laid her head in the crook of his neck and pressed her body firmly again his. Tiny goose bumps rose on her arm as he softly ran his fingers up and down it.

"I don't want you to think sex is the only reason I asked you here tonight," he said breaking the silence.

"I know."

"It's like your body calls to me all the time," he murmured.

"Do you hear me complaining?" She grinned.

"No, but I don't want you to feel used. I don't want you to think that I think of you as my play thing."

"What if I like being your play thing," she teased.

"What if I want you to be more?" he asked softly.

Bella was sure her heart stopped. She definitely forgot how to breathe.

_Did he mean…? Was he…?_

He couldn't possibly mean what it sounded like he meant.

Could he?

Her lungs burned, screaming for oxygen.

_Breathe, Bella._

She exhaled, the air whooshing out of her and then inhaled deeply again.

"Isabella?"

_Don't hyperventilate. Don't hyperventilate. Don't hyperventilate. _

"Um." He voice cracked. She cleared her throat and tried again. "What do you mean by 'more'?"

"Well…" He stopped and sighed heavily. "I want to be with you, to continue this and see where it goes, but-"

_No, not a 'but'. Buts were never good!_

"-I don't know how that would work once you're back in Phoenix." He continued to caress her arm. "This might be the last chance we get to see each other before you leave."

Bella didn't trust her voice not to break, so she remained silent listening to the steady rhythm of his heart.

"I asked you here because I missed you," he confessed. "It hasn't even been forty-eight hours and I miss you. It just doesn't make any sense," he muttered more to himself than her.

"The way you left…the way you said good-bye was…" She searched for the right word.

"Cowardly?"

"Incomprehensible," she said. "You said you were grateful." Bella made a face and he laughed.

"It may not have been the best choice of words, but I am grateful. Everything that I told you about my life and Edward I've never told another person. I wouldn't trust anyone else with it, but I trust you and for the first time in a long time I feel like I have someone I can fully share myself with."

Tears stung her eyes.

"Thank you. That really does make me incredibly happy to know," she told him.

"But if I wasn't such a chicken shit I would have told you I was more than just grateful." He dipped his head so he could look at her. "I would have told you how I really feel."

"How do you really feel?" she asked in no more than a whisper holding her breath again.

"Like the luckiest man alive to be with you. To know you." He trailed his fingertip down her cheek. "Like the way you blush over the littlest things. It's just an innocent thing when we both know innocent isn't the word I'd use to describe you," he teased.

"Oh really?" She grinned at his banter. "And what word would you use, Dr. Cullen?"

He groaned and swiftly moved so she was beneath him. Bella spread her legs so he fit nicely between them, his sex pressed against hers. Carlisle held himself up by his arms and smiled down at her.

"Wicked. Alluring. Sexy. Daring. Beautiful." Bella moved her hips. "Tease!" he moaned.

"That's more than one word," Bella laughed.

"Hmm, you're right." He kissed her softly and said, "Perfect."

Before Bella could say anything her stomach growled, ruining the moment.

"Or hungry," Carlisle laughed at her attempt to hide her face. "We can go out or order room service."

"I'd rather just stay in and be with you," Bella said. "Unless you want to go out."

"Keeping you in here naked sounds better to me." He grinned.

Bella laughed and scooted out from under him. She grabbed his discarded shirt off the floor and put it on. She swam in it of course, the hem hung down to her knees and she had to roll up the sleeves, but it was his.

Carlisle made a noise from the bed and she turned to find him watching her.

"Did you say something?" she asked.

"Maybe. I don't remember. I lost all train of thought when I saw you in my shirt." His eyes roamed over her. "You're so sexy, Isabella."

He'd sat up and was leaning against the head board; the sheet barely covered his growing erection. Bella crawled back onto the bed and straddled his lap. His cock slid between her folds, straining against her.

"I think you were going to order food," she said.

"Mmmhmm." His arms encircled her waist and he shifted his hips just right so he made direct contact with her clit making Bella gasp. "Right. Food. Guess I should do that," he muttered into her ear.

"I think you should continue what you're doing. Unless you're that hungry," she giggled.

"My hunger has nothing to do with food."

Bella leaned forward so she could press her lips to his chest, but his sudden intake of breath stopped her.

"What's wrong?" she asked concerned.

"Nothing at all." His voice was thick with lust when he asked, "Isabella, will you turn around for me?"

"Turn around?"

"Face away from me."

"Um, okay," she said still confused.

She carefully rearranged herself so her back was to his chest. She no longer sat directly on his lap, more like between his legs, his cock brushing her back.

"Now look up."

And then she saw what he did. Their reflections stared back at them through the mirror above the dresser.

"I want to watch us," Carlisle whispered. "I want _you _to watch us," he added moving her hair out of the way so he could kiss the back of her neck.

Bella had never been as turned on as she was in that moment watching Carlisle kiss her. His hands moved up her body, cupping her now aching breasts through his shirt. He looked up at the mirror and watched as he unbuttoned each button slowly. Bella was spellbound by his fingers, unable to take her eyes off the mirror. Slowly, he peeled the shirt down her arms, exposing the tops of her breasts.

Bella shivered and leaned back so she could reach his ear. Her tongue flicked the lobe causing him to moan and pull the shirt the rest off the way off her. She watched as he pinched her nipples. Bella moaned and curved into him as his hand trailed down her body to her spread legs. She groaned at the sight and feel of him playing in her wetness.

"You're so beautiful, Isabella," he told her.

She whimpered when he inserted just the tip of his finger inside her.

"Sit on your ass and put both of your legs on the outside of my legs," he instructed.

Bella did as he asked and when she glanced up at the mirror again she felt short of breath. The new position spread her legs out in front of them. She could see the most intimate details of herself reflecting back at her. This meant so could he. A flush spread over her body at the thought.

"Watch, baby," Carlisle said.

He took her hand in his and together he brought them to her center. The sight of both their fingers entering her had Bella moaning. Carlisle sucked and nipped at her neck and shoulders, his eyes never leaving the mirror. He thrust their joined fingers in and out of her slowly until Bella couldn't take anymore.

"Carlisle," she breathed, "I want to see you inside me."

"Sit up."

Bella got back on her knees and he slid under her. His cock brushed her and he grasped it around the base as she slowly impaled herself over him, making them both moan.

She watched as she rode him. His thick cock gliding in and out of her, stretching her open. He gripped her hips, helping her to move up and down on him faster. Her breasts swayed with each thrust, her nipples hard little buds.

"Faster, Isabella," he told her.

Bella ground down on his cock and rocked her hips back and forth. His grip on her tightened as her speed increased.

"Fuck!" he cried.

"Yes! Carlisle, I'm going to come!"

"Yes," he hissed. "Come around my cock."

Their eyes locked in the mirror as Bella swivelled her hips once…twice…and then exploded just as she felt him spill inside her. Her limbs felt like wet noodles has he pulled her off him and wrapped his arms around her once again.

"Now I need food," he teased.

Bella's laugh was music to his ears.

**C/N- So, now Eddie and Bella sexin'. Yes, I know there is diappointment. But oh! to be taken by a sexy older man on a dresser or table or anything like that! *sigh* I think this time is my favorite so far.**

**I've been asked so many times and I figure now is as good a time as any time come right out and say it. This will not end as an E/B HEA. Sorry, just not going to happen. Now does that mean there won't be any B/E sex? I never said that....**

**I won't give anything away, but will say things with our hunky doc and his Isabella do get rocky from here. The next chapters are not going to be very pretty. But have faith. I do believe in the end they will find each other again. **

**I hope all of you who were rooting for Edward and Bella's HEA will continue reading and following this journey with me. Edward may not get the girl, but he causes a lot of trouble along the way...**

**One more thing. If you're on Twilighted check out My Family and I by RedSummer. It is an amazing story of Carlisle and Esme's very different journey. **

**Now review! **


	14. Secrets Exposed

**Wow, we've hit over 300 reviews. That's so awesome! So I lost some readers because of the last chapter by deciding to make it B/C. I am sorry that they won't be continuing this journey with us, but I don't regret my decision at all. And for those of you who are sticking with this story I love you all!**

**At the risk of sounding like a broken record for the 14th time, SM owns all things Twilight. However, the original AU fic you love so much is all from my naughty little mind. **

Bella eyed Carlisle over her chow mien noodles. They'd decided to order Chinese after nothing on the hotel menu appealed to either of them. She was wearing his shirt again and he sat across from her wearing only lounge pants.

Was there anything this man didn't look good in?

"I see you ogling me, Isabella," he teased.

Bella blushed at being caught.

"Actually, I was ogling the noodle stuck to your chin," she lied.

Carlisle swiped the nonexistent noodle off his chin and Bella laughed. He grinned and flung a noodle at her.

"Hey!" she cried when it landed on her leg. "Do you really want to start a food fight? 'Cause I'd win."

Carlisle laughed and plucked it off her, throwing it away.

"Are you scared of losing to a girl, Carlisle?" she teased.

"Nope, just don't want to ruin my shirt. Get naked and I'll smother you in food." He winked.

Bella laughed again, shaking her head.

"McNaughty might just suit you," she remarked.

"Excuse me?" His forehead wrinkled in confusion.

"Alice," Bella said as if that explained everything.

"Alice?"

"Yeah. She programmed your name in my phone as McNaughty. She thinks it suits you," Bella said slightly embarrassed.

"McNaughty?" He looked amused.

"Yeah, like McSteamy and McDreamy," she mumbled.

"Are these people I should know?"

Bella laughed. "Clearly someone doesn't watch _Grey's Anatomy_."

"No, but I've heard of it. I'm just too busy _being_ a doctor to pay attention to those playing doctors," he said.

"I guess real doctors must find those shows comical," she commented.

He shrugged. "Some like them."

"What do you like to watch?"

"ESPN." He grinned

"Besides the man channel." Bella rolled her eyes.

He laughed. "I'm not much of a T.V. guy."

"Movies?"

"I'll watch anything with a captivating story line as long as it's not horror." He looked at her smiling softly. "Tell me about you, Isabella."

"What do you want to know?"

"Oh the usual….favorite food, color, sexual position." He grinned as he repeated her questions from the wedding.

"My mom is a great cook, so anything she makes I'll devour. You may notice I wear darker colors. I'm so not a pastel kind of girl."

"I've noticed," he chuckled and then grew serious. "How many men have you been with?"

_Okay, not expecting that. _

"Including you?" He nodded. "Two." He stared at her, his face unreadable. "I was with James for five years, remember? After we broke up I wasn't with anyone else until you," she said feeling the need to explain.

"Why are you blushing?" he asked softly.

Bella touched her face and felt the warmth from her cheeks.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Isabella."

"I'm not ashamed."

"But?" he said sensing there was indeed a 'but'.

"Maybe you think of me as inexperienced now." She ducked her head to avoid looking at him.

"You committed yourself to a long term relationship," he said. "That gives you more experience than sleeping around."

"What's your number?" she curiously asked.

"Ten. Including you," he added.

_Ten? Only ten?_

She'd expected a much higher number considering what Esme said about him not limiting himself.

"I can see you're not surprised at all," he teased.

"Sorry. I was just thinking of something Esme said."

"What did she say?"

"That you didn't limit yourself with women." She shrugged. "I just assumed it would be higher."

He contemplated what she said before answering, "I've been busy building a career and raising a child for the past twenty years," he said watching her. "I've dated many women as Edward got older, but that doesn't mean I've been sexual with them all."

"But the ones you have been sexual with, you've always been…safe with, right?" This may be a conversation they should have had two weeks ago.

"Yes. Every single time." He suddenly caught on to what she was getting at and nodded. "We haven't exactly been careful."

"Thank God for the pill, right?" Bella said shifting her eyes away.

"I've been with women who've been on some form of birth control and have still always used my own protection," he said.

She looked at him then.

"If it makes you feel any better I've been on it since I was sixteen and haven't had any problems or pregnancy scares."

"I wasn't worried," he said. "I mean," he quickly backtracked at her surprised look, "it's not something we want to happen, but I'm not worried about it like I normally am."

_What the hell did that mean?_

"I'm just trying to say that I'm always about safety ever since Edward, so you don't have to worry." He shifted uncomfortably. "That's all I meant."

_Um…_ "Okay."

They both remained silent as they poked at their food, avoiding the one question that was now out there: what if it did happen?

She didn't want to know what his answer would be anymore than she wanted to think about her answer. She hadn't even thought about it until he brought it up. The chances were slim and it had never concerned her before.

The fact that he _wasn't _worried it could happen worried _her_.

_Ugh!_

"I'm sorry," he said breaking through her thoughts. "The way I said that made it sound like I don't care if it happens."

She nodded. "A little bit."

"I assure you that's not what I meant to say. Being a doctor I know the stats. I know no birth control is a hundred percent effective. But if you say you've never had problems I feel comfortable in what we're doing. However," he added before she could voice her opinion, "maybe we should be a little more careful from now on. Better safe than sorry, right?"

Bella couldn't help it and laughed.

"You sound like Alice. She gave me a very similar speech right before I left."

"Well, at least someone is thinking clearly." He smiled.

"Yeah, good ole Alice," Bella muttered pushing her food away.

"I'm sure she means well."

"She always does."

"Are you sure you two will be able to live together without killing one another?" he teasingly asked.

Bella laughed. "I guess we'll soon find out."

Carlisle cleared the bed of their food and stretched out next to her.

"Tell me what you want for your future, Isabella." She looked down at him thinking what she really wanted she might not have. "Do you want to travel? Continue with school or work towards a career? Get married and have a family?" he asked when she didn't answer.

"You don't need to be married to have a family," she said. "I was never that girl who grew up dreaming of her wedding day," she told him. "Even when I was with James for so long I never really thought about it. I don't gush over babies or coo over cute little baby clothes. Sure, kids are cute, but they're a lot of work and I'm not sure I ever want that kind of responsibility. I honestly feel like I wouldn't be missing out if I never experience marriage and motherhood," she confessed.

"You're still young, you could change your mind," Carlisle said.

Bella shrugged. "Maybe, but I've always kind of felt this way."

"What _do _you want then?"

"I really don't know." She frowned.

"What?" he asked softly.

"Compared to Alice I just feel so lost. She has her entire life pretty much planned. She wants to work in Phoenix only long enough to save and then take off for New York so she can get her foot in the door in fashion. She knows what she wants and I know she's going to go after it," Bella said sadly.

"And you feel left behind," Carlisle said.

"Sometimes." She nodded.

"It's not a bad thing to be undecided, Isabella. No one said you have to know right now what you want. Some people just need more time than others finding their true passion."

"I guess."

"And even those who do know what they want can be derailed and set back," he said speaking from experience.

"What about you?" she asked.

"What about me?" Carlisle asked, confused.

"Do you want anything more than you already have?"

"As in a family?"

"Well, you have a family. You have Edward and Esme, the only thing missing is-"

"A wife?" he asked, amused. Bella shrugged. "I'm not sure how I feel about marriage. For myself anyway," he added. "I don't think marriage is a bad thing at all, but I'm not sure it's for me. Maybe it's too late now."

"You're not old, Carlisle!" Bella cried. "Some couples don't start their life together until they're forty."

Carlisle laughed. "Maybe you just tell yourself that so you don't feel like a dirty perv is taking advantage of you."

Bella giggled. "Maybe I like the dirty perv taking advantage of me."

He grabbed her and pulled her down next to him. He nuzzled her neck and dragged his finger over her hip in a small circular pattern.

"Are you ever going to tell Edward the truth?" she asked.

She felt him flinch and cursed herself for the bad timing.

"Why are you asking that now?"

"I just…" She stopped talking, wishing she could take back the question. It had been such a perfect evening and she didn't want to ruin it by talking about Edward.

"You just what?" Carlisle coaxed.

"Edward told me what you told him about his mother leaving," Bella confessed. "He thinks she was a victim and that it's your entire fault."

"I know."

"Anyone can see you love him and want a relationship with him, but I think in order for that to happen you need to tell him the truth."

Carlisle groaned and rolled onto his back, running his hands over the stubble that had grown in over the day.

"Isabella, I know the only way to fix this is to tell him, but I don't know how. That's undoing twenty years of lies and even though he's a grown man, it would still hurt him to know the truth about his mother."

"Maybe it would do him some good," Bella said a little harsher than she intended. "I'm only saying this because I think after everything you've told me we can be honest with each other, okay?" He nodded. "Edward's an ass."

Bella wasn't sure what she expected his reaction to be, but laughing wasn't it.

"What?" She smiled at him.

"One of the things I love about you is you don't sugar coat things," he said.

_Whoa! Back up. Did he just say love?_

_Not that kind of love, Bella._

_But he said 'one of the things I love about you'…_

_It's a figure of speech. Relax._

_He said love!_

_Okay, close your mouth and stop starting at him like a moron. _

Bella averted her eyes and snapped her mouth shut at the same time.

"Isabella, did I say something wrong?" he asked touching her arm.

She looked at his hand on her skin and shook her head.

"No. It's just… Nothing," she mumbled.

"Tell me," he encouraged.

She shook her head feeling incredibly stupid and disappointed. He didn't even realize what he had said.

_Figure of speech, Bella. That's all._

She looked down at the man looking up at her and almost burst into tears. It hit her that this was probably it. This night was the end of their secret rendezvous'. She was leaving in a few days and he had a new life here in Seattle. Her heart wouldn't be as whole as it had been when she arrived in Forks a little over a week ago.

How had that happened? How had she grown to love this man is such a short time? Was it even real? Were her senses deluded because of the fantastic sex? Was it because he was the first man to make her feel alive since James?

This empty ache she felt expanding in her chest was worse than it had been when she'd broken up with James. He had broke her heart, but this time she broke her own by falling for a man she'd never fully be able to have.

What was wrong with her?

"Isabella, will you please talk to me?" Carlisle pleaded beside her.

She couldn't talk to him. She didn't trust herself not to blurt out how she really felt about him.

So she kissed him. She closed her eyes to hold back her tears and wrapped her arms around his neck to encourage a response from him.

He kissed her back with the same eagerness she kissed him. He gently laid her on her back and broke the kiss to look down at her. His eyes shone with both confusion and understanding as he brushed her hair off her face.

"Isabella, I-"

"Make love to me, Carlisle," she whispered. She couldn't hear it. Either way it would be too hard. "Please."

He looked like he was in conflict with himself as he stared at her; debating if he should say what he was about to tell her. And then, he slowly stripped her of his shirt without saying another word. She pushed his pants off his hips and he kicked them off the rest of the way.

He kissed her lips, over her jaw to her ear, whispering her name over and over again. He nuzzled her neck, kissed her shoulders, brushed his lips over her breasts and swept his tongue over her nipples.

Bella dragged her nails down his back. His breathing hitched and without making a sound, she knew he liked the feel of her nails lightly scratching him. She opened her legs to him, offering herself to him in a way she never had before. And when he entered her it was slow, but not to tease her, only to prolong the moment of feeling her around him once again.

They made love slowly, gently and silently. The urgency that usually overcame them was gone. She closed her eyes and arched her hips, begging him to move.

"Look at me, Isabella," he whispered.

She hesitated and then opened her eyes and locked them with his. Only then did he begin to move. He rocked his hips against hers, plunging deep inside her only to gradually pull out and do it again. He kissed her as he rotated his hips, making her cry out into his mouth. She dug her nails into his shoulders as he did it again.

Bella placed her feet flat on the bed and keeping her legs as close to him as possible, she raised her hips to meet his thrusts. He sank even deeper inside her, causing them both to gasp. Never did he give into the frantic pace that always overtook them, both wanting to make the moment last as long as possible.

With whispered words and tender kisses they came together, exploding around each other. Their bodies shuddered from their climaxes against each other.

Bella wrapped her arms around him to keep him from moving off her. Sensing she wanted the closeness, but not wanting to crush her beneath his weight, he shifted so he lay on his side, tucking her under him.

"I'm not moving from this spot for the rest of the night," she sighed.

She felt him smile against her temple before kissing the spot.

"You'll hear no complaints if you want to turn it into more than just tonight," he whispered.

"Okay. Let me just call Alice and tell her I'll never be coming home," Bella joked.

Carlisle remained silent at the comment.

_Great._

"Hey." She poked him gently in the ribs. "Don't worry I'm only kidding."

"I know," he said a hint of frustration in his voice. "But I wasn't."

****************

Bella shivered from the loss of warmth from Carlisle's body as he left the bed early the next morning.

She heard the shower turn on and briefly considered joining him in there, but a quick glance at the clock made her rethink her decision and stay in bed. The only possible reason he could have for being up this early was the hospital.

She stretched beneath the comforter, feeling the pleasurable ache from last night's activities in her muscles. She sighed and buried her face against Carlisle's pillow, inhaling his scent.

She lay like that for a few minutes, eyes closed, listening to the sound of the water running. When the shower shut off, she opened her eyes and watched the bathroom door.

What did he look like fresh out of the shower in the morning?

She heard him moving around and…

_Humming?_

Was Carlisle humming?

Bella sat up and practically held her breath to hear better. There was definitely a low murmur of a melody coming from the bathroom.

She clapped her hand over the mouth to stifle the giggle that wanted to burst forth. She so hadn't pictured Carlisle the kind of person to sing, or in this case hum, in the shower.

She listened carefully, trying to figure out the tune. What music did Dr. Cullen find relaxing? Bella bit her lip and titled her head to the side. It sounded so familiar. She repeated the rhythm over in her head.

_What was it?_

Bella continued to listen to Carlisle and had just figured it out when he opened the door and stepped out. He looked at her, surprised to see her awake.

"Did I wake you?"

"Are you humming…_Uncle Kracker_?" She grinned at the slight pink coloring his checks.

"Was it my humming that woke you?" he asked avoiding the question.

"No. I woke up when you left the bed. You like Uncle Kracker?" she asked again.

He'd never looked sexier to Bella than in that moment standing there in only a towel wrapped low on his hips and blushing.

She wasn't sure if he was embarrassed by his music choices or his shower activities.

"I was thinking of you and it just popped into my head," he told her.

"'_Smile_' made you think of me?" she asked playing the lyrics over in her head.

"Is that immature?" He smiled sheepishly.

"No!" she quickly reassured him. "I love that song."

His eyes darted to the alarm clock beside Bella and he sighed heavily.

"I wish I didn't have to go in so early," he said. He looked back at her and smiled mischievously. "There are a few things I'd love to do more."

Bella laughed as he walked towards her. There was nothing more she wanted than to feel his lips on her, but the fear of morning breath had her shrugging into his shirt from last night and scrambling out of bed.

Carlisle looked at her, confused as to why she was trying to make a quick exit. She ran her hands over his stomach and kissed his shoulder softly, whispering, "I'll be right back."

Bella grabbed her overnight bag, flashed him a smile and disappeared into the bathroom. She showered in record time, not wanting to mess around too long and miss out on the little time they had before he left. After brushing her teeth and combing the tangles out of her wet hair, she pulled on a tank top and boy shorts, grinning. She exited the bathroom, dropping her bag on the dresser.

"Would you like some coffee?" Carlisle asked with his back to her. He'd changed into jeans, but was still shirtless.

"Please." She watched him pour the coffee pouch into the filter and turn on the machine. "What time do you have to be at the hospital?"

"Little over an hour," he said. "I have an early surgery and need to go over a few things. Are you hungry? I have some-" He turned to look at her and let his sentence trail off. His eyes roamed over her body and she saw him swallow as he drank her in. "Isabella," he groaned, "did you have to wear that this morning?"

"What?" She looked down at herself innocently. "Would you prefer I wore nothing at all?"

"Come here," he demanded his voice thick with desire.

Bella bit her lip to try and hold back the grin that wanted to spread across her face. She slowly walked to him, stopping just within his reach.

He reached forward and pulled her to him, causing her to fall against his chest. His hands immediately dropped to her bottom, kneading her flesh.

"I don't think that's going to get you to work on time," she murmured.

"You shouldn't have come out dressed like that then."

He spun her around so her back was to his chest, the hard bulge beneath his jeans throbbing on her ass. He slid his hands under her tank and cupped her bare breasts. She moaned and ground her backside against him. Cupping her aching mounds with one hand, he dragged the other down her smooth stomach and slipped it inside her underwear, playing in her wet folds.

Bella instinctively arched at his touch, causing his finger to slide into her.

"Fuck," Carlisle swore into her ear. "Your body is always so ready for me, Isabella."

"Because I can't get enough of you," she breathed. "It seems like your body is always ready for me, too." She rocked her ass against his straining cock again.

"Because I can't get enough of you," he mimicked.

"Show me."

Carlisle groaned and grabbed her hips, walking her to the bed. He pulled her panties down and moved her forward until she was kneeling on the mattress. Gently he pushed on her back until she was on all fours.

"Jesus Christ, Isabella," he moaned as he unzipped his jeans. She heard them fall to the floor and he stepped up behind her. He placed his hand on the small of her back and traced it over the curve of her ass, giving a playful squeeze.

"Carlisle," she sighed looking back at him.

He locked eyes with her and thrust a finger inside her warm center. Bella dropped her head and moaned. He pulled it out only to thrust two fingers back in.

"Please, Carlisle," she begged.

"Christ I love it when you ask me like that," he groaned.

"Please, Carlisle," she begged again. "I want you inside me."

Bella felt the head of his shaft against her entrance. Grabbing her hips he thrust deep inside her.

"Yes!"

He pulled out and did it again, harder this time.

"Fuck! Carlisle, don't stop!" Bella panted.

"Isabella!" he grunted with his thrusts.

He slammed into her over and over again. Her pebbled nipples brushed against her shirt with each thrust, sending ripples of pleasure through her breasts.

"Carlisle, I'm so close," she told him. "Oh…my… Ahh!"

"Come for me," he panted. "Now, Isabella. Come for me now!"

He increased his pace, pounding into her harder than ever before. Bella screamed as her orgasm ripped through her. Carlisle groaned and thrust one last time, burying himself as deep as possible inside her warmth as he came.

He leaned over her, so his chest was touching her back again and softly chucked. "If only I could be sent off to work like that every day."

He gently kissed her and stood up. After cleaning up, Bella drank her coffee and watched him finish getting ready for work.

"You're welcome to stay longer," he told her pouring coffee into his travel mug. "Just because I have to go doesn't mean you have to."

"I know." Bella shrugged. "Might as well get an early start out though."

"I didn't just mean today," he said softly looking at her.

Bella swallowed.

What did she say to that?

That was the second time he'd told her - practically asked her - to stay with him longer. And she had no idea what to say to him.

Carlisle shifted his eyes back to his cup and snapped the lid on.

_God damn it, say something._

"Have you ever been to Phoenix?" she asked blurting the first thing that came to her.

He peeked at her from the corner of his eye and shook his head.

"No."

"It's nice. If you ever have time to get away you should come."

There. Now he had an open invitation too.

"And what if I don't have the time for a few months?" He looked at her again. "Will that offer still be available?"

Bella's stomach fluttered and her heart jumped in her chest at the question. It sounded like he was worried this wouldn't last that long. Did that mean he was thinking long term? Did he really want to be with her after they both went back to their normal lives?

Bella nodded and answered his question, "For as long as you want."

Carlisle smiled and leaned down so their lips were almost touching and said, "You may have just locked yourself in for a life time, Isabella Swan."

***********

The smile never left Bella's face as she drove back to Forks.

_Locked in for a lifetime?_

Yeah, she liked the sound of that more than she probably should.

The thought of not seeing him for months took a little of the giddiness away, though. She missed him when he was gone for a day. How would it feel to be away from him for months? Could they make a relationship work being so far from each other for so long?

Would he want to continue meeting in secret or would they come out and tell everyone? What would Edward say? And her mom? She hadn't even given any thought to how Rene would react to her dating a man her age.

Her mom had always been the type to go with the flow while raising Bella. She trusted her daughter's judgements and decisions on how to live her life. She'd supported her relationship with James until the very end. She'd listened to Bella cry and vent about the man who'd broke her heart, not once saying anything negative. She told her she'd be behind Bella one hundred percent no matter what she decided to do.

She'd encourage her to live at the dorms instead of staying at home while attending school to enjoy the full benefits of university living, but told her to come home anytime she wanted.

She didn't pressure her to choose a career path, only told her to take her time and find something she really loved.

Would her free spirited mother be as understanding if Bella told her she was sleeping with a man in his forties?

Bella pulled into Charlie's driveway and quietly let herself into the house. It was a little after nice, but the house showed no sign of life.

She decided to make some coffee and threw her bag on the couch before heading to the kitchen.

"Ouch! What the hell?" Edward cried.

Bella spun around, startled. Edward sat up tossing her bag to the floor.

"Sorry. I didn't see you there."

"S'ok," he mumbled rubbing his head.

"The couch wasn't pulled out," she tried to explain. "I thought you were upstairs."

"I was." He smirked. "It's a little noisy up there."

"Noisy?" Bella looked up at the ceiling. "Why is it- Oh. Never mind," she muttered turning back to the kitchen.

She poured water in the coffee maker, tossed some grounds in a filter and turned it on.

"Have fun with your friend?" Edward asked from the living room.

"Edward, I don't want to fight."

"I only asked a simple question."

"I'm just saying."

"Okay, noted. Did you have fun?"

"Yes," Bella hesitantly answered staring at the coffee pot as it brewed.

"Hmm." Edward left the couch and came to stand beside her. "You're back early."

"Uh huh."

"Couldn't have been too much fun." He grinned.

"Something unexpected came up," she lied.

"I'm sure something came up, but it wasn't unexpected," he laughed. She glared at him. "C'mon, it was funny." He bumped her arm with his.

"Hilarious."

"Here I thought you'd be in a better mood after getting some," he remarked.

Color filled Bella's cheeks.

"Who said I got any?"

"That blush." Edward pointed.

"Can we not talk about this, please?" she asked pouring the coffee and adding sugar.

"Sure." He handed her the milk. "What would you like to talk about?"

"Nothing. I want to sit down, relax and do nothing."

"That hard of a night, huh?"

Bella ignored him and left. Edward watched her go into the living room and curl up on the couch. A few minutes later he flopped down beside her.

"Can I join you in doing nothing?" He smiled.

"If you keep your inappropriate comments to yourself."

"That's no fun."

"Then go upstairs."

He frowned. "That's less fun. That just reminds me I'm the only one in the house not getting any."

Bella yawned, ignoring his comment again.

"How about some T.V. then?" he asked.

She shrugged as he reached for the remote. She set her mug down on the coffee table as he flipped through the channels.

"Is there anything besides cartoons and game shows on in the morning?" he muttered.

"Umm…talk shows."

"Why do you people go on them? Who wants the whole world to know about your problems, anyway?"

"Lots of people apparently," Bella said fighting to keep her eyes open.

One minute she was listening to Edward rant about Jerry Springer, the next she woke up in her parents' bedroom.

How had she gotten up here?

She kicked the blankets off and got up. She could hear the T.V. on downstairs as she made her way to the bathroom.

"Bella's up!" She heard Alice cry as she closed the door.

She quickly did her business, washed up and went downstairs to join the others.

"Hello, Bella." Jasper grinned slyly at her. "How was your evening?"

"Um, fine. Thanks," Bella answered slowly.

"Did McNaughty live up to his name?"

Bella started at him and he winked at her before turning back to the screen.

Confused, Bella looked at Alice who shifted her eyes away. What the hell? Jasper acted as if he knew something and Alice looked guilty as hell.

Cold realization washed over Bella.

_No!_

She couldn't possibly have told him about Carlisle.

"Alice," Bella said quietly trying not to freak out, "can you-"

"Get you something to eat?" Alice jumped up and practically sprinted for the kitchen. "You've been sleeping awhile," she called from the safety of the fridge. "Must have been some night."

Jasper chuckled.

"I hope you don't mind me putting you to bed," Edward said. "You fell asleep and looked uncomfortable."

"Oh. Uh, thanks," she said feeling uncomfortable.

She glared at Alice who had busied herself cutting fruit. Bella stomped into the kitchen intent on giving her former best friend a tongue lashing.

"How could you?" Bella hissed the second she was beside her.

"I didn't!" Alice whispered back. "He figured it out. I swear, Bella, I didn't say a word!"

"How did he know?"

"He pieced it together from the whole McNaughty thing."

"Alice!" Bella cried.

"I'm sorry!"

"He's going to tell Edward!"

"No." Alice shook her head. "He promised he wouldn't." She glanced towards the living room quickly. "He said it's none of his business and he'd stay out of it."

"And you believe him?"

"Yes," Alice said firmly.

"If you're wrong…."

"If I'm wrong then we'll beat him down together," Alice promised. "What's the big deal, anyway? Who cares if people know?"

"It's private! If we want people to know we'll tell them. Not you or your latest play thing," Bella snapped a little too loudly.

Edward and Jasper both turned to look at them.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked as Jasper looked from Bella to Alice.

"Nothing. Alice is just testing the boundaries of our friendship again," Bella accused.

Alice looked like she was going to burst into tears, but Bella stormed out of the room and back upstairs before she could feel guilty. Alice and her big mouth.

_How could she be so stupid?_

She dropped onto the bed, fuming. This wasn't her secret to tell!

There was a gentle knock on the door. Bella glared at it and cried, "Go away, Alice."

The door opened and Jasper slipped in.

"I'm not Alice if it makes you feel any better."

Bella shook her head and looked away.

"It doesn't."

"Alice didn't betray your confidence, Bella," he said softly getting right to the point. "The McNaughty/doctor thing was a little obvious once I started thinking about it."

Bella was even more uncomfortable than she was downstairs. Was she really being called out by her lover's son's best friend?

"I think you can understand why I don't want to talk about this, Jasper," Bella said still not looking at him.

"Sure. Talking about your and…Carlisle's sex life isn't high on my discussion list either." He smiled. "I just wanted to tell you myself that I won't say anything to Edward."

Bella finally looked at him and saw he was sincere. She nodded.

"Thank you."

"And take it easy on Alice. She really didn't do anything wrong," he said and left.

Bella started at the door long after he'd disappeared. She wasn't sure how long she'd been sitting there when Alice quietly walked in.

She dropped Bella's bag and purse on the floor and sat next to her on the bed, handing her her cell without saying a word. Bella looked from the phone to her friend.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you," Bella finally said.

"I'm sorry Jasper found out," she told her. "But I swear I didn't-"

"I know," Bella sighed. "Jasper was up here and told me."

"So you believe him when he tells you I didn't say anything, but you don't believe me when I tell you?" Alice asked, hurt.

"I never said I didn't believe you, Alice. I know you, though. Sometimes you say things before you realize what you've said."

Alice looked like she wanted to argue, but kept quiet.

"It doesn't matter," Bella muttered.

"This is the last thing I wanted to happen, Bella."

"I know."

They both remained silent for a few minutes lost in their own thoughts. Alice finally broke the silence and asked, "How are you? Was it hard to say goodbye?"

Bella looked at her confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Ending it with Carlisle. I don't imagine you'll find the time to get together between now and Sunday."

"We didn't end it," Bella said.

"What do you mean you didn't end it? It's Wednesday, Bella. Sunday will be here before you know it and waiting will just make it that much harder."

"No, I mean we're not ending it," Bella tried to explain. "It's not over just because I'm going home."

Alice looked lost.

"How does that work?" she asked.

"I think he's going to try and visit me in Phoenix."

"You think?" She looked frustrated now. "Where is this coming from? What happened?"

"I asked him if he'd ever been to Phoenix and when he said no, I told him if he had the time he should come." Alice blankly stared at her. "He asked if the invitation was still open if he didn't have the time for a few months-"

"And you told him yes." Alice rolled her eyes.

"Yes, and don't roll your eyes. I told him as long as he wanted the offer was good. And he said…." Bella smiled as her heart fluttered again remembering.

"What?" Alice asked impatiently.

"That I may have just locked myself in for a lifetime."

Alice didn't look nearly as excited as Bella felt.

"_May_ have? So, basically if he has the time you might see him and in the meantime you get to wait around for him."

"No. That's not what he meant," Bella said as some of her giddy bubble deflated just a little.

"That's kinda what it sounds like."

"You weren't there!" Bella cried standing up and facing her. "You don't know."

Bella's cell vibrated in her hand. She glanced at the number, but didn't recognize it.

"Don't answer that right now," Alice said. "I want to talk to you about this. Please," she added.

Bella looked at her and hit the 'ignore' button, putting the phone on the nightstand.

"Talk about what?" Bella asked annoyed and hurt that she was trying to ruin this for her. "You've already made up your mind that it's horrible. It's not even your business."

"It is my business if it hurts you because you're my best friend and I love you."

"People have long distance relationships all the time," Bella argued weakly.

"Yes, they do and if this was a relationship I'd be behind you a thousand percent. But its not."

"How do you know?"

"Is it? Have you two said you were going to give it a real chance?" Bella remained silent. "He's going to be here doing whatever he wants and you'll be back home waiting by the phone to hear from him." Alice stood and grabbed her hands. "I like Carlisle, I do, but he's older. Do you want to waste how many years of your life waiting for someone who might not give you what you want in the end?"

"I don't want anything. We talked about that. I told him how I feel about marriage and kids. I'm not you, Alice! Not everyone needs their happily ever after to include a ring on their finger and a child in their womb."

"Fine!" Alice cried throwing up her hands. "You don't want matrimony or a family, but you still have to _be_ with someone to have a relationship. He has a career in Seattle now, he bought a house, and he's settled. Do you think he's going to turn his back on all that and move to Phoenix?"

"I don't know." Bella felt frustrated having this conversation with her for the millionth time. Why couldn't Alice just smile and nod and not voice her opinion all the time. "Maybe I could move here if things worked out," Bella said.

"You hate Washington!" Alice cried.

"I hated Forks because there was nothing here, but Seattle is different. I could go to school or work or whatever just as easily as I could back home."

"You'd uproot your entire life for him?" she asked, surprised.

"What life?" Bella asked getting annoyed. "I went to school and that's it. You're planning to go to New York. Why can't I move to Seattle?"

"I thought you'd want to come with me," Alice said quietly.

"And follow you around for the rest of your life while you make something of yourself?" Bella looked at her. "Is that what this is about? You don't want me to leave unless it's with you?"

"Bella, don't be stupid. I don't want to see you put your life on hold for a man who may or may not have time for you."

"It's my life. I can do whatever I want," Bella said moving away from her.

"I feel like this is partially my fault," Alice said sadly. "I encouraged you to go after him, but I never thought you'd fall in love with him."

And there she went using the word that terrified Bella more than anything. Why did she have to bring love into it? And Esme? Esme had said the same thing to Bella at the wedding. Apparently, the only two that weren't vocally expressing how they felt about each other were the two that were actually in the relationship.

"Alice, please, I don't want to talk about this anymore." She wrapped her arms around her waist. "Thank you for your concern, but I'll be fine. No matter what happens."

"Fine," Alice muttered walking to the door. She paused just before leaving and said, "I'll be here for you. No matter what happens."

Bella waited until she heard the door close before crawling onto the bed. She grabbed a pillow and hugged it close to her body. Her temples throbbed indicating a headache was about to hit and she closed her eyes, ignoring her grumbling stomach. She didn't feel tired, but the shrill ringing of her cell woke her hours later. Bella groped for it in the dark, finally finding it. Groggy, she sat up and flicked on the lamp that was sitting on the nightstand and answered not looking at the caller i.d.

"Hello?" Her voice sounded raspy from sleep.

"Isabella? Did I wake you?" Carlisle asked.

"It's okay." She glanced at the clock and saw it was after eight. "I've slept most of the day, anyway."

"I just wanted to make sure you got home okay."

Bella noticed immediately there was something different about his voice. Her heart dropped to her stomach and fear tightened her chest. She couldn't explain it, but she knew something was wrong. He didn't sound as intimate as he usually did. Not as warm. He sounded distant, flat.

"How-how was your day?" Bella asked on the verge of tears for no reason.

"It was fine," he said.

Silence.

"Carlisle…" Bella couldn't continue. Her throat closed and tears spilled down her cheeks.

"I've been thinking," he finally said, his voice low. "These past two weeks with you have been amazing. You found a part of me I didn't know existed and brought it back to life."

"Please," Bella begged softly, not sure what she was even begging for.

"You are a beautiful person, Isabella," he continued as if he didn't hear her. "I am honoured to have met you and been a small part of your life. But I can't do this anymore. It's not fair to you."

"I don't understand," she said in a small voice.

"You're just so young. Too young to be with someone my age, despite what you may think. You need someone that you can grow with. Someone who can give you the opportunity to have the things you say you don't want."

"But I don't want them!"

"You don't want them now, but in ten years, who knows? You'll only be in your early thirties and still young enough to have a family."

"You'll only be in your early fifties," she voiced softly.

"Too told to have a family," he said sadly. "You need someone your age that can do those things with you."

"There are men in their sixties and seventies still having children, Carlisle!" Bella cried.

"And how fair is that to the child?" he asked.

"But I don't even want kids!" she insisted. "Why is this even an issue? It's so far down the road we shouldn't even be thinking about it."

"That's my point," he said calmly. "I don't want you wasting your youth on me. It's not fair," he said again.

"It's only wasting it if I regret being with you."

"And I don't want to take that chance. This has to end. It's over."

"But…" _I love you._ "I make you smile." Even to herself it sounded ridiculous, but she'd say anything to get him to listen.

"You-"

"Not even twenty-four hours ago you were telling me I could stay with you. That you wanted me to stay with you!" she cried. "You were going to come to Phoenix…. Please, Carlisle."

"I'm sorry." He inhaled deeply like a man who was trying to hold in his emotions. "Take care of yourself, sweetheart. Please, don't think this is easy or that our time together meant nothing. It meant everything."

"Carlisle!"

"Goodbye, Isabella," he said and hung up.

"No!" Bella wailed.

Her crying turned into uncontrollable sobs until she couldn't breathe anymore. She gasped for air. The pain was so bad she imagined her heart really was breaking in half.

_He didn't want her._

The realization of his words sank in and made her cry harder. She lay on her side, panting for air, holding the phone as close to her heart as possible.

"Bella?" Edward called coming into the room. "Is everything alright? I thought I heard- Bella!" He rushed to her side and knelt by the bed. "Alice!" he hollered.

Within seconds Alice was in the room, Jasper close behind her.

"Bella?" Alice brushed the hair off her face. "What's wrong? Is it Charlie?"

Bella shook her head and buried her face in the pillow. Instantly Alice understood and she turned to the other two.

"Will you go, please?"

"Is she okay?" Edward asked.

"She's just had her heart broke," Alice snapped. "What do you think?"

"Dude, let's go," Jasper said grabbing his sleeve. "This is woman territory."

Edward looked at Bella one last time and left.

"What happened?" Alice asked as soon as the door closed.

"He…he doesn't…want me!" Bella sobbed.

"No." Alice softly stroked her hair as she continued to weep. "He does want you. That's the problem."

**********

The pain she felt over the next couple of days was unreal. It hurt more than when James had betrayed her. The five years she'd been with him felt like nothing compared to the two weeks she'd been with Carlisle. It made no sense to feel this way over something that didn't even have a chance to get started. At least with James she knew why they weren't together. That made the break up easier to accept and move on. But she didn't understand this time.

All she knew was the man she was able to picture in her life was gone and his reasons made no sense.

Alice told her it was because he _did _love her that he was doing it. To protect her from any future disappointment or pain. Just like he'd done with Edward. That had upset Bella more than comfort her. She was a grown woman for Christ sake. Capable of making her own damn decisions. She didn't need a man trying to protect her or look out for her future well fare.

She intended to tell him just that and left countless voicemails, texts and even messages at the hotel, but he never returned any of them. She tired everything short of calling the hospital or driving down there to confront him. Alice told her to give him time, but time wasn't on her side. Charlie and Esme would be home in two days and she needed to talk to him before she left Forks.

And the more she thought of it the angrier she became. He was being nothing but a coward avoiding her. If you really loved someone you didn't put them through unnecessary pain.

_Maybe Alice was wrong then. Maybe it had nothing to do with love after all._

That was a sobering thought.

Was she throwing herself at a man who really didn't want her? Maybe he didn't break things off to be fair to her like he said, but because he just got bored.

No, that couldn't be it. Not after everything he said to her about how he felt. That had to be real.

Didn't it?

He wouldn't have told her about his past with Kate and Edward's secret if he hadn't trusted her. Hadn't cared for her.

Right?

Bella's head felt like it was going to explode from all the questions she had and confusion she felt.

She'd cooped herself up in the bedroom for the past two days so she wouldn't have to see anyone. Only Alice had come to check on her, the other left her alone, which she was grateful for. They'd gone out to dinner tonight, so Bella knew it was safe to leave the room and not have three pairs of eyes staring at her.

She wandered into the kitchen and grabbed a bag of Oreos out of the cupboard. She paused by the wine cabinet on the way to the living room and quickly returned to the kitchen for a glass. She grabbed a bottle and shuffled to the couch.

Cookies and wine. Yep, totally classy.

She dropped to the couch, setting the bottle and glass on the coffee table and ripped open the bag of cookies. She poured a glass and reached for the remote. She needed to be distracted for a few hours so she wouldn't think of Carlisle.

What was he doing right now? Working? At the hotel? Was he thinking of her? He had to have gotten all the messages she sent. What did he think of them? Did they make him regret his decision and ache to be with her? Or did he delete them without reading or listening to a single one?

_Fuck._

Bella drained her glass, immediately refilling it with the red liquid. Before long one glass turned into two, two into three, three into four, the bag of cookie disappeared and she was soon gleefully laughing at every shot Angelina Jolie took at Brad Pitt in _Mr. & Mrs. Smith._

She heard the front door open, but didn't bother to look to see who came in until they were standing beside her.

"Party for one?" Edward asked smiling.

"It would seem so." She looked around. "Where's Alice and Jasper?"

"Went to a movie."

"Why didn't you go?"

"I came back to check on you," he said.

"Well, I'm fine."

His eyes roamed over the empty cookie tray and what little remained of the wine.

"I can't see that."

"Look, if you're here to start a fight-"

"I'm not." He sat beside her and brushed a crumb from her lip. "I'm here to offer you company if you want it."

Bella bit her lip and nodded. Edward smiled again and settled back on the couch.

"What are we watching?" he asked.

"Mr. & Mrs. Smith."

"Ah. The beginning of the end for Brad and Jennifer."

"I don't believe that. If two people are supposed to be together nothing can come between them," she said sadly.

"Hmm. Many would disagree with you and call Angie a home wrecker."

"You can't be a home wrecker without a willing participant," Bella muttered.

Edward looked at her.

"Did he cheat on you?" he asked suddenly.

"What?" Bella snapped her head up and started at him.

"The boyfriend."

"No," Bella snapped. "He didn't do anything wrong."

"Except break your heart."

"He thought it was for my own good," she murmured.

Edward was silent for a few minutes and then asked, "Why do you hurt someone for their own good?"

Bella grabbed the bottle and filled her glass again. It was starting to make her head fuzzy. Fuzzy was good. Fuzzy meant she wouldn't have to think for awhile.

An hour and a bottle and a half later, Bella was more than fuzzy. She was well on her way to being drunk.

"I think you should slow down, Bella," Edward advised as she filled her glass yet again.

"You don't seem like the type to slow down, Edward. Or advise other people to do so." She watched him until he looked at her, locking their eyes. Only she didn't see Edward's eyes. She saw Carlisle's.

She looked away and blinked back the tears.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked leaning forward.

"Fine." She forced a smile and glanced at him. "I guess you'll be leaving soon," she said changing the subject.

"Yeah, I don't know if I'll stick around until Esme gets home or not."

"I'm sure she'd like to see you again."

"We'll see." He shrugged. "Are you looking forward to going home?"

The fire burned in her chest again at the question.

"I'm not sure," she mumbled.

"Disappointed you won our bet, huh?" he teased grinning.

Bella giggled, the wine taking over once again.

"Yeah, that's a shame."

Edward laughed at her sarcasm.

"There's still time to change that." He winked.

Bella stared at him. Two days ago she would have jumped off the couch, told him to stop being a jerk and left him alone. But tonight…tonight the wine and the pain over Carlisle not wanting her made her stay.

It was Edward's eyes. They were _his_ eyes. Despite wanting to resist, they called to her. Made it impossible for her to breathe. To think.

"Bella, I was just kidding," Edward said. "Don't worry. I won't try and seduce you."

"What if I want you to?" she whispered.

Edward narrowed his eyes and said, "You're drunk."

"No." _I'm hurt._

Edward shook his head and stood.

"You're in no condition to make this kind of decision."

Bella flinched. What was with the Cullen men trying to tell her what was good for her.

"What's wrong, Edward?" she taunted. "Are you all talk and no action?"

She stood slowly, wobbling slightly as she found her footing. She grabbed the hem of her shirt and lifted it over her head, dropping it to the floor.

"Bella." His eyes traveled over her body, pausing on the lacy bra hiding her breasts, before meeting her eyes. "You've had too much to drink. You don't know what you want."

"I know exactly what I want." _Your father to take a chance and not push me away. _"I'm standing here offering you what you've been after for days. Take it." _Walk away!_

Bella walked towards him until they were no more than a foot apart. Her entire being screamed for her to leave, but she said, "Take me, Edward. Make me yours," and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her mouth to his.

It only took seconds for Edward to respond. He grabbed her roughly and lifted her off her feet. Bella wrapped her legs around him as her heart tore apart again, this time from her own doing.

Edward spun her around and slammed her into the front door. Flashes of the hotel with Carlisle played behind her closed lids. She tried to push them away as Edward groped her breast, tugging down the cup to reveal her nipple.

His lips were hot on her skin as he sucked his pleasure and she had to bite her bottom lip hard to keep from screaming for him to stop.

_This wasn't right! Carlisle, _she sobbed silently.

Edward's mouth was on her neck, her jaw and then back on her mouth. His hands reached for the waistband of her yoga pants and she tensed, but didn't stop him from slipping his hand inside. He set her down on her feet, still assaulting her mouth with his lips and teeth and pulled her hips close to his. She felt his arousal against her pelvis, straining to be freed. The thought almost panicked her.

But it didn't stop her from mindlessly unbuckling his pants and spreading them open. Without warning, Edward groaned and grabbed her hands, ripping them away from his clothes.

"I can't do this, Bella," he said gruffly.

She stood there stunned by his words. She didn't even move when he reached up to pull her bra back in place. She watched him walk over to the couch and pick up her shirt and toss it at her. It fell at her feet.

"What do you mean you can't?"

"Look at you!" he cried standing a few feet away from her waving his arm in her direction, his jeans still open. "You're standing there looking like your about to cry, trying to respond to my touch." He looked disgusted. With himself or her, she wasn't sure. "That's not how I wanted this."

"Edward-"

"I know what this is about," he said. "When I pictured this I never thought you'd be on the rebound or hurt."

"This isn't about anything!" Bella cried. "I'm finally giving you what you want and you can't handle it!"

"Cut the shit, Bella," he bellowed. "You tell everyone to be honest all the time and yet you wouldn't know honesty if it slapped you in the face."

"I am being honest!"

"Really?" He smirked.

"Yes."

"So, tell me," he said his eyes instantly growing dark and cold, "how long have you been fucking my father?"

**A/N: This chapter was hard because of Carlisle's decision to end things. It broke my heart. But like I said in the previous chapter have faith! I believe they find each other again. And the real reasons why he did a total 180 will be revealed in the next chapter. **

**Honestly, I fully intended Bella to go into this and screw Edward. We've all done things that we know we really shouldn't do because we're hurt....or drunk. I mean, that can't be just me, right? Not in a million years did I think HE would be the one to stop it, but I am so glad the boy was thinking with the head above his shoulders. Now the drama really begins.**

**If you have a chance check out a youtube clip by greeneyedgirl2530. It was inspired by this fic. Lots of love out to her! If you search What Happens At Charlie's Wedding on youtube the clip is called unusual you // carlisle & bella (AU)**

**Also, for something amazing check out My Family and I by RedSummer. It's now on FF so search it! You'll fall inlove with Carlisle and Esme and be torn apart at the same her I sent you and leave her some love. And if you want something totally different and a little whacky and crazy, roll your eyes at times and LOL at others check out Seriously, I don't remember by punkpook. **

**One more thing before I send you off to give me some love. I'm sure many of you have read about the FF drama going on and the deletion of some amazing fics and authors. If for whatever reason this fic disappears, you can find me on the Writers Coffee Shop Library now also, as well as Twilighted of course.**


	15. Broken Promises

**You guys are really rocking the reviews lately. Love it!**

**Sadly, SM owns all things Twilight and even worse, I don't own Peter Facinelli. But I do own all the dirty thoughts he puts in my head that helps write the lemony goodness you all love ;)**

Bella instantly felt sick. She broke out in a cold sweat as the room started to spin. She closed her eyes and reached behind her, blindly searching for the door, needing something to lean on to keep her on her feet.

_How did he know? Had he clued in just as easily as Jasper had done? Had Jasper told him after all?_

"I don't know what you're talking about," she whispered weakly defending herself.

"You're actually going to stand there and lie to my face about this?" His sharp laugh was bitter and hateful.

"I'm not-"

"Do you really think I'm that stupid?" he cried. "Look at me!"

Bella's eyes snapped open at the demand. No, he didn't look stupid. He looked terrifying. She inhaled deeply through her nose and slowly shook her head as tears once again stung her cried out eyes. She shivered, suddenly feeling cold and wrapped her arms around her waist.

"Look at me and tell me I'm wrong," he said again his voice calmer this time.

She wasn't sure she could speak. Her mouth was dry and her tongue felt twice the size as it should be. Swallowing didn't help; it only made her feel like she was suffocating. She wanted to ask how he knew, but she couldn't get the words out. And by asking that she was admitting he was right.

_How did he know?!_

"It was obvious, Bella," Edward said as if reading her mind. "All those heated looks when you thought no one was watching and how comfortable you two were at the wedding. You kept me at arms length, but were nice and cozy with him."

"Edward,-"

"And the trip to Seattle," he continued. "If I hadn't actually seen you two together that would have tipped me off right there."

Bella's heart stopped.

_Seen them together?_

"Outside the restaurant after the rehearsal," he explained seeing her panicked expression. "You were comforting him, or he was comforting you, either way you really shouldn't do public displays of affection if you're trying to keep a fling a secret, Bella."

"You've known this entire time?" she gasped.

"Yeah." He smiled his crooked smile. The smile she knew right from the start would be trouble. "I am curious about one thing. If you were comforting him, what was it about? What did my sainted father do wrong?"

"Why didn't you say anything?" she cried ignoring his question. "Why did you…" _Oh my God. _"You knew and you still tried to sleep with me!" she cried.

"Why do you think I wanted to?" He shrugged like it was no big deal. "It was too perfect really when I discovered what was going on. Any fool could see how smitten he was with you. Just how far he'd fallen wasn't obvious until later, though."

"Why?" Bella's voice barely came out a whisper from being so surprised. "Why would you want to seduce the woman you knew was with your own father?"

"Do I really need to answer that?" he sneered.

"Oh my God." Bella stared at him as she remembered something from the other day. Everything suddenly clicked. "It wasn't only a competition to you. You tried to use me as revenge!" she cried her hysteria rising with her anger. "That's sick and twisted. _You__'__re _sick and twisted to try and screw your father's lover just to stick it to him. Do you really hate Carlisle that much?"

"Maybe." His eyes gleamed. "Or maybe I just liked the thrill of the chase. You weren't as easy as I marked you for, Bella. Apparently he never had any problems getting between your legs, though."

"Shut up!" Bella cried.

"But then he went and broke up with you," Edward continued ignoring her, "and turned you into this snivelling, pathetic mess."

"Shut up!" she screamed again. "Everything you told me…all those times I thought I caught a glimpse of a good guy…. It was all lies," she accused. "It was revenge that fuelled your desire to be with me, not attraction."

"Everything I told you was true," he corrected her. "I needed you to like me at least a little bit." He smirked. "And it was mostly revenge, but I still think you're hot if that makes you feel better."

"But why?" Bella cried near tears. "Why would you do that to him? All he's ever done is love you and protect you and this is how you repay him?"

"Love me?" Edward laughed. "Just because you give somebody everything they could possibly want doesn't mean you love them. Just because you're blood doesn't mean you love them."

"This doesn't make any sense," she mumbled. "Why could you possibly want to hurt him like this? He's a good man, Edward. He's decent and kind and honest-" She stopped defending him. He wasn't really honest, was he? But even then he only lied to spare Edward's feelings. "If you were half the man he was-"

"Jesus!" Edward cried cutting her off. "Listen to you! He's just thrown you away and you're standing there defending him."

"He didn't throw me away!" Bella snapped. "You wouldn't understand because you don't have an honourable bone in your body."

"Honourable? Using someone is honourable?" Edward laughed again.

"He didn't use me!" she screamed. "You tried to use me in your sick vendetta against your father. Why? Because you blame him for your mother leaving?" Edward shifted his eyes away. "Oh my God, that's it. That's why you did this!"

Edward zipped his pants up avoiding her, but not defending himself against her accusation.

Somewhere in the back of her mind she realized she was standing there having this argument with him in her bra, but at that moment she didn't care.

"Please, tell me that's not the reason," she said.

"You are the only woman I've ever seen him look at the way he does," Edward told her. "When he looks at you his face is full of admiration, amazement, ecstasy and love," he spat. "But still you weren't good enough. No woman is perfect enough for Carlisle Cullen, so he cast you aside just like he did to her."

"You are so fucking delusional it's not even funny!" Bella yelled. "You think you know what happened in the past with Kate and Carlisle, but you couldn't be more wrong!" As soon as the words were out of her mouth she knew she'd said too much and it was too late to take them back.

She could see the surprise on Edward's face as he stared at her. She saw his body stiffen as he narrowed his eyes in her direction.

"What did you say?" he asked his voice low.

Bella snatched up her shirt and yanked it on.

"It isn't my place to tell you," she told him. "Ask Carlisle."

"Ask him what?" Edward demanded his voice rising. "What do you know about my mother?"

"Ask Carlisle," she told him again.

_What had she done?_

Carlisle had begged her not to say anything. He'd trusted her to keep his secret. He'd never forgive her for this.

Edward sneered. "So he can tell me the same lies he's told you?" He snorted. "I can't believe you're that gullible, Bella."

"They're not lies," she said softly.

"Did he make himself out to be the victim? Tell you he was jilted by the woman who got tired of being put last?" Bella shook her head and looked away. "Is that how he got you into bed? By sympathy?"

"Shut up!" she growled through clenched teeth.

"And you were stupid enough to fall for it. Now you're in love with him and he doesn't want you. Consider yourself lucky, Bella. You would have ended up just like her. Alone and forgotten."

"You don't know anything."

"I know my father likes to act all noble, but he's the most selfish person under it all. He takes advantage of people-"

"Your mother wasn't some innocent naive girl, Edward!" Bella screamed before she could stop herself. "She was a thirty-something married professor who seduced her student and ended up pregnant."

The silence around them was deafening. Edward gaped at her, his mouth open like he wanted to say something but wasn't sure what. Bella swallowed over the lump in her throat and cursed herself for being so stupid. She'd really done it now.

Finally, he found his voice and asked, "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I've already said more than I should," Bella muttered. "Go ask your father."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" he screamed this time making Bella jump, frightened by his outburst. "Are these the lies he's told you?"

"The only lies he's told are to you, Edward," she said carefully. "To protect you."

"What a bunch of shit." He laughed. "He must have really sweet talked you. That or you like to whore yourself out to every guy with a sob story."

Bella recoiled as if she'd been slapped. Whatever compassion she felt she owed Edward vanished in that split second.

"Did you ever wonder why there aren't any pictures of your mother around, Edward?" she asked coldly. "Even if Carlisle had been telling you the truth about why she left, why wouldn't he have kept the pictures of her for you to have?"

"He threw them away," Edward snapped.

"And you say I'm gullible," she spat. "There are no pictures, Edward, because she was never in your life at any time. She abandoned you before you were even born. And your father, the man you hate so much, was the only one to step up and take responsibility for you."

"You're a liar," he said, but he didn't sound as confident as he had before.

"He raised you on his own from the day you were born because your mother didn't want a child to complicate her life!" she shouted. "If anyone was taken advantage of and treated poorly it was Carlisle." The anger she felt boiled over faster than she could control it. "And you! You sit on your high horse judging him for every thing he's ever done when all he's ever tried to do was keep the truth from you so you wouldn't be hurt."

"I don't believe you," Edward said turning away.

"He begged me not to tell you," she continued walking toward him. "That's what you saw outside the restaurant that night. He didn't want you to know that Kate walked away from you without as much as a backwards glance. Besides Esme, Carlisle was the only one that wanted you, Edward. Every lie he's ever told you, as wrong as it may be, was out of love. Something you obviously know nothing about."

"You're a lying bitch!" Edward exclaimed spinning around and grabbing her arms. His eyes were wild with rage; his lip was pulled back over his teeth in a snarl. Bella winced as his hands tightened around her arms.

"Edward, you're hurting me," she whimpered.

He snapped out of his anger induced haze and released her, gently pushing her away from him and walking to the door.

"Ask Carlisle," she told him before he could leave, rubbing her arms where his hand print marked her skin.

"Why would I trust him when obviously he's the one that told you all this bull shit?"

"Then ask Esme!" She turned to face him as he reached the door.

His hand dropped from the door knob and he looked at her.

"You're saying Esme knows? That she's in on all this?" Edward looked sick, like he'd been betrayed by the only person he ever trusted.

Despite all the anger she felt towards him, Bella's heart suddenly broke for him. Esme had been his rock.

"She may have gone along with all this, but she wants you to know the truth more than you can imagine," Bella told him softly trying to sooth what damage she'd done.

He looked from the door to her again. His eyes were still cold, but they had the look of a lost little boy that was sad and alone.

"You're no better than me, Bella," he said thickly. "You say I was using you to get even with my father, but what were you doing by throwing yourself at me? How do you think he'll feel about that?"

The sound of the door slamming echoed around her.

_He was going to tell Carlisle!_

Bella had never felt more ashamed than right then. What would he think of her practically begging Edward to have sex with her? And everything she'd told him! Carlisle trusted her not to breathe a word about any of this. And what had she done? She'd told him everything out of anger. She'd destroyed twenty years of Edward's beliefs and Carlisle's good intentions in twenty minutes.

A wave of nausea rolled over her. If there had been any chance they could work things out, she'd just shot it to hell. How would he forgive her for this?

And Edward. How could he possibly be feeling right now? As angry as she'd been with him she knew he hadn't deserved to hear the truth about his life from her. She was a stranger to him. A stranger that knew more about his family's past than he did. The truth should have come from Carlisle. Is that where Edward had gone? Was he going to confront his father with the truth?

Should she call him? Not that he'd answer, but didn't he deserve a heads up about Edward? She could tell him it was an emergency and he needed to call her ASAP. It didn't seem like the kind of thing to leave in a voicemail.

Should she call Esme? Esme would know what to do, how to handle the fall out of all this. But Esme was on her honeymoon. How selfish would it be of Bella to call crying to her about the chaos she'd caused and ruin the rest of her days alone with Charlie?

Bella stared at the phone mounted on the kitchen wall. She couldn't call Esme and as much as she knew she should, she couldn't bring herself to call Carlisle. The anger he'd surely have towards her was more than she could think about. The thought of him hating her put her in a panic and she started sobbing to the point of hysteria.

Blindly, she made her way to the couch and sank down on the cushions. She curled into a ball, pulling her knees close to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Her body shook from her sobs as what she'd done fully sank in.

This wasn't just about Carlisle hating her, or Edward thinking she was a lying bitch. It went so much deeper than that.

Edward now knew the truth, and the truth wasn't just about his mother. He was now faced with the fact that Carlisle had lied to him his entire life. He wouldn't be able to see that it was for his own good and that the lie showed just how much Carlisle loved him like Bella saw. He'd only see this as an act of betrayal. As his father once again proving how selfish he was. Their relationship was already strained to say the least. This could very well be the thing that distanced them forever. That broke apart their family for good.

She could be the reason Carlisle lost his son.

The door opened and she lifted her tear streaked face hoping more than ever to see Edward. She needed to talk to him, to explain it all to him before this all went too far.

But it was Alice and Jasper that walked in, both laughing at something the other said. Alice stopped in her tracks as soon as she saw Bella.

"What's wrong?" she asked. Bella shook her head, the tears spilling down her cheeks. "Awe, sweetie." Alice came to her and wrapped an arm around her. "It's going to be okay."

"No." Bella's voice was hoarse from crying. Her throat burned when she spoke. "I did something."

"You mean besides consuming two thousand calories in cookies," Alice said casting a glance at the empty cookie tray.

"And several bottles of win," Jasper muttered eying the empty bottles.

"I've ruined their relationship," Bella whispered.

That caught Alice's attention as she asked, "Ruined whose relationship?"

"Edward knows."

Alice's eyes widened and Jasper blew a low whistle. He shoved his hands in his pockets and asked, "Is he here?"

Bella shook her head, still staring at her knees.

"Why did you tell him?" Alice asked softly.

"I didn't."

"Carlisle?" Her voice rose in surprise.

"No." Bella looked up at Jasper.

"Hey!" Jasper cried raising his hands in defence. "I didn't say a word."

"How did you know then?" Alice asked looking at him suspiciously.

"He's known all along," Bella said. "He saw us outside the restaurant after rehearsal."

"And he still tried to hook up with you?" Alice asked disgusted. "Why would he do that?"

Bella continued to look at Jasper who suddenly looked very uncomfortable.

"Did you know he knew?" she asked him. "Is that why you told me to be careful if he had alternative motives?"

"You knew?" Alice cried glaring at him.

"No! I swear, Alice, I didn't." He shook his head.

"So, you had no idea?" Alice questioned him.

"Alice, if he's known this entire time its news to me."

"I believe you, Jasper," Bella said.

Alice still looked at him like she was trying to decide if she believed him or not, but finally turned back to Bella.

"Why are you so upset, though? What's the big deal that he knows about you and Carlisle?" Alice asked.

If she had any tears left to cry she would have.

"Alice, I…told him the secret," she sobbed.

"The secret?" Jasper arched an eyebrow. "Am I not supposed to hear this?"

"I don't know what it is either," Alice muttered.

"Carlisle lied to Edward about his mother," Bella blurted.

_Ugh! What was wrong with her? Could she not keep her mouth shut?_

Did it really even matter now that Edward knew? That was the only person Carlisle was worried about protecting.

"Edward's mother was a married professor. She taught a class Carlisle was in and one thing led to another and they had an affair," Bella told them.

"What?" Alice cried.

"Go Carlisle!" Jasper exclaimed. Alice and Bella glared at him. "You gotta see this from a guy's perspective," he told them. "The hot teacher and the willing student." Jasper wiggled his eyebrows. When neither of them looked amused he nodded. "Okay, guy moment over. That's horrible."

Alice rolled her eyes.

"It is horrible," Bella insisted. "She got pregnant with Edward and basically told Carlisle he could keep the baby or she'd get rid of it because she didn't want him. She walked away without a blink of an eye."

"Wait," Jasper said looking confused. "Carlisle told Edward that he asked his mother to leave him behind when she left. He said that things didn't work out between them."

"That's why it's called a lie," Alice said sounding annoyed.

"I always thought his parents had been together and his mother was too young to know what she'd gotten into," Jasper remarked.

Bella nodded. "That's what Carlisle wanted him to believe also."

"How can a mother throw her child away like yesterday's garbage," Alice wondered sadly.

"She didn't want kids," Bella said. "She gave Carlisle an out and he didn't take it. He stepped up and took responsibility."

"You don't want kids," Alice said to her. "Would you be able to just walk away?"

"Isn't that what parents do when they give their baby up for adoption?" Jasper pointed out to Alice before Bella could reply. "Sure, some do it because they don't want them, but others do it because they know they can't give the child a life it deserves."

"Whose side are you on?" Alice snapped.

"Edward's," Jasper answered. "I'm just saying it doesn't mean she didn't care because she chose to walk away. Would you have rather she kept him and resented him his entire life?"

"I don't think she did care," Bella said before a fight broke out. "Carlisle said she compared having a child to having a crippling disease."

Alice looked at him smugly.

"Okay, maybe she didn't care," he muttered.

"Why did you tell him?" Alice asked getting back on topic.

"I was angry," Bella said sheepishly. "We got into an argument after-" She stopped and felt her cheeks burn.

"Oh Christ," Alice moaned. "Bella, tell me you didn't do Edward."

"No. We… Nothing happened." Bella lowered her eyes to her lap again. "He was saying some awful things about Carlisle and I just snapped, I guess."

"Where did he go?" Jasper asked.

"I don't know."

Jasper pulled out his cell and stepped away from the two of them. Alice moved closer to her once he was out of the room.

"Okay, really nothing happened?" she whispered.

Bella looked at her. "I was going to," she confessed. "I didn't want to, but I was going to. He stopped it."

"Maybe he's not such an ass after all," Alice muttered.

"He only wanted to sleep with me because I was with Carlisle. I would have been his revenge."

"Why did he stop?"

"Because, according to him, Carlisle turned me into a snivelling, pathetic mess and that took the fun out of it."

"Or he didn't want to hurt you anymore," Alice said thoughtfully.

Bella looked at her. Could she be right, did Edward not want to hurt her anymore? Is that why he wouldn't let her make the mistake of sleeping with him because he knew she'd regret it? Bella looked up as Jasper entered the room, snapping his phone shut.

"Where is he?" she asked.

"Wouldn't say," Jasper told her looking concerned. "He just said he had something to take care of."

"God, he's going to confront Carlisle," Bella moaned into her hands.

"Maybe you did a good thing, Bella," Jasper said. She looked up at him. "There's been tension and hostility between Edward and Carlisle for as long I can remember. Maybe this is what they need to move forward."

"Jasper's right," Alice chimed in. "They both may be pissed with you now, but in the end you might have done the best thing possible."

"Do you really think so?" Bella asked hopefully.

Could it really be that simple? Instead of ruining their relationship could she have just put everything in motion to make it better?

"I think it's possible. Don't get your hopes up yet, though," Alice cautioned. "It could take awhile before they're grateful."

"Do you think I should call Carlisle and warn him?" Bella looked from Alice to Jasper. "It's only right, isn't it?"

"I don't know," Alice said. "It only seems fair, but what if Edward doesn't go to Carlisle tonight?"

"Eventually he's going to have to know," Jasper pointed out. "Isn't it better to tell him so he can be prepared?"

"I think this is a choice only you can make, Bella," Alice told her. "Do what you think is right."

In the end she didn't call him. She knew it was cowardly, but she also didn't want the first time she talked to him in days to be tainted by her disloyalty. The fact that it was inevitable tore at her heart.

She tossed and turned all night worrying her cell would ring and Carlisle would be on the other end blaming her for everything. The anger she could handle. It was the disappointment and hurt he'd feel that she wouldn't be able to stand.

Edward still hadn't returned by noon the next day, nor had Bella received a phone call from Carlisle. Maybe he was too upset and wouldn't call. Maybe he never wanted to speak to her again, even if it was only to tell her how horrible she was.

She sat around the house all day waiting to hear something. She feared the other shoe was about to drop at any moment and she was paralyzed to stop it.

Maybe she should call him.

Wouldn't it be better to talk about it with him than ignore it? Didn't she owe him an explanation as to why she told Edward? An explanation might even help him see her side so he'd know it wasn't done without cause. After all, she'd gotten mad defending him. That had to mean something, right?

She'd just picked up her cell when there was a knock at the door.

Or maybe she'd just been saved from making a huge mistake.

Bella opened the door and immediately felt light headed from the rush of emotions that ran through her body. Happy, sad, guilt, shame…love. She didn't know which to feel first or which to show.

"Hello, Isabella," Carlisle greeted smiling softly.

"Carlisle," she breathed.

_Smiling was good, right? Smiling meant he didn__'__t hate her, right?_

"Can I come in?" he asked.

"Edward's not here," she told him not moving to let him in. "He left."

"Oh." His face fell slightly. "I didn't know he was leaving."

"He didn't come see you? Or call?"

_Oh God, he didn__'__t know!_

"No, but that doesn't surprise me," he said sadly and then smiled at her again. "Are you going to let me in?"

"Oh." He didn't know. This meant she'd have to tell him. Here. Face to face. She couldn't do it. Not when he was looking at her like…_that_! That look made her heart race.

Bella swallowed, fighting the urge to be sick. She should send him away and tell him he needed to call his son right now. She should stop staring into his emerald green eyes and close the door. She should stop feeling the need to throw herself in his arms and confess everything, right down to the fact that she loved him.

"Isabella?" he asked waiting for her to move.

"Sorry." She took a step back. "Come in."

He walked in, brushing her arm with his has he passed. Shivers ran down her spine and goose bumps rose on her arm. Just the slightest touch from him sent her body into overdrive.

She closed the door behind him and still facing away from him asked, "Why are you here?"

"I want to talk to you."

"I've left messages, many messages, and you never returned any of them." She still faced the door afraid if she looked at him she'd break down. "You had chances to talk."

She heard him walk up to her and when he placed his hands on her arms her heart felt like it had jumped out of her chest.

"I'm sorry, Isabella," he murmured. "I should have called, but I needed time to think."

Bella shrugged his hands off her and moved away. She stopped at the kitchen table and turned to face him.

"To think about what? How you led me to believe you wanted to be with me?" she asked bitterly.

"I understand that you're angry."

"No. I'm hurt and confused and…." Bella stopped talking and bit her lip. He looked just as lost as she felt. "I don't understand, Carlisle."

"Will you let me explain?" he asked begging her with his eyes.

A part of her wanted to send him away still. That would be easier than hearing him out only to watch him walk away again after he found out what she'd done.

The other part needed to know, wanted to know, why he broke it off. That part hoped he'd listen to her too when it was her time to explain her actions.

She nodded and wrapped her arms around her middle.

"I didn't lead you on," he began. "Everything I told you, everything I felt, is true. I think we both went into this thinking it was going to be a fun fling." He looked at her and when she didn't confirm or deny his words he continued. "But somewhere along the way things got intense and feelings that weren't supposed to be there suddenly were. At least for me," he added.

Bella shook her head. "Not just for you."

"You know my biggest concern is our age difference. When you're just having fun it's not such a big deal, but when you start to care for the person it becomes an entirely different scenario."

"I told you our age difference doesn't bother me."

"It was the things you were willing to give up that made me feel guilty." He took a step closer to her.

"But I told you-"

"I know." He nodded. "And I believe you. I thought as long as we both know what we want, or don't want, than who cares what other people think."

"So what changed your mind so fast?" Bella held her breath.

"I heard you and Alice talking over the phone," he admitted.

"What?" Bella stared at him, confused by what he said. "When were you on the phone when I was talking to Alice?"

"The night I ended things." He waited for her reaction, but her mind was completely blank. "When I talked to you that night I had called a few hours before."

"No," Bella said searching her memory. "The only calls I received that night were from you and an unknown number that I ignored."

"You must have hit 'talk' by mistake."

"No," she insisted. She hurried passed him and grabbed her cell off the coffee table. She quickly searched through the missed calls, desperate to prove him wrong.

_What the hell?_

There it was. The unknown i.d. showed the call had lasted ten minutes.

_Oh my God!_

She looked up at him, mortified that he'd been on the other end. How much had he heard?

"You heard everything?" she chocked out.

"I'm not sure," he answered awkwardly. "I stopped listening when you accused Alice of her wanting you to follow her around New York."

Bella thought back and sighed with relief. He hadn't heard Alice say she was in love with him. That would have made everything so much worse if he'd known that and still broke up with her.

"Where were you calling form?" She had his cell programmed in her contacts and he never called her from the hotel.

"The hospital. I just wanted to hear your voice and I didn't care where I was or what I was doing I needed to hear you," he said.

"And you stayed on the other end just listening?"

"I don't usually eavesdrop on people, Isabella," he assured her quickly. "I was going to hang up and call again from my cell, but then I heard the two of you arguing about us."

"And that conversation changed the way you felt about me?" She couldn't believe it.

"Not about you. About us."

"But why would that make you change your mind?" she asked still not understanding.

"Because she voiced every concern I had," Carlisle explained. "If others were worried about you wasting your life by being with me, maybe it was wrong after all. Who am I to hold you back when you could have so much more?"

"Who are you to decide that for me?" she cried feeling frustrated.

"I just felt you deserved better," he said softly.

"Better than you?" _Was he crazy? _"Carlisle, it doesn't get better than you."

He was suddenly in front of her, his hands cupping her face, beaming down at her. She closed her eyes and nuzzled her skin closer to his palms. She'd missed his touch so much more than she ever thought possible.

"I was stupid, Isabella," he said softly. She opened her eyes and looked at him. "I wanted to protect you and save you from any regret you may have in the future, but that's what life is!" he cried. "You follow your hear and sometimes it works out and other times it doesn't, but in the end as long as you know it was worth it that's all that matters. I can't imagine my life without you in it."

The tears Bella had been holding back finally broke free. She lifted her hands to her face and covered Carlisle's hands with hers.

"If someone had told me two weeks ago that I'd be feeling this for someone I've known a handful of days I would have laughed in their face." He smiled. "You've brought out a part of me I didn't know I had. Both sexually and emotionally. I've known women ten times as long as you and never felt a quarter of what I feel for you towards them. None of them have pushed me sexually like you have either. I've never felt that need-you-now urge with anyone except you." His green eyes shone with excitement as he stared into her brown ones. "I love you, Isabella."

Bella's heart pounded in her chest and the butterflies in her stomach made her feel faint. If he hadn't been holding onto her she would have melted into a puddle at his feet.

_He loved her!_

This glorious wonderful man in front of her loved her! He could have anyone and yet he wanted her. Carlisle Cullen was in love with her!

She blinked away the tears that were blinding her and saw he was staring at her, waiting for some kind of response other than her weeping.

"I love you, too," she whispered smiling so wide it hurt.

He wrapped his arms around her, crushing her to his chest and claimed her mouth with his. Bella snaked her fingers through his hair, never having taken the time to feel the soft texture of the short strands, but loving how they felt between her fingers.

He scooped her up bride style and carried her upstairs. Gently he laid her on the bed, crawling next to her. He softly brushed the hair from her face and kissed her again. He dropped one hand to her shoulder, trailing his fingers down her arm and rested his hand on her stomach.

Bella quivered beneath his touch. His skin felt hot on hers, his touch branding her.

Carlisle moved his mouth to her ear, flicking the lobe with his tongue and then tracing the outer shell. He snapped the button open on her jeans and pulled down the zipper. Slipping his hand inside, he cupped her through her panties.

"Mmm," Bella moaned. "Please, just take them off, Carlisle."

"I can do better than that," he murmured.

He tugged her shirt over her head and kissed his way down between the valley of her breasts. Her nipples pebbled against her bra, aching to be touched. His mouth moved lower, licking a circle around her bellybutton before dipping inside.

"Oh!" Bella gasped. Moisture pooled between her legs as she anticipated where his mouth would wonder to next.

He grabbed the waistband of her jeans and pulled them down. Kneeling by her feet now, he wrapped his hand around her ankle and lifted it to his lips. Bella shivered as he brushed her skin with mouth. He kissed his way up her leg, nipping at the skin on her thigh.

"Carlisle," she sighed flushed from his teasing.

He hooked his fingers into her panties and slowly lowered them down her legs, exposing her to him. His breathing hitche as his eyes roamed over his body laid out before him like an offering.

"You're so damn beautiful," he told her again. "How big of a fool was I to even consider letting you go?" He slipped his hands under her bottom and leaned in closer to her, saying, "Watch me."

Bella watched as he dipped his head between her legs and cried out as his tongue lapped at her juices, licking along her folds, before dipping into her wet center.

"Oh God!" she cried spreading her legs wider for him.

He gently nipped his way to her clit, flicking the hard nub with his tongue. Once. Twice. Harder. Faster.

"Oh….yes!" Bella panted.

As his tongue assaulted her pleasure button, he took one hand away from beneath her ass and filled her with two fingers. Her muscles clamped around his digits instantly.

"Carlisle! I'm coming!" she cried lifting her hips to feel more of him. Her body shuddered with each wave of release, making it hard for her to catch her breath.

Carlisle moved away from her, but before she had a chance to feel empty he'd torn his clothes off and was between her legs again. The head of his cock brushed her sensitive opening as he leaned over her so he could press his mouth to hers. She tasted herself on his tongue and was surprised by how much it aroused her.

In one smooth thrust he was buried deep inside her.

"Isabella," he groaned thrusting his hips again. "You feel so good. So fucking good."

"You, too. Oh!" she cried as he rotated his hips. "Yes!"

He braced himself on his hands and began pumping his cock into her hard. The muscles in his back rippled beneath her hands as she clung to him.

"Isa-bella," he grunted with each thrust. "Tell me," he demanded. "Tell me!"

"I love you!" She grasped his shoulders wanting him closer. "I love you, Carlisle!"

He groaned and slammed into her causing her to come again, this time around his pulsing length. He pulled out of her as he came, soaking her folds in his release. Bella shivered as she felt his warm seed coat her. Nothing had ever felt more erotic. More arousing.

He draped his arm around her and pulled her close. He nuzzled her neck, breathing in the smell of her shampoo.

"I don't want to hide anymore," he said after a few moments of just listening to each other breathe. "I don't care who knows. I don't care what they think."

"You want to give this a real shot?" Bella asked her heart soaring.

"Yes. It might be a little difficult with the distance, but we can figure something out. We have to figure something out."

"You're not concerned about Charlie shooting you?" she teased.

Carlisle laughed. "I don't think he'll be as opposed to the idea as you may think."

"Why?" She looked at him and saw he was grinning. "What do you know?"

"We don't have to worry about Charlie," he assured her softly pecking her lips. "It could be…interesting to tell Edward, though."

The wings on Bella's heart suddenly disappeared and it dropped to her stomach. A lump rose in her throat making it hard to swallow.

This was it. She had to tell him.

"Carlisle, I have to tell you something," she said forcing the words out.

"Okay."

She opened her mouth, but couldn't get the words out. Her throat felt like it was closing up on her and she started to shake.

"Isabella?" Carlisle shot up and quickly grabbed a blanket wrapping it around her. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to his chest. The sound of his heart's steady rhythm calmed her and she inhaled deeply.

"Are you okay?" he asked rubbing her back.

"No. I…Carlisle," she stammered.

"Baby, what's wrong? You're starting to scare me," he said concern filling his voice.

"Edward knows," she whispered.

His hands stilled.

"Knows about us?" he asked quietly. Bella nodded. "How?"

"He saw us outside the restaurant the first night he was here."

"He's known this entire time?" Carlisle exclaimed, shocked. "Why didn't he say anything?"

"He-" Bella stopped.

If she told Carlisle he wanted to sleep with her as payback what would that do? Could he ever forgive Edward? Would he hate him? No, Carlisle could never hate his own son. But, would it make an even bigger rift between the two?

Bella had possibly already caused enough damage; she didn't want to chance it.

"I don't know why he didn't say anything," she lied. She was glad Carlisle wasn't looking directly at her.

"It doesn't make any sense," he muttered. "Is that why he left?"

"I don't know. It may have had something to do with it, but…there's more."

He gently pulled her away from his chest and looked at her. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she gazed into his confused face.

"What more? Sweetheart, why are you crying?"

"Oh, Carlisle," she sobbed. "Edward and I got into an argument and he was saying some really horrible things. Not just about me, but about you as well, and I couldn't take it anymore. He was so mean to you, treating you like garbage that I just snapped."

Something unreadable flickered in Carlisle's eyes as he looked at her. His hold on her arms loosened.

"Isabella, please tell me you didn't," he said hoarsely.

"I'm sorry!" Bella cried. "The truth was out before I could stop it."

Carlisle dropped his hands from her completely and stood up. He grabbed his underwear off the floor and yanked them on.

"How could you?" he accused as he grabbed his pants. "How could you tell him when I practically begged you not to?"

"I know and I'm sorry," she apologized watching him dress. Panic filled her chest. He couldn't leave!

"You're sorry?" He closed his eyes and rubbed his hand over his forehead roughly. "You've just destroyed his life and you're sorry?"

Bella flinched at his words.

"I didn't destroy his life," she said defending herself. "I know it wasn't my place to tell him and I was wrong to do so, but I didn't destroy anything but the lies you told."

"Those lies _are_ his life!"

"What kind of life is that?" she cried back. "Don't you think he had a right to know?"

"Yes, but when was up to me," he scolded.

"I know I overstepped my boundaries," Bella agreed. "It wasn't like I planned to tell him. It was an accident."

"An accident," Carlisle mumbled shaking his head in an irritated way.

"Maybe now that it's out you two can finally move on," she said softly trying to get him to see the good side of this.

He snorted. "So, you think you've done us a favour?"

"I never said that. I know he should have never found out like this, but-"

"But you couldn't keep your mouth shut!" he accused.

Bella bit her lip and looked away. Silence filled the room for what seemed like forever. She wiped the tears off her cheeks and refused to look at him.

"I'm sorry," he sighed after a few minutes. "Isabella, this is hard for me to wrap my head around."

She nodded, still not looking at him.

"What was the argument about?" he asked after a few more minutes of awkward silence.

"What?" She looked at him.

"You said you told him in the heat of the moment because of things he said," Carlisle reminded her. "Why did you start fighting in the first place?"

_Oh God!_

She wasn't prepared to tell him about that. How was she supposed to tell him that she'd thrown herself at Edward and he'd rejected her?

"Um…." She tried stalling, tried thinking of some way to spin this so it didn't sound as bad as it really was. Deep down though, she knew the worst was yet to come.

"What?" He looked like he was just as anxious as she felt.

"I was hurt," she tried to explain. "You had broken things off and no matter what I did to get you to talk to me you wouldn't. And then I started to feel angry about it all. I had some wine…a lot of wine," she mumbled softly. She looked up at Carlisle and he looked as if he was holding his breath. "Edward came home and stayed with me. Every time I looked at him all I saw was your eyes and all I could think about was your rejection."

"Did you…." All colour drained from his face. "Did you sleep with Edward?"

Bella shook her head. "I didn't want to feel anything. I just wanted to be distracted from the pain I felt," she whispered. "I turned to Edward."

"So you did." His voice had turned so cold she didn't recognize it.

"No." She shook her head quickly. "He stopped it from happening." She glanced at him, but the look on his face made her shift her eyes away.

"Are you saying you would have if he hadn't stopped it?" he asked slowly, his voice so low she could barely hear him.

"I don't know," she whimpered. "Maybe…yes." She looked back at him. "You said you didn't want me!" she cried.

"I never said I didn't want you," he shouted making her jump.

The only time she's ever heard him raise his voice was at Esme outside the restaurant when she threatened to tell Edward the truth. But even then it wasn't like this. He hadn't shouted at Esme like he'd just shouted at her. With Esme it was more of a warning to back off….now it was nothing but pure anger.

Bella wasn't afraid like she was last night with Edward. She knew Carlisle would never hurt her. Not that Edward would have, but he was so unpredictable with his moods she didn't know what to expect. Carlisle was always so calm about everything, even when Edward was acting his worst towards him. To know that she made him feel like this, to know that she caused the pain that was on his face right now, was far worse than anything he could do to her.

"That's what it felt like," she replied faintly.

"So, you decide to heal your broken heart by sleeping with my son?" he cried.

"No." Bella shook her head. "I didn't want to."

"Are you saying he tried to force you?"

"No! My mind was screaming that it was wrong the entire time. I didn't want to, but…" She looked at Carlisle helplessly needing him to understand.

"But you would have to be able to forget everything just for a minute," he finished her sentence for her, his voice dripping with disdain.

She wanted to deny it, but couldn't. Tears dripped down her chin as she nodded. "I'm so sorry, Carlisle."

Ignoring her, he pulled his shirt on.

"Please," she begged. "Please, don't go. We can-"

"We can what?" he barked. "We can work it out? We can forget the whole thing? Move on and pretend you weren't going to fuck my son?"

Bella cringed at his vulgar choice of words. She'd only heard him curse while being intimate with her. Hearing it during those times had turned her on. Hearing it now made her feel cheap.

"We can try," she whispered.

"How can I try?" he asked bewildered. "Tell me how I can try when all I see now when I look at you is an image of you all over Edward."

"It wasn't like that," she insisted.

"Then what was it like?" he yelled. "Make me understand! Make me see how this is okay!"

"You ended it!" she threw back at him. "I thought there was nothing left between us!"

"My son!" he screamed his face turning a red. "You almost had sex with my own son, Bella. How do I move on from that?"

Bella felt like he'd slapped her.

_Bella. He__'__d called her Bella._

That was worse than anything else he could ever say. She was his Isabella. Bella made her like everyone else to him.

"I love you." She looked at him with pleading eyes. "I love you," she repeated.

His face crumpled before her eyes as he watched her.

"That I don't question," he said sadly, his eyes shining. "And that's what makes it so much harder to walk away."

Sobs shook her body as she watched him walk out of the room and heard the front door slam behind him.

If there was anything worse than him breaking her heart, it was her breaking his.

_CPOV_

He couldn't get away from the house fast enough. His heart felt like it had been ripped from his chest and he was left with nothing but a gaping hole.

He got into his car and sped out of the driveway, kicking up dirt with his tires as he sped away. His grip on the steering wheel was so tight his knuckles turned white and screamed in protest.

He raced down the highway, daring law enforcement to catch sight of him and give chase. He knew it was reckless. He knew far better than anyone as a doctor what danger he was putting himself in. He didn't care.

He did lift his foot off the gas pedal some when he thought of the other drivers he was putting in harms way because of his rage. He'd taken an oath, sworn to protect those around him. He lived by it, not only while working, but also in his personal life. It was that need to protect that led to this mess with Edward.

He couldn't believe she'd told him! He thought he could trust her to keep it to herself. Did she not stop to think what this would do to his and Edward's relationship? Didn't she care that she may have just ruined any chance he had to fix things with his son?

_Had she?_

It was that part of his brain, that little voice, in the back of his mind that asked the question. It was that little voice that saw the good in what she did. It was that little voice that was _grateful _to her for telling Edward. It was that little voice that he wanted to shut the fuck up.

Yes, she'd crossed a line. However angry she might have been it gave her no right to do so. But she opened a door for him and Edward that he may have very well kept closed forever. If this helped them, if Edward stopped seeing him as the enemy, how could he blame her? If this eventually brought him close to his son he should be down on his knees thanking her.

And he would have. He could have forgiven her for this because he loved her. But all that was tainted by her advances toward Edward. How could she justify sleeping with his son? It would have hurt being anyone, but being his son wasn't just unforgivable; it was wrong.

_You have only yourself to blame. What did you think was going to happen? She was feeling rejected and confused and he was there to comfort her. _

There was a difference between being comforted and being fucked to feel better. Especially by his own blood.

And what part did Edward have in all this? Was he an innocent bystander, or was it more complicated than that? He'd known about them for a week and hadn't said a word. He'd even heard Edward flirting with her at times. If he'd known, why had he done it?

And if he knew the truth about Kate why hadn't he called yet? Where was he? What was he doing? What was he _thinking_? Carlisle could only imagine what he was feeling finding out his past had been a lie.

Once in Seattle, Carlisle drove to the hotel as fast as traffic allowed. He hurried to the elevator not stopping at the front desk like he usually did to check for messages.

Inside his room he yanked off his clothes and jumped in the shower half hoping the hot water would burn away tonight's events. He scrubbed at his body with a vengeance, taking his anger out on his skin until it looked raw and burned from the water.

He got out and dried himself off, pulling on a pair of track pants and a t-shirt. It was late, but he needed to feel the pounding of cement beneath his feet.

As he grabbed his beeper from his pants and clipped it to his track suit, he spied a book peaking out from his briefcase. He pulled it out and felt the hole in his chest grow bigger.

The words _University of Washington_ stared back at him, taunting him with all the thoughts that had been on his mind when he'd stopped to pick the book up from the school. He felt like such an idiot.

He threw the book in the trash and grabbed his cell. He punched in the familiar number and wasn't surprised when it went to voicemail.

"Edward, its dad. We need to talk."

**A/N: So, everyone keeps asking how many chapters this fic will have, and I think I finally have an idea. 18. Yep, that means only 3 more, unless I write an ****Epilogue. I won't know until the last chapter is finished. **

**I can tell you that an entire chapter will be from CPOV very shortly. I know I've never done that, but with everything that's happened I think we need a look in his head again, don't you think?**

**Now leave Bella and Carlisle some love!**


	16. Words of Wisdom

_**So two weeks isn't that bad for an update right. I admit I've had this chapter done for awhile, but I was trying to finish a one shot for a challenge over on another board so this got put on the back burner.**_

_**Nothing has changed. SM still owns Twilight and I'm still having dirty thoughts of Peter and his peter.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

Chapter 16: Words of Wisdom

Alice crawled in next to her and draped an arm over Bella's stomach in a comforting manner.

"I changed the sheets in Charlie and Esme's bed and cleaned up downstairs," Alice told her. "They should be home soon."

"Thanks," Bella managed to mumble.

She'd been numb since Carlisle had walked out yesterday. The look on his face when she'd told him about Edward would be forever branded in her mind. His face was pale, almost sickly looking, his eyes glazed over with a mix of confusion and pain. Pain that she'd caused. His usual calm exterior had been crushed and replaced by anger she had never thought him capable of if she hadn't seen it herself.

Not that she blamed him. She'd been where he was, feeling betrayed by the person you loved. It was a feeling she wouldn't wish on her worst enemy. And yet she'd caused it for the man she loved.

Alice had found her crouched in a ball in the shower yesterday. She didn't remember leaving the bedroom. She had no clue how she'd ended up in the shower. And if it hadn't been for Alice helping her dry off and dress she'd probably still be in there.

She'd spent the rest of the night in her old room, unable to even look at the other room without feeling sick.

"You're going to have to get up sooner or later, Bella," Alice said.

"Uh huh."

They laid in silence for a few minutes.

"So, I took Jasper to the airport this morning. If you can even call what you have here an airport," she muttered.

Right. Jasper had to make other arrangements to get home since Edward was MIA. Alice had volunteered to drive him to the Forks airport so he could fly home. She knew it had to be hard for Alice to say goodbye to him and she knew she should ask how she was, but she couldn't put the words together.

Some friend she was.

"He said he'd keep in touch," Alice continued. "He's a pretty great guy. Maybe we can hang out when I'm in New York. You know, if he's not seeing someone by then," she added quickly. She looked at Bella and sighed. "Don't take this the wrong way, but you look like shit."

_Wow. How could someone take that the wrong way?_

She probably did though. Her eyes were swollen and red from crying all night. Her throat felt raw and her head was pounding. She just wanted to close her eyes and sleep this nightmare away and when she woke up it would be Wednesday and she'd be in Seattle next to Carlisle before any of this happened.

That wasn't too much to ask, right?

"Did Jasper hear from Edward before he left?" Bella asked softly.

"Nope." Alice shrugged. "He left him a message and told him he was going home. Kind of inconsiderate of Edward to leave his friend stranded, don't you think?"

"What did Jasper think?" Bella asked instead of voicing her opinion.

"He was cool about it." Alice sat up, folding her legs under her. "Do you think he's called Carlisle yet?"

"I hope so."

"Did you call Carlisle?" Alice questioned. She shook her head "Why not?"

"He made it pretty clear how he felt, Alice." Bella winced.

"So what? You're just going to give up? It's over?"

"What else can I do, Alice?"

"You could fight for what you want."

Bella blinked at her. "Where is this coming from? You were the one who thought this was all a bad idea."

"That was before he said he loves you!" Alice cried smiling. "He loves you, Bella. That means something."

"Meant something," Bella corrected. "I was going to sleep with his son, remember? Because I don't think that's something he'll ever forget."

"You'll never know unless you try," Alice said softly.

"Maybe you were right all along," Bella sighed sadly.

"I wasn't! I know it's a rare thing, but I was wrong."

Bella smiled. "It's not as rare as you think," she teased.

"Things will work out," Alice declared after a moment's silence. "I know they will."

Bella sighed again and shook her head.

"C'mon, get up and go make yourself somewhat presentable before your folks get back." Alice nudged her legs. "I'll go make some coffee."

Bella wasn't sure her limbs would move even if she wanted them to. Her entire body felt like Jell-O. Alice got up and grabbed her hands when she made no effort to get up and pulled her until she was sitting.

Bella held onto her hands and looked up at her. "Thank you, Alice. I know we both can be a pain in each other's ass, but I'd be lost without you."

Alice bent down and hugged her. "Me, too."

She left and Bella followed a few minutes later not bothering to look through her makeup bag for anything to cover up her puffy eyes. Charlie and Esme would know soon enough anyway.

The smell of coffee greeted her as she descended the stairs. She followed her nose to the kitchen and flopped down in a chair. Alice placed a mug in front of her and frowned.

"I thought you were going to fix yourself up."

"It's just my dad and Esme coming home," Bella muttered.

"Do you really want them asking questions?"

"They'll find out sooner or later, Alice."

As if on cue they heard a car pull into the driveway. Alice jumped up and darted to the kitchen window.

"It's Charlie." She looked over her shoulder at Bella. "Last chance to greet them not looking like a train wreck."

Bella rolled her eyes, but managed a smile.

Charlie walked in looking more tan than Bella had ever seen him. Actually, she wasn't sure Charlie had ever been tan before.

"Hey, Bells, Alice." He beamed and dropped his suitcase by the door.

"Hey, Dad," Bella said trying to sound cheerful. "How was Mexico?"

"It was great, but I gotta say, it's nice to be back home."

Esme came in and set her bag next to Charlie's.

"Hello, girls." She smiled at Alice and looked at Bella. Her expression immediately turned to concern. Bella shifted her eyes away.

"Esme will have to show you the pictures," Charlie said picking up both bags. "I hate to leave so soon, but I should really check on things at the station."

"I'm surprised you restrained yourself from calling everyday while away," Esme teased him.

He smiled and pecked the top of her head before going upstairs. The second Charlie was out of sight, Esme crossed the room and wrapped her arms around Bella. Bella sat there, too surprised to react. Esme pulled back and sat next to her.

"Edward called me," she explained.

"God, Esme, I'm so sorry," Bella moaned. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen and I didn't want to disturb you on your honeymoon-"

"Never mind that, Bella." Esme waved a dismissing hand. "This is my family. What happened?"

"What did Edward tell you?" she asked carefully.

"He was angry which surprised me because Edward has never been upset when talking to me. He asked me if Carlisle had deceived him about his mother." Esme looked at Bella. "When I asked him who told him he said you did." Bella nodded. "I don't know why I thought Carlisle may have come to his senses and told him himself."

"I didn't plan on telling him, Esme," Bella explained quickly. "We got into an argument and he kept going on about how horrible Carlisle was and I just couldn't listen to it anymore."

"He should have been told a long time ago," Esme muttered.

"It wasn't my place to tell him."

"No, it wasn't," Esme agreed. "But I can't say I'm unhappy you did." She reached for Bella's hand and smiled softly at her. "You've opened a very large wound, Bella, but I don't for one minute think you did it to hurt Edward."

Bella shook her head and murmured, "I didn't."

"I've been after Carlisle for years to tell him. When he called me I could have continued to lie and told him I had no idea what you were talking about, but I was relieved that it was out," Esme admitted.

"You weren't mad at me?"

"Not in the least. It may take some time, but I think it's all for the best. You did something I'm not sure Carlisle ever would have."

"Where's Edward now?" Alice asking speaking for the first time as she sat with them.

Esme looked at her and frowned. "He didn't come back here?"

"We haven't seen him since Friday," Alice said looking at Bella.

"And he hadn't gone to see Carlisle as of yesterday," Bella added.

"He called me Friday night," Esme told them.

"Jasper tried calling him too and he didn't answer."

"Where is Jasper?" Esme asked noticing for the first time he wasn't around.

"He had to go home. I drove him to the airport this morning," Alice said.

Bella's stomach rolled as she asked, "You don't think he's hurt, do you?"

"I doubt it. Someone would have been informed by now," Esme tried to assure her, but didn't sound too convincing.

"Did you tell him anything about his mother, Esme?" Alice asked.

"Not really." She thought. "He did have a couple of questions that I answered."

"Like what?"

"Her name and the school she taught at when Carlisle met her," Esme said.

"Wouldn't he already know that? I mean, I know which schools my parents went to," Alice said.

"Carlisle switched schools after Edward was born." Bella suddenly remembered.

"That's right." Esme nodded and looked at Alice. "Why do you ask?"

"Is it possible he's gone to look for her?" Alice asked looking back and forth between the other two women.

"Why would he do that?" Bella wondered.

"To get her side of the story," Alice suggested. "Wouldn't you want to know if it were you?"

Esme sighed and shook her heard, clasping her hands together.

"I hope he didn't," she said softly. "I think that will cause him more pain than closure."

"Maybe that's what he needs," Bella thought. "Maybe he needs to see just how great Carlisle has been to him."

"Speaking of which-"

"Okay, I'm off," Charlie said coming into the kitchen. "I shouldn't be too long."

"Please, try not to be. It's Bella and Alice's last night with us," she told him smiling. Charlie nodded and left. Esme turned back to Bella. "What did he do, Bella?"

Bella didn't have to ask to know who she was talking about. She swallowed, not sure she could tell Esme everything that had happened without breaking down again.

"I went to Seattle Tuesday night and things were great," Bella started. "I came home the next day and he called that night and broke things off."

"What was his excuse?" Esme asked.

Bella glanced at Alice. "He overheard a conversation between Alice and me." She explained the mistake with the phone call and then told Esme about him coming to see her yesterday. "When he found out I'd told Edward he was angry, but then I told him…"

"Told him what?" Esme asked gently.

It was bad enough she had to explain it to Carlisle. Now she was going to have to tell her stepmother about it, too. How much humiliation did she have to live through?

"I was upset and hurt from Carlisle's rejection and just didn't want to think or feel anything anymore." She shifted her eyes away, looking at the table as shame filled her once again. "I'd had some wine and turned to Edward for…comfort." She peeked at Esme and saw her eyes widen in surprise. "We didn't do anything," Bella assured her quickly. "Edward stopped it before it got out of hand."

"Edward stopped it?" Even Esme sounded surprised at that.

Bella nodded. "He'd known about Carlisle and I all along."

"And he only wanted to hook up with Bella as a way to stick it to his dad," Alice piped up.

Bella glared at Alice as Esme's mouth dropped open with shock.

"Why would he do that?" she cried.

"You know he blamed Carlisle for a lot of things. I think he was just confused and wanted to hurt him the way he'd been hurting for years," Bella said softly.

"Did you tell Carlisle that?" Esme asked.

"I didn't tell him that Edward wanted to sleep with me as payback, no. I didn't know how he'd react to Edward about that. I didn't want to cause any more trouble," Bella mumbled.

"You protected Edward."

"I protected them both."

"So, when you told Carlisle that you and Edward-" she waved her hand instead of saying the words, "what did he say?"

"He was understandably furious. He…he left."

"But he loves her!" Alice cried. "That has to mean something."

Esme looked at Bella, surprise filling her face once again.

"He told you he loves you?" She beamed.

"I'm pretty sure the correct term would be 'loved'," Bella said sadly.

"Carlisle can be stubborn," Esme said, "but he's not the type of person who easily falls in and out of love. If he said he loves you, trust me, Bella, he loves you."

Tears stung Bella's eyes for the millionth time in a handful of days.

"But I've screwed everything up," she whimpered.

"Or you've just made everything right," Esme told her squeezing her hand. "If this finally brings Carlisle closer with Edward, do you think he wouldn't forgive you?"

"Maybe for telling him," Bella said. "But for throwing myself at his son?"

Esme looked at Alice and back at Bella, pressing her lips together. Any hope that had been inside Bella vanished when Esme had no words to reassure her.

**********

The next morning as Bella was packing the last of her things, Charlie knocked on her bedroom door. Her dad very rarely came into her room; it was almost strange to see him standing amongst her childhood memories.

He looked uncomfortable as he shoved his hands in his pockets and looked around the room before his eyes finally landed on his daughter.

"I remember the day your mother told me she was pregnant like it was yesterday," he suddenly said.

Bella stared at him, speechless. Charlie never talked about the past with Renee, even before the divorce. He rarely spoke about his own childhood and what Bella did know came from her mother, who'd been told by his mother. Charlie just wasn't the type to reminisce. He preferred to focus on the future rather than the past.

So when she heard him speak like this she held her breath, afraid he might stop if he was distracted by the slightest sound.

"When you were born and the doctor placed you in my arms," he continued, "I was afraid I'd break you." He smiled at Bella. "You were so small and pink." Bella smiled and blinked back tears. "You were so innocent," he said softly. "I promised you then that I wouldn't let anything or anyone hurt you."

"Dad…" Bella was afraid to speak in case he stopped talking, but she was even more worried of where he was going with this.

"I'm afraid I've let you down, Bells," he said sadly.

"Dad, you haven't."

"Yes, I have. And not once, but twice."

"Twice?" She looked at him confused.

"Last year when your mother called and told me you were going through a rough time because of your break up with James, I felt helpless. I was so far away and couldn't do anything to make my little girl feel better."

"That was a long time ago. At least it feels like a long time ago," she mumbled. "I feel like a totally different person than I was then."

"Still, it was my job to protect you from that kind of pain."

"You didn't even meet James," Bella reminded him. "I was with him every day for five years and didn't see what he was really like. Besides," she said, "that kind of pain helps us grow."

"I may not have known James, but I do know Carlisle."

Bella inhaled so quickly it sounded like a gasp. Maybe it was a gasp. Deep down she knew Charlie knew, but she never expected him to come right out and confront her with it. He never involved himself in her personal life.

"I don't…" The familiar line, 'I don't know what you're talking about' died on her lips. The lie had become such a big part of her life the last two weeks it was a natural response to everything. But this was her father. A man who was obviously out of his comfort zone, but was still standing in front of her trying to help. "I don't know what to say," she finally said looking at him awkwardly.

"You don't have to say anything." He shrugged. "Esme's filled me in on what happened. I'm not concerned about what you've done," he told her.

"You're not?"

"My concern is what he's done to you."

"Carlisle hasn't done anything to me, Dad," Bella said. "He was amazing and an all around stand up guy to me. He treated me better than anyone I've ever been with. He made me feel good about myself for the first time in a long time."

"And yet here you are broken hearted again," Charlie said.

Bella shook her head. "That's not his fault."

"You know, I could almost believe that considering what he told me on the way to the wedding, but all I see is my little girl in pain."

"What?" Bella jerked her head up and looked at him. "What are you talking about?"

Charlie sighed, not looking at all happy with having to tell her. "Carlisle told me that you two had been sneaking around," he admitted.

"He what?" Bella cried as pink filled her cheeks.

"I guess he figured I wouldn't risk being late to my own wedding by killing him." Charlie grinned.

"Why would he tell you?"

"He said he respected me as a man and a friend too much to keep….you know," Charlie said all of a sudden blushing and looking even more awkward than Bella felt. "It doesn't matter the exact words. The bottom line is he told me that he had genuine feelings for you. He said he couldn't explain it, but it almost felt like he was falling in love with you."

_Carlisle had loved her then?_

"I wasn't very enthusiastic about it at first. I mean, the man is only a few years younger than me. And love at first sight?" Charlie snorted. "It sounded like a line he hoped I'd easily swallow so he wouldn't feel guilty doing….what he was doing," Charlie finished quickly.

If Bella hadn't been so lost in her own thoughts she would have been utterly mortified to be having this conversation with her father.

"What changed your mind?" she asked.

"The way he looked at you when you were walking down the aisle." Charlie lifted a shoulder and shook his head. "It was a look of a man in love if I'd ever seen one. And the way he continued to look at you the rest of the night."

Bella wiped at the tears that ran down her cheeks.

"It kills me to see you like this." Charlie shook his head. "Maybe if I had been more involved in your life, more of a presence, you wouldn't be drawn to these men."

"This isn't your fault, Dad," Bella said. "And it's not Carlisle's either. There's nothing wrong with him as a man. I did this. I've messed up big time, Dad," she whispered.

"Awe, Bells." He walked over to her and hugged her tightly. "Give it some time."

"What if he doesn't forgive me?" she cried into his chest.

"Well, I'm no longer distracted by a wedding," he said implying a threat without saying the words.

Bella laughed, wiping her nose with her sleeve.

"I love you, Dad."

"I love you, too." He pulled out of her embrace and said, "Don't stay away so long next time, kid. Esme and I love having you here."

"I promise."

Bella watched him leave and then sank down on her bed. Carlisle had talked to Charlie about them? Why hadn't he said anything? What had he been thinking coming out about what they were doing to Charlie of all people?

And if Charlie knew, why had it been such a big deal to keep it all a secret? Had he really been worried about Edward's reaction?

But the fact that he'd actually told Charlie - not only her father, but also the man who legally carried a gun and knew all the forest surrounding Forks and La Push - spoke volumes of how much he really cared, right?

Or had cared, anyway.

"C'mon, Bella," Alice called from the doorway. "I want to get in as many hours as we can."

"Right." Bella stood and grabbed her suitcase.

At the door, she turned back and looked around the room. Her eyes fell on the bed and images of Carlisle filled her mind. There was no longer a room in the house that wouldn't remind her of him from now on. Blinking away tears, she shut the door and hurried after Alice.

Charlie put their bags in the trunk as they said their goodbye's to Esme.

"Thank you for everything," Bella told her.

"Thank _you _for everything," Esme said. "Come home soon."

Two weeks ago 'home' would have been the last word she'd use to describe Forks, but suddenly it fit again.

She hugged her father one last time and got into the car. She waved at her dad and Esme standing hand in hand on the porch and backed out of the driveway.

"Let me know when you get tired," Alice said and settled back in her seat with a book.

"Wow." Bella cast a glance at the book. "You're going to be a lot of company, aren't you?"

"Jasper gave it to me to read." Alice smiled and looked at the cover before resuming her reading.

"Jasper?"

"Yeah, it's his favourite book."

"He just gave you his favourite book?"

"Well…yeah." She looked up. "Why?"

Bella smiled. "Nothing."

"What?"

"I don't think I'm the only one that got in over my head this week," Bella answered.

"Don't be ridiculous," Alice muttered more to herself than Bella. "I don't fall in love in a blink of an eye."

Bella pressed her lips together to keep from responding. The last thing she needed was to start an argument with Alice on a two day drive back to Phoenix.

They drove for twelve hours, chit chatting here and there, but mostly rode in silence. Alice's nose in the book and Bella listening to music to keep her mind from wondering. They stopped at a motel for the night and took off early the next morning with Alice driving this time, giving Bella's mind too much free time to think.

Had anyone heard from Edward yet? Had he gone to see Carlisle? Were things even worse between them now than it had been?

_Carlisle. _

Her chest ached just to think his name. She foolishly thought by going back to Phoenix and having distance between them it would help loosen the tight fist that was gripping her heart. But it just got worse. She longed to be with him now more than before.

Something landed on her lap, startling her out of her thoughts. She looked down and saw it was Jasper's book.

"Read," Alice told her. "It helps."

Bella picked up the book and looked at the cover. She couldn't stop the giggles that burst forth.

"The Fountainhead?"

Alice grinned. "I know, right?"

"This is his favourite book?"

"It's just what you need."

Bella sighed and spread the book open to the first page. She listened to Alice softly hum along with the music for a few minutes, but was soon lost in Howard Roark's complicated life.

"This book isn't half bad," Bella mumbled around a mouthful of ham and cheese a few hours later.

Alice had stopped for gas and grabbed some ready-made sandwiches so they wouldn't have to stop again for lunch.

"Makes you forget about your problems." Bella looked up at her and frowned. "Never mind. Read."

Bella absorbed herself in the book again, becoming so lost she didn't realize they'd entered Phoenix until Alice nudged her.

"What?" Bella asked not looking up from the page.

"We're home."

Bella looked up and frowned. "Already?"

"Don't sound so excited." Alice rolled her eyes. "And don't think next time I'm going to be as nice and let you read the entire time and ignore me for fourteen hours."

"Yeah, that must have sucked for you." Bella grinned at her.

"We fly next time."

"Next time?" Bella raised an eyebrow.

"You think you're the only one welcomed back?" Alice grinned as she expertly navigated her way through the city streets, pulling into her driveway twenty minutes later. "Wanna come in?"

"I think I should get home." Bella handed the book back to her and smiled. "Thank for coming with me."

"I'm always up for a road trip." Alice winked. "Especially if it leads to hot men." Bella winced. "I'm sorry," Alice apologized quickly. "Me and my big mouth."

Bella shrugged. "Can't expect everyone to walk on eggshells, right?" She got out of the car and came around to the driver's side as Alice exited the seat.

"Are you sure you don't want to come in?"

Bella shook her head. "It's late."

"Okay." Alice enveloped her in a one arm hug. "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"'Kay." Bella forced a smile and quickly got in the car.

She was home in minutes, only living a few blocks away from Alice. The living room light shone through the closed curtains, indicating her mom was home. Bella blew out a breath and got out of the car. She grabbed her bags and let herself into the house, calling, "Mom, I'm home."

She dropped her suitcase by the entry way and walked to the living room. Her mom was hunched over the coffee table, glasses perched on the end of her nose, grading papers.

"That would probably be more comfortable at your desk," Bella told her smiling.

Renee looked up returning the smile. "Hey, sweetie." She took her glasses off and tossed them on the stack of papers, patting the cushion next to her. "How was Forks?"

_A combination of the best and worst time of my life. _

"It was good." She sat next to Renee trying to avoid eye contact. "Dad's really happy."

"I'm glad."

Bella knew it wasn't just empty words to keep the peace. Despite everything, neither Charlie nor Renee wished anything but good things for each other.

"So, why aren't you doing this in your office?" Bella asked.

"Online shopping," Renee laughed. "I've become way too addicted to it and if I'm even near a computer I get the itch."

Bella rolled her eyes.

"Oh!" Renee reached for her leather bag and pulled out a paper handing it to Bella. "Here. I thought you might be interested in this." Bella took the paper and saw it was an application for the clinic a few blocks away. "They're looking for a receptionist," Renee said. "You've done some office work and seemed to like it, so I thought you might be interested."

"Oh."

"You've been talking about moving in with Alice, right?" Renee reminded her when she wasn't enthused by the gesture. "The little savings you have won't cover rent for long. You're going to need a steady income."

"Yeah." Bella glanced at her and nodded. "I'll check it out."

"And from what I've seen they have some pretty cute young _single_ doctors working there," she sang.

The fist squeezed Bella's heart so hard she struggled for air for a minute.

"Bella?" Renee touched her shoulder. "Are you alright, sweetie?"

"No." She wiped at her eyes and shook her head. "I'm not alright."

"What's wrong?" Renee's voice was full of motherly concern and alarm.

"I met someone."

"In Forks?"

"Yeah." Bella couldn't help but laugh at the surprise in her mother's voice. "He's…he's really wonderful, Mom."

"Well, that's great, honey. How did you meet?"

Bella took a deep breath and turned to her. "Mom, you've always been really open minded about things and never judgmental-"

"Oh God, please don't tell me he's fresh out of prison," Renee moaned.

"No," Bella laughed.

"Are you pregnant?" Her eyes grew big. "Is that why you're upset?"

"No. Mom, please," Bella sighed. "Could you just listen before you start jumping to conclusions?"

"Okay. This is me being my non-judgemental self. Tell me."

"I met him at dad's." Renee narrowed her eyes. "He's Esme's brother."

"Esme has a brother your age?"

"Not exactly," Bella muttered. "He's a little older."

"How much older?" Renee questioned.

"Forty-one." Bella held her breath.

"Forty-one!" Renee exclaimed her mouth hung open in shock. "Bella, he's only two years younger than I am!"

"He's a pretty cute single doctor," Bella told her using her mother's own words to help smooth the blow.

"I don't care- A doctor?" Renee's curiosity was peaked.

"A surgeon," Bella added.

"Really? In Forks? Is he well known- Bella, that's not the point," Renee backtracked.

"Exactly. The point is he makes me feel alive again and better about myself. That's something I haven't felt in over a year."

"But forty-one, Bella?" Her mother looked at her and shook her head. "He's so much older than you. Don't you see that as a problem?"

"Trust me when I say every concern you have has already been addressed by Esme and Alice. Even dad."

"Your father knows?" she cried. Bella nodded. "And he's okay with it?"

"He wasn't, but Carlisle talked to him and apparently told him how he felt about me. He was honest with dad."

"Carlisle?" Renee bit her lip. "I assume you've been sexually active with this man."

"Mom!" Bella groaned. "That's really none of your business."

"Bella, I'm not naïve enough to believe you're a virgin, but if I'm concerned than I still get to ask questions. Are you being safe?" she pushed.

_Not as safe as you'd probably like._

"Yes."

"Is he married?"

"No! Do you think I'd get involved with a married man?" Bella asked more than a little hurt.

"Of course not. I'm sorry." Renee thought for a second and asked, "Has he ever been married?"

"No," Bella answered.

"Does he have children?"

Bella nodded. "A son. His name is Edward."

"How old?"

"Twenty," Bella sighed.

"Twenty?" Renee looked at her like she had lost her mind. "Bella, what have you gotten yourself into?"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You come home and tell me you're seeing a man in his forties, who has a twenty year old son but has never been married, who's apparently the most wonderful man to grace God's green earth and yet you look like you're going to cry. No, scratch that. You look like you've been crying for weeks." Renee looked at her closely. "What's really going on, Isabella?"

Bella stared at her mom and then started to cry. It was the name. Carlisle had been the last person to call her that.

"Oh, Mom," Bella sobbed. Renee wrapped her arm around her and listened as Bella explained everything from the beginning.

"You've really gotten yourself into a pickle this time, Bella," Renee concluded once Bella had finished.

_A pickle? That's what her mom used to describe this? A pickle?_

"I don't know what to do," Bella whimpered.

"I think you've done all you can do," Renee said.

Bella shook her head. "I can't just forget it and walk away. I love him."

"I know, baby. I can tell," she said gently, taking her hand. "But you can't force him to forgive you."

"But there has to be something I can do!"

"How would you feel if you were in his place?"

Bella sniffed, never having thought about it like that. What would she do?

Could she compare this to what James had done? She hadn't slept with Edward, but she might have if he hadn't put a stop to it. She hadn't been able to forgive James, she never even considered it. Did Carlisle see this the same way as she saw James's infidelity? Did the wound really run that deep?

How could she expect Carlisle to forgive her for putting herself into the position she did with Edward, when it wasn't something she would forgive if it were done to her?

"I think I've lost him," Bella whispered.

"Call him," Renee suggested.

Bella looked at her, confused. "What?"

"Call him one last time. Tell him how you feel, tell him you're sorry, tell him he's not being fair. Whatever. Reach out to him one last time so he knows you haven't, and don't want to, fade away into the background," Renee said. "Own up to your mistakes, but don't let him punish you or make you feel like you should grovel for his forgiveness or be grateful he's given it to you."

"But I would be grateful," Bella said.

"At what price?"

"What do you mean?"

"Is this something that's always going to hang over your head? Something he'd use in the future as a guilt trip? If you two do work it out and you're around Edward will he constantly see things that aren't there? Will simple gestures turn into looks of longing? Will two minutes out of the room together make him accuse you of cheating? Will he ever completely get passed this to see you as Isabella again and not Bella?" Renee questioned asking things Bella hadn't even considered.

Bella didn't have to ask what the difference was. He'd said it himself: Bella was Charlie's daughter. She was _his _Isabella. Could she stand being _just _Bella in his eyes? And if she could, what else would she lose along the way?

"Is it worth putting yourself through all this to only end up as Bella to him? Could you be happy with him knowing he didn't see you the same way anymore?" She looked at her sadly. "Think about it, sweetie." She squeezed her hand and left the room, leaving Bella to her own thoughts.

Was her mom right? Would Carlisle no longer see her as his "perfect" Isabella even if he did forgive her? Did his forgiveness come with a price?

Did she really want to find out?

_**A/N- So, lots for Bella to think about, yes?**_

_**Now, what would you say to an EPOV? I never intended for Edward to have his own voice in this fic, but he's been whispering laides. And when Edward starts to whisper I have to listen. And the more he whispers, the more sense it makes that he gets to speak up. What do you say?**_

_**If you want, check out Cowboy Casanova. I wrote it for the challege over on the Writer's Coffee Shop. Leave some love if you check it out. Pretty please?**_

_**Now off you go and review! And Happy Easter!**_


	17. The Long Road To Healing

_**We've reached over 500 reviews! That may not seem like a lot, but this story got off to a slow start on FF and I'm more than happy to see it hit 500.**_

_**We are very close to the end...and I'm sad. This is a chapter many of you having been waiting for so I'll keep it short and send you on your way.**_

_**I own nothing but the original story line of this fic. Everything else belongs to SM**_

* * *

_**EPOV**_

_What the fuck are you doing here, Cullen?_

Edward shook his head and cursed himself for the hundredth time. He had been sitting in his car for the past two hours watching the University of California, San Diego campus. He'd seen countless students come and go, some more than once. The ones that had noticed him sitting there for this long were starting to give him strange looks, like the small group of girls over to the right of his car.

They were huddled together, peeking at him every few seconds, before ducking their heads together once more and speaking in hushed voices.

He wouldn't be surprised if campus security was on his ass soon.

_Either grow some fucking balls and go in, or get the hell out of here._

Christ, when had he turned into such a pussy?

Yanking his keys from the ignition, he got out of the car and slammed the door.

He heard someone hiss, "Jessica, no!" from behind him. He turned and found one of the clucking hens from the huddled group walking towards him.

She was tall, probably as tall as he was, with a slender build and had what looked like a nice set of tits bursting out of her form fitting tank top. His eyes traveled up legs that went on for days - _bless the genius who'd invented the mini skirt _- over her slender thighs and narrow waist, pausing on those plump mounds before landing on her face.

She stopped dead when she saw him checking her out. She fidgeted, wiping strands of her blonde hair off her face as she stared at him.

He didn't encourage her to continue approaching him. He wasn't in the mood to entertain some wannabe cheerleader this afternoon, but apparently she didn't need encouraging. She smiled at him and practically skipped to his side.

"Hi!" she chirped as she cocked her hip against his car. "I'm Jessica."

He glanced at her group of friends who looked to be holding their breath, their eyes wide as saucers. He smirked and shifted his eyes back to her.

"I'm busy," he said giving her a not so subtle hint her attention wasn't wanted.

"You can't be that busy," she drawled. "You've been sitting out here for a long time." She bit her lip in a way she probably thought was sexy, but made Edward want to roll his eyes. "You're not stalking someone, are you?" she giggled.

"Well, the restraining order said I only had to keep two hundred feet away, so technically I'm not breaking any laws." He smiled knowing what the gesture did to most women. A guy could only be told so many times it was dazzling before he started to believe it.

Jessica's eyes grew as wide as her friends' and she gasped, taking a step back. Edward vaguely wondered if it was from his words or his grin.

"You're joking, right?" she asked in a whisper.

Edward shrugged. "It's really all a big misunderstanding."

She licked her lips and looked back at her friends. When she turned back to him the fear he thought he'd implanted was gone, replaced by curiosity.

"What did you do?" she asked enthusiastically, stepping closer to him again.

_Oh fuck, he'd gone and excited the little twit. _

"I'm not allowed to talk about it," he said feeling annoyed.

"I promise I won't tell anyone!" she promised and took another step closer to him, thrusting her chest out as she did.

"Look, I'm not interested in your feeble attempts at flirting," Edward snapped. "Why don't you be helpful and tell me where I can find Professor Denali's office."

She stepped back as if he'd slapped her and glared at him, grumbling, "Find it yourself, asshole," before spinning around and hurrying back to her friends.

Edward sighed and shook his head. What was with the name calling? These women were going to give him a complex soon.

He stormed into the school, stopping the first person he ran into and asked where he could find Professor Denali.

"Uh, I'm not familiar with him, man."

"Her," Edward corrected.

The stoner looked at him with glazed eyes, making Edward wonder how he'd gotten through middle school much less being excepted to university.

"Right. Her."

"Never mind," Edward muttered. "Do you at least know where the office is?"

"Uh, sure. That way." The guy pointed and scurried away.

"Are you looking for Denali?" Edward turned and nodded at the guy who'd asked the question. "She's up on two. Room two-ten."

"Thanks."

He had no trouble finding the room; what was hard was taking the next step. He leaned against the wall and shut his eyes. He could hear his heart pounding and just hoped it wasn't noticeable to anyone else. He opened his eyes to make sure and saw that no one was paying attention to him. Well, that wasn't true. There were a couple of girls down the hall that were checking him out.

_Enjoy it while it lasts, Cullen. They'd soon call you an asshole or arrogant prick, too._

"_Egotistical. Self absorbed. Arrogant jackass."_

He smiled despite everything that had happened. Bella. Only she could insult him and make him want to come back for more.

Okay, that wasn't true either. Tanya had the ability to pull him back, too. Although, she'd never insulted him like Bella had. Tanya was honest, a straight shooter, but she didn't name call or lose her temper like Bella. They were both very spirited woman, but Tanya had more class to her when she was angry, she filtered what came out of her mouth. Bella didn't filter.

Honestly, he wasn't sure which he preferred. He found both types of women captivating. Not that that meant he was actually interested in Bella that way. He could have been if he hadn't discovered she'd been screwing his father. Any ideas he'd entertained about the two of them quickly vanished after that. He saw one thing and one thing only after that moment. It didn't make sense, even to him, that he felt that kind of need to take Bella away from Carlisle.

All he knew was he felt cheated from having a mother, having a normal family, and he wanted Carlisle to know how that felt. He wanted him to know how much it hurt to be cheated out of something you wanted more than your next breath.

He didn't have to be a mind reader to know that's how his dad felt for Bella. Any idiot could clearly see how hard and fast he'd fallen. That surprised Edward more than any of it. The fact that Carlisle Cullen, the man who had been alone all these years and was married to his career, actually had the ability to love more than his work.

That made Edward wonder four things: why had he stomped on her heart? What had made his father turn his back on the only woman to break through his shell? Was he so ignorant that he thought woman like Bella came along everyday? And why the hell had he told _her_, someone he just met for Christ sakes, the truth about his mother if she hadn't meant anything to him?

_What the fuck was wrong with his father?_

Edward felt the anger rise again as he thought of what Bella had told him. When she threw what she claimed was the truth at him, he wanted to laugh in her face. He had laughed in her face, but it wasn't because he didn't believe her despite what he said. He didn't want to believe her. But everything she asked, especially as to why there was no evidence his mother and father had been together, were things he'd wondered himself many times.

Where were the memories of his parents' past? Why was he never shown the mementos people usually kept to remember an old love? Why didn't his father's friends know anything about his mother?

_Why the fuck hadn't he asked more questions growing up?_

The more Bella told him, the more he wanted to tear something apart. He saw red as lie after lie his father told him flew from her lips. And what had he done? He'd grabbed her. He'd actually put his hands on a woman in a physically hurtful way. He'd heard her terrified wince, but it wasn't until she spoke that he realized what he was doing.

She actually had to tell him he was hurting her.

He really was an asshole.

The first thing he'd done after he'd stormed out of there was call Esme. He didn't care that she was on her honeymoon and that he was probably disturbing the most romantic time she and Charlie had. He just wanted answers.

"_Esme, tell me it's not true," he demanded gruffly as soon as she answered the phone._

"_Edward? What's wrong?" She sounded frantic. "Are you okay?"_

"_Tell me my father didn't knock up a married woman!"_

_He heard her gasp on the other end and then nothing. That said more than she ever could._

"_So, it's true."_

"_Did he tell you?" she asked softly._

"_No. But how could __**you**__ not tell me, Esme?" he fired at her. "You've always been the most honest person I know. You've always been there for me. You practically raised me!" he cried. "How could you not tell me what the fuck he did?"_

"_Edward Anthony Cullen, you will not speak to me like that," she snapped. Edward immediately felt ashamed. "I will take full responsibility for my part in this, but I will not tolerate you disrespecting me the way you do Carlisle."_

"_Esme, I-"_

"_Yes, it's true. And yes, he was wrong," she continued ignoring him. "But he had his reasons."_

_Edward snorted, tired of hearing how his father's mistakes were justified._

"_Tell me where they met. Which school?" _

_Esme hesitated, obviously surprised by his request._

"_Please, Esme, I need to know."_

"_Columbia," she sighed. _

"_What's her name?" His voice sounded dead even to his own ears._

"_Edward, what good will it do now?" she asked gently._

"_Esme. Her name," he growled._

_What seemed like minutes passed and he wondered if she'd hung up when he heard her whisper, "Kate Denali."_

And here he was a week and a half later. He'd looked up some friends that lived in Vancouver that he'd met at Juilliard and crashed with them for a few days. He did what research he needed and finally made the decision that brought him outside this door.

Outside a door that had the person with the truth on the opposite side.

_Maybe this was a mistake._

He jumped, startled as the door opened and students began pouring out. He watched them leave, some looking at him curiously, others not even sparing him a glace. As the door started to close behind the last student, he grabbed the knob before he could change his mind and knocked.

The woman sitting at the desk looked up and Edward felt his stomach roll.

It was like looking into a mirror. She had the same odd coloured bronze hair he had, hers containing a few strands of grey in. His nose and mouth were her nose and mouth. Her facial features were more delicate obviously; the only difference was his jaw was more shaped like Carlisle's. And of course the eyes were different.

The smile that had been on her face when she looked up slowly vanished. Edward saw recognition flash in her widened eyes as she looked at him. She knew who he was! Quickly composing herself, she forced a tight smile and addressed him.

"Can I help you?"

Edward swallowed. Her voice was soft. It sounded as sweet as he'd imagined as a child. Where was the hardness he'd expected her to have? No woman who was accused of doing the hateful things she supposedly did would sound like this.

"Um." His voice came out low, so low she probably didn't hear him. He cleared his throat and tried again. "I'm not a student." He walked a little farther into the room, but still stayed close to the safety of the door in case he decided to bolt.

"I'm sorry, but unless you have a problem that pertains to school work I can't help you," she said trying to brush him off. "I'm very busy."

He had just been dismissed. Something in him snapped and he straightened to his full height. She'd turned back to her papers, fully expecting him to leave apparently.

"I'm Edward Cullen," he declared.

She flinched as he said his last name and her hands stilled as the pen slipped from her fingers. She looked at him with cold vacant eyes.

"I don't know an Edward Cullen," she seethed. She looked him up and down and then glanced at the door. "You need to leave."

"No, you wouldn't know me, would you?" he muttered ignoring her command that he leave. "You know my father: Carlisle."

Edward saw her jaw stiffen as if she'd clamped her teeth together. She stood up from her chair quickly and brushed passed him, closing the door. She spun around and glared at him. _She _glared at _him_.

"You have no right to be here," she hissed narrowing her eyes. "_He_ had no right to send you. What do you want? Money?"

Edward flinched this time, but he didn't back down.

"My father didn't send me. He doesn't even know I'm here." He glared back. "And I don't need your money," he spat. "My father is an amazing surgeon who takes care of my every need."

For the first time in his life, Edward felt pride toward his father, and truth in the words he spoke.

Her eyes softened at his statement and the ice queen actually smiled.

"I wouldn't expect anything less from Carlisle Cullen." She saw the surprise in his face and quickly returned to bitch mode. "What do you want?"

"I've just recently learned the truth about what happened," Edward told her. "I need to hear it from you now."

"That's why you're here?" She arched an eyebrow. "For a history lesson?"

"That's how you think of this?"

"It's in the past which makes it history," she told him coldly. "The past should stay where it belongs."

"Not if my future depends on it," he snapped.

She shifted her eyes away and stared at something behind him.

"What do you want to know?" she finally asked, still not looking at him.

"Not much." He crossed his arms, refusing to look anywhere but her face. She'd have to look at him sooner or later. "My father told me you left when things didn't work out between the two of you. He said when you left he asked you to leave me behind."

Her eyes widened in surprise as she glanced at him. "He told you what?"

"He lied…to protect me." He hated to use the excuse that had been thrown at him so many times, but what choice did he have? "He didn't want to tell me the truth because of what it might do to me."

"He-" She paused. "He took all the blame?"

"It would appear so. He's never said one bad word about you." He smirked. "At least to me."

She slowly walked back to her desk and stood beside it, facing away from him. "Who told you what happened?"

Awesome. How was he supposed to describe Bella? Carlisle's twenty-three year old piece of ass? He almost chuckled at the thought, tempted to tell her just to see her reaction.

"A friend of his." Her reaction wasn't as amusing as "his piece of ass" would have been. "A friend of ours," he corrected himself.

Okay, maybe Bella wasn't really his friend, at least not yet, but he wanted to be. Even after all this.

"What were you told?"

"_She_ told me," he said making sure to stress the word 'she', "that you had an affair with a student." She stiffened. "You got pregnant and told him he could have it or you'd get rid of it." He sneered even though his chest tightened hearing the words. "You know, kind of like an old sweatshirt nobody wanted."

She spun around. "It wasn't that cut and dry!" she cried angrily. "I was married; I had a career, a reputation. I-"

"Didn't want a bastard child messing that up for you." Edward waved his hand. "I've heard it all."

"I had to protect my life," she said.

"If that's how you felt, why didn't you just have an abortion and not tell him?" Edward asked. To him that seemed like a logical solution to everything.

"I should have." She looked at him, not showing one bit of concern that she may have hurt his feelings. "Sometimes I wish I had."

Edward tried not to show how deeply her words cut. But his stomach flipped and he felt the bile rise in his throat. Damn her for having the ability to hurt him! He suddenly thought of Carlisle and wondered if this is how he felt every time Edward snapped at him and said cruel things.

"Especially now, right?" he accused through clenched teeth.

"No." She shook her head. "Not because you showed up here today, but because it would have made everyone's life easier."

Edward laughed bitterly. "Man, you are some piece of work. Do you realize you just looked me in the eye and basically told me you wish you had ended my life?" He asked the question calmly, even though inside he felt nothing but rage.

"Carlisle would have been better off-"

"Don't pretend like you give a damn about my father!" he yelled. He swore and ran his fingers through is hair, hating that she made him lose his temper so soon. "Don't assume that you know what would have been best for him."

"I don't expect a child to understand," she sneered. "Maybe once you're in the grown up world you'll see what real life is about."

"The grown up world?" Edward laughed for real this time. "By that definition, do you mean the world where teachers screw their students? Or is that just in your world?"

"Get out of my office!" she demanded pointing to the door. "Now. Or I'll call security."

"Hmm. I don't think you'll do that," Edward challenged as he stuffed his hands in his pockets.

"Try me."

"If you do that you'll have to explain who I am and I don't think that's something you want getting out. Is it, Kate?" He growled her name, hating the sound of it on his tongue.

She lost her overly confident look and dropped her arm to her side.

"Tell me your side of the story," Edward demanded.

She sat and crossed her legs. Picking up her pen, she rolled it between her fingers. She looked lost in thought, but then she finally glared up at him and nodded.

"Fine. But then you leave." She watched him, waiting for his response. When he nodded, she stared. "Yes, I slept with my student." She grimaced. "It's not something I'm proud of, but at the time I didn't care. Carlisle was different than the other young men. He was mature and he knew what his goals were and he wasn't going to let anything stand in his way of accomplishing them." She appraised him once again. "Obviously having you didn't stop him either."

Edward continued to stare at her not saying a word.

"Anyway, I soon started singling him out in class, making him the unofficial leader of my students. Everyone turned to him, asked him for his opinions or advice. No one suspected when I started asking him to stay behind after class. Every one knew he was _the_ student. That he was great."

"Please, spare me the details of how great he was," Edward muttered. Katherine Denali didn't seem like the type of woman who'd shy away from intimate details, even with someone who was biologically her son.

She shrugged, indicating Edward's assumption was correct.

"One evening I asked him to stop by the school and when he did…" She smirked as Edward shifted uncomfortably. "Things got heated."

"Who came on to whom?" Edward blurted the question, hating himself when he did, but knowing he had to know.

She smiled coyly at him. "I did of course. He never would have done anything without encouragement. Anyway, we only saw each other once or twice a month for six months at the most, and then-"

"I happened."

She pressed her lips together and nodded. "I gave him a choice; he made a decision, end of story." She shrugged.

"What did your husband think of all this?" Edward asked curious about the other man she'd royally fucked in the process.

"That's none of your business," she snapped.

"I know I wouldn't handle my wife being knocked up by some other guy very well," he mused.

"He knew if he spoke up he would look just as bad as I did," she answered coldly. "We had an agreement."

"Which was?" Edward pressed.

She glared at him. "He would stay with me until the baby was born and then we'd part."

"What kind of agreement is that?"

"Like I said, it's none of your business."

"How do I know you didn't pass me off as my father's child just to get away from your husband?" he blurted, never having thought of the possibly until this very moment.

She stared at him and his heart thumped in his chest. Could this woman have done that? Was there a possibly her ex-husband was really his biological father? Did she use the pregnancy as an excuse to push a husband she obviously didn't want away from her?

He looked nothing like Carlisle. Aside from the green eyes and the shape of his jaw, they were nothing alike. For all he knew her husband, or ex-husband, could have green eyes.

Had this woman played all of them?

"You're Carlisle's son," she finally said. "My husband was sterile."

"So you say," he accused even as his heart rate slowed and the nausea slowly diminished.

"Ask Carlisle." She shrugged. "I'm sure he had similar thoughts after you were born, and if he's as smart as I believe him to be, he would have had a DNA test done."

That thought stirred something inside him. Had Carlisle doubted he'd fathered the baby he'd brought into his home?

"Did you ever think about me?" He cringed as the words left his mouth. He knew the answer without her having to say it.

"No." There was no hesitation on her part. No worry she'd hurt his feelings. "I didn't even know you were a boy," she informed him as easily as she would have told him tomorrow's weather. "I didn't look at the child I birthed, much less hold it."

_It?_

He was standing right there and she referred to him as 'it'?

"I knew Carlisle would take care of you," she said softly this time. "I had no reason to worry."

"Not that you would have even if you didn't know who you were giving me to," he said.

She looked at him, not denying his accusation. Instead, she threw the pen back on her desk and crossed her arms. "Is there anything else you want to know?" She scowled.

Yes, there was one thing and he hated how much he needed to hear the answer.

"Did he…" He glanced at the stranger in front of him with his face and then looked away. "Did my dad hesitate when you gave him a choice? Did he ever not want me?"

Her face softened again and for a split second Edward saw the woman Carlisle had been seduced by. She watched him as he waited, holding his breath for her answer. Seconds seemed like hours.

Finally, he heard her sigh.

"No, he always wanted you," she told him.

Edward looked at her and saw her face harden again.

"If that's all, I'd appreciate it if you left. And didn't come back," she added.

As if he had any reason to.

_**CPOV**_

Carlisle groaned as he reached for his cell.

_This couldn't be happening._

He looked at the caller i.d. and silently cursed the caller.

"Hey, Es," he greeted. "Sorry, but I just clocked out of a fifty-two hour shift and just got to bed. Do you think you could call me ba-"

"Shut up, Carlisle," Esme snapped.

Carlisle shut up. Not because she told him to, but because he didn't know what to say. Esme was very rarely short with him. And she never spoke to him like that. If that's what married life did to a person he was glad he'd never taken the plunge.

He dragged his hand down his face that had entirely too much scruff on for his liking and let out a long sigh. He already knew this wasn't going to be a pleasant conversation.

"Have you heard from Edward?" Esme asked.

"No."

"It's been two weeks, Carlisle," she informed him as if he didn't know.

"I know, Esme. It's not for the lack of trying on my part. I've left messages. The boy won't answer his phone."

"He won't answer when I call either," she said sadly.

Carlisle's heart went out to his sister. This behaviour may not be new to him, but Esme had never been on Edward's bad side before. She wasn't use to his rejection and didn't know how to handle it.

"He'll call when he's ready," Carlisle told her for the hundredth time.

"Have you heard from Bella?" she asked.

The familiar feeling of being sucker punched in his gut returned without fail at the mention of her name.

Yes, he'd heard from her. Two weeks ago when she'd left a voice mail. A voice mail he'd saved, but never listened to. A voice mail that haunted him every time he checked his messages.

He couldn't listen to it. If he listened to it all the emotions of her betrayal would crash down on him. If he listened to it, he'd hear how sorry she was and want nothing more than to forgive her.

"In case you're interested I've talked to," Esme told him.

_Did she ask about me?_

"I'm not."

"She and Alice found an apartment," Esme informed him as if he'd asked. "Well, from what Bella said Alice had already found the apartment before they left and wanted to surprise her."

_Was she surprised? Does she like it? When are they moving? Did she ask about me?_

"It's a sublet, so they're already moving in," Esme continued knowing he was hanging on her every word. "I guess the couple is a friend of Alice's parents and they're traveling out of the country for a few months, so Alice jumped at the chance while they find their own place."

"Uh huh." _And?_

"She's working now," Esme rattled on.

"That's good." _What's she doing?_

"Carlisle, I know you care, so don't act like a prick."

_Excuse me?_

"Did you just call me a prick?"

"Carlisle, you're letting the best thing that's ever happened to you slip away," Esme chastened.

"She was going to sleep with my son, Esme," Carlisle seethed.

"She didn't."

"She would have."

"You don't know that."

"That's what she told me!" he cried.

"She was hurt and confused," Esme said softly.

"She didn't have to turn to Edward."

His stomach rolled at the thought. How she could ever consider _that_ still made him sick to think about. Edward. She was going to fuck Edward. Anyone else he may have been able to overlook, but Edward? How was he supposed to get passed that? How was he supposed to forgive her?

"And you didn't have to break things off because you suddenly found yourself too close."

"That's not what happened," Carlisle grumbled.

"You can use the conversation between Alice and Bella as an excuse, but I know the truth. You're entire life people have needed you and suddenly you needed someone and it scared you."

"You don't know what you're talking about, Esme," he argued.

"I don't know what I'm talking about?" She sounded insulted. "You looked out for me as a child, especially when we were with mom," she added with a laugh. "You took care of me when dad died, you became a parent when you were still practically a teenager and you chose a career where people need you all the time," she pointed out. "You feel the need to protect people, Carlisle. You want to make sure everyone around you is taken care of and you want to make everything better for them."

"Esme-"

"What you didn't count on was the way Bella made you feel," she continued. "She made you better. She made you want more and to feel that, to all of a sudden have that need, scared the hell out of you."

He wanted to argue, to tell her that she was wrong and only seeing what she wanted to see, but he didn't. How could he when she was right?

He'd been Esme's protector, he'd been his father's caretaker, he was Edward's father, and to top it off he was a doctor.

He could have had any career and yet he chose the one that people needed him the most. A career where lives depended on him. If that didn't tell him all he needed to know about his character nothing would.

All his life people had been dependent on him, but the way he felt he needed her, as if _his_ life depended on it, was unfamiliar. And as Esme pointed out, terrifying as all hell.

Even now his body still yearned for her. The mere mention of her name sent his heart racing with more than just anger. She'd been the first woman he'd told he loved. Not that she had any idea of the real significance of his declaration.

It had physically made him ill when he ended things with her. He really had thought he was doing the noble thing by letting her go. What life could he give her by being gone all the time? Being called away at any given moment ruining whatever plans they were in the middle of. She would have been giving up so much to be with him.

He believed her when she told him she didn't need marriage or children. That wasn't the problem. The problem was when he was with her _he_ wanted those things.

Charlie and Esme's wedding had been his point of no return. When he saw her at the house before they left for the hall with only Esme and Alice, he could easily picture her up there getting ready for their wedding.

It was that thought that made him tell Charlie everything. He needed the one constant man in her life, the one she trusted more than any other male, to be on his side. To see the good in what they had. He needed him to understand that his daughter wasn't some cheap thrill meant to distract him for the week.

"_I'm falling in love with Bella, Charlie," he blurted as soon as they pulled out of the driveway. _

"_You can't possibly love her, Cullen," Charlie said gruffly, flexing his hands as if he was ready to punch something….or someone._

"_How long did it take you to realize you loved Esme?"_

"_A lot longer than a week!"_

"_I'm not some love struck teenager, Charlie. Although, that's how she makes me feel," he added with a smile. Charlie glared at him. "The point is," Carlisle continued, shifting uncomfortably in his seat, "I'm not one of those twenty-something year old men she'd bring home that's still trying to find himself and doesn't know who he is." _

"_Those twenty-something year old men are the ones she can have a life with," Charlie mumbled. "They're young enough for her to have a family with, to grow old with. Can you give her that?"_

"_If that's what she wanted I could. We've talked about that and I know where she stands on marriage and children, Charlie." _

"_She's only twenty-three. She could change her mind tomorrow about what she thinks she wants, or doesn't want, today."_

"_I know, and if she did I'd be more than willing to give her that." He chanced a glance at his brother-in-law. "I know who I am. I've made something of myself and accomplished the goals I set out to do. The only thing that's been missing is her. She's the one I'm supposed to have by my side to fully complete my life."_

_Charlie sat in silence until they reached the hall and finally looked at him._

"_I'm not happy about this, Carlisle. In my opinion you're much too old for her."_

"_Being closer in age doesn't mean you'll be happy. Sure, you may have more in common, but that doesn't guarantee happiness," Carlisle replied softly. "I make her happy, Charlie. I know I do."_

"_As much as I hate to admit it, I know you do, too." Charlie frowned._

"_You do?" Carlisle asked surprised._

"_She's never been happier." Charlie sighed deeply. "Like I said, I don't like it." He looked at Carlisle. "But Bella's old enough to make her own decisions. I haven't interfered in her personal life before and I won't start now. But if you hurt her-"_

"_I'd rather die than hurt her," Carlisle promised._

_Charlie's eyes twinkled as he said, "I'll hold you to that."_

Carlisle wasn't sure when Charlie had decided to be in his corner, but the encouragement he had shown while taking the wedding pictures had given him hope.

And yet, here they were two weeks later, both hurting more than anyone could imagine.

"Carlisle, are you there?" Esme asked brining him back to the present.

"Uh, yeah."

"Just call her," Esme pleaded.

"Esme, I'd appreciate it if you stayed out of this," Carlisle sighed.

"She's my step-daughter," Esme said. "I have a right to be concerned.

_Yeah, you perv. She's your step-niece._

He couldn't help wondering if the thought ever crossed her mind. He grinned thinking of her response.

"Carlisle?"

"Right." He snapped himself back to reality. "I'll let you know if I hear anything from Edward."

"Carlisle, I-"

"I need to sleep, Es." He looked at the alarm clock. "The movers are coming today."

"I can't believe you moved into a house without any furniture," Esme muttered.

It was either move into his place early, or change rooms at the hotel. Every time he walked into the room he was reminded of her. He couldn't even use the dresser without picturing her seated on top of it moaning his name. The reminders were haunting and he had to get out.

It wasn't until he moved into his house that he realized she'd been there, too. There was no escaping the memories.

"I bought a bed," he replied to Esme's comment.

Which he'd promptly put in the guest room to spend his nights. He couldn't very well move out of the house as easily as he could the hotel, but he didn't have to stay in the master bedroom.

Immature? Probably. But it beat the hell out of feeling alone, because that's all he felt now when he was around places they'd been together. Utterly alone. It was no coincidence he was spending more time at work.

"Charlie and I want to come see your home when you're settled."

"Charlie?"

_Would it be overreacting to install a metal detector in the front door?_

"Charlie isn't mad at you, Carlisle." Esme sighed. "He knows about it all and has been assured by Bella it's all her fault. She told him you were nothing but wonderful."

_Really?_

"She said that?"

"Yes. But I don't agree that it was all her fault." She paused. "You need to own up to your part just as much as Edward does."

"I have to go, Esme," he said sensing another lecture.

"She loves you, Carlisle," Esme said trying to get through to him one last time. "And I know you love her."

"Let me know if Edward calls you. Tell Charlie I said hi." _And that I appreciate he hasn't hunted me down yet. _"Bye." He snapped the phone shut and dropped it beside him on the bed.

He rolled over onto his side, closing his eyes trying to welcome sleep again, but it was no use. His body may be screaming for more sleep, but his mind was anything but tired.

He got out of bed and pulled on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. He grabbed his cell from the bed and went downstairs in search of caffeine. It wasn't until he hit the kitchen that he remembered he didn't have his coffee maker yet and the only caffeine in the house was half a chocolate brownie from two nights ago.

_Fan-friggin-tastic._

He opened the fridge and yanked out a bottle of water. He was going to need more than H20.

_Was she moving on?_

The thought caught him off guard and he coughed on his water. He kept himself as busy as he possibly could these past two weeks so he wouldn't have to think about her.

She had a new place, a new job and she hadn't tried to make contact with him again.

_Maybe because you blew her off, asshole._

True. But could she really be over him? Was it that easy?

Carlisle looked at his surroundings and felt that fist in his stomach again. He'd gone to her that afternoon hoping to have a future with her. He'd picked up that university book intending to show her that she could have the same opportunities in Seattle as she did in Phoenix. Only it would be better because they'd be together.

And then out of nowhere his thoughts had turned to one of the spare rooms upstairs. Despite her protests, he couldn't help but wonder if she would always want to keep it a guest room, or at some point in the future if she'd be willing to consider redecorating it either a light pink or blue.

Yes. He'd actually let himself go _there_.

A baby.

A perfect mix of her dark hair and his green eyes, her nose and his mouth. She'd have her mother's sass and compassion and her father's ambition and level headedness.

Their baby.

What a fool he'd been getting a head of himself like that.

Maybe he was a fool to have thought about it at all. She'd made it clear she didn't want children and he'd never even entertained the thought of having any more kids. He thought he was too old to start a family now. Even though, as she pointed out, there were men almost twice his age becoming fathers. He just accepted that that part of his life was done.

Until he met her and felt like anything was possible.

_Fuck._

This wasn't what he needed right now.

The doorbell ringing was a welcomed distracted. A quick glance at his cell told him it was too early for the movers, but as long as whoever was at the door kept his mind off her he didn't care.

The bell rang again just as he pulled it open.

_So much for that._

"Edward." He stared at his son as a mix of emotions ran through him so fast he didn't know what to feel first.

"Esme told me where to find you," he said looking at Carlisle's chest rather than directly at him.

Carlisle stepped back, opening the door for Edward to come in.

"When did you talk to Esme?" he asked

"Five minutes ago," Edward answered entering the house.

"I've been trying to get in touch with you for weeks now," Carlisle said shutting the door behind him.

"Yeah, I know." Edward turned around and smirked. "Just because I don't return calls doesn't mean I don't get my messages."

"Did it ever occur to you to return at least one to let someone know you were alright?"

"Did it ever occur to you to tell me the truth about my mother?" Edward snapped back.

Carlisle remained silent. He watched him turn away from him and look around the house. He did not want to have this conversation turn into a fight right off the bat. Or at all if he could help it.

"I was going to tell you, Edward," Carlisle started. "I just didn't know how to."

"Yeah. I guess that happens after twenty years of lies," Edward remarked.

"I was just trying to spare you the pain the truth would bring."

"Because finding out now makes it less painful, right? Especially when I find out from your fuck toy."

"Don't call her that!" Carlisle snapped without thinking.

Edward slowly turned around and looked at him. "Did I strike a nerve?" he mocked.

"We'll have this conversation like two civilized adults, but you'll leave her out of it," Carlisle said firmly.

"Oh, I don't know if that's possible. If it wasn't for Bella opening her trap, I'd still be in the dark about everything, right, Dad?" Edward glared at him.

"I know it was wrong," Carlisle agreed, "but you were a child. How was I supposed to tell you that it was her choice to walk away and leave you?"

"And what was your excuse as I got older?"

"We…didn't talk about it," Carlisle said softly, knowing it was a lame to say. "You asked once and we never spoke of it again."

Edward walked over to the fireplace and ran his hand over the mantel.

"Nice house," he commented with his back to his father. "Seems kind of empty, though."

"You don't want to talk about furniture, son," Carlisle muttered.

"How do you relax with nowhere to sit?" Edward wondered out loud ignoring his remark.

Carlisle knew what he was doing. It was either play along with his avoidance game until he was ready to talk, or force him to open up. He sighed, seeing no choice but to play along.

"The furniture is arriving this morning. I'm not home very often, anyway." He wished he could take the words back as soon as he heard them.

Edward smirked. "Some things never change."

"I was there for you, Edward." He knew that's how he felt, but it still wounded him to hear his son accuse him of neglect.

"No," he disagreed. "Esme was there for me. You were just in the background making occasional appearances."

"Don't you think I wanted to be there more?" Carlisle asked. "If I could have, don't you think I would have been there every single day? You have no idea how horrible I felt every time I missed a chance to tuck you into bed or make you breakfast." Carlisle's voice broke as he remembered five year old Edward asking him why he was never home to read him a bedtime story. "Every day at the park I missed, every little league game I had to skip, every memory Esme has with you that I don't still hurts more than you could ever imagine, Edward."

"If you really felt that bad you could have done something differently," Edward muttered.

"What could I have done?" Carlisle cried helplessly. "Everything I did was for you so you could be where you are right now."

"Don't make this all about me," Edward snapped. "You did what you did for yourself, too."

"What would you have me do?" Carlisle asked. "I was just twenty-one when you were born, Edward. Would you have rather I become a statistic and dropped out of school all together and worked at some dead end job? Do you think you'd have the life you do now if I had done that?"

"That's being materialistic," Edward mumbled.

"You seem to enjoy those material things. I don't recall you objecting to the car I bought you, the school I'm paying for or the trips you take."

"Do you want me to slap you on the back and congratulate you on the success you've made for yourself, Dad?" Edward cried. "Fine. Well done. You have a great career and you're a damn good doctor. Do you think that makes up for everything else?"

"You treat me like the enemy, Edward." Carlisle gestured between the two of them. "I've tried to have a relationship with you, but you won't let it happen."

"So, this is my entire fault?" Edward shouted.

"No. I'm just saying you haven't made it easy-"

"You've lied to me my entire life!" he screamed. "What right did you have to do that? What right do you have to fuck with people's lives? To determine what they should or shouldn't know?"

Carlisle looked at his son, stunned by his outburst. He'd never seen Edward this upset. His cheeks were flushed, his hands balled into fists and he was shaking. Carlisle was positive if they had been in a room with launch able objects he'd be ducking right now.

How did he answer that? What could he tell Edward that would make him see that what he'd done was only done out of love?

"What would you have said if you were me, Edward?" Carlisle asked softly. "If you had a sweet innocent little boy asking you where his mother was, what would you have told him?"

Edward shook his head and looked away.

"Would you have told him the truth? Would you have looked that little boy in the eye and told him he meant nothing to his mother? That she didn't want him?" Carlisle saw Edward flinch and paused, waiting for him to say something. When he didn't Carlisle continued. "Would you have told a child he was unloved by the woman who gave him life? That he was nothing but a complication that she had to get rid of."

"Stop," Edward demanded through his teeth, still not looking at his father.

"Would you have broken not only a child's heart, but his spirit as well by telling him all the horrible things that were said and done?" Carlisle wanted to rip his own tongue out instead of saying anything more. The pain in Edward's voice was unbearable, but how else could he get him to understand? "Would you have done all that, Edward?" Carlisle rasped his voice thick with emotion. "Or would you have lied and spared him all that pain?"

Edward glared at him, his eyes swimming in unshed tears.

"You don't know how cold she was, son," he whispered, remembering her demeanour that day. "I couldn't tell you."

"Actually, I do know," Edward suddenly said.

Carlisle looked at him confused. "What do you mean?"

Edward turned away from him and walked over to the large living room window. He placed his hand on the glass and looked out at the front lawn; his shoulders slumped as if admitting defeat.

"I went to go see her," he confessed.

Carlisle stilled, sure he must have heard him wrong. He went to go see her? As in Kate? As in the woman who turned her back on her child twenty years ago? He narrowed his eyes in Edward's direction, waiting for him to explain.

"I thought maybe there was a chance what you told me was true and the fabrication was to everyone else," he said softly.

"You saw Kate?" Carlisle forced himself to ask not wanting to believe it was true. "How did you find her?"

"You can find anyone on the Internet," Edward replied wistfully. "There aren't too many Katherine Denali's that are university professors.

_He knew her name?_

"Who-"

"Esme told me," Edward answered knowing the question before Carlisle could ask. "There was only one that was employed at your old school. She wasn't hard to locate."

Carlisle didn't care where she was or what she was doing. He didn't care if she had been able to move on with no regrets or if she was tormented everyday by her decision. All he cared about was what she said to _his_ son to make him look like he did. There was nothing left of the cocky, self assured young man that had walked into his house moments ago. Edward looked as if he was crumbling right before his eyes.

"She's closer than you probably ever imagined, Dad."

"I never imagined it," Carlisle muttered. "I haven't wasted a thought on her in years."

"I find that hard to believe." Edward turned his head slightly to glance at Carlisle. "How can you not think of her when I resemble her so much?"

Carlisle watched his son, not knowing what to say. Yes, Edward reminded him of Kate in many ways. His entire demeanour was like her. But did he actually think about the woman who'd stolen his youth? No.

"She's in San Diego," Edward continued. "Just a mere nineteen hours away. So I drove there and went to UC where she teaches. Class had just been let out and when I found her she was seated at her desk. I knocked and when I walked in she looked up, and as much as she tried to hide it, I saw the recognition in her eyes," Edward recalled softly.

Carlisle wanted to reach out to him. To grab him and hold him despite how much he'd protest, and to tell him it was okay. He wanted to comfort him as he told his story of meeting the woman who'd given birth to him. He wanted to be his son's rock because Carlisle knew that this tale would not end happily.

But he stayed rooted to the spot. He knew Edward would pull away if he tried to comfort him, and as much as he needed to know he was loved, he needed to tell his story first.

"She tried to brush me off when I told her I wasn't a student but needed to speak to her anyway. She told me she was too busy to speak to anyone unless it was school related." Edward's hand balled into a fist against the glass. "I ignored her and told her who I was, not that I had to because she damn well knew. Her eyes were….so cold."

Carlisle remembered that expression well. He imagined it was the same one she wore when she'd told him she was pregnant. He hated that Edward had seen that look.

"She told me she didn't know an Edward Cullen and that I needed to leave." He looked at Carlisle. "That's when I told her she knew you." He laughed bitterly. "You should have seen here then. She jumped out of her seat and crossed the room to shut the door so fast you'd think her life depended on it." He looked thoughtful for a minute. "Maybe she felt like it did," he said so low Carlisle strained to hear him.

"Edward,-"

"She told me I had no right to be there," Edward said cutting him off. "That you had no right to send me. When I told her you didn't know I was even there she didn't know what to say. Well, actually she accused me of wanting money."

Carlisle's heart ached for his son. His stomach rolled at what he could only imagine happened next. Edward looked like he was on the breaking point of total rage and dropping to the floor and bawling like a child.

"I told her the only thing I wanted from her was the truth."

"What did she say?" Carlisle hated to ask, but knew he had to.

"She was surprised that you took all the blame." He looked at Carlisle and for the first time in a long time Carlisle didn't see anger or hatred in his eyes. He quickly turned away again and faced the fireplace this time. "I told her what Bella told me and asked her if that's what really happened and she said yes," he whispered hoarsely.

"I'm sorry, Edward," Carlisle murmured. "I never wanted you to go through any of this. I never wanted you to have to face her," he added.

"So, you would have kept her a secret forever?"

"I would have done anything to spare you of what you're feeling now," he answered honestly.

Edward spun around, shouting, "How can you possibly know how I'm feeling? You weren't in the room with her! You didn't see how she looked at me!" The first tear rolled down his cheek and Carlisle felt ill.

He hadn't seen Edward cry in years; he wouldn't allow himself to show that kind of emotion. It tore at Carlisle's insides to see his son like this, just like it had when he was a child and would skin his knee and cry for Daddy. Only this felt worse. Much worse. Hugs and kisses and Elmo bandages weren't going to make this pain go away.

"She told me it would have been easier for everyone if she had had an abortion," Edward whispered.

"It wouldn't have been better for me, Edward."

"She said she sometimes still wished she had," Edward added, either not hearing him or choosing to ignore the comment.

For the first time in his life, Carlisle felt physical rage towards a woman. If he ever wanted to lash out at someone it was now. His hands balled into fists as he looked at the damage she'd caused his son by telling him such things. Carlisle took a step towards him and Edward backed away.

"How could you possibly understand unless you had a parent look you in the eye and tell you the world would have been better off without you!" he screamed.

"She's not a parent, Edward," Carlisle said softly. "Just because you share DNA with someone doesn't make them a parent. You're better than that, son." He took another step towards him. "You're better than her."

"No, I'm not." Edward shook his head and an emotion Carlisle had never witnessed before filled his eyes. Edward felt guilty. "I wanted to sleep with Bella because she was with you," he confessed.

Carlisle stilled. He stared at Edward, trying to wrap his head around what he had just said.

"I knew what was going on between the two of you and I tried my hardest to seduce her. I only wanted her to hurt you." Edward ran his hand through his hair, messing it more than it already was.

"Why would you do that?" Carlisle asked.

"Because I blamed you for her leaving," he whispered. "I wanted to take something away from you like I felt you took from me."

"The night she…" Carlisle couldn't bring himself to say the words. "The night she told you-"

"She was pretty much drunk," Edward said. "It wasn't about wanting me. I could have been anyone at that moment. She never wanted to be with _me_, she just wanted to be with someone….anyone," he tried to explain. "And I couldn't…. As much as I wanted to hurt you, I couldn't do that to her."

Carlisle looked at his son as a thought crossed his mind, something he hadn't considered until this second.

"Do you have feelings for her, Edward?" His head shot up. "Because if you do-"

"You'll what? Gracefully bow out and let me have my turn?" Edward sneered.

The impulse Carlisle had to slap his son surprised him. He'd never laid a hand on him. But to hear him talk about her like that, like she was some carnival ride, woke his ugly side. The thought of him with her was more than he was able to stand. There was no way he'd gracefully bow out.

"I don't want her, Dad," Edward said. "I never wanted her that way. But don't you see?"

"Apparently, not," Carlisle grumbled.

"I'm just as cruel as Kate is," he cried. "I was willing to hurt my father and destroy another person's life in the process."

"But you didn't."

"But I would have! If she hadn't been so torn up over you and actually wanted me I would have! What kind of person does that make me?" he asked looking at Carlisle.

"Edward,-"

"I put my hands on her!" Edward bellowed. "I grabbed her and called her a lying bitch, and held her arms so tight she winced!" Edward looked sick. "I hurt her."

Carlisle stood there, stunned. Edward had physically harmed a woman? And not just any woman. _His_ woman. The possessiveness of his thoughts surprised him almost as much as Edward's admission. He still thought of her as his.

"Was she alright?" Carlisle asked.

"I didn't hurt…" Edward shook his head. "I let her go. I didn't know what I was doing."

"Was. She. Alright?" Carlisle asked slowly, forgetting he'd seen her after the incident and knew for a fact she was fine.

Edward nodded. "I left."

Why hadn't she told him what happened? Why had she kept Edward's actions to herself? She hadn't even hinted that she knew about Edward's agenda.

_Maybe she didn't know._

"Did she know about your intentions?" Carlisle asked. "Did she know why you wanted to… bed her?"

"I told her. She thought I was attracted to her and that's why I was constantly flirting."

"And you're not?" Carlisle asked again.

"No! I told you I only wanted to screw her to hurt you!"

Carlisle looked away, not sure how to feel about this new piece of information. Did this change what he thought about her and her actions? _Could_ it change things?

"Did you ever wonder if Kate had lied to you about my paternity?" Edward suddenly asked.

Carlisle watched his son who was avoiding looking at him.

"I had a DNA test done, yes."

"Before or after you brought me home?"

"It was a couple of months after."

Edward looked at him sadly. "You waited that long to find out? Why would you bring an infant into your life if you didn't know he was truly yours?"

"I…" Carlisle sighed knowing he had to be truthful now after all the lies had finally been exposed. "I had a hard time adjusting to life when I brought you home. I was distant and it was mostly because I questioned whether you were really mine or not. Esme took to you right away." He smiled. "There was never any doubt in her mind that you belonged with us."

"She said her husband was sterile," Edward said.

Carlisle nodded. "That's what she told me, too. How could I know if it was true or not, or if she was only sleeping with me and not someone else, too."

"I don't blame you for questioning it," Edward told me. "I wondered it myself and asked her if was possible that her husband was actually my biological father."

Carlisle flinched. "Would you have been relieved if that had been the case?" he asked softly.

"No." The admission was quiet, but Carlisle heard it and his heart soared.

"What would you have done if it had proven I wasn't yours?" Edward asked.

"You had been with us for awhile by then and I was growing to love you more and more every day. You already had Esme's heart." He looked at his son knowing the truth he didn't know back then. "You would have always been my son, even if it wasn't by blood, Edward."

"I'm just like her," Edward whispered. Carlisle saw him tremble. "I'm just as selfish and cruel as her."

"Edward, you're not."

"She said you never hesitated to take me." He looked up at him shaking his head. "She said you always wanted me." Carlisle swallowed, nodding. "All you've ever done is love me," Edward whispered as if he just realized it was true. "Even when you didn't know for sure all you ever did was love me. And this is what I do to you."

Carlisle took a step closer to him as sobs shook his body. Gently he laid his hand on Edward's back and slowly pulled him into his embrace. Surprisingly, Edward didn't resist. He stayed rigid and didn't attempt to hug Carlisle back, but he didn't resist.

Carlisle felt like he'd won a small part of this battle as he held his son while he quietly wept.

_**A/N: Was it what you were expecting? Does it answer your questions regarding Carlisle and Edward's relationship? I see a very long road to healing, but I hope they get there. This is a very big first step in the right direction. **_

_**Do you hate Kate as much as I do? What a witch that woman is!**_

_**One last chapter, my friends. I haven't really started it because honestly, I'm sad to think of writing the final words to their story. There will be an Epilogue, and guess what....it's already written. Yes, Carlisle and Bella have revealed to me where they end up, as do the other characters, now they just have to help me find the way there. It's not very long, but I do believe it will give everyone closure to their relationship.**_

_**Now, off and review! **_


	18. Forever

_**It seems fitting that my last chapter is my longest yet. It read 45 pages on my computer! Seriously people, it took me forever. I actually considered cutting it in half and posting two chapters, but no where felt right to do that.**_

_**I am unbelievably sad that this is my last official chapter. A lot of rum helped heal a broken heart over the weekend. Although, I still feel like crying as I type this out.**_

_**I thank each and every one of you who read this and made it the small success, to me at least!, that it is. And a very special thank you to everyone who took the time to review and to pimp it out in your own fics.**_

_**A HUGE thank you to Nina for validating it in the first place, and to Leslie for taking the time to beta my monster chapters. **_

_**I am actually very nervous about this chapter and I hope it does Bella and Carlisle justice.**_

_**For the last time, SM owns all things Twilight. I've had an awesome time playing with her characters though!**_

"Okay, I've had enough, Swan," Alice said grabbing the remote from Bella's hand. She clicked the T.V. off and stuffed the remote down the back of her pants for good measure.

There was no way Bella was venturing down there to get the damn thing.

"All you've done since we've moved in is work, watch T.V., read or sleep," Alice huffed.

"I eat, too," Bella reminded her.

"I'm tired of this moping!" Alice threw her hands in the air. "I want to go out and have some fun."

"Go." Bella yawned. "Besides," she pointed a finger at her friend, "you are the one that's been locked in her room having phone sex with Jasper every night."

"We do not have phone sex," Alice denied the accusation.

"Oh, I'm sure you're begging him to take you somewhere when you pant, 'Jasper make me come!'." Bella rolled her eyes.

Alice blushed. "You can hear me?"

"I only live in the same country."

"Whatever. It's Friday night and I want to go out!" Alice stomped her foot.

She actually stomped her foot.

"I'm tired," Bella muttered.

"Bella," Alice dropped beside her on the cream coloured couch and took her hand in hers, "it's been over a month. Almost two." Bella tried to pull her hand away, but Alice held tight. "You need to go out and have some fun."

"I don't want to have fun," Bella grumbled.

That had been her answer to everything Alice asked her to do for the past few weeks. It wasn't that she didn't want to have fun, she just didn't know if she _could _have fun. Nothing was fun anymore. Nothing felt the same without him.

"Isabella Marie Swan, you will get your ass off this sofa and into a hot outfit this instant!"

"Don't second name me, Mary Alice Brandon," she snapped back.

Bella looked away and focused on the space around her. She should be over the moon right now. She was living in an amazing apartment, an apartment she wouldn't have been able to afford on her own if it hadn't been for Alice's parents' friends. She had a job she actually liked. It wasn't something she wanted to do for the rest of her life, but she liked the work and the money wasn't too bad either. If she wasn't so hung up on other things she may have even taken advantage of the cute men that hit on her.

But she was hung up on other things. She was still holding onto a small thread of hope that Carlisle would call. She'd left him a message the night she'd returned home telling him where she was and that the ball was in his court and that he wouldn't hear from her again unless he called her.

That had been six weeks ago. It didn't take a psychic to figure it out, but Bella still hoped.

"Bella," Alice said softly, "I'm sorry you put your heart out there and got nothing in return, but how long do you intend to sit around and wait for him to call?"

"I'm not waiting for him to call," Bella mumbled. "I'm just…not interested in going out."

"Well, that's too bad, isn't it? Because tonight you're going out and that's final," Alice declared.

"Alice," Bella sighed. "How would you feel if Jasper suddenly stopped calling? Would you want to go out?"

"Maybe not, but I wouldn't sit around after hearing nothing for six weeks. And I'd expect you to drag me out for my own good!"

There was no winning with Alice. Why was she even fighting her anyway? Bella didn't want to admit it, but Alice was right. It had been weeks. If he hadn't called by now he wasn't going to. Why was she wasting her time at home?

The answer to that was obvious also.

"Just one night, Bella?" Alice pleaded. "Let it all go for one night?"

Bella felt herself nodding before she could stop herself. Alice clapped her hands and pulled her up from the couch, beaming.

"I'm going to do your hair and your makeup and find you something sexy to wear-"

"No," Bella said firmly. "I'll go out, Alice, but I'm not playing dress up Bella."

"Bel-"

"Take it or leave it."

"Fine," Alice grumbled. "You have an hour."

_If Alice was ready in an hour it would be a miracle. _

Bella sulked as she made her way to the bathroom and showered. The warm water felt soothing on her tense muscles as she let the water wash over her body. But suddenly the steady stream reminded her of all the tears she'd cried in two months over him.

_So much for relaxing._

She shut off the shower and quickly dried off. Back in her bedroom she dressed in a pair of skinny jeans and a black halter top before running the brush through her hair and adding some mousse. She applied light makeup and slipped her feet into a pair of flats and hollered for Alice.

"You better be ready or I get to stay home!"

"Don't get your panties in a twist," Alice called back from the bathroom. "I'll be out in five."

Bella snorted. Alice's five minutes would be closer to fifteen if she was lucky. She sat on the couch and laid her head back, closing her eyes.

"_Edward told him the truth, Bella," Esme confided in her. "He told him about his revenge plan."_

"_Edward told him?" Bella cried, surprised. "Why? When?"_

"_About a month ago."_

"_They're on speaking terms, then?"_

"_Yes." Bella heard the smile in Esme's voice. "It's still not great, but they're civil and it's a start. It's going to take time."_

"_I'm glad."_

"_He hasn't called?" Esme asked sadly._

"_No."_

"_He's miserable without you, Bella. He's just being stubborn."_

"_I don't blame him, Esme. I have only myself to blame."_

"_If it wasn't for you they wouldn't be working on their relationship right now. He should be down on his knees grovelling," she muttered._

"_I just want him to be happy."_

"_He's not happy though, Bella. Not without you."_

If he wasn't happy without her, then why hadn't he called?

She had to stop herself countless times from calling him. Everyday her fingers itched to dial his number. It was part of the reason she tried to keep herself distracted, whether it was T.V. or a book, she need to keep her attention on something so her mind didn't have time to idle.

Like it was doing now.

The restriction she felt around her heart returned every time she thought about him. The pain was always worse at night when she lay awake in bed for hours, her mind filled with thoughts of him. Was he thinking of her? If Edward had told him the truth, why hadn't he called? Had too much time passed and he'd changed his mind about wanting to be with her despite what Esme said?

Was he moving on without her?

Tears burned her eyes behind her closed lids. She blinked them away and saw Alice watching her.

"What?" Bella asked.

"I hate to see you like this," she said. "I hate that you're both too stubborn to see what you're doing to each other."

"Alice," Bella warned.

"I've got a good mind to call him myself."

"Don't you dare!" Bella cried.

"Maybe if he knew Edward's part in it all-"

"He knows," Bella cut her off. "Esme told me Edward told him everything weeks ago."

"He knows?" Bella nodded. "Then why hasn't he called?" Bella shifted her eyes to her lap and bit her lip. "Bella-"

"Edward may have had alternative motives when he was nice to me, but no one forced _me_ to do what I did," Bella muttered. "I don't blame Carlisle for not being able to forgive me."

"Okay, enough," Alice demanded. "No more wallowing, no more crying, no more wasting your time. We're going out tonight and we're going to have fun." Bella wiped the tears from her cheeks and nodded. "Dark Corners finally opened, so that's where we're going."

Bella grimaced. "Do we have to go to a club?"

"Yes."

Dark Corners was loud, crowded and reminded Bella too much of Bliss. And Bliss reminded her of Carlisle.

Dark Corners was not a good idea.

Alice introduced her to a few of her coworkers that met them there. Bella tried to engage in their conversations, but her mind often wondered to the last time she'd been in this kind of environment and what had taken place outside.

It had been too long since she'd felt his touch. Too long since she'd heard his voice. Too long since she'd felt…anything. Most of the time it was like she was living in a daze and just going through the motions of every day life and nothing else.

She hated feeling this way. She hated feeling nothing, but she hated the thought of actually feeling something more. That would mean she'd accepted things were over and would have to move on.

Without him.

"Bella?" Alice nudged her.

"Sorry. What?"

"We're going to hit the floor. Coming?"

"No." The floor was the last place she needed to be right now. "I'm going to get a drink."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just need a refill." She forced a smile. "Go have fun."

Alice pressed her lips together and looked like she wanted to argue. Instead, she slipped from her seat with no comment and followed her friends through the crowd.

Bella pushed her way to the bar, breathing a sigh of relief when she reached the bar safely without tripping or tripping someone else. She leaned over the counter signalling the bartender.

"What'll it be?" He grinned at her.

"A vodka and cran with a wedge of lemon." Bella froze as the voice behind her answered for her.

The bartender gazed from her to him, shrugged and hurried off to get her order.

"Hello, Bella," he said softly.

She swallowed and slowly turned around to find the familiar pair of blue eyes staring down at her.

"James," she said barely above a whisper.

He smiled, the dimples in his cheeks flashing. His sandy blond hair was shorter than she remembered, but he was the same. She wasn't sure why she'd expected him to look different considering it had only been over a year since she'd last seen him.

"I saw you come in hours ago." He moved to stand beside her, leaning on the bar. "But you were with Alice and I didn't think it would be a good idea to approach you with her around," he chuckled.

"What are you doing here?" she finally managed to ask.

"The company I work for did the advertising for the club."

"Oh." Of all the clubs in Phoenix Alice had to pick the one where her ex was.

_Figures._

He continued to smile at her. "You look good."

"Uh, thanks." She glanced at the bartender as he placed her dink in front of her.

"I've got it," James offered.

"No, I-"

"Please, Bella, let me." He waited for her to nod before proceeding to pay for her drink.

"Thanks," she muttered.

She could feel his eyes on her as she stirred the lemon around in her drink. A drink he ordered for her on her behalf. A drink he didn't even know if she wanted or even liked anymore.

Anger suddenly rose in her chest. This was the man she'd spent five years of her life with. This was the man she'd first given her body, mind and soul to. This was the man who'd cheated on her with her dorm mate. This was the man who'd broken her heart.

And yet, he was standing here with her acting like nothing had happened and buying her a drink!

She pushed the glass away and glared at him. "What do you want, James?"

He raised his eyebrows in surprise at her sudden change in attitude.

"I wanted to see how you were," he said.

"You weren't concerned about my welfare when you were screwing my roommate," she snapped.

James frowned and reached for her glass draining half the contents. He sighed and placed the drink back in front of her.

"What I did was wrong, Bella," he admitted, "but I'm not the same person anymore."

"How much could you have changed in a year, James?"

"Well, I'm almost thirty; I had to grow up sooner or later." He grinned, but when his smile wasn't returned he sighed. "What I did to you, to us, was horrible. I have no excuses. I was a shit plain and simple."

"Why did you do it?"

James shrugged. "Immature. Inconsiderate. Bored. Choose one."

"You were bored? Thanks." Bella rolled her eyes.

"Sorry." He smiled sheepishly. "At the time it was how I felt. I was wrong and lost the best thing I had in my life at the time."

"You really hurt me," Bella told him. "And for a long time I thought it was me, something I did that made you cheat. It took me a long time to realize it wasn't me at all." She looked at him. "You were just a selfish dick."

He laughed and she smiled faintly.

"You're right," he said, "but even selfish dicks are capable of change."

"Hmm." Bella fidgeted with her drink again.

"Are you seeing anyone?" he asked quietly, so quite she barely heard him over the noise.

"Um…no?" It came out a question.

"Are you sure?"

"No. Yes. I don't know." Bella pushed her hair from her face, pulling on the strands in frustration.

"So, there is someone?" James pushed.

"There was."

"Not anymore?"

"I…I guess not," she mumbled. "It's a long story."

"Maybe you'd like to share it with me over dinner?" he suggested

Bella bit her lip as she watched him. Dinner with James? Was that a good idea? Was talking to him even a good idea? He'd done so much damage…

"It doesn't have to be dinner," he added quickly at her hesitation. "Drinks? Coffee? Ice cream?" He grinned. "Whatever you're comfortable with."

"I don't know…"

"I know you don't trust me, Bella," he said gently. "I want to prove you can, but I need that second chance to do that." He reached for her hand. "Haven't you done something you wished you hadn't and would do anything to make it right?"

Bella flinched at his words. He'd struck a nerve without realizing it. How could she deny him what she wanted from Carlisle so badly? Didn't it make her a hypocrite to tell him to go to hell after he'd hurt her so deeply when she'd done the same to Carlisle? She'd give anything to have him forgive her and give her a second shot. James was only asking for the same thing.

It didn't have to go anywhere. Grabbing a cup of coffee together was innocent enough. Besides, what was she supposed to do? Wait around for a call that may or may not come?

"Please, Bella," James begged.

"Okay." She nodded and searched her purse for a piece of paper and a pen. "Give me call and we'll set something up."

He beamed as she scribbled her number on the back of a receipt and handed it to him.

"Oh, hell no!" Alice cried walking up to them. "Who forgot to take the trash out?"

"Alice," Bella hissed.

"Don't 'Alice' me, Bella," she snapped and glared at James. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"It's nice to see you too, Alice." He looked from her to Bella, silently begging for help. There was no way she was rescuing him. "Alice, I know you're upset-"

"Upset?" she shrieked. "Upset doesn't even begin to cover it, Cole. You have no business talking to her."

"Alice, I can handle this."

Alice looked at her. "No, Bella. I spent months helping you put back the pieces." She turned back to James and poked him in the chest. "Pieces _you_ broke!"

"I know, Alice. It was hor-"

"Don't." Alice held up her hand. "Don't even try to act like the good reformed guy. Bella, please tell me you're not falling for this."

"I can see no matter what I say it's not going to make a difference, so I'm going to go before I cause a fight." James looked at Bella. "Thank you." He glanced one more time at Alice and left.

Alice turned on Bella, her eyes wild with rage. "What the hell was that about? You actually talked to that no good douche bag and he's able to _walk_ away. I would have broken both his legs!"

"I have no doubt you would have, Alice, but I'm not you." Bella sighed and shook her head, looking at the spot James had just vacated. "He just wanted to see how I was."

Alice snorted and Bella knew she was thinking the same thing she'd accused James of earlier.

"I'm tired. I'm going to head home, okay?" Bella squeezed Alice's hand and pushed past the bodies for the exit.

As she hailed a cab she couldn't help but wonder if she'd just made a huge mistake.

******

"Are you feeling alright, Bella?" her mom asked a few nights later over dinner.

Renee had insisted she come by for a home cooked meal fearing Bella was living off of mac and cheese and take out.

"I'm fine," Bella answered pushing her food around.

"Is there something wrong with your chicken pot pie?"

"No." Bella smiled. "It's great, Mom."

"Then why do you look like someone just ran over your kitten?"

Bella frowned. "I just have a lot on my mind."

Renee chewed on her bottom lip as she watched her daughter.

"How's work?" she finally asked breaking the silence.

"It's good. The work is easy, the people are nice and I haven't been infected yet by anything," Bella joked.

"Knock on wood." Renee fiddled with her napkin. "Living with Alice is going okay?"

"We haven't killed each other yet." Bella grinned. "Everything is fine, Mom. Really."

"He hasn't called, has he?" Renee guessed.

Bella shook her head and sighed. "I don't want to talk about it, though."

"I think you _need_ to talk about it, sweetie." Renee held her hand. "You're not happy."

"Of course I'm not happy," Bella muttered. "I fucked up everything and I just…I just want to make it right and I can't."

"Bella, maybe you should think about moving to Washington," Renee suggested softly.

Bella's head shot up and she looked at Renee, surprised by what she said.

"What?"

"You were happy when you were there."

"I was happy because I was with him, not because of where I was," Bella argued. "Moving to Washington won't help."

"Well, something has to help, Bella. You can't go on like this forever."

"I know…I…" Bella sighed as she decided she had to tell someone besides Alice. "I ran into James the other night."

"James? As in James Cole?" Her mother's hand tightened around hers.

"He was at a club opening Alice dragged me to," Bella explained. "He asked if he could take me out for coffee and I gave him my number." Bella peeked at Renee's reaction and wasn't surprised to see what she did.

"Bella." Renee pulled her hand away and sat back in her chair. "I don't think that's going to help anything."

"He sounded sorry for everything," Bella said weakly.

"Why would you let someone who hurt you that bad back in your life?"

"Doesn't everyone deserve a second chance?"

Renee shook her head, clearly frustrated. "That's what this is about? You're giving him a second chance because it's what _you_ want to be given?" Bella shrugged. "How is that going to help you move on, Bella?"

"He just wants to talk. It's not a big deal," Bella insisted.

"If it's not a big deal, then why did you feel the need to tell me?"

"I don't know," Bella grumbled regretting opening her mouth. "I guess I just wanted your opinion."

Renee stood and started clearing the table.

"I think you should go back to Washington."

******

"Have you given any thought to what your mom said?" James asked as they stopped to watch the elephants.

He had called Bella the night she returned home from having dinner with Renee and they'd made plans to grab coffee after work the next day where Bella proceeded to spill her heartache to him.

Was it ironic she was telling the man who'd broken her heart about the man she was totally in love with and whose heart _she'd _broken? Definitely.

But he'd listened and offered sympathy when needed and best of all he didn't offer any advice that would work in his favour.

She left feeling better about giving him her number than she ever expected. They had met twice since - coffee both times - until today when they'd gone for ice cream which had turned into a day at the zoo.

"About going back to Washington?" she asked addressing his question. He nodded. "No."

"Why not?"

Bella sighed. "I have a job here, an apartment, Alice, my mom…"

"If you don't mind me saying so, Bella, those are pretty minor things to stick around for. Alice won't be here forever, your mom wants to see you happy and you can find a job and an apartment anywhere."

"I have no reason to be there," she muttered.

"Your dad is there," he pointed out.

"He has Esme."

"What do you want then, Bella?"

"Not to talk about this."

"Okay." He smiled. "Have you told anyone we've been meeting?"

Bella laughed. "No. Unless you want Alice to go all ninja on your ass."

It had been almost two weeks since James and she had met at the club. Two weeks and four "dates" later she hadn't mentioned him to Alice or her mom again. Alice simply thought she'd come to her senses and Renee didn't ask.

James had made the past two weeks bearable though. She didn't think as much when he was around to distract her. She thought it would be awkward hanging out with him again, that he might try and make a move and take advantage of her, but he'd been nothing but supportive. He didn't ask anything of her, didn't hint about wanting to get back together, and hadn't even mentioned the past to try and get her to remember how great they used to be together.

The only thing he did was occasionally grab her hand. It should have made her uncomfortable, but oddly she felt comforted by it. When he held up her hand it didn't feel like he was trying to make a move, it felt like he was trying to be her friend. Nothing he did was intended to be intimate and Bella liked that.

"What did Renee say?" he asked.

"Uh, she didn't think it was a good idea either." Bella smiled at him. "For some reason they believe you're a bad guy," she teased.

He rolled his eyes. "I wonder what gave them that impression."

Bella turned away from the animals and continued to walk down the path. That really wasn't a conversation she wanted to have. James caught up to her and gently grabbed her fingers.

"Speaking as a man who has some experience in screwing things up," he said after a few minutes, "if he lets you go he's a fool."

"I guess we all do foolish things."

They walked the rest of the zoo in mostly silence. When they were at their cars James gave her a quick hug and promised to call her later.

Alice was flipping through _InStyle _when Bella arrived home. She glanced up and narrowed her eyes at her when she walked in.

"You look flushed."

"I've been out in the sun all day," Bella called from the kitchen.

"Hanging out with your mom?"

"No." Bella popped the tab on the coke and curled up on the couch. "I went to the zoo."

"The zoo?" Alice made a face.

"It was fun."

"Who did you go with?"

"A friend," Bella answered hoping Alice would drop it, but knowing she wouldn't.

"Bella, I'm your only friend right now."

Bella rolled her eyes. "You can easily be replaced."

Alice's eyes lit up and she leaned forward. "Are you seeing someone?" she squealed. "Is he from work? Is it Ben? He's so sexy!"

"No, it's not Ben and no I'm not seeing anyone," Bella replied. "He's a friend and nothing more."

Alice frowned. "Where do you go that you could have met someone? You work and come home unless I drag you out…" Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. "Oh my God!"

"What?"

"You've been sneaking around with the douche bag!"

"I'm not sneaking around with the douche bag…and don't call him that, please."

"Jesus Christ, Bella! Haven't you been through enough?"

"It's not like that. We're not dating. We have coffee and talk and that's all. You can be just friends with an ex, you know."

"Sure, if he's not sleazy and a total jerk."

"He's different now, Alice," Bella said defending him. "He hasn't tried anything, he's not pushing for us to be together, and he's done nothing but listen to me and gives me unbiased advice."

"You think his advice is unbiased?" Alice laughed. "Please."

Bella opened her mouth to argue when her cell phone chimed. Her heart skipped a beat like it always did when it rang or received a text hoping it was Carlisle. She quickly looked at the message and felt only slightly disappointed than she usually did when she discovered it wasn't from him.

_James: I had fun today. Dinner tonight?_

Bella bit her lip, debating.

"Is that from him?"

"No, it's my mom."

"Liar." Alice shook her head.

"Renee thinks I should move to Washington," Bella blurted. Alice blinked and stared at her, but made no comment. "He's been helping me sort out how I feel about everything, so yes, his advice is unbiased."

"Maybe it's not such a bad idea," Alice mumbled.

"It's not a bad idea. James-"

"Not him," Alice snapped. "Moving."

"What?" Bella cried, confused. "Alice, we just moved in here and-"

"Bella, I've applied for an assistant fashion designer position."

"Alice, that's great!"

"In New York," she finished. "My dad said he'll help me financially with a move and getting set up if I get it."

Bella stared at her. "New York? So soon?"

"I know. I moved us in here together expecting to be here for awhile and I feel awful, but this is an opportunity that I have to take, Bella!"

"No, I understand." Bella smiled tightly. "I'm happy for you. What did Jasper say?"

Alice beamed. "He wants to get a place together."

"Really?"

"I told him it was too soon for that," she said quickly. "I want to take things slowly."

"Why do I have the feeling even if you don't get the job you're leaving?"

Alice shifted her eyes away and Bella sighed.

"You could come too," Alice suggested softly.

"That's an even worse idea than moving to Washington," Bella muttered.

"Maybe you should think about it."

"Which?"

"Both." Alice stood. "I'm going to my parents' for dinner. Do you want to come?"

Her cell chimed again.

_James: Bella? Dinner?_

"Can't. I have plans."

Alice looked from the cell to Bella, but grabbed her purse without saying the thousand things Bella was sure she wanted to spit at her.

"I won't be home late," she said as if warning her James better not be around when she got home.

Alice hadn't been gone more than ten minutes when there was a knock on the door. James had said seven and it was only five and even if he had changed his mind there was no way he'd be able to get across town that fast. Thinking Alice forgot her keys Bella opened the door saying, "What did you forget now- What the hell are you doing here?"

He smiled, not at all surprised by her greeting.

"I wanted to talk to you," he simply said.

"It's called a phone. Pick it up and dial the number, it's cheaper and you wouldn't have had to come all this way only to have me slam the door in your face."

He gently laid his hand on the door to stop her from doing just that.

"Please," he said. "I really need to talk to you."

"Haven't you caused enough damage?"

"Yes." His hand dropped from the door and his smile turned sad. "That's why I'm here."

"Did Alice call you?"

He looked confused. "No. Why would she?"

"She just…. Never mind."

"Can I come in?"

Fighting the side of herself that wanted to tell him to go to hell and slam the door, she sighed and stepped back to let him in.

"How did you know where to find me, Edward?" she asked closing the door and pressing her back against it. "And how did you get in?"

"Esme told him." He scanned his surroundings and turned to her. "And I met Alice on her way out. She let me in."

"What do you want?"

She'd never seen him look more…broken. The cockiness that she'd known as Edward Cullen weeks ago was gone. His eyes didn't have the hardness they once had; they were softer, more like Carlisle's than ever before.

She closed her eyes and looked away. Her heart suddenly ached so intensely she had to wrap her arms around herself.

"Are you alright, Bella?" Edward moved closer to her and gently laid his hand on her arm.

She jerked out of his hold and stalked towards the living room.

"No, I'm not alright," she said spinning around to face him. "I haven't been alright in weeks."

"Bella, I-"

"What are you doing here?" she asked again.

"I want to talk to you."

"You could have called," she said again.

"I didn't think you'd answer." He held his hand up and Bella noticed the large brown envelope for the first time. "And Esme wanted you to have this."

"A stamp would have been cheaper."

"She was going to mail it, but I wanted to bring it to you." He held it out for her.

"Why?" she asked glaring at the offering.

"Open it and find out." He smiled.

Bella snatched the envelope from him and dropped it on the coffee table. "Okay, I've got it. You can leave now."

Edward sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "If you really want me to go I will, but if you would just give me five minutes I'd like to talk with you."

Bella chewed on her bottom lip, an action that was quickly becoming a habit, and stared at him.

"I'm not here to cause problems or hit on you or anything," he promised.

"Talk about what?" she finally asked.

"First, I want to apologize for my behaviour. I shouldn't have tried to use you as revenge against my father." Bella flinched at the reminder. "There are really no words for how wrong that was."

"Oh, I have a few words," she snapped.

"I bet you do." He smiled. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leading you to believe I was interested in you and I'm sorry for using you. I'm unbelievably sorry for grabbing you that night and saying all those awful things I said. And I'm truly sorry for helping ruin what you and my dad had."

Bella felt tears sting her eyes. She hadn't cried in almost two weeks. Her tear ducts had finally gotten the much needed break they deserved, but now remembering everything that had happened she couldn't hold them back.

"It was as much my fault as it was yours," she whispered. "You didn't make me do anything."

"No, but I didn't discourage it either."

"Where did you go?" she asked. "No one could get in touch with you. You left Jasper stranded on his own." She shook her head. "Where did you disappear to?"

"Canada." He grinned at her shocked expression. "I have friends in Vancouver and I went there to think."

"Esme told me you and Carlisle are talking again. Things are good?"

"They're on their way to being good. We have a long way to go," he added.

"It's great that you're getting there, though."

"I went to see Kate," he suddenly said. Bella's eyes grew wide and her mouth opened in surprise. "That's pretty much the same expression my dad and Esme had when I told them." He ran his hand through his hair and sighed heavily. "It wasn't good, Bella."

"I'm sorry, Edward."

She sat on the end of the couch and he followed her lead at the other end.

"I didn't want to believe what you told me, so I found her and confronted her."

"What was she like?" Bella asked although she figured she already knew.

"A bitch." He chuckled softly. "She was everything you said she was and more."

"I'm sorry," she repeated.

"I'm not." Edward looked at her and saw the confusion. "I needed to see that side of her to realize how wrong I'd been. If she had been sweet and kind and understanding I wouldn't have believed any of it."

"What did she say to you?"

"She told me how she and dad met, how she started their affair and that I was the biggest mistake she'd ever made and I should have been aborted."

"Oh my God!" _How could a mother be so cruel to her own flesh and blood? _"Edward, that's…. You shouldn't have had to hear that."

"Dad said he had been very bitter and angry at her for all these years until something you told him."

"Me?" Bella practically squeaked. "What did I say?"

"You said that he and Kate both did the best thing possible. You told him that she knew she couldn't give the baby - give me - the life I deserved and needed, so she gave me to the one person who could and who was capable of giving me love when she didn't know how to."

She'd forgotten about that, but the fact that Carlisle remembered, that it made him thinking differently about this woman and the situation, warmed her heart.

"You were right, Bella," Edward told her. "She did the best thing possible by giving me to my dad. She gave me a chance at a real life filled with everything she wasn't capable of."

Bella nodded. "I'm glad you finally see it that way."

"Because of you, Bella. You did this. Everything good that's come out of this is because of you."

"I'm not sure everyone would agree with you," she mumbled thinking of Carlisle.

"Yeah, I'm not sure what his problem is," Edward said. "He should be begging _you_ to take him back."

Bella smiled softly. "I'm just happy you've worked it out. He loves you more than anything."

"That's not easy to see when you've spent half your life resenting someone."

"At least you see it now before it was too late."

"Now, he only needs to wake up and realize the same about you."

Bella stared at him. Was Edward actually okay with her and Carlisle being together?

"I'm not going to object or throw a tantrum if he wants to be with you, Bella," Edward assured her. "It's none of my business."

"You could have told me this over the phone," she told him again.

"I could have." He shrugged. "I was heading back to New York, anyway."

"You've been in Seattle all this time?"

"For about a month now. I went back to New York after my dad and I first talked, but came back out this way to spend some much needed time with him. So, you see," he grinned, "it wasn't that far out of my way."

Bella eyed the brown envelope on the coffee table.

"You should open it," he urged.

"What is it?"

"Something she thought you would like."

Bella reached for the envelope just as her intercom buzzed. Edward lifted an eyebrow at her.

"Expecting company?"

Bella glanced at the clock and saw it was just before seven.

_Crap._

"Kind of. Hang on," Bella told him and hurried to the intercom. "Yes?"

"Hey, it's me," James said.

Bella sighed and buzzed him in. The last thing she wanted was Edward and James to meet.

"Do you have a date?"

Bella jumped, startled by Edward's soundless approach.

"No, it's not a date. It's dinner."

He frowned. "That's a date." James knocked and Edward glared at the door. "What about my dad?"

_Seriously?_

"Your dad," Bella whispered in case James could hear, "hasn't made any effort to call me. I thought you said it's none of your business."

"It's not. I just…" He searched for the right words. "I just know how he feels about you."

"Yeah, him not calling me is pretty obvious to how he feels," she said bitterly.

"It's not like that."

James knocked again and Bella heard him call her name on the opposite side.

"Be nice," she warned.

Edward grinned and held up his hands. Bella silently prayed and opened the door.

"Hey." James looked at her concerned. "You okay? I knocked twice."

"Um, fine."

"Can I come in?" he asked.

"Sorry." She nervously stepped back and James entered, his eyes immediately falling on Edward.

"Oh. You have company," he said sounding annoyed.

"James, this is Edward." She looked at Edward. "Edward, James."

"James?" Edward smirked. "Funny, Bella has a cheating scumbag ex named James."

Bella was sure all colour drained from her face. _This wasn't good._

"That would be me." James glared at him.

Edward looked from James to Bella and rolled his eyes. "Bella, you can't be serious!"

"I don't see how it's any of your concern," James snapped. "Bella, who is this?"

"I'm a friend," Edward answered for her.

"I've been a friend longer." James puffed out his chest.

Edward snorted. "Some friend. Who needs enemies if she has friends like you?"

"Okay, enough!" Bella cried standing in between them. "Edward is Esme's nephew; he's family. And yes, he is a friend." She turned to Edward. "James is a friend who I recently started talking to again. He asked for a second chance and I gave it to him because everyone deserves that much, right, Edward?" He scowled. "Now, if you can't be respectful to each other you can both get out."

James exhaled and Edward unclenched his fists.

"Fine."

"Whatever."

"We do have plans tonight though, Bella," James reminded her.

"I haven't forgotten," she mumbled and glanced at Edward.

"I take that as my cue to leave, right?"

"Yes," James mumbled.

"You can join us," Bella offered. She heard the grumbling from behind her, but ignored James.

Edward grinned, but shook his head. "As tempting as that would be, I have a plane to catch."

She was pretty sure she heard 'good riddance' muttered from James. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

"Did you hear Alice might be moving out your way soon?" Bella smiled.

Edward laughed. "That's all I've heard from Jasper." He momentary looked at James and said to her, "You should come with her."

Bella rolled her eyes knowing he was trying to bait him.

"Bella, we have plans," James practically whined.

Bella pursed her lips to keep from laughing.

"I'll call you later," he promised glaring at James again. He pushed passed him making sure to bump his shoulder and opened the door. Turning back to her one last time he said, "I hope you work things out."

"Thank you, Edward." She quickly hugged him and saw the surprise on his face. He quickly recovered though, smiling back at her, and she had a feeling if she turned around she'd see James glaring at him. He promised to call again and left.

Bella closed the door and turned to face the remaining man.

"Protective much?" he asked.

Bella scowled. "You or him?" She walked passed him and went to the kitchen.

"I'm sorry," James apologized following her. "I guess everyone has a right to be cautious when it comes to my motives."

She nodded, but remained quiet.

"Is there…" He looked uncomfortable. "Was there something between the two of you?"

"No."

"So, he's not the guy?"

"No."

Bella had told James about Carlisle without actually _telling_ him about the man who'd stolen her heart. She explained how they met, that he was related to Esme, that he lived in Washington and that there had been an incident that ruined their relationship.

It was easy to be vague since James didn't ask personal questions. He listened and let her spill whatever details she wanted to talk about, and keep the private ones to herself.

"We don't have to go out tonight, Bella," he told her as she left the kitchen for the living room. "We can order in."

She dropped to the couch and smiled. "You wouldn't mind?"

"Nope. Where are your take out menus?"

"In the drawer by the fridge."

James disappeared and Bella's eyes landed on the envelope still on the coffee table.

"How do you feel about Indian?" he called to her.

"My stomach hurts just from thinking about it," she answered eyeing the brown wrapping.

"Chinese?"

"Not in the mood."

"Mexican?"

"No."

She heard him sigh. "Pizza?"

She grinned. James was possibly the only man on the planet who wasn't a fan of pizza.

"You don't like pizza."

"I don't seem to have a choice since you've vetoed everything else and your cupboards are bare."

She grabbed the envelope as she heard him call in the order and carefully ripped open the seal. She pulled out the folded piece of paper first and recognized Esme's exquisite penmanship.

_I thought you might like this. It's beautiful. _

_ Love, Esme_

Bella furrowed her brow and pulled out the remaining mail. Her breath caught as she saw what it was and tears immediately fell from her eyes.

It was the last picture the wedding photographer had taken. She and Carlisle were gazing at each other, soft smiles on both their lips, lost in each other's eyes. It hadn't been a posed picture. They'd just happened to be looking at each other when he'd snapped the picture, but he'd captured everything they felt for each other in this one shot.

She softly traced Carlisle's face with her fingertip as tears dripped off her chin.

Why didn't life feel normal without him anymore? It wasn't like they'd been together for years, but two short weeks had been enough to turn her world upside down.

"I ordered the veggie deluxe sans mushrooms," James said coming out of the kitchen. "I figure if you're going to make me eat it the crap it might as well be hea- What's wrong?" he asked as soon as he saw her crying.

She motioned to the envelope and said, "Edward brought me something."

James cursed under his breath and sat beside her. "I knew he was up to no good. What did he do?"

"Nothing." Bella shook her head. "It's from Esme."

James peeked at the picture in her lap and narrowed her eyes at her. "Is that the guy?" She nodded. "Bella, he's old-"

"I swear, James, if you say old I'll do to you what I should have done a year ago!" she threatened.

"Older," he quickly corrected. "You didn't let me finish. He's _older _than I would have thought."

"Age is just a number."

"Apparently," he muttered causing her to shoot him a glare. "The way you spoke about him I just assumed he was your age. I never thought you'd develop feelings for someone that much older."

"He only forty-one, James, not eighty-one like you make him sound."

He gently took the picture from her and looked at it more closely.

"You look happy, Bella," he observed.

"I was happy."

"What does your bodyguard think of this?"

"My bodyguard?"

"Edward," he sneered.

"Oh." Bella blushed. "Um, well, Carlisle is his dad."

"Wait. Is this Esme's brother?"

"Uh huh."

"Wow." He grinned. "What does she think of this? And your dad?"

"She was concerned at first, but fully supports it now. Charlie…wasn't happy about it."

"I bet," he murmured still looking at the picture. "What happened?" He looked at her. "You said there was an incident, but you never explained what."

"I made a huge mistake."

"Must have been a pretty bad one to screw up something that looks this good," he commented.

"It was." She sighed. "He had broken things off because he thought it would be best for me and I was drinking and…made a move on Edward."

James tried to hide his smile, but failed. "Tequila?"

She rolled her eyes. "No, wine. But two bottles will cloud your judgment just as easily as tequila."

"Hey, I'm the last one that's going to judge you, Bella."

"I know."

"Is that why you gave me your number?" he asked thoughtfully.

"Because you wouldn't judge me?"

"Because you felt like if you couldn't give me a second chance you didn't deserve one either."

It still amazed her how well James could read her even after all this time.

"Is that selfish?" she asked.

"If it is then I'm glad your selfish, Bella." He smiled at her. "You don't know how happy I am that you let me back into your life."

The way he was looking at her suddenly made her uncomfortable. It wasn't that he was looking at her any different than he had the past two weeks, but she didn't want him thinking he _could_ look at her differently.

"James," she started only to stop. Was she jumping the gun? He hadn't done anything to indicate he wanted more than friendship with her.

"Yes?" He set the picture on the coffee table and reached for her hand.

His touch still felt the same. Not intimate at all, only comforting. But what if he started to think there could be more to that simple touch? She didn't want to lead him on or give him false hope, especially when he'd been nothing but wonderful to her.

"James," she tried again. "I can't do this."

He looked confused. "Do what?"

"You and me. You've been great and I really am glad I gave you my number, but this can't be more than friendship."

He smiled suddenly looking very amused. "Have I asked for more?"

"No, but I don't want you to get the wrong idea," she explained. "I want to be your friend, but I can't be more than that."

"Bella, I don't want more than that."

She jerked her head up and stared at him. "You don't?"

"No." He laughed at her expression. "You almost look disappointed."

"I'm not sure my ego can stand much more bruising," she moaned, embarrassed. "You're the second person to tell me in two months that you don't want me."

"Who was the first?"

"Edward." She bit her lip. "Third if you count Carlisle's rejection."

"Bella, it's not that I wouldn't want to be with you again," he explained. "But the pain I caused you is hard to come back from and we're doing great right now. I don't want to lose you again."

"James-"

"Besides, I'm seeing someone," he added with a grin.

"You are?" _Why hadn't he said anything? _Now she really felt like an idiot.

"For a few months now," he said.

"Why didn't you tell me? And how can you spend so much time with me if you have a girlfriend?" she questioned.

"Well, right now she's out of town on business."

"When did she leave?"

"Couple of days ago." He shrugged. "She knows about you, so don't worry I'm not sneaking around."

"You told her about me?" He nodded. "Everything about our past too?"

"Yes. I told her I felt like you needed someone right now and she encouraged me to call you."

"She did?" _What woman was okay with her boyfriend hanging out with an ex?_

"She's really great, Bella. As much as I wanted to call you, I wouldn't have if it would have made her uncomfortable."

"Wow, you really have grown up," Bella teased.

"Told you." He nudged her with his shoulder. "I'd like for you two to meet."

"I'd like that." Bella smiled. "What's her name?"

"Victoria."

Secretly she was relieved it wasn't the skank he'd cheated on her with. That she didn't think she'd be able to handle all too well. "I'm glad you're happy."

"You're glad we didn't have to have that awkward 'it's not you it's me' cliché conversation."

She laughed. "That too."

"What about you?" he asked. "What are you going to do to get your happiness back?"

Bella looked at the picture sadly. "I don't know if there's anything I can do."

"Okay, forget about him." James put the envelope over the picture. "He's no longer part of the equation. What's going to make Bella happy?"

"I can't forget about him, James. The last time I was happy was with him."

"So, you're saying you can't be happy without him?"

"I could be, but I don't want to be," she admitted.

"Bella," James said sounding frustrated, "you have one of two choices. You either go after him, or you go in the opposite direction and move on."

"I haven't heard from him in two months, James. What does that tell you?"

"It tells me he's a cowered. He walked out on you without talking about it and then left everything up in the air."

"I think his silence says more than his words ever could," Bella said sadly.

The intercom buzzed and James went to let the delivery guy in. Bella moved the envelope off the picture and stared at the two people who were positively glowing.

She wanted that feeling back more than anything. But how much more rejection could she take? He wasn't banging down her door to get her back and she'd done all she felt she could do to get him to talk to her. If he did need time, wasn't two months long enough? Would he talk to her now if she called him?

"_You have one of two choices. You either go after him, or you go in the opposite direction and move on."_

By the time James returned with the pizza she knew what she had to do.

******

Alice arrived home just as James was leaving. She snubbed him and went to her bedroom where she informed Bella she'd stay until 'the fucker left'.

Bella started to apologize, but he stopped her. "I don't expect to win over Alice any time soon." He smiled down at her as his arms wrapped around her for a hug. "Good luck, Bella."

"Thanks." After he left Bella stormed into Alice's room ready to attack. "Did you know Edward was in Phoenix?" she demanded.

"Not until I ran into when I was leaving," she said not bothering to look up from her magazine.

"Jasper never said anything?"

"We don't talk about Edward."

"I don't think you talk about much with all the moaning going on."

Alice rolled her eyes. "What did he want?"

Bella walked further into the room until she was standing at the foot of the bed.

"James or Edward?"

Alice scowled. "I know what James wants."

"You couldn't be more wrong."

"Oh, please."

"He actually has a girlfriend."

"Bella, the palm sisters don't count."

"Alice,-"

"Forget about James," Alice said impatiently. "What did Edward want?"

"To apologize." Bella sighed and sat on the bed as she told Alice about the visit. "And then he and James had this mini testosterone show down-"

"Were there blows?" Alice asked excitedly.

"No." She pouted. "Oh! And the picture-"

"What picture?" she asked brightening up immediately.

Bella grabbed her hand and tugged her to the living room.

"That picture." Bella pointed at the coffee table.

Alice picked it up and sat on the couch, folding her legs under her.

"Bella," she breathed, "how can you turn your back on this?"

"I didn't."

"You're not trying to fight for it either."

"I can't force him to want me, Alice!"

"Bella, you left one message two months ago."

"That's more than what he's attempted," Bella muttered.

"Maybe he just needed time," Alice said. "He may want to call you now, but thinks it's too late. Maybe if you called him again it might be different."

"Why should I be the one to reach out?"

"Because you were the one that messed it up," Alice answered.

_What the hell?_

"Alice…"

"I'm sorry, Bella. I know this is hard for you, but it has to be hard for him, too."

"I know what I did was wrong, but-"

"I know." Alice reached over and squeezed her hand. "And it's not all your fault either. Carlisle and Edward both have a part in it, but you were willing to bone his son, Bella. That could take some time to get over."

"You were the one that said I shouldn't be waiting around for his call!" Bella reminded her.

"And you shouldn't," Alice agreed. "But that doesn't mean you should just give up either."

Bella groaned and laid her head against the back of the couch.

"I think I liked you better before Jasper and the whole 'love conquers all' outlook you have," she muttered.

Alice laughed. "It will though! I know it will."

Bella opened one eye and peeked at her. "I'm not so sure."

"Why don't you come to New York with me tomorrow," Alice suggested.

That prompted Bella to open both eyes. "You're going tomorrow?"

Alice nodded. "To look at apartments."

"So, you're really doing this," Bella said softly.

"You can come with me. Rent is always cheaper with multiples."

"So we can both live in an apartment the size of our bedroom?" Bella frowned. "New York is expensive."

"This is why we'd have roommates." Alice grinned.

"Roommates?"

"I sort of agreed to move in with Edward and Jasper."

"You sort of agreed?" Bella rolled her eyes. "Just a few hours ago you were saying you wanted to take it slow."

"I do! But there will be three of us living there, four if you come, so we won't technically be living together."

"You know that makes no sense at all, right?"

"Yeah, I know." Alice shrugged. "But you can still look at apartments with us."

"I have work." Bella eyed her. "And I thought you did, too."

"I switched a couple of shifts. My boss loves me." Alice batted her eyelashes.

"Don't you think it may be awkward living with both of them?"

"I can handle awkwardness if it gets me to New York, Bella," Alice told her.

"And closer to Jasper." Bella smirked.

"He's a bonus." Alice winked and then grew serious. "We do have to decide what we're going to do with this place. Can you afford to keep it on your own?" Bella shook her head. "I'll call them tomorrow and explain the situation."

"Won't they be mad?"

Alice shrugged. "They're only gone for the summer, anyway. They probably won't even try to find someone else. They only agreed to let us because they know my parents." Alice looked at her. "What are you going to do, Bella?"

"I could move back in with my mom."

"Or?" Alice asked sensing there was more. Bella bit her lip. "Well?"

"I was thinking of what Renee suggested," she admitted.

"About moving to Washington?"

"Maybe I need something different, too." Bella looked at her hands.

"Oh, Bella!" Alice squealed and threw her arms around her neck. "You're going after him!"

"I'm going to Washington."

"Shut up! You're so going after him!"

Bella couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm, but her heart pounded like a jack hammer at the thought of putting herself out there again.

"I'll drive you to the airport tomorrow," Bella offered before they went to bed that night.

"That's okay. I have an early flight and will just call a cab."

Bella was woken up the next morning anyway from Alice's banging. A peek at the clock said it wasn't quite seven yet and Bella groaned. She heard Alice swearing and what sounded like heavy breathing. Curiosity overrode sleep and Bella dragged her butt from bed and shuffled to Alice's bedroom. She burst out laughing at the sight in front of her.

Alice was perched on top of her suitcase trying to zip it closed, cursing like a sailor when the zipper wouldn't budge.

"How long are you going to be gone for?" Bella asked.

"Two days," Alice grunted fighting to stuff clothes into the already bulging sides.

"And you need all that? Forget it," Bella said when Alice opened her mouth to answer. "For a minute I forgot who I was talking to."

"Can you help?" Alice snipped. "The taxi will be here soon."

"Can you unpack some of that?"

"No."

Bella sighed. "I didn't think so. Move. I'll sit on it."

"Why?"

"Because I'm bigger, now move!"

Alice slipped off the suitcase and Bella knelt on it. After a few minutes of tug of war, Alice finally managed to close the damn thing. Bella wasn't sure the zipper would hold, though. A funny image of Alice running through the airport and her suitcase exploding everywhere popped into her head and she giggled.

"What's so funny?" Alice demanded.

"Nothing." Bella giggled again. "You know, if you took two you wouldn't have this problem."

"I don't want to haul around two," Alice groaned as she dragged the bag out of the room.

Bella yawned and followed her to the entry way.

"Crap!" Alice cried. "I forgot my makeup bag."

"Oh, that's definitely going to send you over the weight restriction," Bella teased.

Alice stuck her tongue out just as the intercom buzzed.

"It's about time you got here," she snapped at the poor cabby on the other end. "I need help with my bags." She clicked it off and told Bella to let him in as she hurried back to her bedroom.

_Jasper and Edward had no idea what they were getting themselves into. _

The knock on the door was soft and Bella figured the man must fear what waited for him. The thought sent Bella into another round of giggles, but when she opened the door the laughter died on her lips.

"Uh, hi."

Bella opened her mouth, but no sound came out.

"Okay. I only have the one bag," Alice instructed coming back to the door. "It's that one-Holy shit!" She stopped short when she saw who Bella saw.

"Hello, Alice." Carlisle smiled nervously.

Alice saw him, too. This meant he wasn't a figment of her sleep deprived mind.

_Oh my God! _

He was actually standing in front of her….and she'd just gotten out of bed. Bed head hair, ratty old sweat pants and a t-shirt that had a huge mustard stain on from years ago.

_Fuck!_

Alice looked from her to him, bouncing on her toes, a huge smile plastered on her face. When the buzzer rang again she quickly told the cab driver she'd be right down and threw Bella a don't-screw-this-up look.

"Do you need help?" Carlisle asked.

"No, I'm fine." She grinned at him and hugged Bella. "You look like shit. At least brush your teeth," she hissed in her ear before pulling away.

"Have fun," Bella managed to mutter while still staring at the man in front of her.

"You, too." She winked as she shut the door leaving them alone.

Carlisle shifted uncomfortably as his eyes darted around the apartment.

"Um-"

"Can you give me a minute?" Bella asked already backing away before he answered.

He nodded. "Of course."

She mumbled something to him about making himself comfortable and hurried towards the bathroom. She shut the door a little too hard, making it sound as if she'd slammed it. She cringed at the echo and cursed her nerves for getting the better of her.

It was just Carlisle after all. She'd been alone with the man dozens of times.

_That was before he walked away and broke your heart._

Bella frowned. What did he want? Why was he here now?

She quickly ran a comb through her hair and brushed her teeth. She spied one of Alice's tanks hanging on the back of the door and yanked off her stained t-shirt trading it for the clean tank. It was too short and exposed a sliver of her belly, but it was better than her own.

She grabbed for the door and noticed her hands shaking. She suddenly realized everything was riding on this visit. If they couldn't get passed what had happened there was no hope for a future.

_No pressure, Swan_.

Trying to clam her pounding heart she took a deep breath and opened the door. Carlisle was standing by the living room window that showed a beautiful view of the neighbourhood. His hands were in the pockets of his tan pants, his legs slightly apart and his white polo shirt wasn't tucked in. He looked as if he'd gotten dressed in a hurry.

Bella wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around him and slide her hands under his shirt. The way his skin felt was forever burned in her memory, but it had been way too long since she'd touched him.

He heard her approach and turned around.

"This is nice," he said indicating the apartment.

Why did people always comment on the décor in awkward situations?

"Thanks." Bella crossed her arms to keep from reaching out to him. "It worked while we needed it."

"Needed?" He arched an eyebrow.

"Alice is moving to New York and I can't afford it on my own." She shrugged. "Time to move again."

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"Home," she replied, not explaining where home was.

"Oh." She could have sworn she saw his face fall. "I just thought…with Alice leaving…maybe you'd want a change also."

Bella watched him for a few minutes before answering. "Alice asked me to move with her, but I don't want to follow her around New York."

"It doesn't have to be New York," Carlisle said softly.

Bella was almost afraid to ask what he meant for fear the answer wouldn't be what she wanted to hear.

"What are you doing here, Carlisle?" she asked instead. "I haven't heard from you in months."

"Eight weeks," he corrected as if it made a difference.

"Did Esme tell you were I was?"

"She told me you moved, but it was Edward that gave me your address."

"Edward?"

He nodded. "Esme doesn't know I'm here. It was an…impulse decision," he added smiling shyly.

Her stomach fluttered at that smile. She'd missed that smile.

"Why?"

Now he looked embarrassed. He turned away from her and looked out the window again.

"Edward called me yesterday and told me he saw you," he revealed. "He said you two had a fairly good conversation."

"It was fine, I guess. He told me about meeting Kate. It sounded like it was hard for him," she added softly.

"It was," he agreed. "He said when he was leaving though, he ran into James…and that you had a date planned with him." His voice grew low.

Bella couldn't believe what she was hearing. He'd come here because of James?

"Are you here because you're jealous?" Her heart gave a little leap at that. If he was jealous that meant he still had some feelings, right?

He laughed. "That sounds so silly to hear said out loud." He looked at her. "But, yes."

"I haven't heard a word from you in all this time and you come all the way here because you were jealous I had dinner plans with James?" She had to say it out loud one more time to make sure she got it right. That was…. What was that?

"I can't even fathom how you could agree to go out with him after what he did to you," Carlisle cried.

"Everyone deserves a second chance," Bella whispered.

"But James?" Carlisle shook his head. "Didn't he hurt you enough the first time?"

"Why do you care?" Bella cried suddenly angry. "You pretty much wrote me off!"

"I didn't write you off!"

"Oh, really?" She cocked her hip to the side. "You walked out on me, and I understand why, but then you never even tried to talk about it later. You ignored any attempt _I_ made to contact you and now all of a sudden you're worried about whom I choose to involve in my life!

"I know it's crazy," he agreed. "I'm sorry."

Bella rolled her eyes, muttering, "You're sorry."

"I was angry and hurt and I didn't know what to feel, or to think even."

"I understand, but you could have returned my calls after awhile." She bit her quivering lip as she felt tears threaten to spill. "I know I hurt you, Carlisle, and I will regret that forever, but it's not all my fault."

"Edward told me what he wanted to do, and he said you knew; that he told you that night."

Bella swallowed over the lump in her throat and nodded. "Yes."

"You knew and you never said a thing. When I asked if you knew why he didn't confront us about being together, you said you didn't know."

"I didn't know how you would react to knowing he wanted to hurt you like that." Bella wiped the tears off her cheeks. "I'd already caused so much trouble and I didn't want to add another thing for you to be pissed at him for."

"So, you protected him?" he inquired, asking the same question Esme had.

"No!" She was so sick of defending her actions. "I wanted to protect both of you! I didn't want anymore hostility between the two of you because of me! I never thought he would tell you."

"Well, he did." Carlisle inhaled deeply. "And I never thought he would do something like that, that he would put you in that position. It was wrong and I'm glad he realized it before it was too late."

"Wasn't it too late?" Bella asked softly. "It ruined us."

The pained looked on Carlisle's face was too much for her and she had to look away.

"I know I put this all into motion when I ended things that night," Carlisle admitted.

"That didn't help," Bella agreed.

"I shouldn't have taken it upon myself to make that decision for you," he continued. "It's just…" He sighed and ran his hand through his hair just like Edward. "Ever since my father's illness and death I've felt the need to protect everyone I love."

Bella watched him and remained silent. He'd only mentioned his father once in passing at the wedding and she remembered he'd told her his decision to become a doctor was because of his death.

"My parents were as different as night and day," he recalled. "My mother was a free spirit, very much a hippie. My dad was the complete opposite, very structured and career focused. How they managed to stay together for as long as they did amazed everyone." He smiled fondly at the memory playing in his mind.

"Your parents divorced?"

He looked at her and shook his head. "No, not exactly. When my dad became ill my mother didn't know how to care for him. She wasn't the type to care for someone when they fell sick, or care for them at all really. Oh, she loved us all," Carlisle assured her when he saw the confused expression on her face, "but she was too…erratic or unreliable, I guess would be good words to describe her, to be a wife and mother."

Bella moved to sit on the couch and wrapped her arms around her legs. "What happened?"

"My dad needed a lot of help," Carlisle continued as he sat next to her. He wasn't too close, but close enough if Bella reached out she'd be able to touch him. "By the time they discovered what was wrong the cancer had spread too much. They offered him whatever they could, but he denied it all saying he only wanted to spend what time he had left with his family. He became sicker and weaker fairly quickly and my mom didn't know how to deal with it." He glanced at Bella only to quickly look away again.

"She left?"

"I was the one that cared for him, that helped him with everything he needed," Carlisle told her instead of answering. "It was too much for Esme to witness, she really was too young."

"So were you," Bella said.

"But I was the oldest, I was the son. It was my obligation to bare that kind of responsibility."

"It should have been your mom's responsibility," Bella said softly.

"She became too withdrawn and depressed over it all and one day she decided she had to leave. Actually, I think my dad may have even asked her to leave."

"Why?"

"He loved her that much and he saw what it was doing to her."

"So you get your selflessness from your father," Bella commented smiling at him softly.

Carlisle smiled back. "It would seem like we have a lot in common." The smile quickly left his face when he began speaking again. "I was the only one with him when he died and after the funeral mom went a bit…mad. Even though she couldn't stand to see him suffer she did love him very much. She had to be hospitalized a few years after his death and she just recently passed away as well a few years back."

"Oh, Carlisle." Without thinking she reached for his hand and he held onto hers as if it were a lifeline. "I'm sorry."

"Both our parents were gone and even though Esme and I both had to grow up faster because of it, I still felt like I had to look after her," he told her. "I made sure she finished high school and we got a place together close to college when I started talking classes. And then I met Kate and for the first time in years I felt free."

"From what Edward said about her I don't understand how you could be with someone like her. She's so cruel and cold. She's everything you're not."

He smiled. "She wasn't like that when we met. She was kind and sympathetic when she learned my family's history. The Kate that emerged when she got pregnant was a stranger to me."

"What did Esme think of your affair with her?" Bella asked the question that had played on her mind for months now.

"She didn't know," Carlisle replied. "Oh, she knew there was someone, but she never would have guessed it was a professor, much less a married professor."

"And when she found out?"

"She was disappointed in me," he said sadly.

"What was her reaction when she found out about Edward meeting Kate?"

Carlisle grinned. "Charlie had to practically restrain her from driving to San Diego to rip her hair out."

Bella smiled at the image. Carlisle's grin slowly faded from his face as he reached out to stroke her cheek. Bella closed her eyes and leaned into his touch.

"I've missed that smile," he whispered, voicing the same thoughts she had earlier. "I've missed you, Isabella."

Her heart could have burst from happiness at that moment. There was nothing sweeter than the sound of her name coming from his lips.

"I've missed you, too," she whispered back as tears threatened to spill forth again.

"I should have called; I should have tried to talk to you about it." His hand dropped from her face and she opened her eyes at the loss. "And now it's too late."

"Too late?" Her heart dropped to her stomach. Had he found someone else?

"I waited too long and now you've moved on. When Edward told me you were back with James I left the second I could get away. I rescheduled surgeries and told my boss I had a family emergency, but…" He let his sentence trail off. "I know I only have myself to blame."

"I think James has really changed," she said. "He realizes his mistakes and doesn't want to repeat them again." Bella smiled. "Which I hope is true for his girlfriend's sake."

Carlisle narrowed his eyes at her. "His girlfriend's sake?"

"James is dating someone," she told him. "We've been hanging out, but only as friends."

"But Edward said-"

"Edward has a tendency not to listen and to jump to conclusions. Although, I can't say I won't thank him since it finally brought you to your sense."

"You sound like Esme." He grinned.

"So, is jealously the only reason you came here?" she asked coyly.

"No." He moved closer to her on the couch until they were mere inches apart. "It did wake me up and make me realize what I was about to lose, though."

"So, why else?"

"I missed you, Isabella," he told her again leaning closer. "I missed this." He slowly brought his lips to hers and moved his body closer. With one arm on the back of the couch and the other resting on the arm around her he had her almost trapped.

Not that she cared. Bella opened her mouth inviting his tongue to slide in and tangle with hers. Her hands moved up to his chest and grabbed his shirt in her fists. All she wanted to do was pull him on top of her and give herself to him, but suddenly her mothers words came back to her.

Bella flattened her palms on his chest and gently pushed him away.

"What's wrong?" He looked confused and worried about her reaction.

"I need some answers before I can do this," she said.

"Okay." He pulled back, but held her hands to keep some contact between them.

"What happened with Edward was as much my fault as it was his. He may have led me to believe that he was interested in me, but no one forced me to make a move on him." Bella glanced at Carlisle. "I know it must be hard for you to hear, but I didn't want Edward. I just wanted someone who wanted me in that moment."

"I know," Carlisle said. "Edward explained to me that it wasn't about physical attraction for either of you."

"It wasn't," Bella said relieved he believed it. "And I don't believe you'd use it against me, or Edward for that matter, in the future as a guilt trip, but I don't want you to constantly question everything either."

Carlisle cocked his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"I don't want you to see things that aren't there," she explained. "If Edward and I happen to look at each other or leave the room at the same time I don't want you to worry that we're sneaking off together. I don't want you to think there's something going on between us."

"Isabella,-"

"I don't ever want you to question my love for you, Carlisle," she said softly. "And I can't just be 'Bella' to you."

"Isabella," he said again, "I wouldn't be here if I didn't think I could trust you. I wouldn't have come if I thought there could ever be something between you and Edward." He smiled. "I believe both of you when you say you only turned to him for comfort and he did what he did for his own reasons. I trust you, and I trust him, and you could never be 'just Bella' to me."

"It took you so long to realize that I'm just afraid you're here for the wrong reasons."

"What wrong reasons?"

"Maybe you came because of some ego thing towards James and you haven't really thought about being together again."

"I've thought of nothing else," he assured her. "I've wanted to call so many times, but I needed to be sure. And I'm sure, Isabella. I've never been surer of anything in my life."

"Charlie told me what you told him the day of the wedding," Bella said.

Carlisle looked down at their joined hands as he lightly brushed his thumb back and forth over her skin.

"I hope you're not mad I spoke to him."

"I was surprised by what you told him, but not mad."

"Why were you surprised?" he asked.

"Besides that Charlie threatened to take you hunting when he just thought there was something going on," she teased with a smile. "I was surprised that you told him you were falling in love with me that soon."

"Isabella, as trite as it may sound, I think I fell in love with you the moment I laid eyes on you."

She stared at him not knowing quite what to say. He looked at her and smiled, pulling her to him again for a soft kiss.

"I love you, Isabella," he murmured against her lips.

"I love you, too."

Bella wrapped her arms around his neck as his arms encircled her waist, slowly lowering her back to the couch.

He fit himself between her legs and she felt his arousal pressed against her thigh. She wiggled against him causing him to moan into her mouth.

"You have no idea how much I've missed you, Isabella," he told her.

"I think I have a pretty good idea," she teased wiggling again. "And I've missed you just as much."

His mouth found her ear as she slid her hands underneath his shirt. His skin was just as warm and smooth as she remembered. She slowly raked her nails up his back and he shuddered beneath her touch. She grasped the hem of his shirt and lifted it over his head. She pressed her body to his bare skin, loving the warmth it filled her with.

His hand snaked under her tank and rested on her breast, cupping it he gave a gentle squeeze. Her nipple pebbled beneath his touch and stabbed at his palm.

As he kissed down her neck and over her collarbone, Bella unfastened his pants. He pushed her shirt up exposing her naked chest to him and wrapped his lips around her other nipple, swirling his tongue around it. Bella gasped and bucked under him, pushing her hips into his. He groaned as his restricted cock pulsed against her crotch.

"Please, Carlisle," she begged.

His hands rested on her hips as his teeth scrapped her tender flesh and she hissed out a breath. Carlisle dipped his hand beneath the waistband of her sweats and found her bare to his searching hand. His finger circled her clit, flicking it once…twice…three times.

"Oh!" Bella gasped and dug her fingers into his shoulders.

Lazily, he dragged his finger down her wet folds, teasing her center with the slight touch. Bella whimpered beneath him and thrust her hips. She felt him smile on her skin and whisper, "You're so wet for me, Isabella."

"Always," she panted. "Only for you."

He groaned as he plunged his digits into her and her muscles clamped around them.

"Please," she murmured. "Please, Carlisle, I want you. I need you. Now."

He pushed his pants and briefs out of the way and nestled back against her. The head of his cock probed her entrance and she widened her legs granting him access.

"Forever," he growled as he slipped deep inside her.

"Yes!" Bella cried and locked her ankles around his ass, pulling him deeper inside her.

He slowly thrust back and forth as his lips pressed to hers. Their tongues mated as they tasted each other, their teeth pulling at each other's tender flesh. Carlisle gently took Bella's hands from around his neck and laced their fingers together, holding them above her head as he steadily increased his movements.

He moved his head so his mouth was close to her ear, his heavy breathing tickled her lobe and she sighed.

"I love you," he panted into her ear. "Forever, Isabella."

"Forever," she breathed back.

He swivelled his hips and Bella screamed, shuddering beneath him as she exploded around his hard length. Seconds later Carlisle groaned into her neck as his hips bucked one last time, releasing his own pleasure deep inside her.

They lay quiet and still, wrapped in each other arms for what seemed like hours after, but Bella was sure were only minutes.

When he spoke his voice was low and hoarse. "You can't go home, Isabella."

She softly smiled. "Why not?"

"Because I need you with me," he said. "I need to see you everyday. I need to be able to hold you whenever I want. We can make my house our home."

"What if I want to stay in Phoenix?" she asked.

He was quiet and she was suddenly afraid she'd asked the wrong thing.

"I can see about being transferred," he finally answered, "although I'd be in breach of my contract, so I may be out of a job." He chuckled and then sighed, pulling her body closer to his. "You gave me my son back, Isabella. I can never repay you for that, but I can spend the rest of my life trying to show you how much I love you and as long as I'm with you I don't care if I'm unemployed."

"I care," she said looking at him. "You love your job."

"I love you more," he replied.

"That's why I wouldn't ask you to give it up."

"But it's in Seattle."

She grinned. "Silly man. Where do you think home is?"

"Tell me." He nuzzled her neck.

"Right here," she said placing her hand on his heart. "Anywhere you are I'll be."

"Forever," he murmured against her jaw.

She closed her eyes as her body began to respond to his touch again.

"Forever," she repeated as his lips found hers and brought her home.

_**A/N: *peeks out from hiding place* Give me your worst...or your best! Was it what you hoped for? Oh my God, I brought James back! I know, I know in the beginning he was seen as the enemy, but she needed that closure in the end. And yes, I will admit that it was also because of a personal experience that recently happened that I had a change of heart about our cheating douche bag. But he's not such a douche, is he?**_

_**I'd like to address the issue with Kate. I am not against adoption in the the least! I do not think Kate was wrong for giving Edward to Carlisle. I don't agree with the way she treated him, though. That's the only thing that makes her a bitch. Not what she did, but how she treated him.**_

_**Remember, there is an Epi to follow and it will be posted as soon as this one is validated. If you want to read more of what I may write in the future, don't forget to add me to your favourite authors.**_

_**And now, because you'll need something to keep you occupied that this is over, a few fic recommendations:**_

_**Love In The Mirror Room by forbiddenkisses - I just started reading this and it rocks. I've never read a Bella/James fic before, but she has me rooting for the villain. **_

_**My Family and I by RedSummer - Yes, I've told you all about this one before, but it's worth mentioning again. READ IT!**_

_**Edward Wallbanger by feathers_mmmm - In case you've been hiding under a rock and haven't found this fic yet you should be ashamed! lol It's laugh your ass off funny and you'll become addicted to it like your own personal brand of heroin ;)**_

_**Thank you again for this amazing ride! Now, review and leave me some of that sweet sugar! **_


	19. Epilogue: 1095 Days Later

_**Here it is, folks. The Epilogue you've been waiting for. I will say I'm actually pretty happy with how it turned out.**_

_**Enjoy**_

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the original story line created.**_

"I look like a sausage!" Bella cried as she stared at her reflection in the full length mirror, turning this way and that. "And not one of those cute little breakfast sausages, but a huge sausage!"

"Bella, you look beautiful," Alice told her with a roll of her eyes.

"I told you to get a bigger size," she continued to whine. "Why didn't listen to me?"

"There is nothing wrong with the dress size," Alice sighed and smoothed down the back of Bella's dress.

"Why did I agree to this?" Bella muttered more to herself than Alice.

"Because you love me," Alice answered and grinned.

"If this doesn't prove it nothing will. I feel so…so out of place."

"No one even cares," Alice assured her.

"I know, but I was uncomfortable with it before. Now I feel like the elephant in the room. Literally."

Alice laughed as Charlotte, her and Jasper's friend from New York, entered the room and smiled at both of them.

"Okay, we're good to go," she announced.

"How many people are out there?" Bella asked.

"Just a few," Alice replied before Charlotte could.

"About a hundred," Charlotte added.

Bella shot a panicked look at Alice who shook her head. "There is not."

She realized she couldn't be mad at her best friend who stood next to her positively glowing. "I really am happy for you." She wrapped her arms around her. "For both of you," she added.

Alice pulled away as tears made her eyes shine.

"Okay, none of that!" Charlotte declared handing Bella her flowers. "You'll smear all my hard work."

Bella chuckled. She was like an Alice clone. She gave Alice's hand one last squeeze just as the music started to play.

Bella took a deep breath and started her slow trek down the aisle. She locked eyes with Carlisle and felt the butterflies in her stomach start to settle. He beamed at her, his face lit with love and devotion. Charlie had been right when he'd told her three years ago that if there was ever a man in the room that looked more in love it was Carlisle.

Her gaze skipped to Edward who looked more peaceful and content than she'd seen him in a long time. She vaguely wondered how much of it had to do with the brunette that had been on his arm for the passed year.

Finally, her eyes landed on Jasper who stood anxiously waiting his bride. He grinned at her and then at Charlotte as they took their place at the alter. The wedding march began to play and his attention was immediately pulled to the vision in white floating towards him.

Bella shot glances at Carlisle, who kept his eyes glued to her almost the entire time, as she listened to her friends exchange vows. A new set of butterflies erupted in her stomach with each stolen glance between them. Even after all this time he still had the ability to turn her on with just one look.

An excited squeal startled Bella as she heard the minister pronounce Jasper and Alice man and wife and it took her a minute to realize it had come from the tiny pixie in front of her. She laughed with everyone else as Alice launched herself into her new husband's arms for their first married kiss.

After pictures, dinner and cake cutting, Carlisle pulled her from her seat and led her onto the dance floor.

"You look beautiful," he whispered into her ear, holding her as close as possible.

"Thank you." She smiled up at him as he slowly spun them around. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the light bounce off her own wedding set making it sparkle.

She closed her eyes as the memories flooded her mind….

_They had been living together for eighteen months the night Carlisle came home and said they needed to talk._

_Bella had moved to Seattle with him almost immediately after he'd shown up at her apartment that day. They made plans with a moving company and started boxing her belongings that very night._

_All she wanted was to start her life with Carlisle. They had been given another chance and she wasn't going to waste a second of it this time._

_Of course living together wasn't always easy. There were little things about each of them that the other found annoying. She wasn't fond of him reading medical journals in bed. The night light bothered her and made it impossible for her to fall asleep. And he found it equally annoying that she hung her towel to dry over the curtain rod rather than the towel rack._

_The little interruptions from his beeper were another thing she had to get use to. She knew his job was important and he couldn't ignore it when it went off, but sometimes she had thoughts of flushing the damn thing down the toilet. If he didn't hear it beeping he technically wasn't ignoring it, right? She did restrain herself though, and to Carlisle's credit, he did make every day he had off count. _

_They took cooking classes together, which is how they discovered Bella was a far better cook than he was. They had picnics in the park, went on boat rides, toured museums and he introduced her to her first opera. They also enjoyed quiet evenings at home, curled up on the couch together watching a movie. He made sure they had that time together, which is how she learned to live with the beeper._

_They slowly fell into a routine. About eight months after moving to Seattle, Bella started a photography class and soon found a passion for pictures. Six months after that, she applied to a local magazine that shot maternity photographs and were looking for a photographer. _

_She met Irina Smith a week after applying and was offered the job within twenty minutes of showing her some of her work._

_Bella loved her job._

_On that particular night, she was looking through some of the shots she'd recently taken when Carlisle came home looking nervous. She immediately noticed that he was far jittery than she ever remembered seeing him._

"_What's wrong?" she asked when he sat down beside her._

"_I need to tell you something," he said._

_Dread filled her stomach as she slowly nodded her head, unable to find the words to speak._

"_There's this woman at work," he began. "A nurse."_

_Oh dear God. Bella's heart dropped and she couldn't breath. She felt the bile rise in her throat and she swallowed trying to keep it down._

"_She's been…flirting with me," he continued. "It's all been fairly innocent until today."_

"_What happened?" Bella demanded finding her voice._

"_She…" Carlisle looked at her and grimaced. "She smacked my backside while walking by."_

"_She what?!" Bella cried as rage instantly filled her. She wanted to break every finger in the bitch's hand. No. She wanted to rip off every finger. "That's sexual harassment! Did you tell the chief?"_

"_No."_

"_No? Why the hell not?"_

"_I wanted to talk to you first about an idea I had." He smiled. "I think it will help."_

"_What idea?" Bella narrows her eyes at him._

"_Well, everyone at the hospital knows about you, about us-"_

"_Which is why they shouldn't be smacking your ass!" she cried._

_Carlisle fought the grin that wanted to take over his lips. "True, but maybe they think because there's no claim on me-"_

"_No what?" Bella stood up and glared down at him. "Are you defending this behaviour?"_

"_No," he quickly assured her. "I'm just saying maybe if they saw how much I love you, they wouldn't act this way."_

_What the hell was he talking about?_

"_What the hell are you talking about?" Bella cried voicing her thoughts. "Saw how much you love me?" She crossed her arms. "So, what? Do you want me to come around the hospital more often? Are you asking me to mark my territory? I'm not a cat, Carlisle!"_

_He pressed his lips together to keep from laughing._

"_This isn't funny!" she told him. "You tell me some woman smacked your ass and it's okay because I haven't shown up to "claim you"? That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! We live together! We have for a year and a half! What else can I do to keep Skanky McSkankerson's hands off you?"_

"_Marry me."_

_Bella's mouth opened and closed and for a minute she forgot how to breathe. She stared at his grinning face as she tried to comprehend what he'd just said._

_Had he just…proposed?_

_No, that wasn't a proposal. It was a suggestion._

_Wasn't it?_

_His eyes twinkled as he got down on one knee in front of her and pulled a ring box from his pocket._

_Oh. My. God._

_She was about to hyperventilate. _

"_What. Are. You. Doing?" she slowly asked pausing between each word._

"_There is no nurse." He grinned._

"_Huh?"_

"_I don't want you to think I'm doing this because of some overly touchy woman. There is no nurse.," he repeated. "I love you. I know marriage is something you said you didn't need and honestly, I thought I didn't need it either. Until I met you."_

_Tears ran down her cheeks as what he was saying slowly sank in._

"_I'd only think about doing this with you, Isabella. I only want to marry you. I __**have**__ to marry you, it's a need. A need to officially make you mine and only mine for the rest of your life. For the rest of our lives." He snapped open the ring box and Bella's breath caught in her throat. "Isabella, will you marry me?"_

_He was asking her to be his wife! His partner. He wanted her in his life, by his side, in his bed…_

_Forever._

_Ohmygod!_

_She was going to be Mrs. Cullen! Mrs. Carlisle Cullen. Dr. Cullen's wife. He was going to be her husband! She never realized how badly she actually wanted that until this very minute._

_Her eyes darted over his face and she saw his smile slowly start to falter._

_Why wasn't he smiling? Had he changed his mind? She looked at the ring still nestled inside the box._

_Oh!_

_She suddenly realized she wouldn't be any of those things if she didn't answer him. And yet, she continued to stand there staring at him._

_Make a sound, Swan. Moan, grunt, nod! Do something!_

_Carlisle slowly lowered his hand that held the ring box._

"_Isabella, I-"_

"_Yes!" she cried finally finding her voice. Her heart pitter-pattered faster than she'd ever felt it at that simple word. "Yes, Carlisle."_

"_Yes?" The smile returned and he squeezed her hand tighter._

"_Yes!" She laughed and threw her arms around him. "Yes, I'll marry you!"_

_Carlisle pulled away and quickly slipped the ring on her finger as if he was afraid she'd change her mind._

"_You'll never regret it," he promised and crushed his lips to hers._

_The wedding was small and intimate with only ten people in attendance, not including the soon to be bride and groom and JP, four months later. Edward served as Carlisle's best man and Alice, of course, was her maid of honour. _

_With so few people, Bella and Carlisle decided to have the ceremony take place in their backyard. It was very simple and suited both of them._

_Bella stared out the patio windows watching their guests take their seats. On one side sat Renee with an empty chair between her and Esme meant for Charlie. Behind them were Irina and her husband, Garrett. On the other side of the make shift aisle was Angela, a shy girl that Edward had recently began dating, with Jasper on her right. Behind them sat three of Carlisle's friends and colleagues from the hospital._

_She'd invited James and Victoria, but with it being so close to her due date flying wasn't possible. He wished them both luck though and promised to bring the family to visit as soon as they were settled. It still surprised everyone, including Carlisle, how close their friendship had become over the past couple of years. Honestly, she was probably the most surprised by it. If someone had told her four years ago she'd be friendly with James she would have laughed in their face and called them delusional. _

"_Ready?" Charlie asked softly beside her._

_She pulled her eyes away from the audience waiting for her and smiled at her father. "Yes."_

_And with that, Charlie walked her towards the man who would become her husband. A man who looked not in the least bit nervous, but more like an excited kid on Christmas morning. _

_A man she loved more with every breath she took._

"Isabella?"

Carlisle's soft concerned voice snapped her out of her memory and brought her back to reality.

"Hmm?" She looked up at him.

"Are you alright? You zoned out on me."

"I'm fine," Bella assured him with a smile. "I was just thinking of our wedding."

He smiled and softly brushed a stray hair from her face.

"Do you wish we had done something like this?" He looked around the ballroom filled with guests and extravagant decorations. "You deserved something like this," he said sounding wistful.

"Hey." She placed her hand on his cheek and turned his attention back to her. "I loved our wedding. I wouldn't trade those memories for anything. All this," she gestured with her hand, "is too over the top for me."

"You deserve the best, Mrs. Cullen." He smiled at her.

"I have the best, Mr. Cullen," she reminded him.

He kissed her gently on the lips, hugging her as close as her body would allow.

"Are you sure you're feeling okay?" he asked again, this time dropping his hand to her rounded stomach. "The trip didn't take too much out of you?"

"I'm fine. We're both fine," she added with a soft laugh. "The trip was nothing compared to Alice."

"Are you tired?"

"Carlisle, I'm fine. Your daughter is doing somersaults, or jumping jacks, as we speak." She took his hand and moved it to the side of her stomach where the baby was kicking.

He grinned as his unborn child thumped his palm.

"She's a fighter."

"I'm afraid how much harder those kicks are going to get in the next 3 months," Bella confessed.

"Three months," Carlisle muttered still totally focused on her stomach. "I can't believe she'll be here so soon."

_Carlisle gently set the small pharmacy bag on the night stand and sat on the bed next to her._

"_Feeling any better?" he asked his bride of four months._

"_I feel like I've been run over by a truck…and then it backed up and ran me over again to make sure I was dead," she mumbled._

_Carlisle chuckled softly as she glared at him._

"_It's not funny. I look like shit and I feel even worse, and I have a photo shoot tomorrow." She sighed and eyed the white paper bag. "Did you get the night time-knock-me-out for days medicine I asked for?"_

_He bit his lip, a habit he'd just recently started this past week and nodded. He blamed her for that of course._

"_Thanks." She reached for the bag, but he stopped her. "What?"_

"_There's something else I bought, too."_

_She lifted an eyebrow in question and dumped the bag's contents on the bed. NyQuil, Advil, a pregnancy test, gravol …_

_Wait. What?_

_Bella slowly picked up the box with a shaky hand and looked at Carlisle._

"_I don't think you have the flu," he said softly._

"_Of course it's the flu!" she insisted. "It couldn't be…this." She shook the box._

_He smirked. "It couldn't?"_

_Bella blushed and looked down at the box again. Of course it could. She'd forgotten to fill her birth control prescription after they'd returned from their honeymoon two months ago. She just hadn't gotten around to it and Carlisle didn't seem concerned, and honestly, neither had she. They both knew there could be consequences for their unprotected actions, but that hadn't prompted either of them to take other precautions. _

_Bella knew there was a very good chance she could be pregnant._

"_What if I am?" she asked in a hushed tone._

"_Then…we are." He shrugged, but she didn't miss the hopeful and excited gleam in his eyes._

_He wanted this._

_Bella eyed the rectangular box that held the answer to her future. To their future._

_She sighed and left the bed, slowly shuffling to the bathroom hoping to keep the nausea at bay if she didn't move too quickly. She quickly glanced at the directions - really, how hard could it be? - and did as instructed. _

_She went to sit with Carlisle, who held her hand as they waited the three minutes, neither speaking. Carlisle looked at her when the time was up, but she couldn't make herself move_

"_Do you want me to look?" he asked._

"_I don't know." She bit her lip, looking at the bathroom._

"_Together?" She nodded and together they checked that tiny plastic stick_

_Bella felt her heart drop into her stomach at what she saw. She picked up the test and looked from it to her husband._

"_Does that mean…" She let the question trail off as he nodded._

_Negative._

_It wasn't the result she was expecting, from the test or herself. She was actually disappointed and a glance at Carlisle told her she wasn't the only one._

"_Could it be wrong?" she asked._

"_There's always a chance, but I doubt it. You can make an appointment with your doctor to be sure, though." He smiled at her, but it didn't reach his eyes like normal._

_The doctor confirmed the same thing the test had. She wasn't pregnant and it actually was the flu._

"_We could try," Bella suggested to Carlisle a month later._

_He looked at her, surprised by her words. "You want a baby?"_

"_Do you?" she asked._

"_I thought you didn't want children," he said instead of answering._

"_Neither did I until I held that negative test." She scooted closer to him on the couch. "I saw the way your eyes lit up, Carlisle."_

_He dropped his eyes to her flat stomach and he smiled._

"_It would be amazing, beautiful, to see you pregnant with my child." He looked up at her. "With our child. But is it what you want?"_

"_I want your baby, Carlisle."_

_With that the trying began. A lot of trying. What seemed so easy for everyone else was a challenge for her. Bella was beginning to feel frustrated to the point that she didn't even want to try anymore._

"_It has to be me, Carlisle!" she sobbed one night. "We know it's not you."_

_He held her and comforted her as best he could, assuring her if they couldn't have a baby it would still be fine. But the more time went on the more she wanted it._

_And finally after eight months, two pink lines appeared on her test stick. She let out a scream so loud Carlisle ran upstairs sure he'd find her hurt._

"_Isabella, what-"_

"_It has two lines!" she cried spinning around and thrusting the test at him. "We're going to have a baby!"_

_Carlisle slowly reached for the test and stared at it for a full minute before a grin spread across his face and he wrapped her in his arms._

"_Congratulations, Daddy," she whispered._

"It does seem like its gone by so fast," Bella said coming back to the present again.

"I can't wait to meet her." Carlisle rubbed the spot where the baby continued to kick, smiling.

"There are a lot of us that can't wait to meet her," Edward said from behind him.

Bella looked up and smiled at him.

Things had definitely changed in the past three years. Edward and Carlisle's relationship had gone from non-existent to unbelievably close. Of course it didn't happen over night and it had taken a lot of work, a lot of tears, anger and finally acceptance and forgiveness on both parts.

Bella had been worried the news of the baby would set back all the progress they had made, but to her surprise Edward showed no resentment to finding out he was going to have a sibling. He'd embraced the idea better than anyone had expected.

She looked at Angela and suspected she had a lot to do with Edward's personality change. They'd been together over a year now and Carlisle told her he'd never seen his son this happy with someone, including Tanya.

She'd asked what had happened between the two of them and all Carlisle could tell her was they'd decided to stay friends, but nothing more. She wanted to teach ballet after she couldn't dance anymore and Edward decided to tour Europe after he'd finished school. Europe was where he'd met Angela, who was originally from Portland.

Even though he never came right out and said it, Bella figured Angela was the real reason he'd decided to move to Seattle a few months ago. He was now teaching music and writing it in his spare time and hoped to put out a c.d. in the near future.

"Have you decided on a name yet for my baby sister?" he asked.

"We're working on it." Carlisle smiled at his son who genuinely smiled back.

"Don't wait too long or she'll be No Name Cullen," he teased.

"We have some time still," Bella said patting her stomach.

"You wouldn't know it to look at you, Bella. You're huge!" He laughed.

Bella rolled her eyes. "You really know how to make a girl feel good about herself, Eddie."

He scowled at the name. He despised her nickname for him, which is why she only used it when he was being an ass.

"Uncle Eddie." Angela giggled. "I think that's adorable."

"You," he said pointing at Angela all in good fun, "don't put any ideas in her." He winked at Bella. "Auntie Angie seems to fit, though."

Angela blushed and looked at her feet.

Carlisle chuckled. "I think both sound fine. Don't you, Bella."

"Oh, definitely." Bella grinned. "Uncle Eddie is priceless."

Edward sighed and shook his head. "Dad, for my sister's sake, don't let her have any naming rights." He winked again and left to find Jasper and Alice.

Carlisle turned back to her and smiled as he ran his hands down her back, pulling her back into his embrace to dance. They swayed to the music in silence for awhile, neither feeling the need to talk.

"Summer," Carlisle whispered against her temple a few minutes later.

She pulled back and quirked an eyebrow. "Summer?"

"For her name." He smiled softly at her. "I think it has a lot of significance."

"Oh, really? How so?"

"We met in the summer and she'll be born in the summer, it's like coming full circle."

Bella looked up at him, loving him even more in that moment than she ever thought possible.

"I like Summer," she whispered.

"Summer Renee?"

Bella's eyes filled with tears at the suggestion. They'd never talked about naming the baby after a family member, but of course he knew what she really wanted. He always knew.

"It's perfect," she said.

He leaned down and brushed his lips against hers, whispering, "You're perfect."

Four years ago she didn't believe in perfection, or marriage or children. Happily ever afters were meant for fairy tales and didn't happen in real life. They especially didn't happen to women like her.

Until her prince charming walked into her father's living room and introduced himself as Carlisle Cullen and she found herself swept away in exactly that.

Their own kind of perfection.

_**A/N: Soooo, what do you think? Everyone gets their HEA and Edward doesn't end up with Tanya. I'm still surprised by all the emails and comments I got regarding her with Edward. She wan't even a character, merely mentioned, and you all hated her lol.**_

_**For the last time, thank you to everyone who kept up with this story and sent all their love and reviews. **_

_**There could be more coming from me, I have some ideas swimming around, so keep a look out. You have a favourite author submit button for a reason ;)**_


	20. Chapter 20

Okay, I apologize for the fake chapter and I swore I would never do anything like this, BUT I have some awesome news to share!

For the past year I have been working on an original fiction and I am excited to announce that Last Call will be available September 29, 2011!

If you made it through this fanfic and like my writing, I have an author page set up on Facebook .com/pages/Jennifer-Schmidt/181909148531269

And for the Twitter followers you can find me jleeschmidt

Like the page, follow me on twitter, or both!, and be kept up to date with all that's happening surrounding Last Call and any other future books.

A huge thank you to everyone who keeps re-reading, recommending, and reviewing WHACW still! I never thought this little fic would receive so much recognition! And to all of you who nominated and voted for the awards it's been nominated for you all rock! WHACW hasn't won any, but seriously, that clichéd saying about it being an honour just to be nominated is actually true.

And to those who keep inquiring about future fanfics I might write, I do have one in the works. It's only a o/s, and will more than likely be my last. I hope to have it up soon. As for PWF, I'm undecided if I will ever finish that one…

Hope to see you on the outside of fanfic!


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